Anonymous wrote:Joleen

Joleen is a quiet girl but a gifted scholar. She is a big science fiction and fantasty fan and is now horrified by the mess The Game of Throne series has become. Because of her interest in manga, she has outside of school, enrolled in Japanese classes and is now quite fluent. She will graduate high school as salutatorian and will go off to Yale. She starts off as a biochemistry major. However, she starts hating the grind of higher level biochemistry labs and all the brown nosing premed students. She toys with the idea of switching her major to landscape architecture. You, her parents, are alarmed at this and threaten to stop sending her her monthly stipend if she does this. Ever the diligent child, she even manages to get her Ph.D by spending next six years at Johns Hopkins studying embryonic cell lineage in C. elegans.

You are very different than your child. You are a graphic designer. You enjoy hot yoga and wear Tory Burch and back in college. To lose that last 10 lbs, you have switched to a gluten free diet. It worked and you are looking better than ever. You like going to charity balls with your DH and are active in the local Junior League chapter. DH has recently started doing the Insanity workout tapes. He is looking very buff. Together you make a handsome couple.

While you applaud your daughter's decision to continue doing science, you will have no idea what she's talking about half the time. Even your DH, a cardiologist, won't truly understand your daughter's research. It's an enigma. You try looking up science terms in the dictionary and those definitions each have about 10 additional words that you don't recognize. You give up and just hope and pray that your daughter will get a tenure track position somewhere and NIH grants forevermore.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Joel and Ben

You are Jewish, but not too Jewish. You and your spouse met at college, probably at UMD or Ohio State or Penn State. You might be from the midwest. The kids go to Jewish preschool and you go to Tot Shabbat sometimes, but you call it "temple" not "shul." Once the kids are in school, they'll go to MoCo public and play soccer.

Pretty much all true

Anonymous wrote:Kourtney
Kim
Khloe

Your ex-DH is now prettier than you and you're furious!

Anonymous wrote:Jack & Erica (twins)

You've won't admit it, but the inspiration for your children's names comes from your addiction to soap operas. You've secretly always wanted to be Erica Kane, the saucy siren of All My Children with her killer figure and man eating ways. You particularly relished the plotline when Jack Montgomery entered the fray, so thus, Jack and Erica seemed like a great name combo. Plus, the names didn't rhyme or sound too cutesy poo together. It's not like you could name the babies Carrie and Mr. Big either.

Right now, you are exhausted. Even before the twins were born, you had to be put on bedrest and now they are out, they are nonstop work. You've given up trying to dress them in separate girl and boy outfits, it's easier laundrywise just to buy unisex clothes and just put a bow on Erica. This time will pass and soon you will be in a book club and both you and DH will have a weekly bowling night (grandma will gladly watch her grand babies). DH is saving up for a Harley Davidson. When he gets his bike in two years time, he'll start wearing a leather jacket the sight of which will revv your engines. You will then decide to go platinum blonde. Unexpected baby number 3 will be conceived.

Claudia and Julia

Ryan and Rachel

Is the same person writing these? Because OMG, I am cracking up. You have a gift, my friend.

Anonymous wrote:

Abby
Anne
Megan (Maggie)

You've never understood people who feel the need to 'prove themself' with something trendy and different, like hybrid cars, tatoos, or unusual names for their children. When you had your girls, you went with the classics, and dressed them accordingly in dresses with smocking and patent leather mary janes. Abby and Anne are in high school now, and fight like cats and dogs, though both are good kids. Abby is doing an internship at the NIH this summer and hoping to major in Biology at Dartmouth. Anne just finished her sophomore year, and is still trying to find her groove. You've been encouraging her to try out some clubs or at least continue with the clarinet, but she mostly just texts on her smartphone and reads fan fiction for the Hunger Games.

Maggie is quite a bit younger than the other girls, and having her was your husband's concession to you when acquiesced to his desire to move your family from Chicago and family to come to DC for career opportunities. By that time, you were a bit more relaxed, and willing to bestow a more playful name, albeit only as a nickname. You fear perhaps you may have been a little too lenient with her however, as while Maggie is both a source of light and laughter, she terrifies you. She's hardly in middle school, and yet just last month, she secretly bought some hairdye and dyed her hair green. Green! You are fairly certain tatoos are coming next...

I am amazed! I am not at all trendy, did dress the girls in classics, Abby and Anne ARE in high school. No internship for Abby nor is she aspiring to Dartmouth, but she does want to study science. Not a ton of fighting, but both good kids. Anne is still trying to find her groove in HS, and does play an instrument (you were close, she plays the flute).

Maggie is four years younger than the other girls, although we've always been in the DC area. Yes,we were more relaxed with Maggie and she is a bit crazy, although no hair dye yet!

Abby
Anne
Megan (Maggie)

You've never understood people who feel the need to 'prove themself' with something trendy and different, like hybrid cars, tatoos, or unusual names for their children. When you had your girls, you went with the classics, and dressed them accordingly in dresses with smocking and patent leather mary janes. Abby and Anne are in high school now, and fight like cats and dogs, though both are good kids. Abby is doing an internship at the NIH this summer and hoping to major in Biology at Dartmouth. Anne just finished her sophomore year, and is still trying to find her groove. You've been encouraging her to try out some clubs or at least continue with the clarinet, but she mostly just texts on her smartphone and reads fan fiction for the Hunger Games.

Maggie is quite a bit younger than the other girls, and having her was your husband's concession to you when acquiesced to his desire to move your family from Chicago and family to come to DC for career opportunities. By that time, you were a bit more relaxed, and willing to bestow a more playful name, albeit only as a nickname. You fear perhaps you may have been a little too lenient with her however, as while Maggie is both a source of light and laughter, she terrifies you. She's hardly in middle school, and yet just last month, she secretly bought some hairdye and dyed her hair green. Green! You are fairly certain tatoos are coming next...

Best thread ever!

Margot
Sofia (Sofi)
Andres (Andy)
Cecilia

Abby
Anne
Megan (Maggie)

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Anna
Lauren

Hey, I also have an Anna and a Lauren!

You both agonized over Ann verus Anna and Lauren verus Laura with your spouse, but the more current name won out each time. Your home looks like a page out of the Pottery Barn catalog and the kids are close in age and play well together, they are best friends. All the girls are very much into art and their artwork--drawings and painted clay objects--has filled up many shelves in their room. You drive a white Infiniti, wear Banana Republic clothes, and enjoy Californian wines.

The girls being friends, close in age, and artwork all over the place is accurate. The rest, sort of. Fun read

Anne
James (Jamie)

Hayden and Stella