Anonymous wrote:That is way too much. I would leave. Weirdos.

You'd leave? People on DCUM amuse me. OP is the guest in this home and yes, MIL is being a fusspot but not nuts or OCD. If OP is this incensed to her core over this silly thing, OP is going to have one hell of a time when there's a baby and MIL (or, God forbid! DH himself, or anyone else remotely in OP's orbit) does something that gets on OP's apparently very easily upset nerves. OP seems to be a humor-free zone about this, which begs the question: About what else might she be so uptight?

MIL isn't demanding that OP wash all these glasses. MIL is being a neat freak, sure, but in her own home, and creating work for HERSELF, not for OP. But instead of rolling her eyes a bit and joking about it with DH and letting it go, OP has to make her water A Hill To Die On.

Before someone leaps in to yelp, "But! But but but what about the water bottle that is OP's ownnnn!" Yes, that was silly, but FFS, tell MIL once firmly, using your words like an adult: "Hey, I get that you worry about glasses being left around so that's why I brought in my bottle. Please don't move it or clean it -- I have a particular way of cleaning it and will do that myself. Just pretend it's invisible!" But nah, OP would rather be offended. .And again---MIL is not doing this at OP's own home. You can be a freak at your own place, and guests can leave if they want, but leaving over this? OP had better be ready to leave over every other quirk she encounters too. In fact, just send DH to see his folks solo from now on. OP must not find much to like in her MIL if this one ridiculous thing would be such a big deal to OP.

That is way too much. I would leave. Weirdos.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a neat freak and I hate clutter, but I would never clear a guest’s water glass (unless they have multiple glasses scattered around the house - my SIL does this) or go into their room and take their water bottle!

Does she “close the kitchen” too?

Thanks for that memory. I'm going to spend the rest of the day crying in the corner.

Just grab a delicious piece of fruit from the breakfast bar and EAT IT OUTSIDE!

On the stoop like THE DIRTY, CRUMBLY GIRl YOU ARE

Anonymous wrote:MIL is going to lose her mind when the baby comes. Is she going to empty out and wash the bottles?

MIL won’t have to worry about that if she keeps up her current behavior.

Keep your water bottle with you. Or tell her "I'll be right back, please don't move my water."
I almost always have water with me. I'm diabetic and very prone to UTI's.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ime the older generation doesn’t understand the constant need to drink water. I swear some of my family are really camels. 8 8oz glasses of water a day was a recommendation within the last 2ish decades and I think has been debunked.

Normally I’d say that they view you having a glass of water out as leaving a mess. But that doesn’t explain the water bottle. That just seems vindictive because it’s not in their line of site and it’s not like they are missing a glass that needs to be washed.

Needing to constantly drink water isn't good. Could be a sign of diabetes. Or in OPs case gestational diabetes.

I think it becomes a habit for people, not necessarily that they MUST have water because of a medical need.

But pregnant women do need more water than they would normally drink. It’s easy to become dehydrated when you’re pregnant.

But OP says to leave her cup there so she can refill. Sounds like she's leaving empty cups around. Which isn't really necessary. She's in a home with constant access to water. It's not hard to get a new cup and put the previous one in the sink when she's thirsty. There isn't a shortage of water or cups.

How do you know how many cups there are? OP isn’t intending to dirty multiple cups and “leave them around.” She is using ONE cup. As any guest may do in the home of any semi-decent host. She’s even trying to keep it out of the way in the guest bedroom.

From OP:
I asked them to please leave my water cups alone so I could refill, and they said “we don’t keep cups and glasses out.”

I assume you know that "cupS" implies more than one?

And I assume YOU know that:
1) It’s a multi-day visit (stated in the original post) so more than one day at this house = more than one cup will be used
2) Because they keep taking the one glass she is trying to keep, she has to get another one. Moron.

She has to get another one? Oh Lord. Sounds like torture. She will have to walk a few feet to take another tiny sip of water in a different glass.

Out of curiosity if someone was sitting in chair sipping water and they put the glass down (with water still in it) to get up to go to the bathroom. What would you do?

It depends on the person. If it's one of my kids I know they're not coming back to finish that drink. So I clean it up or put it in the fridge for later. They will also tell me "they aren't done yet" which is just a way of getting out of cleaning up after themselves. Only the in-laws know what OPs habits are and why are they responding the way they are.

NP. Same question, but it’s an adult houseguest. Let’s say it was cocktail hour before a dinner party in your home. Someone has a glass of water they are actively drinking. They excuse themselves for the powder room but will be back in a moment. What would you do?

Usually glasses would be cleaned up. If I set down my glass and come back I can't be sure someone didn't take a sip or confuse it with another one. If I was to leave I would ask my husband to hold my glass. I wouldn't put it down and expect it to be there when I got back.

Really? Wow.

MIL's found her tribe in the DCUM germaphobes!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ime the older generation doesn’t understand the constant need to drink water. I swear some of my family are really camels. 8 8oz glasses of water a day was a recommendation within the last 2ish decades and I think has been debunked.

Normally I’d say that they view you having a glass of water out as leaving a mess. But that doesn’t explain the water bottle. That just seems vindictive because it’s not in their line of site and it’s not like they are missing a glass that needs to be washed.

True, but obsessively picking up someone's glass is over the top. My family tends towards the opposite - my grandparents and parents generally use one glass a day. They wash it out after use and put it on the counter on a paper towel. This is for the express purpose of having to wash less dishes.

And conserving water. DH would lose it if someone kept dumping half consumed glasses and bottles of water and expecting people to refill. So environmentally terrible!

+1. So wasteful! And all the unnecessary dishwashing.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:MIL is going to lose her mind when the baby comes. Is she going to empty out and wash the bottles?

Well I hope so because refilling one bottle all day long is pretty gross without washing it. Baby gets a fresh bottle every feeding.

That bottle will be swiped by MIL as soon as someone puts it down to change the baby. God forbid she stores breastmilk in the freezer. MIL is a nut.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ime the older generation doesn’t understand the constant need to drink water. I swear some of my family are really camels. 8 8oz glasses of water a day was a recommendation within the last 2ish decades and I think has been debunked.

Normally I’d say that they view you having a glass of water out as leaving a mess. But that doesn’t explain the water bottle. That just seems vindictive because it’s not in their line of site and it’s not like they are missing a glass that needs to be washed.

True, but obsessively picking up someone's glass is over the top. My family tends towards the opposite - my grandparents and parents generally use one glass a day. They wash it out after use and put it on the counter on a paper towel. This is for the express purpose of having to wash less dishes.

And conserving water. DH would lose it if someone kept dumping half consumed glasses and bottles of water and expecting people to refill. So environmentally terrible!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ime the older generation doesn’t understand the constant need to drink water. I swear some of my family are really camels. 8 8oz glasses of water a day was a recommendation within the last 2ish decades and I think has been debunked.

Normally I’d say that they view you having a glass of water out as leaving a mess. But that doesn’t explain the water bottle. That just seems vindictive because it’s not in their line of site and it’s not like they are missing a glass that needs to be washed.

Needing to constantly drink water isn't good. Could be a sign of diabetes. Or in OPs case gestational diabetes.

I think it becomes a habit for people, not necessarily that they MUST have water because of a medical need.

But pregnant women do need more water than they would normally drink. It’s easy to become dehydrated when you’re pregnant.

But OP says to leave her cup there so she can refill. Sounds like she's leaving empty cups around. Which isn't really necessary. She's in a home with constant access to water. It's not hard to get a new cup and put the previous one in the sink when she's thirsty. There isn't a shortage of water or cups.

How do you know how many cups there are? OP isn’t intending to dirty multiple cups and “leave them around.” She is using ONE cup. As any guest may do in the home of any semi-decent host. She’s even trying to keep it out of the way in the guest bedroom.

From OP:
I asked them to please leave my water cups alone so I could refill, and they said “we don’t keep cups and glasses out.”

I assume you know that "cupS" implies more than one?

And I assume YOU know that:
1) It’s a multi-day visit (stated in the original post) so more than one day at this house = more than one cup will be used
2) Because they keep taking the one glass she is trying to keep, she has to get another one. Moron.

She has to get another one? Oh Lord. Sounds like torture. She will have to walk a few feet to take another tiny sip of water in a different glass.

Out of curiosity if someone was sitting in chair sipping water and they put the glass down (with water still in it) to get up to go to the bathroom. What would you do?

It depends on the person. If it's one of my kids I know they're not coming back to finish that drink. So I clean it up or put it in the fridge for later. They will also tell me "they aren't done yet" which is just a way of getting out of cleaning up after themselves. Only the in-laws know what OPs habits are and why are they responding the way they are.

NP. Same question, but it’s an adult houseguest. Let’s say it was cocktail hour before a dinner party in your home. Someone has a glass of water they are actively drinking. They excuse themselves for the powder room but will be back in a moment. What would you do?

Usually glasses would be cleaned up. If I set down my glass and come back I can't be sure someone didn't take a sip or confuse it with another one. If I was to leave I would ask my husband to hold my glass. I wouldn't put it down and expect it to be there when I got back.

Really? Wow.

Anonymous wrote:Doing something on a regular basis or being a “neat freak” does not mean someone has OCD.

The MIL was rude for taking Op’s water bottle and going into her room. People can be rude without having OCD. My dd is very open about her OCD. She is also one of the messiest people I know.

As long as Op isn’t leaving glasses in each room so she always has a drink available, MIL needs to relax. If Op is doing that, she needs to use one at a time.

Perhaps stay somewhere else next time since there are no boundaries (entering the guest room) and odd “rules.”

Not everyone's OCD presents the same way. I have a relative who's OCD is all about things that have been set down on surfaces and is constantly putting things in the dishwashers (they have to have more than one).

Have your mother-in-law watch the movie Signs and learn the importance of unfinished glasses of water.

I posted about my parents doing this to my kids when we visit. They just constantly picked up any cup my kids have and put it in the dishwasher. And then complained about how many cups my kids were using. Then they complain about the water bottles I assigned my kids instead and how tacky it is to leave water bottles out.

My parents basically think you only need a cup with a meal and shouldn't be drinking otherwise.

Get all of the glasses out at once. Carry a tray to where you’re sitting. Take them off the tray send the emptied tray back to kitchen with your husband.

Each time you want a drink, OP, go to the kitchen and make a big production about of drinking directly from the faucet ala a water fountain.