Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm not signing my kids up for swim team - so saying I don't respect an activity that somehow needs 36 parent volunteers to run a swim meet -- that's just information in case you'd like to know -- you all sound crazy needing so many volunteers.

If the system doesn't work -- change it.

That’s the thing- this isn’t unique to swim. Every year our rec sports league is begging for parents to volunteer to coach. And that’s only 2 parents needed for a dozen kids or so.

DP. Yes it is. You really can’t see the difference between needing 2 volunteers to coach a rec team or be team managers in other sports and the roughly 20-25 (or more) volunteers needed at EACH swim meet?? Another difference is that your kid won’t get kicked off the rec team if you don’t volunteer to coach, yet you are fine kicking kids off the swim team if their parents don’t volunteer. Should we presume that you are volunteering for every single sport and activity your kids do since you feel so strongly about it?

PP is right that all of you sound crazy advocating for a system that clearly isn’t working any longer. There have been suggestions on this thread about how to address this and every single one got shot down essentially because “that’s just not how it is.”

My kids play rec soccer. Each game there are essentially 3 volunteers- 2 coaches and a parent to bring snacks. 3 volunteers for 10 players.

Summer swim meets require roughly 30 volunteers, split with the other team we need to provide 15-16 of them for 180 swimmers.

15-16 volunteers for roughly 80-120 swimmers at the average A meet for each team. There’s no reason to not have enough volunteers.

Are you really adverse to volunteering and being involved with your children’s activities?

My kids used to play rec soccer too. There is absolutely no need for a snack volunteer. One perfect example of a completely unnecessary volunteer role. Our rec teams decided to do away with snack when people didn’t want to bring any.

I lead my DD’s Girl Scout troop and my DH is the team manger for our DS’s club sports team. Both of these roles are very time consuming. And no, I’d rather not stand outside in the blazing sun in 90 degree weather for hours to be a timer or run the snack bar (again why is a snack bar even necessary??). I’ve been a timer on many occasions but it’s absolutely miserable and the teams do nothing to make it more comfortable for the volunteers. We had 2 people pass out last year due to heat. This (and the attitudes of the swim moms as displayed here) are why people want nothing to do with volunteering for this particular activity.

So why not figure out a way to make it easier and more comfortable for people to get involved instead of bashing them for not being as into swim as you are?

Tell me you’re a millennial without telling me you’re a millennial!! lol

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I belong to a pool that has a swim team.

My kids dont swim on the team.

These swim team parents can be nuts. There are women who get very invested in being swim team mom and make it their lives and want it to be everyone else's lives as well. I hear them talking at the pool and see requests for volunteers, etc. Someone even asked ME to volunteer once, and tried to make me feel guilty about saying no!! When I don't have a kid on the team!

Here's the thing. A lot of these "MUST" volunteer activities are BS. You don't need a snack bar. You don't need snacks. If you think your kid is going to be hungry, bring snacks for them. You don't need to make damn gift bags for a swim banquet. You don't need a crafts table. Furthermore, I see parents doing jobs teenagers could do. Why aren't the teenagers out stacking and unstacking the chairs, for example?

Parents need to streamline the volunteer duties down to the absolute necessities. Don't ask people to spend their time doing stupid BS like gift bags.

People are going to hate on this because you don’t have a kid on the team, but you make legitimate points that maybe people in the thick of it can’t see. There are definitely extraneous volunteer positions, outside of deck positions at meets, that you can do without. The point about the set up and take down of meets being handled by teens is a legitimate one. For the people that want to pay to outsource their volunteer requirements it would be pretty easy to recruit teens to do some roles for pay (set up and take down of meets, timing at a meet they aren’t swimming in). One of the problems is people with the mindset of “it’s always been done this way so this is what we are doing” and an unwillingness to explore other ways of doing things.

Our teens do set-up and take down for free, lol. They are awesome, and very helpful. Of course, they learned that from watching their parents pitch in and help too.

We don't have a ton of teens who aren't swimming in meets- I'm sure that's different on bigger teams, but it would mean people alternating timing while jumping back and forth to clerk of course. Not impossible, but a logistical nightmare (and at least for A meets, everyone is trying to finish to get the pool open). We do have teens time for B meets, but if this were a paid position, it would be expensive fast. 3 hours X $10 X 3 people X 6 lanes = $500/meet. Not insurmountable, but is it worth it? I'm not sure.

I think the people who don't volunteer don't realize that it's the best way to become a part of the (very welcoming) community. That's the beauty of summer swim! It is a community in a way that most other rec sports are not. We spend a lot of time together in the summer- and even if I don't love all the people, it is wonderful to have that sense of connection.

I don't really care if other people think it's all crazy, (I always say summer swim is kind of like a cult) but complaining about having to volunteer while still signing up your kid is pretty obnoxious. Either get on board, help to make things better or quit

I didn’t mean the pool should pay the teens to do things like time at meets they aren’t swimming in or do set up and take down for meets, the parents that want to buy their way out of volunteering can sign up for one of those slots and then pay one of the teens directly to do it for them. My teen would 100% time some B meets for a little cash. Have a sign up genius slot for teens willing to fill a volunteer slot for money and let the parents who want to pay a kid to fill their volunteer slot get a teen off the list to do that for them.

Yeah, that’s a good idea- or even just as volunteers. There’s tons of demand around here for kids to cover required snack bar shifts in other sports, seems like the same could work

There may be demand but is there supply? How will the kids get paid? Seems like the pool should just send the scofflaws a bill for missed hours.

Anonymous wrote:As a single mom, I feel exempt from volunteering. I’ve got more than my share to do.

We had a team rep whose husband died a few months before the start of the season. Another mom frequently volunteered while her spouse battled pancreatic cancer and died a week after Labor Day.

Single moms (and dads) definitely can volunteer.

Anonymous wrote:This thread reinforces that I cannot wait for my kids to be done with summer swim!! I prefer the crazy soccer parents over these judgy and uptight swim parents any day!

Which parents, the one who can’t pull their weight or the ones who are doing what is asked? Its SO easy to just avoid all of this and take your kid somewhere else to swim or just find another summer activity. It’s entirely optional to participate but if you choose to participate you need to do your part.

I think what sometimes gets lost in these conversations is the point of rec league swim.

These teams are meant to be fun, community-driven, healthy, all-in summer experiences. They’re not the same as year-round club swimming. If you want your kids to get the full magic of summer swim, you kind of have to be part of that community too—just paying a fee and opting out of everything else doesn’t really create that experience.

Having grown up in Northern Virginia Swim League and now being on the back end of my own kid’s time in it, I do feel like some of that intention has shifted a bit with how competitive things have become.

When I was a kid, the pool was our summer. We biked there (starting way younger than people would be comfortable with now), stayed all day, and went home at dinner. There wasn’t a rigid volunteer schedule—parents just showed up when they could, kept an eye on things, and pitched in where needed. Somehow it all worked because there was a shared understanding: this was our team, our kids, our community.

Every parent knew every kid. If you were at the pool, you were part of the family.

I know things are different now, and structure is necessary. But the core idea still matters. If you’re not in it for the community, you’re missing a big part of what makes summer swim special. At that point, lessons or year-round club might be a better fit—because rec swim really is about showing up, pitching in, and being part of something bigger than just your own swimmer.

This thread reinforces that I cannot wait for my kids to be done with summer swim!! I prefer the crazy soccer parents over these judgy and uptight swim parents any day!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm not signing my kids up for swim team - so saying I don't respect an activity that somehow needs 36 parent volunteers to run a swim meet -- that's just information in case you'd like to know -- you all sound crazy needing so many volunteers.

If the system doesn't work -- change it.

That’s the thing- this isn’t unique to swim. Every year our rec sports league is begging for parents to volunteer to coach. And that’s only 2 parents needed for a dozen kids or so.

DP. Yes it is. You really can’t see the difference between needing 2 volunteers to coach a rec team or be team managers in other sports and the roughly 20-25 (or more) volunteers needed at EACH swim meet?? Another difference is that your kid won’t get kicked off the rec team if you don’t volunteer to coach, yet you are fine kicking kids off the swim team if their parents don’t volunteer. Should we presume that you are volunteering for every single sport and activity your kids do since you feel so strongly about it?

PP is right that all of you sound crazy advocating for a system that clearly isn’t working any longer. There have been suggestions on this thread about how to address this and every single one got shot down essentially because “that’s just not how it is.”

If you’re against it stop signing up. Or go play the sports where some other suckers will sign up to be coach and assistant coach. But if those teams asked each parent to take a turn coaching for a week, and you just didn’t do your turn, that makes you the jerk.

Again with the name calling! I guess when you don’t have a substantive response, that’s your best retort along with “then just quit.” And not that it’ll matter, but we actually do volunteer for our kids’ sports teams, at school and for other activities. Some of these roles are pretty time consuming. Our experience in all of these other areas is how I know there’s a better way to handle volunteers here. You clearly don’t want to listen. Have fun wrangling the parents again this summer.

What is your point? This is how summer swim is set up. Volunteer, or don't. You know the committment when you sign up.

Agree. I don't see why there are 12 pages arguing about this. Yes, you are a loser if you sign your kid up and shirk your volunteer obligations and yes, the whole neighborhood knows who you are.

Right! Just don't put your kid in activities that require volunteer time. Everybody is busy, it doesn't make you special.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The snack bar is a fundraiser. It is one of the pieces that makes summer swim affordable.

I spent 100 on donuts one meet. They sold $10 worth. It's a BS fundraiser. Id love to see what the total cost of donated food versus money raised.

I'd rather pay 75 per summer swim compared to 25 per kid AND dont let the people with 3+ kid not pay for each kid.

Your summer swim registration fee is only $25 per kid?????

Anonymous wrote:As a single mom, I feel exempt from volunteering. I’ve got more than my share to do.

No you don’t get a pass. Sorry.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I sign up to volunteer for another type of organization. I did so because I thought I’d build a community while supporting my kid. The only jobs available jobs clearly no one else wanted and required me to work alone. So didn’t meet anyone. Like it was so clicky there only friends did “team work” items - like planning events.

I volunteer a lot for another organization and am one of the few. It is so much better because as a volunteer you get to know people by working together and get to influence decisions about the organization and learn how things work.

For the first I’m going to do the bare minimum next year to not get fined. Sucks for them as they are now begging for volunteers.

When my daughter does swim for the first time this year and will only do the bare minimum. First organization ruined it for me.

Just don’t sign her up. Going in with that attitude is going to make it miserable for everyone.

Eh, if the PP meets the bare minimum volunteer requirements that is all that’s necessary. Do your required hours and keep it moving.

Anonymous wrote:I sign up to volunteer for another type of organization. I did so because I thought I’d build a community while supporting my kid. The only jobs available jobs clearly no one else wanted and required me to work alone. So didn’t meet anyone. Like it was so clicky there only friends did “team work” items - like planning events.

I volunteer a lot for another organization and am one of the few. It is so much better because as a volunteer you get to know people by working together and get to influence decisions about the organization and learn how things work.

For the first I’m going to do the bare minimum next year to not get fined. Sucks for them as they are now begging for volunteers.

When my daughter does swim for the first time this year and will only do the bare minimum. First organization ruined it for me.

Just don’t sign her up. Going in with that attitude is going to make it miserable for everyone.

I sign up to volunteer for another type of organization. I did so because I thought I’d build a community while supporting my kid. The only jobs available jobs clearly no one else wanted and required me to work alone. So didn’t meet anyone. Like it was so clicky there only friends did “team work” items - like planning events.

I volunteer a lot for another organization and am one of the few. It is so much better because as a volunteer you get to know people by working together and get to influence decisions about the organization and learn how things work.

For the first I’m going to do the bare minimum next year to not get fined. Sucks for them as they are now begging for volunteers.

When my daughter does swim for the first time this year and will only do the bare minimum. First organization ruined it for me.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's hard to find the time to volunteer for anything if you work full time, but summer swim is particularly rough. It starts in June when school is still in session and there's a flurry of end-of-year school activities. In our case, my kids are still in school for the first 3 weeks of the season and it's madness. On top of that, there is often overlap with spring or club sports wrapping up for the season. It's non-stop for nearly the entire month.

My kids are old enough now that I can let them manage themselves during the meets and they'll keep track of their events, and I can volunteer during the meets. But that wasn't the case when they were younger! There is no way my youngest would've made it to any of her events if she was left to manage herself during meets.

I am so tired of that excuse that your kids are so helpless they need you hovering. There are so many coaches and helpers in the team area. Let them know of your concern the kid might get distracted and let them do their job while you do one of your own.

I am also tired of the "I work full time". I also work full time, with a commute, and volunteer a ton for both summer swim (team rep) and other organizations throughout the year.

There are also a number of behind the scene jobs that can be done at random times.

I think some people are just doers and others are sit on your lazy***ers.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I belong to a pool that has a swim team.

My kids dont swim on the team.

These swim team parents can be nuts. There are women who get very invested in being swim team mom and make it their lives and want it to be everyone else's lives as well. I hear them talking at the pool and see requests for volunteers, etc. Someone even asked ME to volunteer once, and tried to make me feel guilty about saying no!! When I don't have a kid on the team!

Here's the thing. A lot of these "MUST" volunteer activities are BS. You don't need a snack bar. You don't need snacks. If you think your kid is going to be hungry, bring snacks for them. You don't need to make damn gift bags for a swim banquet. You don't need a crafts table. Furthermore, I see parents doing jobs teenagers could do. Why aren't the teenagers out stacking and unstacking the chairs, for example?

Parents need to streamline the volunteer duties down to the absolute necessities. Don't ask people to spend their time doing stupid BS like gift bags.

People are going to hate on this because you don’t have a kid on the team, but you make legitimate points that maybe people in the thick of it can’t see. There are definitely extraneous volunteer positions, outside of deck positions at meets, that you can do without. The point about the set up and take down of meets being handled by teens is a legitimate one. For the people that want to pay to outsource their volunteer requirements it would be pretty easy to recruit teens to do some roles for pay (set up and take down of meets, timing at a meet they aren’t swimming in). One of the problems is people with the mindset of “it’s always been done this way so this is what we are doing” and an unwillingness to explore other ways of doing things.

Our teens do set-up and take down for free, lol. They are awesome, and very helpful. Of course, they learned that from watching their parents pitch in and help too.

We don't have a ton of teens who aren't swimming in meets- I'm sure that's different on bigger teams, but it would mean people alternating timing while jumping back and forth to clerk of course. Not impossible, but a logistical nightmare (and at least for A meets, everyone is trying to finish to get the pool open). We do have teens time for B meets, but if this were a paid position, it would be expensive fast. 3 hours X $10 X 3 people X 6 lanes = $500/meet. Not insurmountable, but is it worth it? I'm not sure.

I think the people who don't volunteer don't realize that it's the best way to become a part of the (very welcoming) community. That's the beauty of summer swim! It is a community in a way that most other rec sports are not. We spend a lot of time together in the summer- and even if I don't love all the people, it is wonderful to have that sense of connection.

I don't really care if other people think it's all crazy, (I always say summer swim is kind of like a cult) but complaining about having to volunteer while still signing up your kid is pretty obnoxious. Either get on board, help to make things better or quit

I didn’t mean the pool should pay the teens to do things like time at meets they aren’t swimming in or do set up and take down for meets, the parents that want to buy their way out of volunteering can sign up for one of those slots and then pay one of the teens directly to do it for them. My teen would 100% time some B meets for a little cash. Have a sign up genius slot for teens willing to fill a volunteer slot for money and let the parents who want to pay a kid to fill their volunteer slot get a teen off the list to do that for them.

Yeah, that’s a good idea- or even just as volunteers. There’s tons of demand around here for kids to cover required snack bar shifts in other sports, seems like the same could work

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I belong to a pool that has a swim team.

My kids dont swim on the team.

These swim team parents can be nuts. There are women who get very invested in being swim team mom and make it their lives and want it to be everyone else's lives as well. I hear them talking at the pool and see requests for volunteers, etc. Someone even asked ME to volunteer once, and tried to make me feel guilty about saying no!! When I don't have a kid on the team!

Here's the thing. A lot of these "MUST" volunteer activities are BS. You don't need a snack bar. You don't need snacks. If you think your kid is going to be hungry, bring snacks for them. You don't need to make damn gift bags for a swim banquet. You don't need a crafts table. Furthermore, I see parents doing jobs teenagers could do. Why aren't the teenagers out stacking and unstacking the chairs, for example?

Parents need to streamline the volunteer duties down to the absolute necessities. Don't ask people to spend their time doing stupid BS like gift bags.

People are going to hate on this because you don’t have a kid on the team, but you make legitimate points that maybe people in the thick of it can’t see. There are definitely extraneous volunteer positions, outside of deck positions at meets, that you can do without. The point about the set up and take down of meets being handled by teens is a legitimate one. For the people that want to pay to outsource their volunteer requirements it would be pretty easy to recruit teens to do some roles for pay (set up and take down of meets, timing at a meet they aren’t swimming in). One of the problems is people with the mindset of “it’s always been done this way so this is what we are doing” and an unwillingness to explore other ways of doing things.

Our teens do set-up and take down for free, lol. They are awesome, and very helpful. Of course, they learned that from watching their parents pitch in and help too.

We don't have a ton of teens who aren't swimming in meets- I'm sure that's different on bigger teams, but it would mean people alternating timing while jumping back and forth to clerk of course. Not impossible, but a logistical nightmare (and at least for A meets, everyone is trying to finish to get the pool open). We do have teens time for B meets, but if this were a paid position, it would be expensive fast. 3 hours X $10 X 3 people X 6 lanes = $500/meet. Not insurmountable, but is it worth it? I'm not sure.

I think the people who don't volunteer don't realize that it's the best way to become a part of the (very welcoming) community. That's the beauty of summer swim! It is a community in a way that most other rec sports are not. We spend a lot of time together in the summer- and even if I don't love all the people, it is wonderful to have that sense of connection.

I don't really care if other people think it's all crazy, (I always say summer swim is kind of like a cult) but complaining about having to volunteer while still signing up your kid is pretty obnoxious. Either get on board, help to make things better or quit

I didn’t mean the pool should pay the teens to do things like time at meets they aren’t swimming in or do set up and take down for meets, the parents that want to buy their way out of volunteering can sign up for one of those slots and then pay one of the teens directly to do it for them. My teen would 100% time some B meets for a little cash. Have a sign up genius slot for teens willing to fill a volunteer slot for money and let the parents who want to pay a kid to fill their volunteer slot get a teen off the list to do that for them.