Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can you afford childcare? Do you have a support system in place to help? Do you have adequate leave banked at work so that you can take off when the child is sick?

The support system should be the father.

Surely, you can comprehend that there are other support systems for raising children like grandparents and aunts and uncles, etc.? And that likewise, not all husbands function well as either support systems or fathers? Why do you think so many people get divorced?

You’re suggesting that because some fathers may not function well, op doesn’t need one.
Btw, some mothers don’t function well.
You’re already putting the child at a disadvantage because of other “fathers and husbands.”

No, I’m not suggesting that at all. OP didn’t find a great man and she’s 37 and she earns enough money and wants to be a mom. It’s basically now or never. I’m suggesting that OP should go ahead and make her dream to be a mom come true and that she doesn’t need a man to do it. Would it be better to have a great husband on this road to parenthood? Of course! But that didn’t happen yet and she doesn’t have much time to waste looking for one. Maybe she can give it another year or two, but chances are she’ll just get desperate and choose a not so great guy because of it. She’s much better off doing it alone.

What I don’t think she should do is accept your ridiculous view that she must have a man to be a mom and that because she doesn’t have one, should resign her life to being a spinster with cats or dogs or whatever it is you think people unlucky in love must do instead of having children.

And I also think she’s far more likely to find a decent man down the road when she’s not desperate.

What you are suggesting is not what is best for a child.
The derogatory name you call single women is so sexist and offensive. Not all “spinsters” have lives revolves around having cats or dogs.
What a way to put women down! Sexist ass

Ireland just enacted legislation redefining the notion of a family. Kids adapt and no, it’s not a big deal to grow up with one excellent parent who cares. I had a much better life growing up with my single mom than my poor child who was torn after divorce between two houses

Statistically children are worse off with single parents. No amount of wishing ot cheerleading changes that.

Some are throwing around “statistics,” but not backing their rants with numbers.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I also think you have to consider a 37 year old woman that really wants a child and has been dating for 20 years with no marriage proposal might have issues or personality disorders. Definitely not all but the few women i knew in this circumstance were amazing on paper and quite attractive but not kind people and would be a nightmare to be married to.

Why so judgemental about who dates at what age

PP thinks she's magical and speshful because she's married and a mother before 37

No it’s just a point. The handful of women I know at this who have never been married are attractive, check all the boxes on paper, but absolutely mean people with major personality issues. Not everyone but most.

Every single person I ever knew with a personality disorder is married, so there goes your theory.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can you afford childcare? Do you have a support system in place to help? Do you have adequate leave banked at work so that you can take off when the child is sick?

The support system should be the father.

Surely, you can comprehend that there are other support systems for raising children like grandparents and aunts and uncles, etc.? And that likewise, not all husbands function well as either support systems or fathers? Why do you think so many people get divorced?

You’re suggesting that because some fathers may not function well, op doesn’t need one.
Btw, some mothers don’t function well.
You’re already putting the child at a disadvantage because of other “fathers and husbands.”

No, I’m not suggesting that at all. OP didn’t find a great man and she’s 37 and she earns enough money and wants to be a mom. It’s basically now or never. I’m suggesting that OP should go ahead and make her dream to be a mom come true and that she doesn’t need a man to do it. Would it be better to have a great husband on this road to parenthood? Of course! But that didn’t happen yet and she doesn’t have much time to waste looking for one. Maybe she can give it another year or two, but chances are she’ll just get desperate and choose a not so great guy because of it. She’s much better off doing it alone.

What I don’t think she should do is accept your ridiculous view that she must have a man to be a mom and that because she doesn’t have one, should resign her life to being a spinster with cats or dogs or whatever it is you think people unlucky in love must do instead of having children.

And I also think she’s far more likely to find a decent man down the road when she’s not desperate.

What you are suggesting is not what is best for a child.
The derogatory name you call single women is so sexist and offensive. Not all “spinsters” have lives revolves around having cats or dogs.
What a way to put women down! Sexist ass

Ireland just enacted legislation redefining the notion of a family. Kids adapt and no, it’s not a big deal to grow up with one excellent parent who cares. I had a much better life growing up with my single mom than my poor child who was torn after divorce between two houses

Statistically children are worse off with single parents. No amount of wishing ot cheerleading changes that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The happiest people I know are single moms by choice. They all seem to have a great support network set up and are able to parent and live as they please.

You lost me at "They all seem to".

It's all rainbows and unicorns huh? DCUM attracts ideologues like PP instead of pragmatic people.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you want this deep in your heart and you have a family that will help support you, go for it. I had my twins through donor sperm and it was the best decision of my life.

Of your life, not theirs.

DP.

Did the twins personally tell you that, random Internet twit?

Common sense and statistics tell us that, real life twat.

Brilliant comeback!!!

DP but the statistics do tell us that. Maybe they’re an outlier.

Anonymous wrote:I am single, newly 37, want kids, never married. What advice would you give me?

Don't have kids by yourself.

Hi OP (and those who are interested in becoming an SMC - single mom by choice)
I became an SMC at age 41, almost 42, after a messy divorce. I am so glad I didn't have kids with my ex. You can do this. Families are very different nowadays and I am not the only SMC at my child's school. There is a big network of SMC's in this area. Join an SMC Facebook group or contact the national chapter. Shady Grove Fertility offers free counseling groups. They used to be in person but are now online it looks like. I met some of my closest friends (who are now mothers) in this group. I don't think you need to be a patient there to attend, at least in the past you didn't.
Being a single parent is tough and I always laugh at some of the posts on here from women freaking out when their husbands need to go away for the week.
It has helped to have family around but it's not necessary. Building your village is definitely something I recommend.
When I became an SMC, I made less then you do. If this is what you want, then go for it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I also think you have to consider a 37 year old woman that really wants a child and has been dating for 20 years with no marriage proposal might have issues or personality disorders. Definitely not all but the few women i knew in this circumstance were amazing on paper and quite attractive but not kind people and would be a nightmare to be married to.

Why so judgemental about who dates at what age

PP thinks she's magical and speshful because she's married and a mother before 37

Or if you’re in this situation, perhaps don’t be so defensive and consider your personality may be the biggest factor holding you back and do something about it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I also think you have to consider a 37 year old woman that really wants a child and has been dating for 20 years with no marriage proposal might have issues or personality disorders. Definitely not all but the few women i knew in this circumstance were amazing on paper and quite attractive but not kind people and would be a nightmare to be married to.

Why so judgemental about who dates at what age

PP thinks she's magical and speshful because she's married and a mother before 37

No it’s just a point. The handful of women I know at this who have never been married are attractive, check all the boxes on paper, but absolutely mean people with major personality issues. Not everyone but most.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you want this deep in your heart and you have a family that will help support you, go for it. I had my twins through donor sperm and it was the best decision of my life.

Of your life, not theirs.

DP.

Did the twins personally tell you that, random Internet twit?

How would they know, they’ve never had a dad? How sad that is.

So having a dad automatically equals a happy life?

Lol!

Don't worry about PP, he's just an incel that's upset because this i sone area where women have a significant more control than men.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I also think you have to consider a 37 year old woman that really wants a child and has been dating for 20 years with no marriage proposal might have issues or personality disorders. Definitely not all but the few women i knew in this circumstance were amazing on paper and quite attractive but not kind people and would be a nightmare to be married to.

Why so judgemental about who dates at what age

PP thinks she's magical and speshful because she's married and a mother before 37

Anonymous wrote:I also think you have to consider a 37 year old woman that really wants a child and has been dating for 20 years with no marriage proposal might have issues or personality disorders. Definitely not all but the few women i knew in this circumstance were amazing on paper and quite attractive but not kind people and would be a nightmare to be married to.

Why so judgemental about who dates at what age

I also think you have to consider a 37 year old woman that really wants a child and has been dating for 20 years with no marriage proposal might have issues or personality disorders. Definitely not all but the few women i knew in this circumstance were amazing on paper and quite attractive but not kind people and would be a nightmare to be married to.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you want this deep in your heart and you have a family that will help support you, go for it. I had my twins through donor sperm and it was the best decision of my life.

Of your life, not theirs.

DP.

Did the twins personally tell you that, random Internet twit?

Common sense and statistics tell us that, real life twat.

Brilliant comeback!!!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you want this deep in your heart and you have a family that will help support you, go for it. I had my twins through donor sperm and it was the best decision of my life.

Of your life, not theirs.

DP.

Did the twins personally tell you that, random Internet twit?

How would they know, they’ve never had a dad? How sad that is.

So having a dad automatically equals a happy life?

Lol!