Anonymous
08/10/2023 19:51
Subject: Wedding offenses: rank according to badness
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Worst: No +1, destination wedding. Couples will often say they don’t want random people at their wedding but offer plus ones for spouses and significant others they’ve never met. Just give all adults a plus one.
Also bad: No open bar — don’t host a party you can’t afford. Along those lines I would add an expectation that gifts cover the per person cost for the wedding.
Neutral: No kids, dry wedding, asking for cash gifts
Isn't a dry wedding worse than no open bar? At least there's alcohol!
No way! I don’t care if I drink or not. I’d prefer it, but if the couple doesnt drink or can’t afford to pay for the alcohol, then a dry wedding is fine. What’s NOT fine is asking your guests to pay for things at YOUR PARTY
I agree. All this shade on dry weddings is awful. Many people don’t drink - for religious or addiction or health reasons. I am delighted to share their big day with them while also being respectful of their culture or individual preferences. Can people *really* not go one night without booze??? (And I drink a lot - so I’m not a teetotaler)
I agree that cash bar is way worse than dry wedding. You don't host a party and then have your guests pay for food/drinks!! The only thing worse is doing a potluck where guests BRING FOOD as well!
What if the people getting married are poor, but they want to share their joy and exchange of vows with friends and loved ones?
The level of snobbery and entitlement on this forum is thru the roof.
In that case provide a sheet cake and punch.
Host the party you can afford.
NP and I agree with this. I think cake and punch weddings are fine if you tell people on the invitation that it will be cake and punch. There are so many polite ways to set expectations on the invitation so that your guests have an idea of what they’re getting into.
Anonymous
08/10/2023 19:35
Subject: Wedding offenses: rank according to badness
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Worst: No +1, destination wedding. Couples will often say they don’t want random people at their wedding but offer plus ones for spouses and significant others they’ve never met. Just give all adults a plus one.
Also bad: No open bar — don’t host a party you can’t afford. Along those lines I would add an expectation that gifts cover the per person cost for the wedding.
Neutral: No kids, dry wedding, asking for cash gifts
Isn't a dry wedding worse than no open bar? At least there's alcohol!
No way! I don’t care if I drink or not. I’d prefer it, but if the couple doesnt drink or can’t afford to pay for the alcohol, then a dry wedding is fine. What’s NOT fine is asking your guests to pay for things at YOUR PARTY
I agree. All this shade on dry weddings is awful. Many people don’t drink - for religious or addiction or health reasons. I am delighted to share their big day with them while also being respectful of their culture or individual preferences. Can people *really* not go one night without booze??? (And I drink a lot - so I’m not a teetotaler)
I agree that cash bar is way worse than dry wedding. You don't host a party and then have your guests pay for food/drinks!! The only thing worse is doing a potluck where guests BRING FOOD as well!
What if the people getting married are poor, but they want to share their joy and exchange of vows with friends and loved ones?
The level of snobbery and entitlement on this forum is thru the roof.
In that case provide a sheet cake and punch.
Host the party you can afford.
Anonymous
08/10/2023 19:33
Subject: Re:Wedding offenses: rank according to badness
You people are crazy - I personally love destination weddings and I've been to quite a few. Nothing better than going to France, celebrating with some close people, dressing up, and then traveling around.
Anonymous
08/10/2023 19:33
Subject: Re:Wedding offenses: rank according to badness
None actually.
People can have any kind of wedding and guests can choose not to attend. I also always give a check as a wedding gift and if the wedding is very tacky and cheap,I will give less money.
People can have any kind of wedding and guests can choose not to attend. I also always give a check as a wedding gift and if the wedding is very tacky and cheap,I will give less money.
Anonymous
08/10/2023 19:26
Subject: Wedding offenses: rank according to badness
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Worst: No +1, destination wedding. Couples will often say they don’t want random people at their wedding but offer plus ones for spouses and significant others they’ve never met. Just give all adults a plus one.
Also bad: No open bar — don’t host a party you can’t afford. Along those lines I would add an expectation that gifts cover the per person cost for the wedding.
Neutral: No kids, dry wedding, asking for cash gifts
Isn't a dry wedding worse than no open bar? At least there's alcohol!
No way! I don’t care if I drink or not. I’d prefer it, but if the couple doesnt drink or can’t afford to pay for the alcohol, then a dry wedding is fine. What’s NOT fine is asking your guests to pay for things at YOUR PARTY
I agree. All this shade on dry weddings is awful. Many people don’t drink - for religious or addiction or health reasons. I am delighted to share their big day with them while also being respectful of their culture or individual preferences. Can people *really* not go one night without booze??? (And I drink a lot - so I’m not a teetotaler)
I agree that cash bar is way worse than dry wedding. You don't host a party and then have your guests pay for food/drinks!! The only thing worse is doing a potluck where guests BRING FOOD as well!
What if the people getting married are poor, but they want to share their joy and exchange of vows with friends and loved ones?
The level of snobbery and entitlement on this forum is thru the roof.
The only way to share the joy is to invite your friends to a party then ask them to pay for it? You must be the type to not provide food at kids parties. The worst.
The PP was saying that people complaining about dry weddings are the worst. She was not talking about cash bar weddings.
No she wasn't. We're both saying the guests don't pay for the food drinks. Then PP said it was snobby because poor people apparently can't pay for food/drinks (which isn't even true). It's the cheapskates who aren't even poor who do this kind of thing.
Anonymous
08/10/2023 19:25
Subject: Wedding offenses: rank according to badness
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Worst: No +1, destination wedding. Couples will often say they don’t want random people at their wedding but offer plus ones for spouses and significant others they’ve never met. Just give all adults a plus one.
Also bad: No open bar — don’t host a party you can’t afford. Along those lines I would add an expectation that gifts cover the per person cost for the wedding.
Neutral: No kids, dry wedding, asking for cash gifts
Isn't a dry wedding worse than no open bar? At least there's alcohol!
No way! I don’t care if I drink or not. I’d prefer it, but if the couple doesnt drink or can’t afford to pay for the alcohol, then a dry wedding is fine. What’s NOT fine is asking your guests to pay for things at YOUR PARTY
I agree. All this shade on dry weddings is awful. Many people don’t drink - for religious or addiction or health reasons. I am delighted to share their big day with them while also being respectful of their culture or individual preferences. Can people *really* not go one night without booze??? (And I drink a lot - so I’m not a teetotaler)
I agree that cash bar is way worse than dry wedding. You don't host a party and then have your guests pay for food/drinks!! The only thing worse is doing a potluck where guests BRING FOOD as well!
What if the people getting married are poor, but they want to share their joy and exchange of vows with friends and loved ones?
The level of snobbery and entitlement on this forum is thru the roof.
The only way to share the joy is to invite your friends to a party then ask them to pay for it? You must be the type to not provide food at kids parties. The worst.
The PP was saying that people complaining about dry weddings are the worst. She was not talking about cash bar weddings.
Anonymous
08/10/2023 19:25
Subject: Wedding offenses: rank according to badness
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Worst: No +1, destination wedding. Couples will often say they don’t want random people at their wedding but offer plus ones for spouses and significant others they’ve never met. Just give all adults a plus one.
Also bad: No open bar — don’t host a party you can’t afford. Along those lines I would add an expectation that gifts cover the per person cost for the wedding.
Neutral: No kids, dry wedding, asking for cash gifts
Isn't a dry wedding worse than no open bar? At least there's alcohol!
No way! I don’t care if I drink or not. I’d prefer it, but if the couple doesnt drink or can’t afford to pay for the alcohol, then a dry wedding is fine. What’s NOT fine is asking your guests to pay for things at YOUR PARTY
I agree. All this shade on dry weddings is awful. Many people don’t drink - for religious or addiction or health reasons. I am delighted to share their big day with them while also being respectful of their culture or individual preferences. Can people *really* not go one night without booze??? (And I drink a lot - so I’m not a teetotaler)
I agree that cash bar is way worse than dry wedding. You don't host a party and then have your guests pay for food/drinks!! The only thing worse is doing a potluck where guests BRING FOOD as well!
What if the people getting married are poor, but they want to share their joy and exchange of vows with friends and loved ones?
The level of snobbery and entitlement on this forum is thru the roof.
+1
Honestly, I would rather a potluck in comfortable clothes than some pretentious, social media geared wedding (like a true destination wedding - be considerate - and be a good guest! If you can't be happy for the couple, stay home and brood.
Anonymous
08/10/2023 19:24
Subject: Re:Wedding offenses: rank according to badness
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Guilty of destination wedding (hours away) but gave +1, +2, accommodated friends of family with champagne toast but cash bar.
we had to budget but splurged with everything else big time.
So you splurged on everything except the one thing guests actually look forward to at weddings? What in the world were you thinking?
+1
SMH
In what world is "free alcohol" the one thing guests look forward to at weddings? You do realize you can get drunk for a pretty low price quite literally any time you want, correct?
Anonymous
08/10/2023 19:24
Subject: Wedding offenses: rank according to badness
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Worst: No +1, destination wedding. Couples will often say they don’t want random people at their wedding but offer plus ones for spouses and significant others they’ve never met. Just give all adults a plus one.
Also bad: No open bar — don’t host a party you can’t afford. Along those lines I would add an expectation that gifts cover the per person cost for the wedding.
Neutral: No kids, dry wedding, asking for cash gifts
Isn't a dry wedding worse than no open bar? At least there's alcohol!
No way! I don’t care if I drink or not. I’d prefer it, but if the couple doesnt drink or can’t afford to pay for the alcohol, then a dry wedding is fine. What’s NOT fine is asking your guests to pay for things at YOUR PARTY
I agree. All this shade on dry weddings is awful. Many people don’t drink - for religious or addiction or health reasons. I am delighted to share their big day with them while also being respectful of their culture or individual preferences. Can people *really* not go one night without booze??? (And I drink a lot - so I’m not a teetotaler)
I agree that cash bar is way worse than dry wedding. You don't host a party and then have your guests pay for food/drinks!! The only thing worse is doing a potluck where guests BRING FOOD as well!
What if the people getting married are poor, but they want to share their joy and exchange of vows with friends and loved ones?
The level of snobbery and entitlement on this forum is thru the roof.
The only way to share the joy is to invite your friends to a party then ask them to pay for it? You must be the type to not provide food at kids parties. The worst.
Anonymous
08/10/2023 19:23
Subject: Wedding offenses: rank according to badness
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Worst: No +1, destination wedding. Couples will often say they don’t want random people at their wedding but offer plus ones for spouses and significant others they’ve never met. Just give all adults a plus one.
Also bad: No open bar — don’t host a party you can’t afford. Along those lines I would add an expectation that gifts cover the per person cost for the wedding.
Neutral: No kids, dry wedding, asking for cash gifts
Isn't a dry wedding worse than no open bar? At least there's alcohol!
No way! I don’t care if I drink or not. I’d prefer it, but if the couple doesnt drink or can’t afford to pay for the alcohol, then a dry wedding is fine. What’s NOT fine is asking your guests to pay for things at YOUR PARTY
I agree. All this shade on dry weddings is awful. Many people don’t drink - for religious or addiction or health reasons. I am delighted to share their big day with them while also being respectful of their culture or individual preferences. Can people *really* not go one night without booze??? (And I drink a lot - so I’m not a teetotaler)
I agree that cash bar is way worse than dry wedding. You don't host a party and then have your guests pay for food/drinks!! The only thing worse is doing a potluck where guests BRING FOOD as well!
What if the people getting married are poor, but they want to share their joy and exchange of vows with friends and loved ones?
The level of snobbery and entitlement on this forum is thru the roof.
I am a regular drinker and agree with you completely. Nothing wrong with a dry wedding. But cash bar wedding is pretty bad.
Anonymous
08/10/2023 19:23
Subject: Wedding offenses: rank according to badness
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Worst: No +1, destination wedding. Couples will often say they don’t want random people at their wedding but offer plus ones for spouses and significant others they’ve never met. Just give all adults a plus one.
Also bad: No open bar — don’t host a party you can’t afford. Along those lines I would add an expectation that gifts cover the per person cost for the wedding.
Neutral: No kids, dry wedding, asking for cash gifts
Isn't a dry wedding worse than no open bar? At least there's alcohol!
No way! I don’t care if I drink or not. I’d prefer it, but if the couple doesnt drink or can’t afford to pay for the alcohol, then a dry wedding is fine. What’s NOT fine is asking your guests to pay for things at YOUR PARTY
I agree. All this shade on dry weddings is awful. Many people don’t drink - for religious or addiction or health reasons. I am delighted to share their big day with them while also being respectful of their culture or individual preferences. Can people *really* not go one night without booze??? (And I drink a lot - so I’m not a teetotaler)
I agree that cash bar is way worse than dry wedding. You don't host a party and then have your guests pay for food/drinks!! The only thing worse is doing a potluck where guests BRING FOOD as well!
What if the people getting married are poor, but they want to share their joy and exchange of vows with friends and loved ones?
The level of snobbery and entitlement on this forum is thru the roof.
+1 not a complete surprise though
Anonymous
08/10/2023 19:22
Subject: Re:Wedding offenses: rank according to badness
Anonymous wrote:People over 50. Destination wedding and then expect and praise those that give them presents. #TACKY
LOL. What number wedding is it? More than one = too many.
Anonymous
08/10/2023 19:21
Subject: Re:Wedding offenses: rank according to badness
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Guilty of destination wedding (hours away) but gave +1, +2, accommodated friends of family with champagne toast but cash bar.
we had to budget but splurged with everything else big time.
So you splurged on everything except the one thing guests actually look forward to at weddings? What in the world were you thinking?
+1
SMH
Anonymous
08/10/2023 19:21
Subject: Wedding offenses: rank according to badness
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Worst: No +1, destination wedding. Couples will often say they don’t want random people at their wedding but offer plus ones for spouses and significant others they’ve never met. Just give all adults a plus one.
Also bad: No open bar — don’t host a party you can’t afford. Along those lines I would add an expectation that gifts cover the per person cost for the wedding.
Neutral: No kids, dry wedding, asking for cash gifts
Isn't a dry wedding worse than no open bar? At least there's alcohol!
No way! I don’t care if I drink or not. I’d prefer it, but if the couple doesnt drink or can’t afford to pay for the alcohol, then a dry wedding is fine. What’s NOT fine is asking your guests to pay for things at YOUR PARTY
I agree. All this shade on dry weddings is awful. Many people don’t drink - for religious or addiction or health reasons. I am delighted to share their big day with them while also being respectful of their culture or individual preferences. Can people *really* not go one night without booze??? (And I drink a lot - so I’m not a teetotaler)
I agree that cash bar is way worse than dry wedding. You don't host a party and then have your guests pay for food/drinks!! The only thing worse is doing a potluck where guests BRING FOOD as well!
What if the people getting married are poor, but they want to share their joy and exchange of vows with friends and loved ones?
The level of snobbery and entitlement on this forum is thru the roof.
Anonymous
08/10/2023 19:20
Subject: Wedding offenses: rank according to badness
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Worst: No +1, destination wedding. Couples will often say they don’t want random people at their wedding but offer plus ones for spouses and significant others they’ve never met. Just give all adults a plus one.
Also bad: No open bar — don’t host a party you can’t afford. Along those lines I would add an expectation that gifts cover the per person cost for the wedding.
Neutral: No kids, dry wedding, asking for cash gifts
Isn't a dry wedding worse than no open bar? At least there's alcohol!
No way! I don’t care if I drink or not. I’d prefer it, but if the couple doesnt drink or can’t afford to pay for the alcohol, then a dry wedding is fine. What’s NOT fine is asking your guests to pay for things at YOUR PARTY
I agree. All this shade on dry weddings is awful. Many people don’t drink - for religious or addiction or health reasons. I am delighted to share their big day with them while also being respectful of their culture or individual preferences. Can people *really* not go one night without booze??? (And I drink a lot - so I’m not a teetotaler)
I agree that cash bar is way worse than dry wedding. You don't host a party and then have your guests pay for food/drinks!! The only thing worse is doing a potluck where guests BRING FOOD as well!
Cash bar is better than dry bar. If you aren’t going to drink they’re the same. And besides, you still have to tip the bartender even at an open bar so of course you’ll have cash.
It's better if your goal is to drink at the wedding, yes. It's not better, not even close, if you are the host/hostess and are trying to be polite and gracious.