Anonymous
01/04/2020 15:22
Subject: It’s official. Your kids are out of control people.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Maybe five-year-old are brattier, I don't know. I am not around enough kids that age to know. But I am around teens and tweens a lot, and I think they are markedly kinder and nicer than previous generations. I wonder if people like OP are more likely to raise the mean kids, because they learn judgmental behavior from the cradle.
I don't know, but what I see are kids who are in general noticeably kinder than previous generations -- and than their parents. Something has changed for the better.
This is what I have seen too. I have a tween and teen and even when I worked in a high school up to a couple of years ago - the kids were so nice. They are much kinder and more empathetic than previous generations - definitely nicer than when I was a tween and teen, that is for sure.
My grandma used to say that every parent had at least a few hard years with each kid, but which particular years were hard varied. I wonder if the way children are raised these days (obviously very generally speaking) leads to kinder, more empathetic teens, but more unruly younger kids. I don't know, but I think the general sweetness and empathy of today's teens is striking. Something is going right there.
Yes, I agree with your grandma!
I do wonder if more flexibility and patience for "unruly" child behavior leads to more compassionate teens. It's an interesting question, at least. I hear over and over from long-term teachers that today's teens are just nicer in general.
Anonymous
01/03/2020 09:30
Subject: It’s official. Your kids are out of control people.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Totally agree. It's like being held hostage -- parents won't say anything and YOU'RE not allowed to say anything to THEIR precious kids, either.
True, but one of the advantages of being/appearing very old is that you can stop giving a damn and start scaring the bratty kids! What are they gonna do really?
+1 I met someone recently at a planning meeting at my home who had needed to bring her 3 1/2 year old. It was informal, he entertained himself with some activities she brought, it was fine ... until it was time to leave. Kid didn't want to go, mom is negotiating. Kid starts throwing things, mom is telling him that's not how we handle toys. Kid head butts me hard in the legs, mom tells him that's not nice. Kid get evil look, whirls around, grabs a completed lego off my shelf, and throws it to the ground. Mom is still negotiating from 6 feet away. Just as he winds up to do a full sweep of the shelf into my face, I grabbed his hands. Mom finally comes to get him saying how hard it is to control kids, excuse, excuse. I'm just thinking - no it's not, just pick him the f0ck up! You are three times his size and handle horses. Good grief!
Saw him again in a couple different settings after this, and he would randomly walk up to adults and hit them or punch them. She seemed to think this was normal. Yikes.
as a parent with medical issues, it is impossible for me to pick up my child and whisk them off. You wouldn't know it by looking at me, but I do feel like I am judged. I have to do things differently---and it may not be instantaneous, but that's just the way it is for my family
Different is fine but letting you kid misbehave and do nothing is not ok. You may not be able to pick your kid up but you an use a stroller, ask someone for help, etc. Or, if your kid behaves that way, they stay home.
Kids shouldn't really be in strollers beyond age 2.5-----Ask who for help exactly--those who pass judgment??? And we do stay home a lot--I can't be the one taking the kid to certain places because of the physical exertion on my body.
For us, if it's time to leave, and as many kids do, they want to linger around more, some parents may just whisk them off (or as you say, strap them into a stroller). Both require physical demands. I will be the parent who is using words and it may take longer, but that's just the way it is.
Anonymous
01/03/2020 01:11
Subject: It’s official. Your kids are out of control people.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Maybe five-year-old are brattier, I don't know. I am not around enough kids that age to know. But I am around teens and tweens a lot, and I think they are markedly kinder and nicer than previous generations. I wonder if people like OP are more likely to raise the mean kids, because they learn judgmental behavior from the cradle.
I don't know, but what I see are kids who are in general noticeably kinder than previous generations -- and than their parents. Something has changed for the better.
This is what I have seen too. I have a tween and teen and even when I worked in a high school up to a couple of years ago - the kids were so nice. They are much kinder and more empathetic than previous generations - definitely nicer than when I was a tween and teen, that is for sure.
My grandma used to say that every parent had at least a few hard years with each kid, but which particular years were hard varied. I wonder if the way children are raised these days (obviously very generally speaking) leads to kinder, more empathetic teens, but more unruly younger kids. I don't know, but I think the general sweetness and empathy of today's teens is striking. Something is going right there.
Yes, I agree with your grandma!