Anonymous wrote:I don't do bjs. EVER.

And men everywhere thank you for that.

Womyn are hysterical!

I don't do bjs. EVER.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I told my husband explicitly what I wanted several weeks ago. We also discussed our Father’s Day plans in the same discussion.

I would love for him to intuit that I need to sleep in, want breakfast from this particular bakery, and want it delivered to me in bed before we go to see my sister and her children, then he takes off with our kids to see his mother while I relax with my sister. But it’s really unlikely that he’ll do so and frankly I’m in my 30s and don’t need to settle for some kind of half-assery, so my make my wishes known up front.

Why? Why on earth would you expect that he would know the exact thing you want to do for Mother's Day? Do you know exactly what he wants to do for Father's Day? Why wouldn't you be willing to be clear about what you want rather than expecting someone to read your mind and then be upset when they do it wrong? It's like you people are setting your husbands up to fail a test or something.

I know exactly what my husband wants for Father’s Day: Golf with our teen sons, grilling outside, and a bj later that night.
I can also tell you what every woman wants for Mother’s Day: something cute from the kids, a meal that she doesn’t have to prepare, a card with something nice written in it, and some time alone to relax.

None of this is hard.

I can also tell you that my husband does NOT want me to come to him the Saturday before Father’s Day and ask him to plan the day out.

So the bj is by whom?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband 5 minutes ago: "I was thinking that in order to avoid the Mother's Day crowds, we should go out to dinner tonight, wherever you want to go" and then walks upstairs to take a nap. IT IS SATURDAY AFTERNOON AND YOU ARE ASKING ME TO PLAN MY OWN MOTHER'S DAY DINNER FOR THIS EVENING? I want to cry.

What exactly did you need him to do? He said you can eat wherever you want, so aren't you going to just...go there? Or you're saying you need a reservation, so he should have waited to find out where you wanted to go and then made the reservation before taking a nap?

He should have had the plan in place before telling PP that "he was thinking" about maybe doing something that would require her to do any work.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My complaint is that I have a mother figure who is probably expecting something. Every year it’s agony because she doesn’t live close by, she has her own family (who are hopefully taking her out so lunch is not an option), I’ve never sent anyone flowers so I don’t know how to do this and trying to make myself research it is too much. I’ve sent her a card on Thursday. I hope it gets there on time.

Holidays are my curse because I don’t like them, I only remotely like new years but that’s it.

How did you make it to adulthood? You can order flowers in 10 minutes online.

This learned helplessness is absurd. Google "how to send flowers" and you'll be an instant expert.

Guys - if you are married to someone who cares about Mother's Day, then do something that will make them happy and feel appreciated. If you are married to someone who's cool sending themselves flowers, then keep not doing anything. It's pretty easy.

This is what kills me. It is not hard to make most people happy! Just be a little bit considerate. Make the da** dinner reservation if that matters to them. Buy them some effin flowers if they care about it. Why be a helpless d**k about it? Yes if your partner is a completely unreasonable psycho who insists you hire a private helicopter to ferry her to Paris and you guys are struggling to pay the electric bill, you may disappoint. But most people are pretty normal. Most people just want to have something done to make them feel a little special.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I told my husband explicitly what I wanted several weeks ago. We also discussed our Father’s Day plans in the same discussion.

I would love for him to intuit that I need to sleep in, want breakfast from this particular bakery, and want it delivered to me in bed before we go to see my sister and her children, then he takes off with our kids to see his mother while I relax with my sister. But it’s really unlikely that he’ll do so and frankly I’m in my 30s and don’t need to settle for some kind of half-assery, so my make my wishes known up front.

Why? Why on earth would you expect that he would know the exact thing you want to do for Mother's Day? Do you know exactly what he wants to do for Father's Day? Why wouldn't you be willing to be clear about what you want rather than expecting someone to read your mind and then be upset when they do it wrong? It's like you people are setting your husbands up to fail a test or something.

I know exactly what my husband wants for Father’s Day: Golf with our teen sons, grilling outside, and a bj later that night.
I can also tell you what every woman wants for Mother’s Day: something cute from the kids, a meal that she doesn’t have to prepare, a card with something nice written in it, and some time alone to relax.

None of this is hard.

I can also tell you that my husband does NOT want me to come to him the Saturday before Father’s Day and ask him to plan the day out.

Sheesh, women cannot win. If we spell out exactly what we want, we're being too controlling and defeating the purpose of having people show us appreciation. If we don't speak up and trust DH and/or kids to handle it themselves and they drop the ball, then it's our fault for not using our words and expecting people to be mind readers.

Anonymous wrote:I told my husband explicitly what I wanted several weeks ago. We also discussed our Father’s Day plans in the same discussion.

I would love for him to intuit that I need to sleep in, want breakfast from this particular bakery, and want it delivered to me in bed before we go to see my sister and her children, then he takes off with our kids to see his mother while I relax with my sister. But it’s really unlikely that he’ll do so and frankly I’m in my 30s and don’t need to settle for some kind of half-assery, so my make my wishes known up front.

Why? Why on earth would you expect that he would know the exact thing you want to do for Mother's Day? Do you know exactly what he wants to do for Father's Day? Why wouldn't you be willing to be clear about what you want rather than expecting someone to read your mind and then be upset when they do it wrong? It's like you people are setting your husbands up to fail a test or something.

Anonymous wrote:My husband 5 minutes ago: "I was thinking that in order to avoid the Mother's Day crowds, we should go out to dinner tonight, wherever you want to go" and then walks upstairs to take a nap. IT IS SATURDAY AFTERNOON AND YOU ARE ASKING ME TO PLAN MY OWN MOTHER'S DAY DINNER FOR THIS EVENING? I want to cry.

What exactly did you need him to do? He said you can eat wherever you want, so aren't you going to just...go there? Or you're saying you need a reservation, so he should have waited to find out where you wanted to go and then made the reservation before taking a nap?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My complaint is that I have a mother figure who is probably expecting something. Every year it’s agony because she doesn’t live close by, she has her own family (who are hopefully taking her out so lunch is not an option), I’ve never sent anyone flowers so I don’t know how to do this and trying to make myself research it is too much. I’ve sent her a card on Thursday. I hope it gets there on time.

Holidays are my curse because I don’t like them, I only remotely like new years but that’s it.

How did you make it to adulthood? You can order flowers in 10 minutes online.

Tell me about it. If you can order something on Amazon, you can order flowers. I guess if you have never used the Internet before in your life (which is not true because you posted on DCUM)...maybe that's an excuse.

Here is a hint...order from any number of websites with Flowers or Florist in the domain name.

Anonymous wrote:This will be my first mother's day posy divorce. Should I expect something from my ex? I have the kids tomorrow. I am currently dating and he is single still. I just hope he helped the kids plan something for me.

Sadly, no.

Anonymous wrote:My complaint is that I have a mother figure who is probably expecting something. Every year it’s agony because she doesn’t live close by, she has her own family (who are hopefully taking her out so lunch is not an option), I’ve never sent anyone flowers so I don’t know how to do this and trying to make myself research it is too much. I’ve sent her a card on Thursday. I hope it gets there on time.

Holidays are my curse because I don’t like them, I only remotely like new years but that’s it.

How did you make it to adulthood? You can order flowers in 10 minutes online.

Anonymous wrote:The bitterness and resentment are overflowing on this thread. Gross.

why are you on the dcum relationships board if you find bitterness and resentment gross?
what did you think it would be? endless buzzfeed style listicles like '10 things I love about hubby?'

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:i think the people who dont expect anything and send themselves flowers or direct everyone in a really controlling way are the weird ones.

Like - mothers day is supposed to be a day for others to show appreciation for you. why send yourself flowers? I mean, sure, buy yourself flowers whenever. but sending yourself flowers on mothers day signed by your husband (who didn't actually do it) and then castigating others for not being mature is... it's very odd behavior.

I thought the flowers thing was a joke, was that pp serious?!

A lot of the people in the comments have gotten very accustomed to being married to deeply inconsiderate people, it seems.

Quiet the opposite. They are married to a considerate husband who treat them well every single day.

ok but they are a psycho