ManHere wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I saw a bit on 60 minutes a while ago where they had a panel of AAs and they were talking about being teased in school if they did well as "acting white".

Is that true or have you experienced that?

OP here. You get teased in school for a lot of things. This wasn't one of the things that I stressed about. I'd rather be teased by my schoolmates than punished by my parents for being a knucklehead. I got over it.

Amen brother. I didn't answer to the kids on the playground, I answered to my parents.

Anonymous wrote:I saw a bit on 60 minutes a while ago where they had a panel of AAs and they were talking about being teased in school if they did well as "acting white".

Is that true or have you experienced that?

OP here. You get teased in school for a lot of things. This wasn't one of the things that I stressed about. I'd rather be teased by my schoolmates than punished by my parents for being a knucklehead. I got over it.

Anonymous wrote:I just answered this question the white people thread so I'm curious:

What do you think about HBCUs?

OP here. I have the same opinion about HBCUs that I have on all womens, majority jewish, catholic, etc. colleges. It's a choice. For HBCUs, the H is for historical and most have a approx. 10% white enrollment. The H could also be used for schools like U of Alabama. It was historically white (no blacks allowed). I don't think you need to get rid of HBCUs just because all schools now have open enrollment for all races. My background: I went to a major public university for undergrad and an Ivy League school for my MBA. My brother went to an HBCU and had a great experience. We are both doing well in our careers. I also went to grad school with many HBCU grads and they had no problems. It's just a choice in where to get your education.

Anonymous wrote:I saw a bit on 60 minutes a while ago where they had a panel of AAs and they were talking about being teased in school if they did well as "acting white".

Is that true or have you experienced that?

I experienced this a lot growing up. In college, people were still making comments including my roomies. It was worse in middle school, less in high school, returned in college.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do so many come across as unpleasant? Yes, we all have bad days but generally speaking, I don't encounter very many pleasant expressions. Conversely, my showing courteousness has been perceived as being phony. What gives?

I think you're confusing unpleasant with faux friendliness. I will smile at others if they smile at me, but I don't usually begin the exchange (unless there's a cute baby or scene taking place).

Also, I've been told that I look "mad" on more than one occasion (usually by some flirting man). But I'm not mad nor am I frowning...it's more likely than I'm thinking about or concentrating on something. I don't want around with a smile on my face.

While being friendly is not fake, being overly "cheerleader"-like can be annoying and can off as fake. While you may think some black people need to lighten up, I think that some white people need to tone it down.

This is me as well. Also I've found that this area isn't very Friendly Chatter supportive. When I visit my in laws down south, I'm always shocked that people smile at you and say Good Day just walking down the street and won't hesitate to chat you up at the park. I don't walk around smiling, and I was never big on small talk, but I make an effort if someone is trying to engage me.

Anonymous wrote:I saw a bit on 60 minutes a while ago where they had a panel of AAs and they were talking about being teased in school if they did well as "acting white".

Is that true or have you experienced that?

This is overplayed. People don't say that much anymore. Plus, not really sure why only blacks are accused of harassing smart people. There are MANY white kids that are teased for being nerds.

I was smart in school and was never teased. The kids that were teased were geeks (and they weren't always smart). I would wager that folks who were accused of "acting white" were Carlton (from the Fresh Prince of Bel Air) type black kids. In these instances white=yuppy, preppy, bourgeois, etc.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do so many come across as unpleasant? Yes, we all have bad days but generally speaking, I don't encounter very many pleasant expressions. Conversely, my showing courteousness has been perceived as being phony. What gives?

AA here, a lot of AA are working jobs that they hate and usually these jobs are not careers but strictly for the check. Sometimes these jobs are service oriented. (Side note: I worked in the Gov't for years and I have encountered some really unfriendly AA's and people who are non-Black probably assume these people treat AA better, they don't). They are the same with AA as they are with non-AA. It is not just you, unfriendly people exist of all races though and if they are providing services as many minority groups do, you encounter the unfriendly ones more often.

I would also say that unfriendliness comes down to occupation. Most people in the service industry and certain levels of customer service are unfriendly and/or unpleasant and seem "put out" when you need help. Have been helped by many a rude and/or reluctant white "customer service" and/or front desk worker. If the job is low wage, chances are the attitude isn't going to be all sunshine and roses.

Anonymous wrote:Why do so many come across as unpleasant? Yes, we all have bad days but generally speaking, I don't encounter very many pleasant expressions. Conversely, my showing courteousness has been perceived as being phony. What gives?

AA here, a lot of AA are working jobs that they hate and usually these jobs are not careers but strictly for the check. Sometimes these jobs are service oriented. (Side note: I worked in the Gov't for years and I have encountered some really unfriendly AA's and people who are non-Black probably assume these people treat AA better, they don't). They are the same with AA as they are with non-AA. It is not just you, unfriendly people exist of all races though and if they are providing services as many minority groups do, you encounter the unfriendly ones more often.

I saw a bit on 60 minutes a while ago where they had a panel of AAs and they were talking about being teased in school if they did well as "acting white".

Is that true or have you experienced that?

Anonymous wrote:I just answered this question the white people thread so I'm curious:

What do you think about HBCUs?

Don't particularly like them. Seem very high-school'ish to me. I won't allow my children to attend them. Some seem more serious than others.

Anonymous wrote:I'd like to re-ask an earlier question: How do you think we can encourage more ambitious AA students to pursue STEM careers (versus Medicine, Law, Banking, etc.)? I can't cite the statistics, although I believe I've read studies that support this, but my impression is that AAs (along with women) are underrepresented in the field.

I will address this question and not your former to avoid duplicate answers.

I was interested in law school, but ultimately didn't pursue it. Some of the drawbacks included: long hours and cost to attend. Not interested in having huge debt and working 60+ hour weeks. The "race to partner" does not appeal to me at all. If I ever practiced law, it would be family law and/or something dealing with civil rights.

My daughter (who is 16 and will be a senior next year) is interested in medicine. She was interested in being a doctor but decided against it because she's afraid of having the responsibility of someone's life in her hands, so to speak. She also didn't want a career that she felt would sacrifice having a family. She's decided to pursue being a physician assistant instead.

I just answered this question the white people thread so I'm curious:

What do you think about HBCUs?

Anonymous wrote:Why do so many come across as unpleasant? Yes, we all have bad days but generally speaking, I don't encounter very many pleasant expressions. Conversely, my showing courteousness has been perceived as being phony. What gives?

I think you're confusing unpleasant with faux friendliness. I will smile at others if they smile at me, but I don't usually begin the exchange (unless there's a cute baby or scene taking place).

Also, I've been told that I look "mad" on more than one occasion (usually by some flirting man). But I'm not mad nor am I frowning...it's more likely than I'm thinking about or concentrating on something. I don't want around with a smile on my face.

While being friendly is not fake, being overly "cheerleader"-like can be annoying and can off as fake. While you may think some black people need to lighten up, I think that some white people need to tone it down.

Anonymous wrote:Are AA's more fearful to try new things in general?

Depends on what it is. But in my experience, yes. I don't have a driving need for adventure.Not a thrill seeker at all (except roller coasters).

I'd like to re-ask an earlier question: How do you think we can encourage more ambitious AA students to pursue STEM careers (versus Medicine, Law, Banking, etc.)? I can't cite the statistics, although I believe I've read studies that support this, but my impression is that AAs (along with women) are underrepresented in the field.