Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This has been hard. My child has gotten into their safeties (Towson/Salisbury) which they are NOT enthusiastic about. They have also gotten into some of their reach/target schools. Unfortunately, those schools so far are around 60k per year with merit (child has 4.8 gpa). Financial aid is minimal. I don't have an amazing salary, but child has substantial college savings because of extenuating circumstances (not enough to cover 240k though). They go to a decent high school in Montgomery County, and it is sad for them to see their classmates commit to schools they cannot commit to. How do you help your child handle going to a safety so they can graduate college without debt? My child is so disappointed to have to go to school with peers who didn't grind like them and sacrifice time. But they/we just aren't willing or able to pay 50k PLUS per year. They want to go to med school after college as well, so the price of undergrad really matters. Please tell me your stories of going to a safety bc of money and kid thriving.

Here is a hopefully encouraging story: I and many many people I know went to a state flagship, graduated with minimal debt, and then took out big loans to go to a top tier private law school. We all had the loans paid off in 5-8 years and are financially thriving.

For parents with juniors: use the net price calculators on the college websites to get a sense of what financial aid package may look like before your kid applies. If you have money set aside, you should expect to pay up unless the school gives a lot of merit aid to applicants who have a similar academic profile to your DC's.

But OP didn't know what the merit would look like until her kid receives admissions decisions. The merit came back lower than expected. That's the problem here.

Merit is pretty standardized, tied to certain stats. Again, some homework would have helped set more accurate expectations.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This has been hard. My child has gotten into their safeties (Towson/Salisbury) which they are NOT enthusiastic about. They have also gotten into some of their reach/target schools. Unfortunately, those schools so far are around 60k per year with merit (child has 4.8 gpa). Financial aid is minimal. I don't have an amazing salary, but child has substantial college savings because of extenuating circumstances (not enough to cover 240k though). They go to a decent high school in Montgomery County, and it is sad for them to see their classmates commit to schools they cannot commit to. How do you help your child handle going to a safety so they can graduate college without debt? My child is so disappointed to have to go to school with peers who didn't grind like them and sacrifice time. But they/we just aren't willing or able to pay 50k PLUS per year. They want to go to med school after college as well, so the price of undergrad really matters. Please tell me your stories of going to a safety bc of money and kid thriving.

Here is a hopefully encouraging story: I and many many people I know went to a state flagship, graduated with minimal debt, and then took out big loans to go to a top tier private law school. We all had the loans paid off in 5-8 years and are financially thriving.

For parents with juniors: use the net price calculators on the college websites to get a sense of what financial aid package may look like before your kid applies. If you have money set aside, you should expect to pay up unless the school gives a lot of merit aid to applicants who have a similar academic profile to your DC's.

But OP didn't know what the merit would look like until her kid receives admissions decisions. The merit came back lower than expected. That's the problem here.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Posting again since I’m not sure where mine went. OP only mentions her salary. It’s possible the exceptional limited funds are life insurance payout after death of the child’s other parent. Let’s not presume it’s a trust or gift and judge her.

She said it is from family, that’s not insurance. She said it is family money, but not in a 529, which means it isn’t listed when they ask for money.

But yeah, I judge her since she refuses to say the amount.

Wow. DP here but that's a really harsh position.

College costs way too much these days. Surely OP can't be blamed for not wanting to spend her entire nest egg on high-priced colleges when there are less expensive opportunities.

Some posters are completely out of touch with the types of financial decisions that many parents have to make.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Posting again since I’m not sure where mine went. OP only mentions her salary. It’s possible the exceptional limited funds are life insurance payout after death of the child’s other parent. Let’s not presume it’s a trust or gift and judge her.

She said it is from family, that’s not insurance. She said it is family money, but not in a 529, which means it isn’t listed when they ask for money.

But yeah, I judge her since she refuses to say the amount.

Why do you keep saying not listed? All the money in all the accounts and properties held in OP, spouse’s and child’s names gets reported. Retirement accounts and primary residence are an exception for FAFSA, but not CSS.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Posting again since I’m not sure where mine went. OP only mentions her salary. It’s possible the exceptional limited funds are life insurance payout after death of the child’s other parent. Let’s not presume it’s a trust or gift and judge her.

She said it is from family, that’s not insurance. She said it is family money, but not in a 529, which means it isn’t listed when they ask for money.

But yeah, I judge her since she refuses to say the amount.

Wow. DP here but that's a really harsh position.

College costs way too much these days. Surely OP can't be blamed for not wanting to spend her entire nest egg on high-priced colleges when there are less expensive opportunities.

Some posters are completely out of touch with the types of financial decisions that many parents have to make.

Absolutely. If you don’t spend your entire nest egg, don’t complain when you aren’t receiving $$. You are making a choice. You are choosing not to spend the money you have on your child’s education. Don’t expect everyone else to pay for it instead. Go to the school that you are WILLING to pay for. Get it? Expensive college is a luxury good. Pay for it or don’t pay for it.

More for your full pay family, right?

The middle class donut hole families are getting left behind. The wealthy can easily afford these $400K schools and the needy families get FA. It really sucks to be responsible and save rather than buying the more expensive house, going on luxury vacations, etc. then having colleges tell you to spend all your savings on them.

These same colleges were accessible to the middle class 15-20 years ago. The cost of attendance has increased far beyond salary increases for the middle class.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just go to UMD. If your kid can’t get into UMD in-state, you are probably leaving out a key bit of information. Perhaps they are not as high performing as you think. Let me guess, SAT under 1500, but just “doesn’t test well.”

Nice snark. We know multiple kids from neighboring counties who got into U Maryland with 2.8 unweighted GPA and less than 1100 SAT. Facts.

I bet your “facts” here are leaving out some other important facts.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Posting again since I’m not sure where mine went. OP only mentions her salary. It’s possible the exceptional limited funds are life insurance payout after death of the child’s other parent. Let’s not presume it’s a trust or gift and judge her.

She said it is from family, that’s not insurance. She said it is family money, but not in a 529, which means it isn’t listed when they ask for money.

But yeah, I judge her since she refuses to say the amount.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Posting again since I’m not sure where mine went. OP only mentions her salary. It’s possible the exceptional limited funds are life insurance payout after death of the child’s other parent. Let’s not presume it’s a trust or gift and judge her.

She said it is from family, that’s not insurance. She said it is family money, but not in a 529, which means it isn’t listed when they ask for money.

But yeah, I judge her since she refuses to say the amount.

Wow. DP here but that's a really harsh position.

College costs way too much these days. Surely OP can't be blamed for not wanting to spend her entire nest egg on high-priced colleges when there are less expensive opportunities.

Some posters are completely out of touch with the types of financial decisions that many parents have to make.

Absolutely. If you don’t spend your entire nest egg, don’t complain when you aren’t receiving $$. You are making a choice. You are choosing not to spend the money you have on your child’s education. Don’t expect everyone else to pay for it instead. Go to the school that you are WILLING to pay for. Get it? Expensive college is a luxury good. Pay for it or don’t pay for it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Posting again since I’m not sure where mine went. OP only mentions her salary. It’s possible the exceptional limited funds are life insurance payout after death of the child’s other parent. Let’s not presume it’s a trust or gift and judge her.

She said it is from family, that’s not insurance. She said it is family money, but not in a 529, which means it isn’t listed when they ask for money.

But yeah, I judge her since she refuses to say the amount.

Wow. DP here but that's a really harsh position.

College costs way too much these days. Surely OP can't be blamed for not wanting to spend her entire nest egg on high-priced colleges when there are less expensive opportunities.

Some posters are completely out of touch with the types of financial decisions that many parents have to make.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This has been hard. My child has gotten into their safeties (Towson/Salisbury) which they are NOT enthusiastic about. They have also gotten into some of their reach/target schools. Unfortunately, those schools so far are around 60k per year with merit (child has 4.8 gpa). Financial aid is minimal. I don't have an amazing salary, but child has substantial college savings because of extenuating circumstances (not enough to cover 240k though). They go to a decent high school in Montgomery County, and it is sad for them to see their classmates commit to schools they cannot commit to. How do you help your child handle going to a safety so they can graduate college without debt? My child is so disappointed to have to go to school with peers who didn't grind like them and sacrifice time. But they/we just aren't willing or able to pay 50k PLUS per year. They want to go to med school after college as well, so the price of undergrad really matters. Please tell me your stories of going to a safety bc of money and kid thriving.

Here is a hopefully encouraging story: I and many many people I know went to a state flagship, graduated with minimal debt, and then took out big loans to go to a top tier private law school. We all had the loans paid off in 5-8 years and are financially thriving.

For parents with juniors: use the net price calculators on the college websites to get a sense of what financial aid package may look like before your kid applies. If you have money set aside, you should expect to pay up unless the school gives a lot of merit aid to applicants who have a similar academic profile to your DC's.

But OP didn't know what the merit would look like until her kid receives admissions decisions. The merit came back lower than expected. That's the problem here.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This has been hard. My child has gotten into their safeties (Towson/Salisbury) which they are NOT enthusiastic about. They have also gotten into some of their reach/target schools. Unfortunately, those schools so far are around 60k per year with merit (child has 4.8 gpa). Financial aid is minimal. I don't have an amazing salary, but child has substantial college savings because of extenuating circumstances (not enough to cover 240k though). They go to a decent high school in Montgomery County, and it is sad for them to see their classmates commit to schools they cannot commit to. How do you help your child handle going to a safety so they can graduate college without debt? My child is so disappointed to have to go to school with peers who didn't grind like them and sacrifice time. But they/we just aren't willing or able to pay 50k PLUS per year. They want to go to med school after college as well, so the price of undergrad really matters. Please tell me your stories of going to a safety bc of money and kid thriving.

Here is a hopefully encouraging story: I and many many people I know went to a state flagship, graduated with minimal debt, and then took out big loans to go to a top tier private law school. We all had the loans paid off in 5-8 years and are financially thriving.

For parents with juniors: use the net price calculators on the college websites to get a sense of what financial aid package may look like before your kid applies. If you have money set aside, you should expect to pay up unless the school gives a lot of merit aid to applicants who have a similar academic profile to your DC's.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Posting again since I’m not sure where mine went. OP only mentions her salary. It’s possible the exceptional limited funds are life insurance payout after death of the child’s other parent. Let’s not presume it’s a trust or gift and judge her.

She said it is from family, that’s not insurance. She said it is family money, but not in a 529, which means it isn’t listed when they ask for money.

But yeah, I judge her since she refuses to say the amount.

Anonymous wrote:This has been hard. My child has gotten into their safeties (Towson/Salisbury) which they are NOT enthusiastic about. They have also gotten into some of their reach/target schools. Unfortunately, those schools so far are around 60k per year with merit (child has 4.8 gpa). Financial aid is minimal. I don't have an amazing salary, but child has substantial college savings because of extenuating circumstances (not enough to cover 240k though). They go to a decent high school in Montgomery County, and it is sad for them to see their classmates commit to schools they cannot commit to. How do you help your child handle going to a safety so they can graduate college without debt? My child is so disappointed to have to go to school with peers who didn't grind like them and sacrifice time. But they/we just aren't willing or able to pay 50k PLUS per year. They want to go to med school after college as well, so the price of undergrad really matters. Please tell me your stories of going to a safety bc of money and kid thriving.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Posting again since I’m not sure where mine went. OP only mentions her salary. It’s possible the exceptional limited funds are life insurance payout after death of the child’s other parent. Let’s not presume it’s a trust or gift and judge her.

It is ridiculous she won’t bar the amount of money or the SAT score on an anonymous board. And then she gets indignant about it. Why should we help?