Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I must be the only one who thinks OP’s kid is insufferable. Everything is stupid and everyone is incompetent is a horrible attitude. Clearly she thinks she’s smarter than everyone. Wouldn’t expect that to change in college.

No, I agree with you. And her mother seems to be fueling this very off-putting attitude.

Anonymous wrote:I must be the only one who thinks OP’s kid is insufferable. Everything is stupid and everyone is incompetent is a horrible attitude. Clearly she thinks she’s smarter than everyone. Wouldn’t expect that to change in college.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Interesting that OP never answers the hard questions.
My take is that her DD isn't that gifted, and just has some growing up to do.

Bedtime. Now.

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She sounds really annoying TBH

She also sounds very entitled.

Maybe she should get a JOB.

Wtf is wrong with everyone? She sounds like a normal healthy teenager to me!! State school will be wonderful, OP. She will flourish and find her people!

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:Try a school like Kenyon that has super generous merit aid and where she might be a competitive applicant,too. When we did the math, it was cheaper for my child to go there than the University of Michigan.

Thanks! I'll add that one to our wish list. I looked at Kenyon when I was applying to college. Paul Newman went there. A close friend of my husband went there too.

Oberlin. Generous merit aid.

Does it give nearly full rides? Because sticker price is 60K or something. Why anybody in their right mind would pay that much for Oberlin is beyond me.

You can’t appreciate SLACs including Oberlin unless someone in your family experienced one. It’s like someone saying she can’t understand why anyone would pay $1000 for a smart phone when a $10 rotary dial phone does what a smart phone does - make phone calls. It’s hard to explain. Once you experience a smartphone, you can’t live without one.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think OP would be best served by trying to adjust what is an "elite" college. I went to a LAC that ranks in the 40s on the USNWR liberal arts college rankings. They give tons of merit aid (I had a full tuition scholarship), have good honors programs, and send some people on to great grad schools. You can find schools like that where the cost will be competitive with, or better than, state schools for a student like this (a good SAT would have helped in the past, but I guess not right now). These places can be engaging environments for bright students who are looking for that, and most classes are discussion driven and small.

Strong state schools can be like that, too, there's just more people to sort through to find the ones to engage with. And it will take longer to get to the smaller, discussion classes.

But you have think beyond HYP, or Amherst, Swarthmore, Williams, etc. That's okay. There are plenty of good schools out there.

Sounds like a great place to be. Mind sharing the name of the school? How did this experience help you with your career PP, and what do you do for a living now?

I'm not going to name the school. I just want to get the word out that you can go pretty far down the list of best colleges and still find wonderful schools that may be a good fit for your child. And the further you go down the list, the more likely you are to get merit aid that brings the cost down in line with state schools. Many of my classmates could only attend our LAC because their merit aid made it cost equivalent to the state flagship.

But you also have to be mindful of things, too. My school was very Greek, so it's not the best fit for everyone. Two of the most intellectual people I know transferred out. One left (to UChicago) because he wanted to have intense academic discussions all the time, to the point that he had trouble making any friends (he also didn't like the professors challenging him), and one left (to the state flagship) because the social environment didn't work for him. I also knew a couple of people who left because they couldn't cut it academically.

For me, it helped me get into a good law school, which helped me land a good lawfirm job.

Anonymous wrote:With OP's child's high stats, it's most definitely not State U. or bust. The top LACs and private R1 universities will come down to at least your EFC. Unless money is truly no object, EFC is based where paying will require substantial sacrifice, but isn't impossible. But it's true that family on 85K per year will probably have a harder time paying 15k than a family on 170k paying 55k.

The sweet spot for high-stats MC/UMC kids is the 2nd/3rd-tier LACs which will roll out the red carpet with merit money and will probably have a special program for a handful of the most exceptional students.

This is what Muhlenberg is doing for our son and it's a real possibility he'll take them up on it. While it doesn't have a faculty that is as distinguished as, say, Williams or Swarthmore, the professors are all PhDs from R1 universities, who are hired and retained for their desire and ability to engage with undergraduates -- unlike my experience as an undergrad at a private T10-T15 university in the Midwest.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In addition to finding good schools that are pretty far down in the rankings, you can also find strong faculty who want to work with smart, interested students.

Yes, you want to believe that, you NEED to believe that... because no matter what, that's where your kid is.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In addition to finding good schools that are pretty far down in the rankings, you can also find strong faculty who want to work with smart, interested students.

Yes, you want to believe that, you NEED to believe that... because no matter what, that's where your kid is.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, sorry to say but its very much a numbers game. If you are looking for high merit I would look at some of the good, but not tippy top, small private colleges. For example, My DD has UW 3.96 and got enough merit at St. Mary's of California to make it the same cost as ASU (that's our in-state). A 3.88UW is good, but it's not high enough to be a shoo-in for a merit award at a top school and, depending on your state, not a shoo-in for admission to a great in-state (looking at you, Virginia). Maybe start with the CTCL book and do the net price for some of those schools to give you a starting point.

OP just said a 3.88 GPA. No statement that it's unweighted.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If she's at a "good Public" as you say, then she probably does have a weighted GPA which you aren't telling us. Only the top 3 privates are unweighted. How many AP courses has she taken? What ECs does she have? How did she get so far in the system without an I.Q. test (schools do them routinely, as they do SOLs). What will her teacher recommendations say?

Yale picks kids with 4.8s, 1600 SATs, perfect SAT II subject matter tests (yes being phased out here but you can still take them abroad thru June of this year); national honors; huge community service like Eagle Scout; Team sports and school leadership positions which demonstrate your kid can get along with others and LEAD, which it sounds like she can't. That could be a real problem. What will her teachers say in their letters of recommendation? Will her counselor check off the "most rigorous" box?

Yale accepted Naomi Wolf.

I would like you to all take a look at her twitter feed lately and get back to me about their intellectual rigor.

Anonymous wrote:In addition to finding good schools that are pretty far down in the rankings, you can also find strong faculty who want to work with smart, interested students.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think OP would be best served by trying to adjust what is an "elite" college. I went to a LAC that ranks in the 40s on the USNWR liberal arts college rankings. They give tons of merit aid (I had a full tuition scholarship), have good honors programs, and send some people on to great grad schools. You can find schools like that where the cost will be competitive with, or better than, state schools for a student like this (a good SAT would have helped in the past, but I guess not right now). These places can be engaging environments for bright students who are looking for that, and most classes are discussion driven and small.

Strong state schools can be like that, too, there's just more people to sort through to find the ones to engage with. And it will take longer to get to the smaller, discussion classes.

But you have think beyond HYP, or Amherst, Swarthmore, Williams, etc. That's okay. There are plenty of good schools out there.

Sounds like a great place to be. Mind sharing the name of the school? How did this experience help you with your career PP, and what do you do for a living now?