Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a mid-40s divorced dad, and here's what I'd like: A woman who looks sexy AF in a tennis outfit. Twice a week, we'd play some competitive tennis, screw, and share a meal (or tennis, meal,screw, who cares ... or tennis, screw, meal, screw). That would be perfect. Haven't found it yet, though.

Great, so basically you want a woman to have sex with and play sports with but not have a relationship with. 99 percent of woman do not want that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am 44 and I would be very interested. I have primary custody so looking to spend some weekends at nice hotels, being treated to nice dinners etc etc
I need to get in shape though before I start dating. I love sex but need to get rid of some extra pounds!
You may be interested in younger women though (I would if I were a physically fit biglaw lawyer!)

Stay away from this person... she wants somebody with money, never mentioned being loving or supportive. You have money, she has sex... terrible formula.

Also PP, get some therapy.

I don’t think I need or want love and support, and I doubt I can give it.
But I am fun, won’t saddle a guy with problems, etc.

Saddle him w saddle bags. Funny that you don’t have the motivation to work out but you expend him to have the motivation to earn money he will spend on you.

I already take myself away for luxurious weekends- I earn a lot. I’m fit already, I sell that, not the promise of my weight loss and the weekend away man can take me on.

That’s what works for me as a woman, OP. Don’t settle- sugar daddy is fun for a second but breeds resentment. Find a hot peer similar enough to you who is sexually adventurous and love your best life for a while.

This. Just don't want to deal with it. Life as a working mom is hard enough without additional people to factor in.

Anonymous wrote:Any advice on this? I'm a 46 year man about to be relatively amicably divorced after 15 years of marriage. I have two kids in elementary school; I'll have joint custody but they'll mainly live with their mom. I'm a BigLaw lawyer. I'm physically fit. I work a lot (which you already know, because I'm a BigLaw lawyer). And with the same income suddenly being stretched over two households, I'm not going to be living in the swankiest apartment or spending a lot of money on luxury items.

I definitely am not about to start searching for wife #2, but I'd like to date and maybe build up to something steady. So, what are the demographics of the women who are mostly likely to be interested in me? In other words, what should my target dating pool be? For example, are there particular age brackets likely to be interested (or likely not to be interested)? Am I more likely to appeal to women who are divorced or who have never married? What about women who have kids, doesn't have kids, wants more kids, or never wants kids? Anything else?

And do you recommend any particular dating apps (or IRL activities) to meet these women?

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Anonymous wrote:Late 30s, 1 child, amicably divorced and open to more kids down the road if I met the right woman. Financially independent from the sale of a business. Curious if/how this would change any of the advice given.

If you are open (and can afford a good life to) more children, that certainly increases your options. However, the smartest and prettiest women in their 20s and early 30s without children aren't going to settle for being your #2 family--unless you are making a ton of money. That could sway them.

Just curious, what would you consider a ton of money?

Enough to pay child support and private college for the kids you have, and to raise two or more additional kids at an equal standard of living and same college fund, without needing your wife to work full-time. Part-time is okay.

I sort of agree with this except I think it is a little overly optimistic. I think the vast majority of women in their twenties and thirties simply won’t want to marry a divorced dad even if he is willing to have more kids and even if he has the money above. Maybe women 37,38 and up will start being open to the ide especially if you make a lot of money. But you won’t be any ones first choice. The guys without kids have a big leg up over you, even if they have less money.

I agree with this. In my 20s through mid-30s, I (and most of my similarly situated single friends - I don't know if we are all the "prettiest" but we were certainly among the smartest, most highly educated/accomplished women in our age group, and generally attractive, slim etc.) were all unwilling to date men with kids/ex-wives, mostly because we had zero interest in being a stepmother and dealing with the hassles that go along with being a second wife. There were definitely still enough smart, accomplished single men who didn't have kids already to go around such that we didn't have to do that. I only noticed my single friends doing it as we approached 40. Note that this doesn't apply to divorced men w/o kids; most of my friends had no problem dating them.

This. Just don't want to deal with it. Life as a working mom is hard enough without additional people to factor in. If I really fell in love with a specific person I would consider it, but knowing what I know from my friends who are stepmothers, hard pass.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Late 30s, 1 child, amicably divorced and open to more kids down the road if I met the right woman. Financially independent from the sale of a business. Curious if/how this would change any of the advice given.

If you are open (and can afford a good life to) more children, that certainly increases your options. However, the smartest and prettiest women in their 20s and early 30s without children aren't going to settle for being your #2 family--unless you are making a ton of money. That could sway them.

Just curious, what would you consider a ton of money?

Enough to pay child support and private college for the kids you have, and to raise two or more additional kids at an equal standard of living and same college fund, without needing your wife to work full-time. Part-time is okay.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Late 30s, 1 child, amicably divorced and open to more kids down the road if I met the right woman. Financially independent from the sale of a business. Curious if/how this would change any of the advice given.

If you are open (and can afford a good life to) more children, that certainly increases your options. However, the smartest and prettiest women in their 20s and early 30s without children aren't going to settle for being your #2 family--unless you are making a ton of money. That could sway them.

Just curious, what would you consider a ton of money?

Enough to pay child support and private college for the kids you have, and to raise two or more additional kids at an equal standard of living and same college fund, without needing your wife to work full-time. Part-time is okay.

I sort of agree with this except I think it is a little overly optimistic. I think the vast majority of women in their twenties and thirties simply won’t want to marry a divorced dad even if he is willing to have more kids and even if he has the money above. Maybe women 37,38 and up will start being open to the ide especially if you make a lot of money. But you won’t be any ones first choice. The guys without kids have a big leg up over you, even if they have less money.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Late 30s, 1 child, amicably divorced and open to more kids down the road if I met the right woman. Financially independent from the sale of a business. Curious if/how this would change any of the advice given.

If you are open (and can afford a good life to) more children, that certainly increases your options. However, the smartest and prettiest women in their 20s and early 30s without children aren't going to settle for being your #2 family--unless you are making a ton of money. That could sway them.

Just curious, what would you consider a ton of money?

Enough to pay child support and private college for the kids you have, and to raise two or more additional kids at an equal standard of living and same college fund, without needing your wife to work full-time. Part-time is okay.

I sort of agree with this except I think it is a little overly optimistic. I think the vast majority of women in their twenties and thirties simply won’t want to marry a divorced dad even if he is willing to have more kids and even if he has the money above. Maybe women 37,38 and up will start being open to the ide especially if you make a lot of money. But you won’t be any ones first choice. The guys without kids have a big leg up over you, even if they have less money.

I agree with this. In my 20s through mid-30s, I (and most of my similarly situated single friends - I don't know if we are all the "prettiest" but we were certainly among the smartest, most highly educated/accomplished women in our age group, and generally attractive, slim etc.) were all unwilling to date men with kids/ex-wives, mostly because we had zero interest in being a stepmother and dealing with the hassles that go along with being a second wife. There were definitely still enough smart, accomplished single men who didn't have kids already to go around such that we didn't have to do that. I only noticed my single friends doing it as we approached 40. Note that this doesn't apply to divorced men w/o kids; most of my friends had no problem dating them.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Late 30s, 1 child, amicably divorced and open to more kids down the road if I met the right woman. Financially independent from the sale of a business. Curious if/how this would change any of the advice given.

If you are open (and can afford a good life to) more children, that certainly increases your options. However, the smartest and prettiest women in their 20s and early 30s without children aren't going to settle for being your #2 family--unless you are making a ton of money. That could sway them.

Just curious, what would you consider a ton of money?

Enough to pay child support and private college for the kids you have, and to raise two or more additional kids at an equal standard of living and same college fund, without needing your wife to work full-time. Part-time is okay.

I sort of agree with this except I think it is a little overly optimistic. I think the vast majority of women in their twenties and thirties simply won’t want to marry a divorced dad even if he is willing to have more kids and even if he has the money above. Maybe women 37,38 and up will start being open to the ide especially if you make a lot of money. But you won’t be any ones first choice. The guys without kids have a big leg up over you, even if they have less money.

I agree with this. In my 20s through mid-30s, I (and most of my similarly situated single friends - I don't know if we are all the "prettiest" but we were certainly among the smartest, most highly educated/accomplished women in our age group, and generally attractive, slim etc.) were all unwilling to date men with kids/ex-wives, mostly because we had zero interest in being a stepmother and dealing with the hassles that go along with being a second wife. There were definitely still enough smart, accomplished single men who didn't have kids already to go around such that we didn't have to do that. I only noticed my single friends doing it as we approached 40. Note that this doesn't apply to divorced men w/o kids; most of my friends had no problem dating them.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Late 30s, 1 child, amicably divorced and open to more kids down the road if I met the right woman. Financially independent from the sale of a business. Curious if/how this would change any of the advice given.

If you are open (and can afford a good life to) more children, that certainly increases your options. However, the smartest and prettiest women in their 20s and early 30s without children aren't going to settle for being your #2 family--unless you are making a ton of money. That could sway them.

Just curious, what would you consider a ton of money?

Enough to pay child support and private college for the kids you have, and to raise two or more additional kids at an equal standard of living and same college fund, without needing your wife to work full-time. Part-time is okay.

I sort of agree with this except I think it is a little overly optimistic. I think the vast majority of women in their twenties and thirties simply won’t want to marry a divorced dad even if he is willing to have more kids and even if he has the money above. Maybe women 37,38 and up will start being open to the ide especially if you make a lot of money. But you won’t be any ones first choice. The guys without kids have a big leg up over you, even if they have less money.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Late 30s, 1 child, amicably divorced and open to more kids down the road if I met the right woman. Financially independent from the sale of a business. Curious if/how this would change any of the advice given.

If you are open (and can afford a good life to) more children, that certainly increases your options. However, the smartest and prettiest women in their 20s and early 30s without children aren't going to settle for being your #2 family--unless you are making a ton of money. That could sway them.

Just curious, what would you consider a ton of money?

Enough to pay child support and private college for the kids you have, and to raise two or more additional kids at an equal standard of living and same college fund, without needing your wife to work full-time. Part-time is okay.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a mid-40s divorced dad, and here's what I'd like: A woman who looks sexy AF in a tennis outfit. Twice a week, we'd play some competitive tennis, screw, and share a meal (or tennis, meal,screw, who cares ... or tennis, screw, meal, screw). That would be perfect. Haven't found it yet, though.

Can't imagine why.