Anonymous
Post 02/19/2017 23:52     Subject: Re:Why are so many women here so angry with / resentful toward women who stay home?

I don't personally know anyone who resents anyone who stays at home or anyone who's jealous.

My friend group is mostly WOH mothers with a few who SAH. Nobody gives a crap. We're friends.
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2017 23:46     Subject: Why are so many women here so angry with / resentful toward women who stay home?

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I think there is some jealous there. In the DC area, one partner has to be making a lot of money to enable the other to stay home and still maintain a nice lifestyle (nice house in a close in nabe, vacations, nice cars, pricey extracurricular activities for the kiddos, maybe private school, etc.)

To have an UMC lifestyle with a SAHP, the breadwinner has to be making 300-400k +.


On my end its less jealous and more...disbelief. I was raised to be independent and to own my own financials. When I went into my marriage I was comfortably set in a career and had two properties free-and-clear. That only helped when we made future decisions together to buy our 'dream' home. It boggles my mind that some women will rely solely on another person's generosity to live their life.

It disturbs me even further when these same women, some of them friends, were die-hard Hillary fans and very much into telling their daughters that 'this will be the first woman president, someone to look up to, someone to emulate' and yet the closest rolemodel to those daughters completely opted out of a career. How can you tell your children to aspire to be the head of NASA or a president or a multi-millionaire CEO, but you didn't bother to do anything yourself?


This last paragraph is 100% how I feel.


Both of you are simpletons then. You *really* can't understand that a woman might agree with and respect Hilary's politics and yet not want to live out her choices on a day to day basis? Talk about scoffing in disbelief. Wow.


Of course you can't see it or you deliberately choose not to. You can't admit that it's ironic for a woman who does nothing professionally - and based on this thread devalues women who do - to go on and on about how amazing it is for a woman to be considered for the most respected professional position in the country?

My favorite is the stay at home moms who push and push their daughters academically (because they have nothing left to do… Live vicariously since life basically ends for them when they push the baby out) yet do nothing using their own academic background, and set no personal professional example. Then they wonder why their daughters dont excel - and end up encouraging "the man is the plan" - and the cycle begins again. 1950s here we come!


OMG. You are a twit. I did not vote for HRC because she has a vagina. Did you really? Because your assumption that other people did is more revealing of your own beliefs in this regard, not mine. I voted for her because I support the kinds of policies she supports and because the alternative wad the kind of bumbling idiot who will get us into war. It had NOTHING to do with the fact that she would have been the first female president. You sound like a f***ing seventh grader. Did you vote for Obama because he was the first black president too? How simple are you?


Don't be disingenuous. Plenty of people voted for each candidate you name for exactly those reasons and have not been shy about exhorting others to do so, and congratulate themselves for having done so.


Well they're idiots then, clearly. It's the same as voting for GW Bush because you'd like to have a beer with him. It's stupid. No woman I respect pushed others to vote for Hillary because she was the only one in the race with a vagina. You vote for the person who you think will do the best job (and in this case, HRC was the clear winner for anyone with half a brain).


No one was disparaging or questioning your choice to vote for HRC based on her policies. The question was simple - how can you encourage your children to reflect on Hillary's accomplishments and be successful in their own aspirations in their careers and society contributions, when that wasn't a priority in your own life?

I feel bad for your kids. The idea that your value in the world comes from what your career is just about the last lesson I want to impart on my children.


+1.


So you want your kid to think only men can value from their careers, or does your husband stay home to take care of the kids as well?


My kids aren't apparently as stupid as yours; they understand that both parents contribute to keeping the family together regardless of whether they do so inside or outside the home.


Huh? You just said you don"t want your kids to be career driven. Presumably, your husband is career driven or you would not be able to afford being a sah, so,you men you don't want your kid to see women as career driven? Ok, then, we definitely have a very different world view, mine has evolved since 1955.


Not the PP(s) you are quoting but WHAT? THE HECK???? Your interpretation skills are either seriously lacking or you are a complete ass. How in the world do YOU function in the work place or anyplace with this completely obnoxious "you just said (fill in the blank with something that was not said or even implied)" style of non-communication. What a hateful person you seem like. I cannot imagine having to deal with you in rea.


Read your post, you are brimming with hate. Don't you stay at home to avoid stress. Of so, it isn't working.

I don't stay home. I work two jobs. No hate here just frustration and sadness at all of the tearing down going on here. I would feel better about myself if I worked less and could spend more time with my kids. But then I would have to deal with someone like you telling me I am not teaching my kids to be career driven??? That's nuts.


What PP said.
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2017 23:45     Subject: Why are so many women here so angry with / resentful toward women who stay home?

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I think there is some jealous there. In the DC area, one partner has to be making a lot of money to enable the other to stay home and still maintain a nice lifestyle (nice house in a close in nabe, vacations, nice cars, pricey extracurricular activities for the kiddos, maybe private school, etc.)

To have an UMC lifestyle with a SAHP, the breadwinner has to be making 300-400k +.


On my end its less jealous and more...disbelief. I was raised to be independent and to own my own financials. When I went into my marriage I was comfortably set in a career and had two properties free-and-clear. That only helped when we made future decisions together to buy our 'dream' home. It boggles my mind that some women will rely solely on another person's generosity to live their life.

It disturbs me even further when these same women, some of them friends, were die-hard Hillary fans and very much into telling their daughters that 'this will be the first woman president, someone to look up to, someone to emulate' and yet the closest rolemodel to those daughters completely opted out of a career. How can you tell your children to aspire to be the head of NASA or a president or a multi-millionaire CEO, but you didn't bother to do anything yourself?


This last paragraph is 100% how I feel.


Both of you are simpletons then. You *really* can't understand that a woman might agree with and respect Hilary's politics and yet not want to live out her choices on a day to day basis? Talk about scoffing in disbelief. Wow.


Of course you can't see it or you deliberately choose not to. You can't admit that it's ironic for a woman who does nothing professionally - and based on this thread devalues women who do - to go on and on about how amazing it is for a woman to be considered for the most respected professional position in the country?

My favorite is the stay at home moms who push and push their daughters academically (because they have nothing left to do… Live vicariously since life basically ends for them when they push the baby out) yet do nothing using their own academic background, and set no personal professional example. Then they wonder why their daughters dont excel - and end up encouraging "the man is the plan" - and the cycle begins again. 1950s here we come!


OMG. You are a twit. I did not vote for HRC because she has a vagina. Did you really? Because your assumption that other people did is more revealing of your own beliefs in this regard, not mine. I voted for her because I support the kinds of policies she supports and because the alternative wad the kind of bumbling idiot who will get us into war. It had NOTHING to do with the fact that she would have been the first female president. You sound like a f***ing seventh grader. Did you vote for Obama because he was the first black president too? How simple are you?


Don't be disingenuous. Plenty of people voted for each candidate you name for exactly those reasons and have not been shy about exhorting others to do so, and congratulate themselves for having done so.


Well they're idiots then, clearly. It's the same as voting for GW Bush because you'd like to have a beer with him. It's stupid. No woman I respect pushed others to vote for Hillary because she was the only one in the race with a vagina. You vote for the person who you think will do the best job (and in this case, HRC was the clear winner for anyone with half a brain).


No one was disparaging or questioning your choice to vote for HRC based on her policies. The question was simple - how can you encourage your children to reflect on Hillary's accomplishments and be successful in their own aspirations in their careers and society contributions, when that wasn't a priority in your own life?

I feel bad for your kids. The idea that your value in the world comes from what your career is just about the last lesson I want to impart on my children.


+1.


So you want your kid to think only men can value from their careers, or does your husband stay home to take care of the kids as well?


My kids aren't apparently as stupid as yours; they understand that both parents contribute to keeping the family together regardless of whether they do so inside or outside the home.


Huh? You just said you don"t want your kids to be career driven. Presumably, your husband is career driven or you would not be able to afford being a sah, so,you men you don't want your kid to see women as career driven? Ok, then, we definitely have a very different world view, mine has evolved since 1955.


Not the PP(s) you are quoting but WHAT? THE HECK???? Your interpretation skills are either seriously lacking or you are a complete ass. How in the world do YOU function in the work place or anyplace with this completely obnoxious "you just said (fill in the blank with something that was not said or even implied)" style of non-communication. What a hateful person you seem like. I cannot imagine having to deal with you in rea.


Read your post, you are brimming with hate. Don't you stay at home to avoid stress. Of so, it isn't working.

I don't stay home. I work two jobs. No hate here just frustration and sadness at all of the tearing down going on here. I would feel better about myself if I worked less and could spend more time with my kids. But then I would have to deal with someone like you telling me I am not teaching my kids to be career driven??? That's nuts.
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2017 23:42     Subject: Why are so many women here so angry with / resentful toward women who stay home?

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Nope. Equality is equal pay for equal work. All of you SAHMs are super jealous of WOHMs. We made it, you didn't. You settled for a subservient existence.

Homeschool your daughters if you object. You can teach them useful things like body dsymorphia, yoga, MRS degree, etc... Or just send them to school and they'll pick up on your life choice while you shop at Costco after Pilates.


You sound quite disturbed. And mean. Do the life choices of others really make you angry or is something wrong in YOUR life? Do the world a favor and take a break from DCUM - go do your very important work already. Leave your children with a caring nanny as many hours as possible - they will be better off without your influence. Good lord.


+1.
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2017 23:30     Subject: Why are so many women here so angry with / resentful toward women who stay home?

Anonymous wrote:Nope. Equality is equal pay for equal work. All of you SAHMs are super jealous of WOHMs. We made it, you didn't. You settled for a subservient existence.

Homeschool your daughters if you object. You can teach them useful things like body dsymorphia, yoga, MRS degree, etc... Or just send them to school and they'll pick up on your life choice while you shop at Costco after Pilates.


You sound quite disturbed. And mean. Do the life choices of others really make you angry or is something wrong in YOUR life? Do the world a favor and take a break from DCUM - go do your very important work already. Leave your children with a caring nanny as many hours as possible - they will be better off without your influence. Good lord.
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2017 23:25     Subject: Why are so many women here so angry with / resentful toward women who stay home?

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I think there is some jealous there. In the DC area, one partner has to be making a lot of money to enable the other to stay home and still maintain a nice lifestyle (nice house in a close in nabe, vacations, nice cars, pricey extracurricular activities for the kiddos, maybe private school, etc.)

To have an UMC lifestyle with a SAHP, the breadwinner has to be making 300-400k +.


On my end its less jealous and more...disbelief. I was raised to be independent and to own my own financials. When I went into my marriage I was comfortably set in a career and had two properties free-and-clear. That only helped when we made future decisions together to buy our 'dream' home. It boggles my mind that some women will rely solely on another person's generosity to live their life.

It disturbs me even further when these same women, some of them friends, were die-hard Hillary fans and very much into telling their daughters that 'this will be the first woman president, someone to look up to, someone to emulate' and yet the closest rolemodel to those daughters completely opted out of a career. How can you tell your children to aspire to be the head of NASA or a president or a multi-millionaire CEO, but you didn't bother to do anything yourself?


This last paragraph is 100% how I feel.


Both of you are simpletons then. You *really* can't understand that a woman might agree with and respect Hilary's politics and yet not want to live out her choices on a day to day basis? Talk about scoffing in disbelief. Wow.


Of course you can't see it or you deliberately choose not to. You can't admit that it's ironic for a woman who does nothing professionally - and based on this thread devalues women who do - to go on and on about how amazing it is for a woman to be considered for the most respected professional position in the country?

My favorite is the stay at home moms who push and push their daughters academically (because they have nothing left to do… Live vicariously since life basically ends for them when they push the baby out) yet do nothing using their own academic background, and set no personal professional example. Then they wonder why their daughters dont excel - and end up encouraging "the man is the plan" - and the cycle begins again. 1950s here we come!


OMG. You are a twit. I did not vote for HRC because she has a vagina. Did you really? Because your assumption that other people did is more revealing of your own beliefs in this regard, not mine. I voted for her because I support the kinds of policies she supports and because the alternative wad the kind of bumbling idiot who will get us into war. It had NOTHING to do with the fact that she would have been the first female president. You sound like a f***ing seventh grader. Did you vote for Obama because he was the first black president too? How simple are you?


Don't be disingenuous. Plenty of people voted for each candidate you name for exactly those reasons and have not been shy about exhorting others to do so, and congratulate themselves for having done so.


Well they're idiots then, clearly. It's the same as voting for GW Bush because you'd like to have a beer with him. It's stupid. No woman I respect pushed others to vote for Hillary because she was the only one in the race with a vagina. You vote for the person who you think will do the best job (and in this case, HRC was the clear winner for anyone with half a brain).


No one was disparaging or questioning your choice to vote for HRC based on her policies. The question was simple - how can you encourage your children to reflect on Hillary's accomplishments and be successful in their own aspirations in their careers and society contributions, when that wasn't a priority in your own life?

I feel bad for your kids. The idea that your value in the world comes from what your career is just about the last lesson I want to impart on my children.


+1.


So you want your kid to think only men can value from their careers, or does your husband stay home to take care of the kids as well?


My kids aren't apparently as stupid as yours; they understand that both parents contribute to keeping the family together regardless of whether they do so inside or outside the home.


Huh? You just said you don"t want your kids to be career driven. Presumably, your husband is career driven or you would not be able to afford being a sah, so,you men you don't want your kid to see women as career driven? Ok, then, we definitely have a very different world view, mine has evolved since 1955.


Not the PP(s) you are quoting but WHAT? THE HECK???? Your interpretation skills are either seriously lacking or you are a complete ass. How in the world do YOU function in the work place or anyplace with this completely obnoxious "you just said (fill in the blank with something that was not said or even implied)" style of non-communication. What a hateful person you seem like. I cannot imagine having to deal with you in rea.


Read your post, you are brimming with hate. Don't you stay at home to avoid stress. Of so, it isn't working.
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2017 23:23     Subject: Why are so many women here so angry with / resentful toward women who stay home?

Nope. Equality is equal pay for equal work. All of you SAHMs are super jealous of WOHMs. We made it, you didn't. You settled for a subservient existence.

Homeschool your daughters if you object. You can teach them useful things like body dsymorphia, yoga, MRS degree, etc... Or just send them to school and they'll pick up on your life choice while you shop at Costco after Pilates.
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2017 23:22     Subject: Why are so many women here so angry with / resentful toward women who stay home?

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I think there is some jealous there. In the DC area, one partner has to be making a lot of money to enable the other to stay home and still maintain a nice lifestyle (nice house in a close in nabe, vacations, nice cars, pricey extracurricular activities for the kiddos, maybe private school, etc.)

To have an UMC lifestyle with a SAHP, the breadwinner has to be making 300-400k +.


On my end its less jealous and more...disbelief. I was raised to be independent and to own my own financials. When I went into my marriage I was comfortably set in a career and had two properties free-and-clear. That only helped when we made future decisions together to buy our 'dream' home. It boggles my mind that some women will rely solely on another person's generosity to live their life.

It disturbs me even further when these same women, some of them friends, were die-hard Hillary fans and very much into telling their daughters that 'this will be the first woman president, someone to look up to, someone to emulate' and yet the closest rolemodel to those daughters completely opted out of a career. How can you tell your children to aspire to be the head of NASA or a president or a multi-millionaire CEO, but you didn't bother to do anything yourself?


This last paragraph is 100% how I feel.


Both of you are simpletons then. You *really* can't understand that a woman might agree with and respect Hilary's politics and yet not want to live out her choices on a day to day basis? Talk about scoffing in disbelief. Wow.


Of course you can't see it or you deliberately choose not to. You can't admit that it's ironic for a woman who does nothing professionally - and based on this thread devalues women who do - to go on and on about how amazing it is for a woman to be considered for the most respected professional position in the country?

My favorite is the stay at home moms who push and push their daughters academically (because they have nothing left to do… Live vicariously since life basically ends for them when they push the baby out) yet do nothing using their own academic background, and set no personal professional example. Then they wonder why their daughters dont excel - and end up encouraging "the man is the plan" - and the cycle begins again. 1950s here we come!


OMG. You are a twit. I did not vote for HRC because she has a vagina. Did you really? Because your assumption that other people did is more revealing of your own beliefs in this regard, not mine. I voted for her because I support the kinds of policies she supports and because the alternative wad the kind of bumbling idiot who will get us into war. It had NOTHING to do with the fact that she would have been the first female president. You sound like a f***ing seventh grader. Did you vote for Obama because he was the first black president too? How simple are you?


Don't be disingenuous. Plenty of people voted for each candidate you name for exactly those reasons and have not been shy about exhorting others to do so, and congratulate themselves for having done so.


Well they're idiots then, clearly. It's the same as voting for GW Bush because you'd like to have a beer with him. It's stupid. No woman I respect pushed others to vote for Hillary because she was the only one in the race with a vagina. You vote for the person who you think will do the best job (and in this case, HRC was the clear winner for anyone with half a brain).


No one was disparaging or questioning your choice to vote for HRC based on her policies. The question was simple - how can you encourage your children to reflect on Hillary's accomplishments and be successful in their own aspirations in their careers and society contributions, when that wasn't a priority in your own life?

I feel bad for your kids. The idea that your value in the world comes from what your career is just about the last lesson I want to impart on my children.


+1.


So you want your kid to think only men can value from their careers, or does your husband stay home to take care of the kids as well?


My kids aren't apparently as stupid as yours; they understand that both parents contribute to keeping the family together regardless of whether they do so inside or outside the home.


Huh? You just said you don"t want your kids to be career driven. Presumably, your husband is career driven or you would not be able to afford being a sah, so,you men you don't want your kid to see women as career driven? Ok, then, we definitely have a very different world view, mine has evolved since 1955.


Not the PP(s) you are quoting but WHAT? THE HECK???? Your interpretation skills are either seriously lacking or you are a complete ass. How in the world do YOU function in the work place or anyplace with this completely obnoxious "you just said (fill in the blank with something that was not said or even implied)" style of non-communication. What a hateful person you seem like. I cannot imagine having to deal with you in real life.
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2017 21:56     Subject: Why are so many women here so angry with / resentful toward women who stay home?

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Have any of you heard of a third wave feminist? Well, I consider myself a fourth wave feminist. I do what I want, how I want to do it. I am equal in mental capacity to any equivalently educated male and physically dominate over a good percentage of them. If I want to work, I work. If I want to stay home and eat meat that my man makes me, I do that. I will either homeschool my kids with organic handmade toys or ship them off to Phillips Andover at 13. I don't follow the rule of some woman who spent 20 years earning the approval of her teachers and now can't function outside of an accomplishment based system. I am going to take my masters degree and troll Harris teeter in lululemon all f-ing day. My life. My choice. Period.


+1. The feminists who are trying to turn women into corporate worker bees aren't the feminists who speak for my family.

For me feminism means working to give women choices, and then allowing them to make them. Live and let live.


I think most of us agree with this, then a sah writes a post saying that woman who work when they have young children don't have appropriate values. That sparks resentment obviously, I can see that clearly, and I did not return to work until my kids were in school. Personally, I stayed home for me, my kids are as happy and well adjusted with a nanny as they were with me.
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2017 21:54     Subject: Why are so many women here so angry with / resentful toward women who stay home?

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I think there is some jealous there. In the DC area, one partner has to be making a lot of money to enable the other to stay home and still maintain a nice lifestyle (nice house in a close in nabe, vacations, nice cars, pricey extracurricular activities for the kiddos, maybe private school, etc.)

To have an UMC lifestyle with a SAHP, the breadwinner has to be making 300-400k +.


On my end its less jealous and more...disbelief. I was raised to be independent and to own my own financials. When I went into my marriage I was comfortably set in a career and had two properties free-and-clear. That only helped when we made future decisions together to buy our 'dream' home. It boggles my mind that some women will rely solely on another person's generosity to live their life.

It disturbs me even further when these same women, some of them friends, were die-hard Hillary fans and very much into telling their daughters that 'this will be the first woman president, someone to look up to, someone to emulate' and yet the closest rolemodel to those daughters completely opted out of a career. How can you tell your children to aspire to be the head of NASA or a president or a multi-millionaire CEO, but you didn't bother to do anything yourself?


This last paragraph is 100% how I feel.


Both of you are simpletons then. You *really* can't understand that a woman might agree with and respect Hilary's politics and yet not want to live out her choices on a day to day basis? Talk about scoffing in disbelief. Wow.


Of course you can't see it or you deliberately choose not to. You can't admit that it's ironic for a woman who does nothing professionally - and based on this thread devalues women who do - to go on and on about how amazing it is for a woman to be considered for the most respected professional position in the country?

My favorite is the stay at home moms who push and push their daughters academically (because they have nothing left to do… Live vicariously since life basically ends for them when they push the baby out) yet do nothing using their own academic background, and set no personal professional example. Then they wonder why their daughters dont excel - and end up encouraging "the man is the plan" - and the cycle begins again. 1950s here we come!


OMG. You are a twit. I did not vote for HRC because she has a vagina. Did you really? Because your assumption that other people did is more revealing of your own beliefs in this regard, not mine. I voted for her because I support the kinds of policies she supports and because the alternative wad the kind of bumbling idiot who will get us into war. It had NOTHING to do with the fact that she would have been the first female president. You sound like a f***ing seventh grader. Did you vote for Obama because he was the first black president too? How simple are you?


Don't be disingenuous. Plenty of people voted for each candidate you name for exactly those reasons and have not been shy about exhorting others to do so, and congratulate themselves for having done so.


Well they're idiots then, clearly. It's the same as voting for GW Bush because you'd like to have a beer with him. It's stupid. No woman I respect pushed others to vote for Hillary because she was the only one in the race with a vagina. You vote for the person who you think will do the best job (and in this case, HRC was the clear winner for anyone with half a brain).


No one was disparaging or questioning your choice to vote for HRC based on her policies. The question was simple - how can you encourage your children to reflect on Hillary's accomplishments and be successful in their own aspirations in their careers and society contributions, when that wasn't a priority in your own life?

I feel bad for your kids. The idea that your value in the world comes from what your career is just about the last lesson I want to impart on my children.


+1.


So you want your kid to think only men can value from their careers, or does your husband stay home to take care of the kids as well?


My kids aren't apparently as stupid as yours; they understand that both parents contribute to keeping the family together regardless of whether they do so inside or outside the home.


Huh? You just said you don"t want your kids to be career driven. Presumably, your husband is career driven or you would not be able to afford being a sah, so,you men you don't want your kid to see women as career driven? Ok, then, we definitely have a very different world view, mine has evolved since 1955.


My husband makes less than the median HHI from his day job. If you call that "career driven", go for it. We want our kids to be happy, regardless of how little or how much they make.


Sweetie, everyone wants their kids to be happy.


If that's the case, then why does it matter if my kids see men or women as career driven or not, honey?


x100.


??? more non sequitors, you were the one impugning women who were career driven.
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2017 21:53     Subject: Why are so many women here so angry with / resentful toward women who stay home?

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Have any of you heard of a third wave feminist? Well, I consider myself a fourth wave feminist. I do what I want, how I want to do it. I am equal in mental capacity to any equivalently educated male and physically dominate over a good percentage of them. If I want to work, I work. If I want to stay home and eat meat that my man makes me, I do that. I will either homeschool my kids with organic handmade toys or ship them off to Phillips Andover at 13. I don't follow the rule of some woman who spent 20 years earning the approval of her teachers and now can't function outside of an accomplishment based system. I am going to take my masters degree and troll Harris teeter in lululemon all f-ing day. My life. My choice. Period.


+1. The feminists who are trying to turn women into corporate worker bees aren't the feminists who speak for my family.

For me feminism means working to give women choices, and then allowing them to make them. Live and let live.

Yes, thank you! Feminism isn't about working vs. not working. It's about giving women CHOICES that work best for their families and their happiness. At this point in time, it works best for my family that I stay home. Five years ago, it worked best for me to work.
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2017 21:50     Subject: Why are so many women here so angry with / resentful toward women who stay home?

Anonymous wrote:Have any of you heard of a third wave feminist? Well, I consider myself a fourth wave feminist. I do what I want, how I want to do it. I am equal in mental capacity to any equivalently educated male and physically dominate over a good percentage of them. If I want to work, I work. If I want to stay home and eat meat that my man makes me, I do that. I will either homeschool my kids with organic handmade toys or ship them off to Phillips Andover at 13. I don't follow the rule of some woman who spent 20 years earning the approval of her teachers and now can't function outside of an accomplishment based system. I am going to take my masters degree and troll Harris teeter in lululemon all f-ing day. My life. My choice. Period.


+1. The feminists who are trying to turn women into corporate worker bees aren't the feminists who speak for my family.

For me feminism means working to give women choices, and then allowing them to make them. Live and let live.
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2017 21:46     Subject: Why are so many women here so angry with / resentful toward women who stay home?

Anonymous wrote:Have any of you heard of a third wave feminist? Well, I consider myself a fourth wave feminist. I do what I want, how I want to do it. I am equal in mental capacity to any equivalently educated male and physically dominate over a good percentage of them. If I want to work, I work. If I want to stay home and eat meat that my man makes me, I do that. I will either homeschool my kids with organic handmade toys or ship them off to Phillips Andover at 13. I don't follow the rule of some woman who spent 20 years earning the approval of her teachers and now can't function outside of an accomplishment based system. I am going to take my masters degree and troll Harris teeter in lululemon all f-ing day. My life. My choice. Period.



I like you PP!
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2017 21:42     Subject: Why are so many women here so angry with / resentful toward women who stay home?

Anonymous wrote:
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Anonymous wrote:I think there is some jealous there. In the DC area, one partner has to be making a lot of money to enable the other to stay home and still maintain a nice lifestyle (nice house in a close in nabe, vacations, nice cars, pricey extracurricular activities for the kiddos, maybe private school, etc.)

To have an UMC lifestyle with a SAHP, the breadwinner has to be making 300-400k +.


On my end its less jealous and more...disbelief. I was raised to be independent and to own my own financials. When I went into my marriage I was comfortably set in a career and had two properties free-and-clear. That only helped when we made future decisions together to buy our 'dream' home. It boggles my mind that some women will rely solely on another person's generosity to live their life.

It disturbs me even further when these same women, some of them friends, were die-hard Hillary fans and very much into telling their daughters that 'this will be the first woman president, someone to look up to, someone to emulate' and yet the closest rolemodel to those daughters completely opted out of a career. How can you tell your children to aspire to be the head of NASA or a president or a multi-millionaire CEO, but you didn't bother to do anything yourself?


This last paragraph is 100% how I feel.


Both of you are simpletons then. You *really* can't understand that a woman might agree with and respect Hilary's politics and yet not want to live out her choices on a day to day basis? Talk about scoffing in disbelief. Wow.


Of course you can't see it or you deliberately choose not to. You can't admit that it's ironic for a woman who does nothing professionally - and based on this thread devalues women who do - to go on and on about how amazing it is for a woman to be considered for the most respected professional position in the country?

My favorite is the stay at home moms who push and push their daughters academically (because they have nothing left to do… Live vicariously since life basically ends for them when they push the baby out) yet do nothing using their own academic background, and set no personal professional example. Then they wonder why their daughters dont excel - and end up encouraging "the man is the plan" - and the cycle begins again. 1950s here we come!


OMG. You are a twit. I did not vote for HRC because she has a vagina. Did you really? Because your assumption that other people did is more revealing of your own beliefs in this regard, not mine. I voted for her because I support the kinds of policies she supports and because the alternative wad the kind of bumbling idiot who will get us into war. It had NOTHING to do with the fact that she would have been the first female president. You sound like a f***ing seventh grader. Did you vote for Obama because he was the first black president too? How simple are you?


Don't be disingenuous. Plenty of people voted for each candidate you name for exactly those reasons and have not been shy about exhorting others to do so, and congratulate themselves for having done so.


Well they're idiots then, clearly. It's the same as voting for GW Bush because you'd like to have a beer with him. It's stupid. No woman I respect pushed others to vote for Hillary because she was the only one in the race with a vagina. You vote for the person who you think will do the best job (and in this case, HRC was the clear winner for anyone with half a brain).


No one was disparaging or questioning your choice to vote for HRC based on her policies. The question was simple - how can you encourage your children to reflect on Hillary's accomplishments and be successful in their own aspirations in their careers and society contributions, when that wasn't a priority in your own life?

I feel bad for your kids. The idea that your value in the world comes from what your career is just about the last lesson I want to impart on my children.


+1.


So you want your kid to think only men can value from their careers, or does your husband stay home to take care of the kids as well?


My kids aren't apparently as stupid as yours; they understand that both parents contribute to keeping the family together regardless of whether they do so inside or outside the home.


Huh? You just said you don"t want your kids to be career driven. Presumably, your husband is career driven or you would not be able to afford being a sah, so,you men you don't want your kid to see women as career driven? Ok, then, we definitely have a very different world view, mine has evolved since 1955.


My husband makes less than the median HHI from his day job. If you call that "career driven", go for it. We want our kids to be happy, regardless of how little or how much they make.


Sweetie, everyone wants their kids to be happy.


If that's the case, then why does it matter if my kids see men or women as career driven or not, honey?


x100.
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2017 21:38     Subject: Why are so many women here so angry with / resentful toward women who stay home?

Anonymous wrote:
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Anonymous wrote:I think there is some jealous there. In the DC area, one partner has to be making a lot of money to enable the other to stay home and still maintain a nice lifestyle (nice house in a close in nabe, vacations, nice cars, pricey extracurricular activities for the kiddos, maybe private school, etc.)

To have an UMC lifestyle with a SAHP, the breadwinner has to be making 300-400k +.


On my end its less jealous and more...disbelief. I was raised to be independent and to own my own financials. When I went into my marriage I was comfortably set in a career and had two properties free-and-clear. That only helped when we made future decisions together to buy our 'dream' home. It boggles my mind that some women will rely solely on another person's generosity to live their life.

It disturbs me even further when these same women, some of them friends, were die-hard Hillary fans and very much into telling their daughters that 'this will be the first woman president, someone to look up to, someone to emulate' and yet the closest rolemodel to those daughters completely opted out of a career. How can you tell your children to aspire to be the head of NASA or a president or a multi-millionaire CEO, but you didn't bother to do anything yourself?


This last paragraph is 100% how I feel.


Both of you are simpletons then. You *really* can't understand that a woman might agree with and respect Hilary's politics and yet not want to live out her choices on a day to day basis? Talk about scoffing in disbelief. Wow.


Of course you can't see it or you deliberately choose not to. You can't admit that it's ironic for a woman who does nothing professionally - and based on this thread devalues women who do - to go on and on about how amazing it is for a woman to be considered for the most respected professional position in the country?

My favorite is the stay at home moms who push and push their daughters academically (because they have nothing left to do… Live vicariously since life basically ends for them when they push the baby out) yet do nothing using their own academic background, and set no personal professional example. Then they wonder why their daughters dont excel - and end up encouraging "the man is the plan" - and the cycle begins again. 1950s here we come!


OMG. You are a twit. I did not vote for HRC because she has a vagina. Did you really? Because your assumption that other people did is more revealing of your own beliefs in this regard, not mine. I voted for her because I support the kinds of policies she supports and because the alternative wad the kind of bumbling idiot who will get us into war. It had NOTHING to do with the fact that she would have been the first female president. You sound like a f***ing seventh grader. Did you vote for Obama because he was the first black president too? How simple are you?


Don't be disingenuous. Plenty of people voted for each candidate you name for exactly those reasons and have not been shy about exhorting others to do so, and congratulate themselves for having done so.


Well they're idiots then, clearly. It's the same as voting for GW Bush because you'd like to have a beer with him. It's stupid. No woman I respect pushed others to vote for Hillary because she was the only one in the race with a vagina. You vote for the person who you think will do the best job (and in this case, HRC was the clear winner for anyone with half a brain).


No one was disparaging or questioning your choice to vote for HRC based on her policies. The question was simple - how can you encourage your children to reflect on Hillary's accomplishments and be successful in their own aspirations in their careers and society contributions, when that wasn't a priority in your own life?

I feel bad for your kids. The idea that your value in the world comes from what your career is just about the last lesson I want to impart on my children.


+1.


So you want your kid to think only men can value from their careers, or does your husband stay home to take care of the kids as well?


My kids aren't apparently as stupid as yours; they understand that both parents contribute to keeping the family together regardless of whether they do so inside or outside the home.


Huh? You just said you don"t want your kids to be career driven. Presumably, your husband is career driven or you would not be able to afford being a sah, so,you men you don't want your kid to see women as career driven? Ok, then, we definitely have a very different world view, mine has evolved since 1955.


My husband makes less than the median HHI from his day job. If you call that "career driven", go for it. We want our kids to be happy, regardless of how little or how much they make.


Sweetie, everyone wants their kids to be happy.


If that's the case, then why does it matter if my kids see men or women as career driven or not, honey?