Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I was in a similar situation in college receiving that kind of communication for a minor mistake and will never forget the lonely panic, especially because it was too late at night to call home in a different time zone, I was too embarrassed to go to friends until I understood what was happening, and I was too compliant to say something back to the administrators who contacted me, as well as too naive to realize I could have. We didn’t really have documents on the internet at the time, so my version of Katie Meyer’s frantic toggling between screens was furiously paging through the rules section of my course book to try to understand. I ended up graduating late because of it, and even with a diploma and it being mostly a secret, the shame followed me for years.

This isvery much how I envision her reacting. I’m sorry that happened to you and I hope you feel less shameful now.

I don’t feel less shame, but thank you. The few people I’ve told the story to said things like “you should have known”, and “it was your fault, what did you expect.” So I don’t tell anyone now.

That’s why I have so much empathy for Katie Meyer, especially when I read all of these posters saying how she messed up and should have been ready to pay the price. For every person that says people make mistakes and should be forgiven, there are far more in the other camp who are ruthlessly unforgiving of others. They’re more than happy for the world to be an “every man for himself” place and they’re grateful for others’ mistakes and see them an opportunity to pull ahead. It’s like being in a hurdles race and constantly hoping the rest of the heat will hit a hurdle and fall.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"If you just read the headlines, I can understand why many question the merits of the lawsuit. .

But digging deeper, it's hard not to conclude that Stanford's handling of the case was overly punitive and inconsistent with their handling of other campus disciplinary cases. That contributes to the mental health crisis on campus...the sense that discipline is arbitrary and unfair, and certain groups of students are protected by the university while others face more severe consequences. There's no question she shouldn't have poured coffee on the football player. Yet reading the details of how it was handled, I can't see how anyone can logically conclude that the university's actions and threats were appropriate. College kids aren't known for sound judgment...I get that there are lessons to be learned and responsibility to be taken, but I'm floored that anyone in the administration thought this approach was a sound way to produce those outcomes. Clearly it wasn't.

One can only hope that this tragedy might lead to reform. Sadly, a lawsuit is sometimes what it takes for change to happen."

+1000

I'm a Stanford alum. I'm very familiar with the Fundamental Standard and the disciplinary process. There was absolutely no reason to threaten expulsion for what she did. The school's disciplinary process goes overboard and is very unevenly applied. There was no need to go nuclear on her like this for something that didn't involve serious harm to the victim.

There is a group of alumni lawyers who have been working to reform the process for a few years now, as well as an internal committee that has called for changes to no avail.

I am also an alum and you summarized how I and the alums I know feel.

I don’t know a single alum that isn’t on the side of the family. We are all appalled by Stanford.

Anonymous wrote:"If you just read the headlines, I can understand why many question the merits of the lawsuit. .

But digging deeper, it's hard not to conclude that Stanford's handling of the case was overly punitive and inconsistent with their handling of other campus disciplinary cases. That contributes to the mental health crisis on campus...the sense that discipline is arbitrary and unfair, and certain groups of students are protected by the university while others face more severe consequences. There's no question she shouldn't have poured coffee on the football player. Yet reading the details of how it was handled, I can't see how anyone can logically conclude that the university's actions and threats were appropriate. College kids aren't known for sound judgment...I get that there are lessons to be learned and responsibility to be taken, but I'm floored that anyone in the administration thought this approach was a sound way to produce those outcomes. Clearly it wasn't.

One can only hope that this tragedy might lead to reform. Sadly, a lawsuit is sometimes what it takes for change to happen."

+1000

I'm a Stanford alum. I'm very familiar with the Fundamental Standard and the disciplinary process. There was absolutely no reason to threaten expulsion for what she did. The school's disciplinary process goes overboard and is very unevenly applied. There was no need to go nuclear on her like this for something that didn't involve serious harm to the victim.

There is a group of alumni lawyers who have been working to reform the process for a few years now, as well as an internal committee that has called for changes to no avail.