Anonymous
Post 05/20/2026 11:10     Subject: Why its almost always women putting partner's career ahead of their own
Anonymous wrote:There are definitely women who put their careers first. We know some.

I find these marriages often don’t last as the women feel dissatisfied with the husband. Even if the husband is the default parent, the wife often still handles the mental load of the kids and becomes controlling and bossy. Man is emasculated. Sometimes there is cheating.

I’m a SAHM and while it is acceptable for a woman to stay home with their kids, the man may be seen as lazy. We know one dad who has kids who no longer need him home and he just looks lazy at this point living off his wife. He works out and cooks. Ok for a woman. Not ok for a man.

I’ve known about half a dozen SAHDs in DC and they are invariably great. People seem to respect them (I certainly did, they were always nice, smart guys) and truth be told, their marriages seemed better than most. I also think about how awesome that is for their kids. The best boyfriend I ever had, had a dad who stayed home for a few years.
Anonymous
Post 05/20/2026 11:09     Subject: Why its almost always women putting partner's career ahead of their own
Anonymous wrote:This is 2026. Why aren't more men doing it?


If and when women do this, it is purely based on the woman's cold calculation of what she thinks will be on her own best interests.

Your assumption that women are being altruistic or making sacrifices which results in net negative expected utility for themselves is amusingly naive.