Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't the schools assess these factors for financial aid? Or you mean these families are flying under the radar?

With the family I am aware of, I suspect the house they live in is owned by grandparents. Or grandparents buy cars, clothes, etc. for lifestyle and parents submit their $60,000/yr job income tax records for financial aid.

This is what I'm thinking. A lot of people in nonprofit jobs in DC have wealthy parents who bought them homes, cars, etc.

One more suggestion: before you apply for aid from a private primary or secondary school, plug your estimated information into a college’s net price calculator tool to see if you are being realistic. You can do this for free online without divulging as much personal information as is required when you actually apply. Try this at a few different ones.

Anonymous wrote:People.

If you are so frustrated by this: APPLY FOR AID.

We were full pay on a $300K income--to be honest we never even thought to apply for aid. We found out that friends (who we introduced to the school and who have a country club membership, second home that they rent out--neither of which we have) applied for aid and were paying 25K less than we were. We applied for aid. Now we are paying 25K less.

Not willing to pass my personal financial information around to arbitrary groups of unknown adults. Not worth the risk to my credit, social security numbers, or other personal information. Look at what is happening with the NCRC head of school. Would you trust this person with that information? Everyone receiving aid from NCRC already did. If you apply for aid, lock your credit first at a minimum.

Anonymous wrote:Lots of families in my Arlington neighborhood live in $1.5M homes - homes they bought in 2009-2011 for $400-500k with a 3-4% mortgage. The parents are a HS teacher, a fire fighter, many GS 13-15 feds, a few journalists, a few nurses or physical therapists. They are not lawyers or high paid execs. It’s not their fault housing prices are so high.

We are in this boat. We bought a long time ago and our house is now worth $1.2 million despite it being a tiny home under 1000 sq ft. We have a 3.75% mortgage.

I do not work because I have a health condition that is occasionally debilitating. I’m private about it and don’t have close friends at the school. No one there knows when I’m hospitalized.

We get 20% FA. If you were looking from the outside without knowing all the facts you might think we were grifters. The FA people at the school know better.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t see why this should bother you. We bought our house for $850k and have a 2.5 percent mortgage. It’s now worth close to 2 million. My husband’s income has gone up a little but we are a single income family since I took a step back so he could advance his career and I have a small part-time work from home job. If we ever decide to make the move to private, we would be on the hook for $60,000 plus per kid if we chose the options that suit our families needs (Bullis, Saint Andrew’s). This would be a crippling level of debt when you take into consideration the rest of our expenses and our lives. Why should we be penalized because we made a great decision with our home all those years ago? I don’t see why that’s an issue.

Financial aid is not an entitlement. Your house is an asset just like a savings account or inheritance. You could use that asset to pay tuition.

what?? I’m supposed to sell our family home to pay tuition? F y o u and f y o u again. What an awful thing to say and so clueless

It’s not clueless. People’s wealth comes in different forms. You made what turned out to be a great investment in a house. Someone else could have made a great investment in Nvidia stock. It’s fine if the folks deciding on financial aid look more to the latter and less to the former in determining ability to pay, and I could understand why, but both are still assets. Someone with a lot of equity in a home could borrow against it without having to sell the house.

+1

I feel some frustration at times, too. Without aid my kid wouldn’t be able to attend. We live in a rental apartment and most of my kid’s classmates live in enormous houses both in DC and the burbs. We don’t complain publicly to anyone about our costs, yet many of those families do! And their kids get the $300+ per month daily lunch delivery, go on all the trips, etc.

The rich will never be rich enough and yet continue to get more discounts and benefits throughout life.

It’s just how it is. And it’s part of why we send our kid to private. I want better for him than what I can provide and want him exposed to what I cannot otherwise expose him to.

We are lucky to get aid and I know it. I guess I’m slightly bitter about the wealthy getting their discounts and also feel uncomfortable and out of place when I see photos of their fancy school events. All that said, at the same time I am also incredibly thankful that my family directly benefits. It’s odd feeling so conflicted.

People.

If you are so frustrated by this: APPLY FOR AID.

We were full pay on a $300K income--to be honest we never even thought to apply for aid. We found out that friends (who we introduced to the school and who have a country club membership, second home that they rent out--neither of which we have) applied for aid and were paying 25K less than we were. We applied for aid. Now we are paying 25K less.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are definitely happier being in the dark because when you see someone who has on paper the same exact life as you except for you pay twice as much as them for the same schools tuition it’s frustrating.

Well if they have the same exact life as you and at the same school, there’s a good chance you would qualify for the same aid. Perhaps it would be less frustrating if you received aid as well. Problem solved.

No, they wouldn’t. In fact, certain families who have lower total annual expenses do not qualify for financial aid due to demographic factors that are fixed. FA allocations are not solely determined based on household expenses. That’s just something to accept if you want to be a donor. If you don’t, then don’t.

How has this gone on for 14 pages…

Anonymous wrote:Lots of families in my Arlington neighborhood live in $1.5M homes - homes they bought in 2009-2011 for $400-500k with a 3-4% mortgage. The parents are a HS teacher, a fire fighter, many GS 13-15 feds, a few journalists, a few nurses or physical therapists. They are not lawyers or high paid execs. It’s not their fault housing prices are so high.

You can easily look yup what they paid.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We live in a small house with a small mortgage that affords us the budget to pay for private. Would not be happy to find out our tuition dollars are subsidizing someone with a house worth 2-3 times as much as ours. Should we upgrade and apply for financial aid?

I think about this often. How much does FA subsidize people's poor financial choices?
We are conservative with our money, live in a modest home and drive 10 year old cars which all contributes to our ability to pay for private.
But are families who are living in expensive houses with expensive cars really getting aid??

I was a major FA kid but have done well enough for myself now to be able to afford tuition, but obviously we have made some sacrifices to do so. I have donated (in varying amounts) every year since graduation and earmarked it to FA as a way to "pay back" what the school gave me.
If I find out my money is subsidizing someone who lives in a $2M house in Bethesda and drives a Tesla, I'm going to be livid.

You are going to be livid. Happening all over.

Anonymous wrote:All of you who are trying to act like you’re so
above caring about this or thinking it’s unfair must just be very very rich. And more than likely with lots of family money because anyone who has had to earn what they have wouldn’t be ok with this.

No, we just aren’t petty. Or arrogant enough to think we know everything about another family’s situation.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a school administrator, I occasionally hear OP's comments from a parent about another family. I cannot ever comment on any family's situation. But what the school knows is a lot more than what you think you know about any given family. I know about the lost job, the medical debt, the company paying the rent on a house the family doesn't actually own, the car that was a gift from a grandparent, etc.

Is it true that 75% of families are getting financial aid?

No, usually 20-30%. That poster is confused

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are definitely happier being in the dark because when you see someone who has on paper the same exact life as you except for you pay twice as much as them for the same schools tuition it’s frustrating.

“On paper”. You don’t know what their expenses are, if they are supporting elderly parents or have medical costs or are paying off college loans - all things the Clarity app asks about, just as a few examples.

People are judging without actually knowing. Again, if it ticks you off - ask for aid, stop donating, earmark your donations, or switch schools, but mind your own business.

College loans are a choice. So is supporting family. You should not be asking for aid if you have a high income and assists and you choose high expenses or debt.

You don’t get to be the arbiter of that. The school does. Deal with it.

You are greedy and really selfish. That money should not be going to rich familes but families who truely need it.

We are full pay. I just don’t believe that I have some kind of superior judgement or knowledge that give me the right to decide a school is not distributing their FA dollars as they should be. That’s not my decision, or yours. It’s the school’s. Like it or lump it.

Anonymous wrote:As a school administrator, I occasionally hear OP's comments from a parent about another family. I cannot ever comment on any family's situation. But what the school knows is a lot more than what you think you know about any given family. I know about the lost job, the medical debt, the company paying the rent on a house the family doesn't actually own, the car that was a gift from a grandparent, etc.

Is it true that 75% of families are getting financial aid?