Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m incredibly proud of what my kids have done in their post college years. (Yes, without loans). When they ask why we dont have a lake house I smille and remind them we paid $200,000 to $250,000 for each of them to attend their greatl LACs.

My mom had four kids. Her rules were everyone must get a graduate degree. All four kids did. Her other rules were no loans. Not allowed. Her final rule she was not paying for college. We all graduated loan free.

I recall one day in grad school in freezing winter I worked ten hours at work had three hours of class and was doing homework at 1am. I was ready to drop out. My mom came downstairs and I told her she packed a bag of my stuff and opened the door and said drop outs don’t live in my house. I go it is freezing out and 1 am. She goes I am not the drop out you are. I changed my mind!!

To the day she died still pissed at sister for not finishing PhD. Her only drop out.

The internal contradictions here are priceless. A parent can think and believe that a high school graduate is an adult who has to pay for college themselves. But that same parent is a complete hypocrite when she (i) insists the kids go to college (and graduate school!) and even worse, forbid them financial an education with loans. That's not treating your kids like adults, it's picking and choosing when they are adults to justify your decision not to pay for college.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m incredibly proud of what my kids have done in their post college years. (Yes, without loans). When they ask why we dont have a lake house I smille and remind them we paid $200,000 to $250,000 for each of them to attend their greatl LACs.

My mom had four kids. Her rules were everyone must get a graduate degree. All four kids did. Her other rules were no loans. Not allowed. Her final rule she was not paying for college. We all graduated loan free.

I recall one day in grad school in freezing winter I worked ten hours at work had three hours of class and was doing homework at 1am. I was ready to drop out. My mom came downstairs and I told her she packed a bag of my stuff and opened the door and said drop outs don’t live in my house. I go it is freezing out and 1 am. She goes I am not the drop out you are. I changed my mind!!

To the day she died still pissed at sister for not finishing PhD. Her only drop out.

Leaving aside that your mother purported to control her adult kids' lives, it's not 1980 anymore. We no longer live in a country where you can work your way through college. It's not a thing anymore.

My mom had four kids. Her rules were everyone must get a graduate degree. All four kids did. Her other rules were no loans. Not allowed. Her final rule she was not paying for college. We all graduated loan free.

I recall one day in grad school in freezing winter I worked ten hours at work had three hours of class and was doing homework at 1am. I was ready to drop out. My mom came downstairs and I told her she packed a bag of my stuff and opened the door and said drop outs don’t live in my house. I go it is freezing out and 1 am. She goes I am not the drop out you are. I changed my mind!!

To the day she died still pissed at sister for not finishing PhD. Her only drop out.

This story is irrelevant. College costs and financing were different a generation ago.

What you’re missing is that your child is not a first generation college student so they won’t have all the funding opportunities you had.

Also, college is exponentially more expensive now than when you were attending.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m incredibly proud of what my kids have done in their post college years. (Yes, without loans). When they ask why we dont have a lake house I smille and remind them we paid $200,000 to $250,000 for each of them to attend their greatl LACs.

My mom had four kids. Her rules were everyone must get a graduate degree. All four kids did. Her other rules were no loans. Not allowed. Her final rule she was not paying for college. We all graduated loan free.

I recall one day in grad school in freezing winter I worked ten hours at work had three hours of class and was doing homework at 1am. I was ready to drop out. My mom came downstairs and I told her she packed a bag of my stuff and opened the door and said drop outs don’t live in my house. I go it is freezing out and 1 am. She goes I am not the drop out you are. I changed my mind!!

To the day she died still pissed at sister for not finishing PhD. Her only drop out.

Wow! She sounds like a class A bitch! Sorry you all had her for a mom. Yes, you all achieved quite a bit but she was abusive.

No but sounds like you are one.

-dp

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:College tuition has doubled since 2009. That is only 11 years. Which means your 7 year old will be paying 140k a year at Syracuse, Case Western, Fordham and Villanova.

Even university of Delaware will be charging 100k a year for out of state students

Its not going to be that much or they go to the state school.

DC residents don't have a state school. Just sayin'

I know people don't like it, but UDC is an accredited school.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:College tuition has doubled since 2009. That is only 11 years. Which means your 7 year old will be paying 140k a year at Syracuse, Case Western, Fordham and Villanova.

Even university of Delaware will be charging 100k a year for out of state students

Its not going to be that much or they go to the state school.

DC residents don't have a state school. Just sayin'

Anonymous wrote:College tuition has doubled since 2009. That is only 11 years. Which means your 7 year old will be paying 140k a year at Syracuse, Case Western, Fordham and Villanova.

Even university of Delaware will be charging 100k a year for out of state students

Its not going to be that much or they go to the state school.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m incredibly proud of what my kids have done in their post college years. (Yes, without loans). When they ask why we dont have a lake house I smille and remind them we paid $200,000 to $250,000 for each of them to attend their greatl LACs.

My mom had four kids. Her rules were everyone must get a graduate degree. All four kids did. Her other rules were no loans. Not allowed. Her final rule she was not paying for college. We all graduated loan free.

I recall one day in grad school in freezing winter I worked ten hours at work had three hours of class and was doing homework at 1am. I was ready to drop out. My mom came downstairs and I told her she packed a bag of my stuff and opened the door and said drop outs don’t live in my house. I go it is freezing out and 1 am. She goes I am not the drop out you are. I changed my mind!!

To the day she died still pissed at sister for not finishing PhD. Her only drop out.

Wow! She sounds like a class A bitch! Sorry you all had her for a mom. Yes, you all achieved quite a bit but she was abusive.

Where else is the money going? Are you saving it all for retirement? Are you spending it instead?

Anonymous wrote:I’m incredibly proud of what my kids have done in their post college years. (Yes, without loans). When they ask why we dont have a lake house I smille and remind them we paid $200,000 to $250,000 for each of them to attend their greatl LACs.

My mom had four kids. Her rules were everyone must get a graduate degree. All four kids did. Her other rules were no loans. Not allowed. Her final rule she was not paying for college. We all graduated loan free.

I recall one day in grad school in freezing winter I worked ten hours at work had three hours of class and was doing homework at 1am. I was ready to drop out. My mom came downstairs and I told her she packed a bag of my stuff and opened the door and said drop outs don’t live in my house. I go it is freezing out and 1 am. She goes I am not the drop out you are. I changed my mind!!

To the day she died still pissed at sister for not finishing PhD. Her only drop out.

I’m incredibly proud of what my kids have done in their post college years. (Yes, without loans). When they ask why we dont have a lake house I smille and remind them we paid $200,000 to $250,000 for each of them to attend their greatl LACs.

OP, you do you.

We have bought MD prepaid tuition for 5 years for each kid, and saved money for them to go to any college. And we have saved for them to go to graduate/law/medical/business school too. Which means that we have lived WAY below our means all our lives and we don't really mind it.

Now, the kids have to just work bloody hard in HS and in college so that they earn some merit scholarship too. The best case scenario would be if they got the merit scholarships and the money that we have saved for their education can then go towards buying them a new car and downpayment of their first house. I think that will give them a huge advantage in life. Hopefully, they will then start saving for their own kids and by the power of compounding they will come out ahead.

More than that...the sense of accomplishment to work hard and achieve will forever fuel them to succeed. What more can you ask if the child is self-motivated?

College tuition has doubled since 2009. That is only 11 years. Which means your 7 year old will be paying 140k a year at Syracuse, Case Western, Fordham and Villanova.

Even university of Delaware will be charging 100k a year for out of state students

College tuition is way up. My two daughters in college I was almost embarrassed to tell my college tuition Freshman year was $900 dollars! Room and board was $1,800. I paid slightly under 3k a year for school.

My daughters both have merit aid. 13k and 15k and I still pay around 32k each!!