Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just checking the sense of the Senate here, but do we think it would have been okay if the text has been more along the lines of “I’m sorry but I don’t think it works for me to date someone who parties the way you do and is so flirty/open with her body. Obviously you’re entitled to live your life how you want, but this is not the right fit for me.” And then she would have the option of saying “no wait, I’m over the partying and all that. What I really want is a sedate life in the suburbs.” Or say “okay. Thanks for letting me know sooner rather than later. If you need a surfer type for your nexr movie,LMK.”

No - she's a professional surfer. You don't date someone who is a professional surfer then basically say that she's a big old slut for wearing bathing suits.

I think you can say: I think you're amazing but it turns out I'm too insecure to be with someone who works in a male dominated field like you do, and I am going to work on this with my therapist, but I don't want to saddle you with this while I do. I can feel myself turning controlling here and I don't think that's good for either of us.

DP. I think you can tell another adult that their behavior is not a good fit for you without having to say it is your own issue worthy of therapy without it being abusive. People are entitled to preferences.

Sure. And that's another thing he could say - I like you but I don't think this relationship is a good fit for me. But you don't get to pursue a professional surfer and then tell her to stop talking to men or wearing bathing suits, no matter how politely you do it, and come out the good guy who was merely expressing his personal boundaries.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just checking the sense of the Senate here, but do we think it would have been okay if the text has been more along the lines of “I’m sorry but I don’t think it works for me to date someone who parties the way you do and is so flirty/open with her body. Obviously you’re entitled to live your life how you want, but this is not the right fit for me.” And then she would have the option of saying “no wait, I’m over the partying and all that. What I really want is a sedate life in the suburbs.” Or say “okay. Thanks for letting me know sooner rather than later. If you need a surfer type for your nexr movie,LMK.”

No - she's a professional surfer. You don't date someone who is a professional surfer then basically say that she's a big old slut for wearing bathing suits.

I think you can say: I think you're amazing but it turns out I'm too insecure to be with someone who works in a male dominated field like you do, and I am going to work on this with my therapist, but I don't want to saddle you with this while I do. I can feel myself turning controlling here and I don't think that's good for either of us.

DP. I think you can tell another adult that their behavior is not a good fit for you without having to say it is your own issue worthy of therapy without it being abusive. People are entitled to preferences.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just checking the sense of the Senate here, but do we think it would have been okay if the text has been more along the lines of “I’m sorry but I don’t think it works for me to date someone who parties the way you do and is so flirty/open with her body. Obviously you’re entitled to live your life how you want, but this is not the right fit for me.” And then she would have the option of saying “no wait, I’m over the partying and all that. What I really want is a sedate life in the suburbs.” Or say “okay. Thanks for letting me know sooner rather than later. If you need a surfer type for your nexr movie,LMK.”

No - she's a professional surfer. You don't date someone who is a professional surfer then basically say that she's a big old slut for wearing bathing suits.

I think you can say: I think you're amazing but it turns out I'm too insecure to be with someone who works in a male dominated field like you do, and I am going to work on this with my therapist, but I don't want to saddle you with this while I do. I can feel myself turning controlling here and I don't think that's good for either of us.

Anonymous wrote:I think it's sort of ironic that Adam Levine also had DM/texting drama right when his baby was born last year.

Levine and Hill have been friends since childhood, attended school together, Hill's dad was money manager for Levine, etc. Jonah officiated Adam's wedding.

Entitled peas in a narcissistic pod.

Anonymous wrote:he's a controlling, manipulative sh!t.
Healthy boundaries are about oneself, not others.

Anonymous wrote:Other celebs have called him out as a jerk. Their comments make me think he really is a jerk. Celebs don’t typically trash other celebs.

Anonymous wrote:Just checking the sense of the Senate here, but do we think it would have been okay if the text has been more along the lines of “I’m sorry but I don’t think it works for me to date someone who parties the way you do and is so flirty/open with her body. Obviously you’re entitled to live your life how you want, but this is not the right fit for me.” And then she would have the option of saying “no wait, I’m over the partying and all that. What I really want is a sedate life in the suburbs.” Or say “okay. Thanks for letting me know sooner rather than later. If you need a surfer type for your nexr movie,LMK.”

Anonymous wrote:I’m admittedly a Jonah Hill fan, but I seriously don’t get it.

Everything I read was basically just a calm and respectful statement of his “boundaries” in a relationship. Not something I personally would be cool with, but this idea that it was somehow “abusive” is crazy. The ex was free to decide any time if they were a good match or not.

We routinely defend women for having preferences—whether it’s wealth, height, certain type of career, liking or not liking certain hobbies or activities, drinker or non-drinker, etc. And if some MRA incel gets mad about that (surely because he doesn’t fit the criteria), he’s rightly condemned. Women don’t have to give a guy a chance if he’s a short, fat, unemployed pothead who plays video games all day.

JH doesn’t want a girlfriend who poses publicly in bikinis, or frolics in the ocean with other guys. So what? I suspect there are many people, men and women, who would feel uncomfortable with that in their partner.

Anonymous wrote:Do people think he's still a fat little kid? This is a famous 40 YEAR OLD MAN worth $100 million dollars sending this psychotic texts to a MUCH younger non-celeb woman he just started dating. While gaslighting her that he's the "perfect" boyfriend and a male feminist. The guy was OBVIOUSLY preying on her being young and dumb. He would never send such texts or make such demands on any woman his age.

Anonymous wrote:I’m admittedly a Jonah Hill fan, but I seriously don’t get it.

Everything I read was basically just a calm and respectful statement of his “boundaries” in a relationship. Not something I personally would be cool with, but this idea that it was somehow “abusive” is crazy. The ex was free to decide any time if they were a good match or not.

We routinely defend women for having preferences—whether it’s wealth, height, certain type of career, liking or not liking certain hobbies or activities, drinker or non-drinker, etc. And if some MRA incel gets mad about that (surely because he doesn’t fit the criteria), he’s rightly condemned. Women don’t have to give a guy a chance if he’s a short, fat, unemployed pothead who plays video games all day.

JH doesn’t want a girlfriend who poses publicly in bikinis, or frolics in the ocean with other guys. So what? I suspect there are many people, men and women, who would feel uncomfortable with that in their partner.