Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a twist on this thread. How about clueless house guests? I’m hosting SIL and she arrived over the weekend for an 8 day stay. We have had numerous discussions and conflicts in the past about how disruptive her visits are to the kids sleep. Both kids have sleep disorders and my biggest stressor in life is getting my youngest to sleep and ensuring she gets the maximum sleep possible. My husband and I were looking forward to sleeping in Saturday morning (only day for the next week) and was woken up at 6:40am to giggling and screaming laughter from SIL and daughter together in the next room. SIL seemed confused when husband went in and asked them to be quiet and asking why daughter was awake. My son woke up moments later. I couldn’t fall asleep after that. Daughter was up almost 2 hours earlier than a normal Saturday. And his family wonders why visits are so exhausting!

If your kids have sleep disorders you should offer to pay for a hotel for your visitors, you really just should not have overnight guests.

Not PP you were talking to, but my son has a sleep disorder, untreatable sleep apnea. It's NOT a joke. It will shorten his life, make him more liable to develop dementia, and worsens his existing ADHD and daily capabilities. No one should scoff at such medical troubles.

Why would I pay for hotels for guests? Our house is too small for guests. We see each other at non-Holiday times, that's all.

I’m not “scoffing,” I’m saying that if there’s a problem with guests, you should prioritize the health of the people who live in the house, and not have guests!

Sounds like you live close to your family; how nice. Some of us don’t and don’t get the chance to see each other very often. So yes, if they buy plane tickets and rent a car the least I can do is entertain them and pay for a few nights in a hotel to protect my kids’ health.

Again, no one is “scoffing,” so consider stop being so knee-jerk defensive.

PP you replied to. My family lives in Europe, actually. We see each other rarely. Less than once a year. We each pay for our own hotels, PP.

Anonymous wrote:My mom gets very upset when people are early or late. I am flying into her town, and will have about 24 hours there before I fly back. But if my plane is on time, I won't see her for the first couple hours because I can't be early. To be clear, she lives in a senior building, and we will be eating dinner in the dining room, so she's not cooking and wanting me out of her hair.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We left my MIL alone in our house for a few hours yesterday while we were running errands. Later that evening, in front of the whole family, she asked what was "in the red container in the basement freezer."

The lady obviously snooped the whole house while we were gone AND THEN told on herself. (The basement is creepy and down a steep flight of stairs and she had absolutely no reason to go down there.) Lesson learned about who to leave alone, I guess.

Currently at my MIL's house where my nightstand get rummaged through every day. I have no idea what she thinks she'll find because I keep the weed I brought in the garage. LOL.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom proudly told me on Monday that she just finished cooking the turkey so she can re-heat it for us Thursday.

This right here is the kind of wacky I love finding buried in these threads among the house too cold/too hot, garbage police, and nobody is allowed to eat posts!

Anonymous wrote:My mom proudly told me on Monday that she just finished cooking the turkey so she can re-heat it for us Thursday.

Anonymous wrote:I read this entire thread to find out what was in the red container in the basement fridge…

Anonymous wrote:I read this entire thread to find out what was in the red container in the basement fridge…

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To be fair, some of us like to factor in our effect on the environment and keep the temperatures low for that reason. My husband and I keep our house temperature lower to use less fossil fuel energy. Yes, we know it’s a small effect we can have overall, but we are trying to do our part, even if it is small.

My mom says stuff like this when it’s convenient. It’s Greta Thunberg cosplay. The truth is that she is too overwhelmed to figure out how to replace drafty doors and windows or add more insulation, “doesn’t believe” in efficient bulbs or newer hot water heaters, and thinks replacement windows are ugly, and believes that a cold laundry room=second fridge, so she uses an ungodly amount of natural gas to heat the house to just above 60.

It could easily be cut by 75% if she’d make the house more energy efficient.

But then she also wouldn’t have the fun of penning everyone into the one tiny warm room or keeping us docile by slowing our heart rates down.

New hot water heat is not energy efficient. On demand tankless is.
You could just suggest she add interior vinyl storm windows, very easy to install with pressure fit. Much cheaper than new windows.
If she really wants to be energy efficient, create zones for heating/air cooling within the house. Seriously, why should a laundry room that is seldom occupied be heated like the rest of the house?
-architect, Passive House trained, LEED certified

Anonymous wrote:Arrived at MIL's yesterday, and am here for the whole week. Need a distraction from her fretting over cooking (which I am doing all of) and financial planning (which she only trusts DH around).

I'll start:

- House is freezing. MIL considers setting temp to 65 high, and says it's because kids are from south (California). I grew up in Midwest, BTW. I've been wrapped up in blanket since getting here...MIL nearly fainted when I suggested setting temp to 67.
- MIL insists on hosting dinner. Will no longer let me host, which involves travel, nor SIL who is 15 minutes away. But MIL hates cooking and does not have a full size oven...so getting meal together is lots of coordination and drama.

Anonymous wrote:There is no quiet way to empty a dishwasher.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a twist on this thread. How about clueless house guests? I’m hosting SIL and she arrived over the weekend for an 8 day stay. We have had numerous discussions and conflicts in the past about how disruptive her visits are to the kids sleep. Both kids have sleep disorders and my biggest stressor in life is getting my youngest to sleep and ensuring she gets the maximum sleep possible. My husband and I were looking forward to sleeping in Saturday morning (only day for the next week) and was woken up at 6:40am to giggling and screaming laughter from SIL and daughter together in the next room. SIL seemed confused when husband went in and asked them to be quiet and asking why daughter was awake. My son woke up moments later. I couldn’t fall asleep after that. Daughter was up almost 2 hours earlier than a normal Saturday. And his family wonders why visits are so exhausting!

How old are your kids that you expect them to sleep until 9am or later? 6:40 is a typical waking time for young kids and it sounds like they were staying in their room. I’d be interested to hear your SILs take on this visit.

All three of my kids are professional sleepers at 5, 7, 9. If we let them they'll sleep until 10 every morning.

Then you do not provide age appropriate bedtimes. This does make your poor children good sleepers. It makes them chronically exhausted. Good sleepers sleep 7/8pm to 7/8am.

Anonymous wrote:There is no quiet way to empty a dishwasher.

Anonymous wrote:Oh my god this thread has made me realize I’m a garbage mom.

Instead of putting trash in the kitchen trash bag, I always take it out to the big trash can, which we keep in the garage.

I don’t know why, except maybe 1. I’m too lazy to take off the baby lock and 2. I get mad when the kitchen trash is over full and H still hasn’t taken it out. Better to just not look at it at all.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a twist on this thread. How about clueless house guests? I’m hosting SIL and she arrived over the weekend for an 8 day stay. We have had numerous discussions and conflicts in the past about how disruptive her visits are to the kids sleep. Both kids have sleep disorders and my biggest stressor in life is getting my youngest to sleep and ensuring she gets the maximum sleep possible. My husband and I were looking forward to sleeping in Saturday morning (only day for the next week) and was woken up at 6:40am to giggling and screaming laughter from SIL and daughter together in the next room. SIL seemed confused when husband went in and asked them to be quiet and asking why daughter was awake. My son woke up moments later. I couldn’t fall asleep after that. Daughter was up almost 2 hours earlier than a normal Saturday. And his family wonders why visits are so exhausting!

If your kids have sleep disorders you should offer to pay for a hotel for your visitors, you really just should not have overnight guests.

Not PP you were talking to, but my son has a sleep disorder, untreatable sleep apnea. It's NOT a joke. It will shorten his life, make him more liable to develop dementia, and worsens his existing ADHD and daily capabilities. No one should scoff at such medical troubles.

Why would I pay for hotels for guests? Our house is too small for guests. We see each other at non-Holiday times, that's all.

I’m not “scoffing,” I’m saying that if there’s a problem with guests, you should prioritize the health of the people who live in the house, and not have guests!

Sounds like you live close to your family; how nice. Some of us don’t and don’t get the chance to see each other very often. So yes, if they buy plane tickets and rent a car the least I can do is entertain them and pay for a few nights in a hotel to protect my kids’ health.

Again, no one is “scoffing,” so consider stop being so knee-jerk defensive.