Anonymous
08/27/2023 10:20
Subject: Preschool vs Daycare Wars
Anonymous wrote:This thread explains so much. I had the most confusing conversation with someone a while back where I mentioned my kid was in preschool but then went on to say I needed to find childcare as I was returning to work. The mom kept saying she managed to work full time and just use preschool and was saying things like “you just have to manage your time wisely”. It was a short convo so I just nodded by head and smiled but was so confused as to how she was working F/T with 10 hours of daycare as childcare. She must have thought by preschool I was referring to full time childcare.
Anyway, I can’t believe this is a controversial topic, I personally call my kids center daycare to others but school to the kids. It’s a daycare with preschool/educational programming for the 3+ crowd.
This thread brought me some clarity on a weird situation too. It has been a while but I remember an in law cousin asking about what the kids do (I sahm so you know everyone wants accounting of your hours) and I said they were going to preschool and she said "you mean daycare" and I was like ugh, I guess some people are just insufferable and don't think preschool counts as real school. It was part of the name and 9-1. There was only a few sahms but mostly work at home parents, nannies or grandparents at pick up. She wondered what I did with all that free time and I chalked that up to resentment. Now I think there was more nuance than my assuming she didn't know about the benefits of preschool.
Despite hours, it makes sense to call daycare preschool after a certain age. If a daycare isn't teaching age appropriate things like manners, shapes, ABCs, numbers... I doubt they would stay in business and it makes sense for the kids to call it preschool to differentiate learning expectations and give them a sense of leveling up as a step towards school. I never once had anyone in town dispute or debate the labeling of daycare or preschool so I think it may be a contention in very different circles and I just happened to come across one of them at a family event.
Anonymous
08/27/2023 07:57
Subject: Preschool vs Daycare Wars
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I would never correct someone in real life but I do always have the fleeting thought that it’s a bit pathetic when parents of daycare-age kids call it “school.” Makes me think they are in denial about sending kids to daycare, which I think is ridiculous because I fully support women working. It’s just the dishonesty that bothers me.
Whatever makes you feel better/superior about being a stay at home mom...
I work and dont feel strongly about this (you can call your childcare situation whatever feels best for you) but I would feel a little silly telling people my one year old goes to school. They go to daycare and likely will until they go to elementary school
I think you are missing the point of this post, PP. We are talking about kids in preschool.
I view daycare, even with educational programming, as daycare. It is full time childcare, unlike preschool.
I do understand that some people feel more comfortable with the words “school” or “preschool” than they do with “daycare”, I’m just not one of them.
So instead you use a term that child care professionals specifically identify as inappropriate?
Anonymous
08/27/2023 06:54
Subject: Preschool vs Daycare Wars
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I think you're all ignoring that there is an abundance (at least where I live) of accredited full-day preschools that start at age 2 or 2.5. Most are play-based/reggio Emilia/montessori until pre-k4, but they are preschools with preschool curricula nonetheless.
Both of my children were prepared to Kindergarten when they got there (e.g. knew their letters/numbers/a lot of CAC words and obviously knew all the social things they needed to know like standing in line, interacting with peers, no hitting/grabbing, how to zip/unzip their coats, how to unpack and repack their lunch boxes, etc.).
I'm not sure why this causes SAHMs who send their children to half-day programs to learn these things so much stress.
I think this is what is so bizarre to me about this whole conversation. My kids each went to daycare for a couple years then to a full day preschool program, each at a place with “school” or “preschool” in the name. I looked at many different programs and nearly all of them offered full day programs. Some, including the ones I picked, had options for half days. At the first school it was about half and half full day/half day. The second the half day kids were a serious minority. Several families had supplementary childcare of various forms even if they used the full day program (grandparents, au pair). In both cases there was an aftercare but I didn’t think it was great and was thankful that I could pick my kids up at the end of the school day (which aligned with the end of the school day for my older child in elementary school). Around where I live (in the DMV) that appears to be the norm for preschool and anyone who is confused and astonished that preschool can be more than 5 hours a week has never interacted with an actual preschool family.
The idea that I’m supposed to call that daycare (despite the program name) because I work while they are there is crazy. Similarly I called the daycare by the name and “school “ interchangeably not because I cared but because that was the language the daycare used. Same for teachers vs. daycare worker.
I posted earlier that I couldn’t believe people care about this and I am so shocked this whole thing is still going. I teach my kids that there’s no one rule for what we call people (I’m not strict about Mrs. And Mr.), we call people what they introduce themselves as or we ask them what they like to be called. This is the same thing to me as long as it’s remotely truthful.
You’re surprised this thread is still going and yet you post this multi paragraph nonsense at 6:30 am. Got it, hypocrite.
Anonymous
08/27/2023 06:23
Subject: Preschool vs Daycare Wars
Anonymous wrote:I think you're all ignoring that there is an abundance (at least where I live) of accredited full-day preschools that start at age 2 or 2.5. Most are play-based/reggio Emilia/montessori until pre-k4, but they are preschools with preschool curricula nonetheless.
Both of my children were prepared to Kindergarten when they got there (e.g. knew their letters/numbers/a lot of CAC words and obviously knew all the social things they needed to know like standing in line, interacting with peers, no hitting/grabbing, how to zip/unzip their coats, how to unpack and repack their lunch boxes, etc.).
I'm not sure why this causes SAHMs who send their children to half-day programs to learn these things so much stress.
I think this is what is so bizarre to me about this whole conversation. My kids each went to daycare for a couple years then to a full day preschool program, each at a place with “school” or “preschool” in the name. I looked at many different programs and nearly all of them offered full day programs. Some, including the ones I picked, had options for half days. At the first school it was about half and half full day/half day. The second the half day kids were a serious minority. Several families had supplementary childcare of various forms even if they used the full day program (grandparents, au pair). In both cases there was an aftercare but I didn’t think it was great and was thankful that I could pick my kids up at the end of the school day (which aligned with the end of the school day for my older child in elementary school). Around where I live (in the DMV) that appears to be the norm for preschool and anyone who is confused and astonished that preschool can be more than 5 hours a week has never interacted with an actual preschool family.
The idea that I’m supposed to call that daycare (despite the program name) because I work while they are there is crazy. Similarly I called the daycare by the name and “school “ interchangeably not because I cared but because that was the language the daycare used. Same for teachers vs. daycare worker.
I posted earlier that I couldn’t believe people care about this and I am so shocked this whole thing is still going. I teach my kids that there’s no one rule for what we call people (I’m not strict about Mrs. And Mr.), we call people what they introduce themselves as or we ask them what they like to be called. This is the same thing to me as long as it’s remotely truthful.
Anonymous
08/27/2023 01:45
Subject: Preschool vs Daycare Wars
Nobody with half a brain would waste time arguing either side of this topic on DCUM or anywhere else, much less posting multiple times on the same page as some are doing, attacking anyone who dares disagree with them.
Anonymous
08/27/2023 01:39
Subject: Re:Preschool vs Daycare Wars
Nobody worth knowing cares even the tiniest little bit about this.
Anonymous
08/27/2023 01:36
Subject: Preschool vs Daycare Wars
Anonymous wrote:I have an opinion on this which I will keep to myself since it is pointless to post it here, nobody is changing their mind.
That said, it appears to me that those who call daycare school are way more dogmatic about their belief than those who object to that. I don't really get why any of you want to participate in the so-called mommy war described in this thread.
I think it's just a few unhinged posters. They seem to always come out when the threads get long. Most people who call it school probably don't care that much about it either.
Anonymous
08/27/2023 01:24
Subject: Re:Preschool vs Daycare Wars
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Daycare is for childcare, preschool is for enrichment.
My kids go to an accredited preschool at a daycare center. What does that count as, in your mind?
Np. Before this thread I would have called it daycare but I genuinely didn’t know that daycare was a bad word. Planning steering clear of it now as I wouldn’t want to unintentionally offend someone!
The only people that think it's a bad word are stay at home moms who are trying to make working moms feel bad about their choices. Newsflash: I don't. I have older kids now who are thriving. They went to full day preschool that was accredited and certified by both the state and the NAEYC. It was a real preschool. The also provided full day care for the children. Stay at home moms who want to argue that this means it wasn't a real preschool can kiss my ass.
Well I mean you also obviously feel some type of way…
I wouldn’t assume someone is trying to offend if they use the term daycare, they may not be aware the semantics carry a lot of baggage for some people
Working parents whose daycares or sitters don't call themselves preschools also side-eye the term.
Right, there is the scary lady up above who must be a nightmare to nanny for.
Anonymous
08/27/2023 00:17
Subject: Re:Preschool vs Daycare Wars
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Daycare is for childcare, preschool is for enrichment.
My kids go to an accredited preschool at a daycare center. What does that count as, in your mind?
Np. Before this thread I would have called it daycare but I genuinely didn’t know that daycare was a bad word. Planning steering clear of it now as I wouldn’t want to unintentionally offend someone!
The only people that think it's a bad word are stay at home moms who are trying to make working moms feel bad about their choices. Newsflash: I don't. I have older kids now who are thriving. They went to full day preschool that was accredited and certified by both the state and the NAEYC. It was a real preschool. The also provided full day care for the children. Stay at home moms who want to argue that this means it wasn't a real preschool can kiss my ass.
Well I mean you also obviously feel some type of way…
I wouldn’t assume someone is trying to offend if they use the term daycare, they may not be aware the semantics carry a lot of baggage for some people
Working parents whose daycares or sitters don't call themselves preschools also side-eye the term.
Anonymous
08/27/2023 00:14
Subject: Preschool vs Daycare Wars
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Btw nanny shares are unlicensed daycares, no thanks.
How is a nanny watching 2 babies from 2 families that much different than twins from 1 family? And all nannies are unlicensed childcare. Your clever little quip makes no sense.
It's very different. If you use a nanny share but are not the host, you are trusting that the other house is a safe environment for the child. You don't control who has access to it or the extent to which it is childproofed. If you are the host, can you imagine what happens if the other child gets seriously hurt? Of course, injuries and mishaps can happen everywhere, but licensed daycares do have to meet a certain standard as to safety.
Anonymous
08/27/2023 00:11
Subject: Re:Preschool vs Daycare Wars
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Daycare is for childcare, preschool is for enrichment.
My kids go to an accredited preschool at a daycare center. What does that count as, in your mind?
Np. Before this thread I would have called it daycare but I genuinely didn’t know that daycare was a bad word. Planning steering clear of it now as I wouldn’t want to unintentionally offend someone!
The only people that think it's a bad word are stay at home moms who are trying to make working moms feel bad about their choices. Newsflash: I don't. I have older kids now who are thriving. They went to full day preschool that was accredited and certified by both the state and the NAEYC. It was a real preschool. The also provided full day care for the children. Stay at home moms who want to argue that this means it wasn't a real preschool can kiss my ass.
Well I mean you also obviously feel some type of way…
I wouldn’t assume someone is trying to offend if they use the term daycare, they may not be aware the semantics carry a lot of baggage for some people
You’re the one freaking out and bolding things for emphasis. Why wouldn’t a NAEYC preschool be a preschool in your mind?
Anonymous
08/27/2023 00:07
Subject: Preschool vs Daycare Wars
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I would never correct someone in real life but I do always have the fleeting thought that it’s a bit pathetic when parents of daycare-age kids call it “school.” Makes me think they are in denial about sending kids to daycare, which I think is ridiculous because I fully support women working. It’s just the dishonesty that bothers me.
Whatever makes you feel better/superior about being a stay at home mom...
I work and dont feel strongly about this (you can call your childcare situation whatever feels best for you) but I would feel a little silly telling people my one year old goes to school. They go to daycare and likely will until they go to elementary school
I think you are missing the point of this post, PP. We are talking about kids in preschool.
I view daycare, even with educational programming, as daycare. It is full time childcare, unlike preschool.
I do understand that some people feel more comfortable with the words “school” or “preschool” than they do with “daycare”, I’m just not one of them.
Anonymous
08/27/2023 00:05
Subject: Re:Preschool vs Daycare Wars
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Daycare is for childcare, preschool is for enrichment.
My kids go to an accredited preschool at a daycare center. What does that count as, in your mind?
Np. Before this thread I would have called it daycare but I genuinely didn’t know that daycare was a bad word. Planning steering clear of it now as I wouldn’t want to unintentionally offend someone!
The only people that think it's a bad word are stay at home moms who are trying to make working moms feel bad about their choices. Newsflash: I don't. I have older kids now who are thriving. They went to full day preschool that was accredited and certified by both the state and the NAEYC. It was a real preschool. The also provided full day care for the children. Stay at home moms who want to argue that this means it wasn't a real preschool can kiss my ass.
Well I mean you also obviously feel some type of way…
I wouldn’t assume someone is trying to offend if they use the term daycare, they may not be aware the semantics carry a lot of baggage for some people
This entire thread is about how stay at home moms get offended by people calling full day preschools "preschool" instead of daycare, so yeah, they're aware.
Anonymous
08/27/2023 00:01
Subject: Preschool vs Daycare Wars
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I would never correct someone in real life but I do always have the fleeting thought that it’s a bit pathetic when parents of daycare-age kids call it “school.” Makes me think they are in denial about sending kids to daycare, which I think is ridiculous because I fully support women working. It’s just the dishonesty that bothers me.
Whatever makes you feel better/superior about being a stay at home mom...
I work and dont feel strongly about this (you can call your childcare situation whatever feels best for you) but I would feel a little silly telling people my one year old goes to school. They go to daycare and likely will until they go to elementary school
I think you are missing the point of this post, PP. We are talking about kids in preschool.
Anonymous
08/26/2023 23:54
Subject: Re:Preschool vs Daycare Wars
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Daycare is for childcare, preschool is for enrichment.
My kids go to an accredited preschool at a daycare center. What does that count as, in your mind?
Np. Before this thread I would have called it daycare but I genuinely didn’t know that daycare was a bad word. Planning steering clear of it now as I wouldn’t want to unintentionally offend someone!
The only people that think it's a bad word are stay at home moms who are trying to make working moms feel bad about their choices. Newsflash: I don't. I have older kids now who are thriving. They went to full day preschool that was accredited and certified by both the state and the NAEYC. It was a real preschool. The also provided full day care for the children. Stay at home moms who want to argue that this means it wasn't a real preschool can kiss my ass.
Well I mean you also obviously feel some type of way…
I wouldn’t assume someone is trying to offend if they use the term daycare, they may not be aware the semantics carry a lot of baggage for some people