My boys are 21 and 19. They workout and are bulking. They eat 4500 calories a day. They eat a lot. They would NEVER order that much food when someone is paying. They would order one meal and they purposely dont overeat when someone else is paying. They also never take the last piece of anything without asking if someone else wants it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Rich? Is the kid from a rich family? I housed some boys from NYC and Connecticut, and if we stopped by even Burger King this one kid would order three meals!
Knowing that I had cooked dinner as well, but teen athletes so I was trying to make sure they were full. He had money from parents a ton of money, and he knew we were not that well off based on our house! Never one offered to pay for his own.

Np this seems more something a kid from a lower class family would do. At least that’s what I’ve seen. Rich kids have always had excellent manners

I will say that it’s awkward being a guest and wanting more. You offer to pay but the hosts don’t let you.

You are gross and trashy.

New postet here. That's true though. Poor people are way mote excited by a take out meal and go hog wild.

The bf is picking up on signals from your daughter who he considers his host. I would have a frank discussion with her. She is responsible for her guest, and you are paying. She should have some grace and refrain from suggesting those appetizer and cinnamon pull ad ons on days when you are already paying for her bf and already paying extra. What she is doing to you as parents is inconsiderate, too.

If he shows up on a day you were planning to have leftovers or had exactly enough food for your nuclear family, then let DD and her BF fend for themselves sometimes instead of ordering takeout for everyone. They can get their own Taco Bell (and, as a bonus, you don't have to eat Taco Bell).

My college aged kids don't expect me to provide all their meals when they're home. We're empty nesters now - we can't be bothered to organize dinner every night! That's not to say that I won't order takeout for everyone, I just wouldn't do it as often as OP does. And when I do it, I don't really notice what a kid's friend ordered or didn't order.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, answer the question:

Why are you still gossiping about him when you have been given advice and even scripts about how to handle this, directly, once and for all?

Why are you still reading? OP was answering questions; you, on the other hand, have no such excuse.

No, actually,mOP has failed to answer this very simple question. Which is VERY telling.

Wait what question- why am I gossiping? Ummm I’m not? (Please google definition of gossip before replying thx)

You allegedly asked for a solution for him ordering out of bounds of what you deem acceptable.

The solutions and even scripts have been provided to you. Yet you do not acknowledge those solutions; you simply bash this young man, and seem to want everyone to join you in saying he is rude and clueless.

My question is: why? You have a solution. Why are you not simply implementing it, and moving on?

This.

High school and college boys eat a TON. This is especially true if they are active and/or athletes. The difference between what my daughter and son can eat is incredible.

I wouldn't judge him for the quantity of the meal but adding on appetizer and dessert is simply bad manners, as would ordering the most expensive item on the menu.

Be honest with your daughter about what's going on and host less often.

Y’all are gross for even ingesting Taco Bell! I would cook more often OP.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The Taco Bell party pack is killing me LOL! Who does that? And does he ever eat at his own home?

It’s just 4 tacos and 4 small burritos. For two people to share not a big deal at all..? And the other two items OP mentioned are dollar menu items. Maybe I am disgusting but I eat a bunch of items when I go to Taco Bell and I’m a normal sized woman.

Just!?!

Anonymous wrote:The Taco Bell party pack is killing me LOL! Who does that? And does he ever eat at his own home?

That one was very odd to me also, but it strikes me as an outlier from the other examples OP gave. To the point where I wonder if it was a misunderstanding and he thought that he was suggesting the party pack to be shared.

If it is truly a financial burden, just tell your DD that you can’t afford to feed her bf this often and suggest that they go to bf’s parents’ house for meals more often.

Anonymous wrote:The Taco Bell party pack is killing me LOL! Who does that? And does he ever eat at his own home?

It’s just 4 tacos and 4 small burritos. For two people to share not a big deal at all..? And the other two items OP mentioned are dollar menu items. Maybe I am disgusting but I eat a bunch of items when I go to Taco Bell and I’m a normal sized woman.

Anonymous wrote:It’s a but rude but he’s young. You shouldn’t be ordering takeout with a guest unless you can I begrudgingly let him order what he wants, though.

Agreed, unless you set clear parameters beforehand that apply to everybody ordering. And maybe keep some frozen TJ appetizery things and desserts on-hand.

The Taco Bell party pack is killing me LOL! Who does that? And does he ever eat at his own home?

OP the tone of these answer is harsh, but the substance is correct. The best course of action is to be a gracious, understanding host while still setting appropriate boundaries. Try not to get defensive about it. If you want commiseration, I’m sure that it was a frustrating surprise. That’s a normal reaction. But now you need to just take the advice given here and apply it in the figure.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, answer the question:

Why are you still gossiping about him when you have been given advice and even scripts about how to handle this, directly, once and for all?

Why are you still reading? OP was answering questions; you, on the other hand, have no such excuse.

No, actually,mOP has failed to answer this very simple question. Which is VERY telling.

Wait what question- why am I gossiping? Ummm I’m not? (Please google definition of gossip before replying thx)

You allegedly asked for a solution for him ordering out of bounds of what you deem acceptable.

The solutions and even scripts have been provided to you. Yet you do not acknowledge those solutions; you simply bash this young man, and seem to want everyone to join you in saying he is rude and clueless.

My question is: why? You have a solution. Why are you not simply implementing it, and moving on?