Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm very surprised at the amount of ppl who are ok with kids being overscheduled and don't see the downsides of it.

Middle class striver mindset. They think all the elementary sports and instrument lessons will set their kids up for elite college admissions as long as they stick with the instrument and sport through high school. And because everyone in their small orbit does it they think their kids are at a disadvantage if they don't do it too. Truthfully, the HS activities that stand out the most are having a part time job and school service stuff like newspaper, yearbook, and student govt. These soccer-piano kids are a dime a dozen.

Science backs up the value of a musical education on a child’s cognitive development. It doesn’t show that for HS yearbook participation.

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:Free play is all fun and games until middle school. Then the kids with no activities have nothing to do and it’s downhill from there.

Not for all kids, our neighborhood friends and my sibling had a blast playing throughout middle school. And why not, we were kids having fun. Free play is very important for middle schoolers, I've even read articles on it. I'm not sure why or when ppl deemed them too old to do this. It was the norm for us. I don't know why ppl think they aren't deserving of free play.

Why do you think athletes aren’t getting both?

Also, our day was great - I had free play too and then just walked right on to a JV sport as a freshman having barely played. Those days are over for most schools with most sports. If you don’t have some training, you aren’t making a high school team. I absolutely loved being a high school athlete and my kids enjoy it too, so I am glad we put in the prep work to make that happen in elementary and middle.

Because this is a thread on overscheduling. And ppl are assuming that older kids don't need or want free play because they're too old or will be trouble makers. High school is obviously a little different, but middle school kids are still kids.

Most teens don't free play. At some point even MS kids grow up.

Middle school kids are 11-14. Still young enough to play and have fun. I'm not saying don't grow up at all, just don't grow up faster than you have to. I hope my kid is like me when it comes time for MS.

I really hope you are able to be flexible and realize 1) the world has changed dramatically and a lot of it is outside a parents control , 2) you aren’t going to have as much influence over your MS teen that you think you will, and 3) your child is an individual and may be very different than you were at that age, and that’s ok. Just as someone who once thought the way you did when my kids were younger…

I realize it won't be easy and my child isn't my clone, but I believe that free play and being a kid is very important. I'm not anti activities or anti screens, but I want my child to be able to entertain themselves without these things. Hopefully I've taught them well enough to make good choices.

It’s a logical fallacy that kids with a lot of extracurriculars including sports aren’t also experiencing free play. There are lot of hours in the day.

With as busy as kids are kept now a days I don't think ots that far of a stretch to say that they don't have a lot of free time

Here again is a person judging other kids’ schedules when you aren’t the parent.

This is not the norm everywhere. Whatever is going on in the dc metro area is uniquely miserable. Move somewhere with a better culture

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm very surprised at the amount of ppl who are ok with kids being overscheduled and don't see the downsides of it.

Middle class striver mindset. They think all the elementary sports and instrument lessons will set their kids up for elite college admissions as long as they stick with the instrument and sport through high school. And because everyone in their small orbit does it they think their kids are at a disadvantage if they don't do it too. Truthfully, the HS activities that stand out the most are having a part time job and school service stuff like newspaper, yearbook, and student govt. These soccer-piano kids are a dime a dozen.

I'm not middle class, my kids are super busy, and I'm not under the illusion that soccer or piano will get them into their dream college. I prefer them to be busy with enriching activities over play dates or more time on their devices. They've grown up to be interesting people with depth and diverse talents, and a network organized around their passions that we helped cultivate.

Anonymous wrote:I'm very surprised at the amount of ppl who are ok with kids being overscheduled and don't see the downsides of it.

Middle class striver mindset. They think all the elementary sports and instrument lessons will set their kids up for elite college admissions as long as they stick with the instrument and sport through high school. And because everyone in their small orbit does it they think their kids are at a disadvantage if they don't do it too. Truthfully, the HS activities that stand out the most are having a part time job and school service stuff like newspaper, yearbook, and student govt. These soccer-piano kids are a dime a dozen.

Anonymous wrote:I just posted about frequency of play dates. My son hangs out a lot with his friends. There are some kids he isn’t that into and their schedules don’t seem to line up. Then there are kids who will bend over backwards to accommodate you and your schedule. My kid is 12. We have had parents change their birthday party date for my son. Or they ask when my son is available and then plan the hang out. There are always pockets of open availability when 2 kids can find time to hang out. Both parents have to want to set it up.

I have a friend who will consider her Saturday full if she has one kid who has a 2 hour birthday party and another kid who has a 1 hour sports game. We will often have more. One kid may have a soccer game and a birthday party and other child has dance for an hour. If one child is full for the day, I won’t automatically say other kid is unavailable. The days are long. We can squeeze in a 2 hour play date if someone initiates.

That's me. I need time for myself and I didn't have kids to be run ragged by chauffeuring them from activity to activity to activity on all my days off. Sue me.

I'm very surprised at the amount of ppl who are ok with kids being overscheduled and don't see the downsides of it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Free play is all fun and games until middle school. Then the kids with no activities have nothing to do and it’s downhill from there.

Not for all kids, our neighborhood friends and my sibling had a blast playing throughout middle school. And why not, we were kids having fun. Free play is very important for middle schoolers, I've even read articles on it. I'm not sure why or when ppl deemed them too old to do this. It was the norm for us. I don't know why ppl think they aren't deserving of free play.

Why do you think athletes aren’t getting both?

Also, our day was great - I had free play too and then just walked right on to a JV sport as a freshman having barely played. Those days are over for most schools with most sports. If you don’t have some training, you aren’t making a high school team. I absolutely loved being a high school athlete and my kids enjoy it too, so I am glad we put in the prep work to make that happen in elementary and middle.

Because this is a thread on overscheduling. And ppl are assuming that older kids don't need or want free play because they're too old or will be trouble makers. High school is obviously a little different, but middle school kids are still kids.

Most teens don't free play. At some point even MS kids grow up.

Middle school kids are 11-14. Still young enough to play and have fun. I'm not saying don't grow up at all, just don't grow up faster than you have to. I hope my kid is like me when it comes time for MS.

I really hope you are able to be flexible and realize 1) the world has changed dramatically and a lot of it is outside a parents control , 2) you aren’t going to have as much influence over your MS teen that you think you will, and 3) your child is an individual and may be very different than you were at that age, and that’s ok. Just as someone who once thought the way you did when my kids were younger…

I realize it won't be easy and my child isn't my clone, but I believe that free play and being a kid is very important. I'm not anti activities or anti screens, but I want my child to be able to entertain themselves without these things. Hopefully I've taught them well enough to make good choices.

It’s a logical fallacy that kids with a lot of extracurriculars including sports aren’t also experiencing free play. There are lot of hours in the day.

With as busy as kids are kept now a days I don't think ots that far of a stretch to say that they don't have a lot of free time

So you think every kid is booked after school until bedtime and all weekend? I don't think that's true and maybe there's some other reason you're not finding kids available to play with yours.

I just posted about frequency of play dates. My son hangs out a lot with his friends. There are some kids he isn’t that into and their schedules don’t seem to line up. Then there are kids who will bend over backwards to accommodate you and your schedule. My kid is 12. We have had parents change their birthday party date for my son. Or they ask when my son is available and then plan the hang out. There are always pockets of open availability when 2 kids can find time to hang out. Both parents have to want to set it up.

I have a friend who will consider her Saturday full if she has one kid who has a 2 hour birthday party and another kid who has a 1 hour sports game. We will often have more. One kid may have a soccer game and a birthday party and other child has dance for an hour. If one child is full for the day, I won’t automatically say other kid is unavailable. The days are long. We can squeeze in a 2 hour play date if someone initiates.

You’re not wrong OP. But none of us are changing anything because our kids want to do all the things and we want them to try all the things while they’re young until they find their thing.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Free play is all fun and games until middle school. Then the kids with no activities have nothing to do and it’s downhill from there.

Not for all kids, our neighborhood friends and my sibling had a blast playing throughout middle school. And why not, we were kids having fun. Free play is very important for middle schoolers, I've even read articles on it. I'm not sure why or when ppl deemed them too old to do this. It was the norm for us. I don't know why ppl think they aren't deserving of free play.

Why do you think athletes aren’t getting both?

Also, our day was great - I had free play too and then just walked right on to a JV sport as a freshman having barely played. Those days are over for most schools with most sports. If you don’t have some training, you aren’t making a high school team. I absolutely loved being a high school athlete and my kids enjoy it too, so I am glad we put in the prep work to make that happen in elementary and middle.

Because this is a thread on overscheduling. And ppl are assuming that older kids don't need or want free play because they're too old or will be trouble makers. High school is obviously a little different, but middle school kids are still kids.

Most teens don't free play. At some point even MS kids grow up.

Middle school kids are 11-14. Still young enough to play and have fun. I'm not saying don't grow up at all, just don't grow up faster than you have to. I hope my kid is like me when it comes time for MS.

I really hope you are able to be flexible and realize 1) the world has changed dramatically and a lot of it is outside a parents control , 2) you aren’t going to have as much influence over your MS teen that you think you will, and 3) your child is an individual and may be very different than you were at that age, and that’s ok. Just as someone who once thought the way you did when my kids were younger…

I realize it won't be easy and my child isn't my clone, but I believe that free play and being a kid is very important. I'm not anti activities or anti screens, but I want my child to be able to entertain themselves without these things. Hopefully I've taught them well enough to make good choices.

It’s a logical fallacy that kids with a lot of extracurriculars including sports aren’t also experiencing free play. There are lot of hours in the day.

With as busy as kids are kept now a days I don't think ots that far of a stretch to say that they don't have a lot of free time

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Free play is all fun and games until middle school. Then the kids with no activities have nothing to do and it’s downhill from there.

Not for all kids, our neighborhood friends and my sibling had a blast playing throughout middle school. And why not, we were kids having fun. Free play is very important for middle schoolers, I've even read articles on it. I'm not sure why or when ppl deemed them too old to do this. It was the norm for us. I don't know why ppl think they aren't deserving of free play.

Why do you think athletes aren’t getting both?

Also, our day was great - I had free play too and then just walked right on to a JV sport as a freshman having barely played. Those days are over for most schools with most sports. If you don’t have some training, you aren’t making a high school team. I absolutely loved being a high school athlete and my kids enjoy it too, so I am glad we put in the prep work to make that happen in elementary and middle.

Because this is a thread on overscheduling. And ppl are assuming that older kids don't need or want free play because they're too old or will be trouble makers. High school is obviously a little different, but middle school kids are still kids.

Most teens don't free play. At some point even MS kids grow up.

Middle school kids are 11-14. Still young enough to play and have fun. I'm not saying don't grow up at all, just don't grow up faster than you have to. I hope my kid is like me when it comes time for MS.

I really hope you are able to be flexible and realize 1) the world has changed dramatically and a lot of it is outside a parents control , 2) you aren’t going to have as much influence over your MS teen that you think you will, and 3) your child is an individual and may be very different than you were at that age, and that’s ok. Just as someone who once thought the way you did when my kids were younger…

I realize it won't be easy and my child isn't my clone, but I believe that free play and being a kid is very important. I'm not anti activities or anti screens, but I want my child to be able to entertain themselves without these things. Hopefully I've taught them well enough to make good choices.

It’s a logical fallacy that kids with a lot of extracurriculars including sports aren’t also experiencing free play. There are lot of hours in the day.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Free play is all fun and games until middle school. Then the kids with no activities have nothing to do and it’s downhill from there.

Not for all kids, our neighborhood friends and my sibling had a blast playing throughout middle school. And why not, we were kids having fun. Free play is very important for middle schoolers, I've even read articles on it. I'm not sure why or when ppl deemed them too old to do this. It was the norm for us. I don't know why ppl think they aren't deserving of free play.

Why do you think athletes aren’t getting both?

Also, our day was great - I had free play too and then just walked right on to a JV sport as a freshman having barely played. Those days are over for most schools with most sports. If you don’t have some training, you aren’t making a high school team. I absolutely loved being a high school athlete and my kids enjoy it too, so I am glad we put in the prep work to make that happen in elementary and middle.

Because this is a thread on overscheduling. And ppl are assuming that older kids don't need or want free play because they're too old or will be trouble makers. High school is obviously a little different, but middle school kids are still kids.

Most teens don't free play. At some point even MS kids grow up.

Middle school kids are 11-14. Still young enough to play and have fun. I'm not saying don't grow up at all, just don't grow up faster than you have to. I hope my kid is like me when it comes time for MS.

Do you even have a middle school child?

Do you realize how difficult it is to parent this age group? They are moody and emotional. This is my absolute least favorite age.

It is like a non parent trying to tell you how to take care of a toddler when he is having a tantrum.

Almost middle school, and no, it isn't east even now. But, I'm going to try my best with it. Hopefully I can instill my values into them

Big difference between almost middle school and actual middle school.

I know there is a difference. I see this as no differebt from a parent feeling something is very important for their child. Some parents it's sports, some music others not alot of screen time ect. Maybe I'll be successful, maybe not, but I'll try.

You should try doing that without being judgmental of other's choices. Or is judging people who do things differently part of your values that you hold so dear?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Free play is all fun and games until middle school. Then the kids with no activities have nothing to do and it’s downhill from there.

Not for all kids, our neighborhood friends and my sibling had a blast playing throughout middle school. And why not, we were kids having fun. Free play is very important for middle schoolers, I've even read articles on it. I'm not sure why or when ppl deemed them too old to do this. It was the norm for us. I don't know why ppl think they aren't deserving of free play.

Why do you think athletes aren’t getting both?

Also, our day was great - I had free play too and then just walked right on to a JV sport as a freshman having barely played. Those days are over for most schools with most sports. If you don’t have some training, you aren’t making a high school team. I absolutely loved being a high school athlete and my kids enjoy it too, so I am glad we put in the prep work to make that happen in elementary and middle.

Because this is a thread on overscheduling. And ppl are assuming that older kids don't need or want free play because they're too old or will be trouble makers. High school is obviously a little different, but middle school kids are still kids.

Most teens don't free play. At some point even MS kids grow up.

Middle school kids are 11-14. Still young enough to play and have fun. I'm not saying don't grow up at all, just don't grow up faster than you have to. I hope my kid is like me when it comes time for MS.

Do you even have a middle school child?

Do you realize how difficult it is to parent this age group? They are moody and emotional. This is my absolute least favorite age.

It is like a non parent trying to tell you how to take care of a toddler when he is having a tantrum.

Almost middle school, and no, it isn't east even now. But, I'm going to try my best with it. Hopefully I can instill my values into them

Big difference between almost middle school and actual middle school.

I know there is a difference. I see this as no differebt from a parent feeling something is very important for their child. Some parents it's sports, some music others not alot of screen time ect. Maybe I'll be successful, maybe not, but I'll try.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Free play is all fun and games until middle school. Then the kids with no activities have nothing to do and it’s downhill from there.

Not for all kids, our neighborhood friends and my sibling had a blast playing throughout middle school. And why not, we were kids having fun. Free play is very important for middle schoolers, I've even read articles on it. I'm not sure why or when ppl deemed them too old to do this. It was the norm for us. I don't know why ppl think they aren't deserving of free play.

Why do you think athletes aren’t getting both?

Also, our day was great - I had free play too and then just walked right on to a JV sport as a freshman having barely played. Those days are over for most schools with most sports. If you don’t have some training, you aren’t making a high school team. I absolutely loved being a high school athlete and my kids enjoy it too, so I am glad we put in the prep work to make that happen in elementary and middle.

Because this is a thread on overscheduling. And ppl are assuming that older kids don't need or want free play because they're too old or will be trouble makers. High school is obviously a little different, but middle school kids are still kids.

Most teens don't free play. At some point even MS kids grow up.

Middle school kids are 11-14. Still young enough to play and have fun. I'm not saying don't grow up at all, just don't grow up faster than you have to. I hope my kid is like me when it comes time for MS.

Do you even have a middle school child?

Do you realize how difficult it is to parent this age group? They are moody and emotional. This is my absolute least favorite age.

It is like a non parent trying to tell you how to take care of a toddler when he is having a tantrum.

Almost middle school, and no, it isn't east even now. But, I'm going to try my best with it. Hopefully I can instill my values into them

Big difference between almost middle school and actual middle school.