Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It sounds like you have worked in your own disordered view of eating, which is great. Your DD has probably developed some similar patterns given how much energy you seem to have focused on her food choices since babyhood (no puffs?!) so hopefully you continue to work on yourself.

Nasty nasty. This is the pot calling the kettle black. Work on herself? No... work on yourself. The OP has done a terrific job and has acknowledged her eating views.

No she hasn’t. She has come back repeatedly to tout this great epiphany she had, without recognizing that she was part of the problem all along.

Anonymous wrote:The child psychiatrists at our hospital have started looking at behavioral interventions for kids who are overweight as well (we give a lot of drugs that cause weight gain). They were looking at younger kids, but they found exactly the same thing. Food restrictions didn’t work at all. Therapy and cognitive interventions for kids and parents didn’t work. Teaching parents new, healthy recipes didn’t work. The only thing that worked was adding more fruits and veggies and increased exercise.

I thought - and I say this is someone who exercises a ton, so I wish it weren’t the case – that exercise has been proven to not make much of a difference when it comes to weight. As in, it’s all about diet. Is that not the same for kids? Asking seriously.

The child psychiatrists at our hospital have started looking at behavioral interventions for kids who are overweight as well (we give a lot of drugs that cause weight gain). They were looking at younger kids, but they found exactly the same thing. Food restrictions didn’t work at all. Therapy and cognitive interventions for kids and parents didn’t work. Teaching parents new, healthy recipes didn’t work. The only thing that worked was adding more fruits and veggies and increased exercise.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Let me summarize once again: no one is saying healthy eating and exercise aren’t good practices. People are saying that OP’s post reeked of her own disordered thinking - SEPARATE from those practices - and likely caused her kids issues in the first place.

Yes, this is a perfect description.

No, I think only one or a couple of you are doing this, and you're admitting that you're making assumptions about what you think is really going on. YOU sound like you have baggage around this and are projecting it onto OP.

Let's try again.

OP posted on social media.
She started with "cured"
She stated that "infant never left a drop"
She stated that 'apples & grapes in her mind" were not reasonable snacks.
She feels 90 minutes of exercise daily is required, every single day. Like this is some revelation that DD has to do for the absolute rest of her life. If it's less than "90 minutes" daily??
She is way too focused on BMI. That is better to use as a guideline not an absolute metric.

It's great to give healthy choices. It's great to be supportive of your DC. It's not great that the child is constantly aware of her mother's sensitivity to weight gain, which is so completely obvious from her original post.

Your voracity in reading into OP’s comments really says more about you than OP.

What’s wrong with the word “cured”?

Anonymous wrote:Genetically programmed to be big? I suppose that is possible, it is still a disease to be obese regardless of causes. Leaving it to devil may care is not the right approach. How do you justify then parents of kids with autism or different genetic illnesses constantly striving to help imp prove their kids' lives? Isn't that just as wrong since their kids are genetically programmed to have these issues?

it's not all or nothing. Yes true obesity, rather than bmi nonsense, is serious and needs to be addressed in terms of weight loss. But unless weight is affecting health, you should not focus on it. At 140 post pregnancy for several years, I looked like a stuffed sausage in my clothes, but I was just as healthy those years as I am at my current weight, around 110. Genetically I am not programmed to be big and I have a fast metabilism, so eventually I lost it, but big genes run in my husband's family. And I hope I can help my kids not feel as grotesque as I felt when I was 30 pounds bigger than "thin." Eating well and exercising most days and sleeping enough and working on stress management - these are key. Being thin is not. It's not a devil make care attitude. It's a focus on true health.

Anonymous wrote:It sounds like you have worked in your own disordered view of eating, which is great. Your DD has probably developed some similar patterns given how much energy you seem to have focused on her food choices since babyhood (no puffs?!) so hopefully you continue to work on yourself.

Nasty nasty. This is the pot calling the kettle black. Work on herself? No... work on yourself. The OP has done a terrific job and has acknowledged her eating views.

Genetically programmed to be big? I suppose that is possible, it is still a disease to be obese regardless of causes. Leaving it to devil may care is not the right approach. How do you justify then parents of kids with autism or different genetic illnesses constantly striving to help imp prove their kids' lives? Isn't that just as wrong since their kids are genetically programmed to have these issues?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Healthy at any size is a lie.

not at any size. But you can be big and very healthy if you exercise and eat well.

I mean this kindly, but no. If you’re obese that’s not the same as overweight. Excess fat strains all your organs and can come with a host of problems. Regardless of how well you eat and exercise

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Let me summarize once again: no one is saying healthy eating and exercise aren’t good practices. People are saying that OP’s post reeked of her own disordered thinking - SEPARATE from those practices - and likely caused her kids issues in the first place.

Yes, this is a perfect description.

No, I think only one or a couple of you are doing this, and you're admitting that you're making assumptions about what you think is really going on. YOU sound like you have baggage around this and are projecting it onto OP.

Huh? You think it’s normal to act like grapes and bananas are unhealthy?

The kid I knew whose mom was like OP would literally eat crumbs from under the table in pre-K because she’d internalized that there wasn’t going to be enough food given to sustain her and also that eating was shameful.

Me: MD said not to restrict any food so I didn’t
You: OP is like a mom I knew whose kid had to lick crumbs off the floor

Any doubt it’s you, not me, who has issues?

Anonymous wrote:Healthy at any size is a lie.

not at any size. But you can be big and very healthy if you exercise and eat well.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Let me summarize once again: no one is saying healthy eating and exercise aren’t good practices. People are saying that OP’s post reeked of her own disordered thinking - SEPARATE from those practices - and likely caused her kids issues in the first place.

Yes, this is a perfect description.

No, I think only one or a couple of you are doing this, and you're admitting that you're making assumptions about what you think is really going on. YOU sound like you have baggage around this and are projecting it onto OP.

Let's try again.

OP posted on social media.
She started with "cured"
She stated that "infant never left a drop"
She stated that 'apples & grapes in her mind" were not reasonable snacks.
She feels 90 minutes of exercise daily is required, every single day. Like this is some revelation that DD has to do for the absolute rest of her life. If it's less than "90 minutes" daily??
She is way too focused on BMI. That is better to use as a guideline not an absolute metric.

It's great to give healthy choices. It's great to be supportive of your DC. It's not great that the child is constantly aware of her mother's sensitivity to weight gain, which is so completely obvious from her original post.

Some people are not genetically likely to be thin. Some people are genetically likely to be obese. Those people will likely need to work to be normal weight for a good part of their lives. Or they could just be obese. You seem to prefer the latter. And you think OP should listen to you and stop helping her DD work to be normal weight.

That's wrong.

No not at all what I said. It really doesn't matter does it? OP decided to post on social media in a place where people comment. Why is anyone surprised some people do not agree with at post that starts with "cured obesity". I totally support OP's desire to help her child be healthy. What I do not support is the way she is going about it emotionally. There is a higher chance her thought process which again she posted on social media is not going to work long term. She comes off obsessive at best from day one. And while yes, figuring out that grapes and apples are ok for her DC to eat, she has not "cured" her DC.

Fruit and juice have too much sugar

Healthy at any size is a lie.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Let me summarize once again: no one is saying healthy eating and exercise aren’t good practices. People are saying that OP’s post reeked of her own disordered thinking - SEPARATE from those practices - and likely caused her kids issues in the first place.

Yes, this is a perfect description.

No, I think only one or a couple of you are doing this, and you're admitting that you're making assumptions about what you think is really going on. YOU sound like you have baggage around this and are projecting it onto OP.

Let's try again.

OP posted on social media.
She started with "cured"
She stated that "infant never left a drop"
She stated that 'apples & grapes in her mind" were not reasonable snacks.
She feels 90 minutes of exercise daily is required, every single day. Like this is some revelation that DD has to do for the absolute rest of her life. If it's less than "90 minutes" daily??
She is way too focused on BMI. That is better to use as a guideline not an absolute metric.

It's great to give healthy choices. It's great to be supportive of your DC. It's not great that the child is constantly aware of her mother's sensitivity to weight gain, which is so completely obvious from her original post.

Some people are not genetically likely to be thin. Some people are genetically likely to be obese. Those people will likely need to work to be normal weight for a good part of their lives. Or they could just be obese. You seem to prefer the latter. And you think OP should listen to you and stop helping her DD work to be normal weight.

That's wrong.

Not pp, but yes I think it is wrong to try to be thin when you are gentically programmed for big. And I don't think it will work, or at least without a lot of grief and an inordinate amount of mental energy that could be better spent on so many mor eimportant things. Instead embrace healthy - eat well and exercise and enjoy your bigger body. With that approach she'll never hit truely fat, whatever her BMI says (BTW BMI is a flawed measure and dieting causes your set weight to rise - it is one of the causes of obesity). Healthy comes in many sizes. If you exercise daily and eat well you will be healthy and you could be happy if your mom didn't give you a complex when you were ypung.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Let me summarize once again: no one is saying healthy eating and exercise aren’t good practices. People are saying that OP’s post reeked of her own disordered thinking - SEPARATE from those practices - and likely caused her kids issues in the first place.

Yes, this is a perfect description.

No, I think only one or a couple of you are doing this, and you're admitting that you're making assumptions about what you think is really going on. YOU sound like you have baggage around this and are projecting it onto OP.

Let's try again.

OP posted on social media.
She started with "cured"
She stated that "infant never left a drop"
She stated that 'apples & grapes in her mind" were not reasonable snacks.
She feels 90 minutes of exercise daily is required, every single day. Like this is some revelation that DD has to do for the absolute rest of her life. If it's less than "90 minutes" daily??
She is way too focused on BMI. That is better to use as a guideline not an absolute metric.

It's great to give healthy choices. It's great to be supportive of your DC. It's not great that the child is constantly aware of her mother's sensitivity to weight gain, which is so completely obvious from her original post.

Some people are not genetically likely to be thin. Some people are genetically likely to be obese. Those people will likely need to work to be normal weight for a good part of their lives. Or they could just be obese. You seem to prefer the latter. And you think OP should listen to you and stop helping her DD work to be normal weight.

That's wrong.