Anonymous wrote:OP here: I wanted to post an update. We bought a house in our preferred neighborhood with the schools we wanted in Fairfax. We were extremely lucky to find a house that met our needs, but our compromise was that it needed major cosmetic updates (but good bones). It has all the space we need, on a fantastic lot overlooking a park. We paid about what we would have paid for an updated home further out (maybe a touch under), and we're spending a good amount of money for essential updates now and will keep doing that slowly for all other non-essentail but desired updates. But the most important thing is that we love it and we'll love living in it, especially once we're done with major updates.
Thank you all who commented, and wish all the rest of you lots and lots of luck finding what you need/want.

Congrats OP! Would you mind sharing how it all played out? How many offers had you put in and how did you finally get the winning bid??

So happy for you guys!

OP here: I wanted to post an update. We bought a house in our preferred neighborhood with the schools we wanted in Fairfax. We were extremely lucky to find a house that met our needs, but our compromise was that it needed major cosmetic updates (but good bones). It has all the space we need, on a fantastic lot overlooking a park. We paid about what we would have paid for an updated home further out (maybe a touch under), and we're spending a good amount of money for essential updates now and will keep doing that slowly for all other non-essentail but desired updates. But the most important thing is that we love it and we'll love living in it, especially once we're done with major updates.
Thank you all who commented, and wish all the rest of you lots and lots of luck finding what you need/want.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d say widen the search.. so C? Doesn’t necessarily have to be to an exurb, but if you’re both working from home that’s a viable option.

OP here, to be more correct we both occasionally commute, and post-covid a 2-day office work is still in the cards... which makes a move too far not feasible right now.

You're boxing yourself in, OP. You need a house that is relatively close in, but also need a place large enough to have two dedicated offices.

To paraphrase an old saying, your considerations are a house in the right location, the right size, and for the right price. Pick two.

I am working out of a nook in our bedroom and DH is in the basement. It's totally fine (especially when children are actually in school) - I'm not sure dedicated offices are necessary - or feasible. A lot of close in homes have a dining room or a formal living room that you could convert to a home office. You don't need to move further out, just be more flexible.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My coworker is drinking every night thinking about this. Praying for a crash.

Ha, yeah me too. 3 years ago we were trying to save for a $1.2M home, now that we could afford that, the same home is $1.4-1.5M. In another 3 when we can afford this, those homes will be $1.7M. F this mess. We are just going to throw our money away on rent and live in the home we wish we could buy in the neighborhood we love. Funny thing is, we are so rich ($270HHI) but we can't afford a 3br home. Nuts.

Ummmmm…. $270K HHI isn’t really enough to buy $1.2M house in my book….

That HHI can be enough, but it depends on a lot of things. We make about $280K, not including bonuses (which we save/invest anyway) and bought for 1.3M last year in McLean. At the time, we had zero debt (aside from mortgage and a small low-interest car payment that we could have paid off if we wanted to... but why do that when I'd rather have the cash for a down payment?) and a healthy savings account in addition to some crazy equity in our previous house. 401Ks are maxed (or close to it), 529 plans for two kids are funded monthly, and even set aside some money that goes into my brokerage to buy whatever when the the market takes a random dip. Both kids just started public school, so the $2K+ per month that was going to infant care and pre-K for the better part of 4 years is now going into our savings.

But what made the biggest difference for us is really that we made good long-term financial decisions over 10 years ago. That and we got very, very lucky in our timing. We purchased our starter home at the bottom of the market in 2008, which is obviously just stupid good luck in retrospect. However, we were questioning whether it was a smart financial decision for more than half the time while living there (newlywed couple making maybe barely 150K HHI at the time buying a 400k foreclosure that needed work in an economically depressed area with not great schools... then, suddenly, Amazon HQ2). Being mostly debt free (also stupid good luck/privilege - both our families had saved for our undergrad, grad school was paid for by each of our employers) was another big factor in being able to afford our starter home in the first place, which is why I was adamant we start a 529 plan as soon as our kids were born. Seriously, student loan debt is crippling and will follow you to the grave.

My advice to the OP, make some compromises and buy the home that fits your needs for the next 10 years. Get your financial ducks in a row that way you give yourselves the best chance to succeed down the line when you are able to buy your dream home in the area you want. Real estate, like the stock market, isn't the get rich quick scheme many think it is. It's a long game so play to win that one.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My coworker is drinking every night thinking about this. Praying for a crash.

Ha, yeah me too. 3 years ago we were trying to save for a $1.2M home, now that we could afford that, the same home is $1.4-1.5M. In another 3 when we can afford this, those homes will be $1.7M. F this mess. We are just going to throw our money away on rent and live in the home we wish we could buy in the neighborhood we love. Funny thing is, we are so rich ($270HHI) but we can't afford a 3br home. Nuts.

Ummmmm…. $270K HHI isn’t really enough to buy $1.2M house in my book….

Eh, I'm in this boat. Net after taxes and deductions is $14.5k a month. PITA in a 1.2 mil mortgage at 2.25% is 5800. Leaves just shy of $9k/mo to live on. Daycare for two kids runs around 3k a month. No student loans and no car payment. Subtract utilities and that's a good $5k/mo to live on after all fixed expenses are cared for. That is plenty

We make a little less and bought a $520k home. We do have two car payments (our first cars ever, thanks butblife) and student loans. No daycare. Pita is $2900 cars are 1k (total) loans about another 1k and I don't think it's enough at all. The house always needs something, there are always medical expenses, and the DMV is an expensive place.

Sorry, that makes it sound like I'm complaining, I realize. I am totally NOT complaining. We live very well. Maybe too well, really. We are quite fortunate. I still wouldn't want that much of a mortgage. It's comforting to know we owe about 400k on our house (atm) and it's appreciated quite a bit. Also comforting to know that in a pinch we could probably pay our mortgage on a lot less income.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My coworker is drinking every night thinking about this. Praying for a crash.

Ha, yeah me too. 3 years ago we were trying to save for a $1.2M home, now that we could afford that, the same home is $1.4-1.5M. In another 3 when we can afford this, those homes will be $1.7M. F this mess. We are just going to throw our money away on rent and live in the home we wish we could buy in the neighborhood we love. Funny thing is, we are so rich ($270HHI) but we can't afford a 3br home. Nuts.

Ummmmm…. $270K HHI isn’t really enough to buy $1.2M house in my book….

Eh, I'm in this boat. Net after taxes and deductions is $14.5k a month. PITA in a 1.2 mil mortgage at 2.25% is 5800. Leaves just shy of $9k/mo to live on. Daycare for two kids runs around 3k a month. No student loans and no car payment. Subtract utilities and that's a good $5k/mo to live on after all fixed expenses are cared for. That is plenty

We make a little less and bought a $520k home. We do have two car payments (our first cars ever, thanks butblife) and student loans. No daycare. Pita is $2900 cars are 1k (total) loans about another 1k and I don't think it's enough at all. The house always needs something, there are always medical expenses, and the DMV is an expensive place.

That also isn't taking into account that I got a bank to lend me 1.2 million on a 30 yr loan at 2.25%. A couple of years at even ~3% inflation means a 10% inflationary "boost" on my housing affordability

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My coworker is drinking every night thinking about this. Praying for a crash.

Ha, yeah me too. 3 years ago we were trying to save for a $1.2M home, now that we could afford that, the same home is $1.4-1.5M. In another 3 when we can afford this, those homes will be $1.7M. F this mess. We are just going to throw our money away on rent and live in the home we wish we could buy in the neighborhood we love. Funny thing is, we are so rich ($270HHI) but we can't afford a 3br home. Nuts.

Ummmmm…. $270K HHI isn’t really enough to buy $1.2M house in my book….

Eh, I'm in this boat. Net after taxes and deductions is $14.5k a month. PITA in a 1.2 mil mortgage at 2.25% is 5800. Leaves just shy of $9k/mo to live on. Daycare for two kids runs around 3k a month. No student loans and no car payment. Subtract utilities and that's a good $5k/mo to live on after all fixed expenses are cared for. That is plenty

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My coworker is drinking every night thinking about this. Praying for a crash.

Ha, yeah me too. 3 years ago we were trying to save for a $1.2M home, now that we could afford that, the same home is $1.4-1.5M. In another 3 when we can afford this, those homes will be $1.7M. F this mess. We are just going to throw our money away on rent and live in the home we wish we could buy in the neighborhood we love. Funny thing is, we are so rich ($270HHI) but we can't afford a 3br home. Nuts.

Ummmmm…. $270K HHI isn’t really enough to buy $1.2M house in my book….

Good thing it's not your book.

Regarding the 3 year cycle, in 3 years you are paying 108k in rent (assuming your rent is around 3k). If your income isn't going to outpace appreciation, which it hasn't for your case, you need to look at different neighborhoods or just take the plunge and buy.

Seriously and you don’t know about peoples finances. Plenty of people have down payment assistance from family money too which changes the game.