Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Suicide or OD 90% of the time. If it was a natural 'suddenly' (ie stroke or heart attack) it's usually spelled out to avoid the implications of the aforementioned causes.

Nope. A friend's aunt died last week by choking to death in her home. She was eating and was alone. It was unexpected. Period. MYOB.

And if they don’t want people whispering about if she had a drug problem or not, they should say she died suddenly of natural causes.

NP. Let the whispers commence. And then let the weeding of the “friends” and trusted family commence. Feel free to show your true colors. We will move accordingly. Trash will reveal itself.

DP, but you’re sooooo oversensitive about this. Take a pill.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. I guess seeing someone retire early from a very lucrative position at such an early age makes me wonder if "retired" = "fired" because of a some mental or addiction problem, followed by suicide or OD soon thereafter.

This is disgusting. You are officially a bad person, OP. Try to retrain all of the emotional energy you’re spending on this to thinking about this person’s life and sending comforting thoughts to their family.

don't attack them, that's just their take, different to your own

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. I guess seeing someone retire early from a very lucrative position at such an early age makes me wonder if "retired" = "fired" because of a some mental or addiction problem, followed by suicide or OD soon thereafter.

This is disgusting. You are officially a bad person, OP. Try to retrain all of the emotional energy you’re spending on this to thinking about this person’s life and sending comforting thoughts to their family.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I cannot imagine myself going beyond “x passed…” It would not occur to me to mention the cause of death because I don't think it is important.

The people to whom this may be important already know or can easily reach out to ask.

Now, I mean…. I see why it’s not my business and I wouldn’t ever pry or ask the family of course. But to not be curious why someone relatively young died unexpectedly? Like, aortic aneurysm vs drug overdose? I am always so curious as to the cause when I see an old college acquaintance “died unexpectedly” on Facebook at age 39 and I think it’s weird to not even care what they died from!

No, not in the least bit curious. It doesn't make the person less dead. It's anecdata. Completely useless to me.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. I guess seeing someone retire early from a very lucrative position at such an early age makes me wonder if "retired" = "fired" because of a some mental or addiction problem, followed by suicide or OD soon thereafter.

You have an interesting bias in life. I would assume that the person was diagnosed with something terminal and decided to make his remaining time as meaningful as possible while he could, but the disease progressed much faster than expected.

Usually the obit will say “died after a short battle with illness” or similar

Sometimes, not "usually."

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Suicide or OD 90% of the time. If it was a natural 'suddenly' (ie stroke or heart attack) it's usually spelled out to avoid the implications of the aforementioned causes.

This. If it's a heart attack, the obit will say heart attack

Not necessarily. My father died in expectantly at 74. He just didn't wake up. We don't know how he died and didn't need to explore whether it was a heart attack or a stoke, though either are likely.
Do I really owe YOU an explanation?

There are now obit AI bots. I know because I was looking for a friend's obit, and although the family had not yet written one (I learned later), there were three obits on line that were clearly using information scrubbed from the internet in what seemed like super random sources. I'd swear they somehow got into the persons's recommendation letters or workplace reviews. So, in the future anyway, if there is anything on line anywhere about the circumstances or cause of death, it may end up in a fake obit.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Suicide or OD 90% of the time. If it was a natural 'suddenly' (ie stroke or heart attack) it's usually spelled out to avoid the implications of the aforementioned causes.

Nope. A friend's aunt died last week by choking to death in her home. She was eating and was alone. It was unexpected. Period. MYOB.

And if they don’t want people whispering about if she had a drug problem or not, they should say she died suddenly of natural causes.

NP. Let the whispers commence. And then let the weeding of the “friends” and trusted family commence. Feel free to show your true colors. We will move accordingly. Trash will reveal itself.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I cannot imagine myself going beyond “x passed…” It would not occur to me to mention the cause of death because I don't think it is important.

The people to whom this may be important already know or can easily reach out to ask.

Now, I mean…. I see why it’s not my business and I wouldn’t ever pry or ask the family of course. But to not be curious why someone relatively young died unexpectedly? Like, aortic aneurysm vs drug overdose? I am always so curious as to the cause when I see an old college acquaintance “died unexpectedly” on Facebook at age 39 and I think it’s weird to not even care what they died from!

Oh, of course people will be curious. I have been very curious and TBH, kind of detest when people talk about their grieving, loss, etc without mentioning the reason for the death.

That said, it still wouldn’t occur to me to mention the cause of death of a loved one… I can’t imagine caring about people’s curiosity if I ever have to write an obituary notice for one of my children for instance.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Suicide or OD 90% of the time. If it was a natural 'suddenly' (ie stroke or heart attack) it's usually spelled out to avoid the implications of the aforementioned causes.

Nope. A friend's aunt died last week by choking to death in her home. She was eating and was alone. It was unexpected. Period. MYOB.

And if they don’t want people whispering about if she had a drug problem or not, they should say she died suddenly of natural causes.

Anonymous wrote:My old co-worker was standing too close to a curb and a bus side view mirror hit him in the head and killed him.

He died suddenly.

and his obit would likely say he died suddenly in a tragic accident. They wouldn’t open it up to gossip about if he died from drugs.

Anonymous wrote:I cannot imagine myself going beyond “x passed…” It would not occur to me to mention the cause of death because I don't think it is important.

The people to whom this may be important already know or can easily reach out to ask.

Now, I mean…. I see why it’s not my business and I wouldn’t ever pry or ask the family of course. But to not be curious why someone relatively young died unexpectedly? Like, aortic aneurysm vs drug overdose? I am always so curious as to the cause when I see an old college acquaintance “died unexpectedly” on Facebook at age 39 and I think it’s weird to not even care what they died from!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. I guess seeing someone retire early from a very lucrative position at such an early age makes me wonder if "retired" = "fired" because of a some mental or addiction problem, followed by suicide or OD soon thereafter.

You have an interesting bias in life. I would assume that the person was diagnosed with something terminal and decided to make his remaining time as meaningful as possible while he could, but the disease progressed much faster than expected.

Usually the obit will say “died after a short battle with illness” or similar

I cannot imagine myself going beyond “x passed…” It would not occur to me to mention the cause of death because I don't think it is important.

The people to whom this may be important already know or can easily reach out to ask.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had a family member OD. We simply said he died on XX date in the obit. No explanation, no suddenly. But we were very open about cause of death to those at funeral.

The internet (and every obit on it) is forever.

Exactly. If a person is into genealogy, these days they can look up the obit of a person who died 80 years ago. In the future, who knows how far back people will be able to look things up.