Anonymous wrote:That you are a really nice guy, a wonderful friend, partner, and father but that I am madly in love with another man. If it weren't for our children I would end the marriage.

Does the other man know?

Anonymous wrote:I have never orgasmed with him.

Grounds for divorce. I'm serious.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:to 15:40 - you have no idea what you're talking about. This is a quick little DCUM thread that can't begin to get to the bottom of the issues.

True, I have no idea what the finer details are, but the basic premise that if you don't tell your partner what you need you can't expect them to give it to you is indisputable. Now, if the reason a woman doesn't tell her husband he doesn't make her cum is because he'll respond by beating the crap out of her, for example, then complaining about the lack of O is like complaining about the food when you're on death row.

One of the PPs here. We've definitely talked about our sex life and how it things aren't all that much fun for me. Thing is, he's just really bad in the sack and has a small penis. His efforts wind up with me being pawed about, with not much sensitivity. I love him to pieces - this is the one glaring hole in our marriage, so I live with it.

So just a suggestion. Next time you are rolling around, suggest trying something new. Tell him he get to be in charge and teach you everything he wants done. The hope is, the time after, he will let you be in charge. Given that good sex for a woman is so often driven by mental state, you have built a wall where your mind is no longer open to the possibility of being turned on by him. In order to give your satisfaction a chance, you need to mix things up and open your mind (and hopefully his). If you react to things you enjoy, he should find himself getting turned on by that. Hope it helps.

Anonymous wrote:Brush your teeth before going to bed. Seriously. Last night was like kissing a taco and was a real turn-off. This from a DH.

Yum. Tacos! Lucky girl

I silently call mine "Princess" when he's in one of those drama queen/martyr/sulky/woosy modes. "How are you doing, (Princess)?"

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That when he whines and plays the victim for some really really absurd reason I wouldn't tolerate even for a child, I want to yell at him "MAN UP For Christ sake you are a unappealing pussy".

But I don't, because I love him, don't yell or say nasty words as a principle, and I know his ego cannot handle the idea that he acts "like a pussy"... But damn does it feel tempting...

Are you living with my husband? Is it possible he has two houses and two families?

DH here. This a great thread (really). I am inspired to lose some weight and be a bit more forceful (manly?) with my wife, for her own benefit. I haven't exactly been a push over, and I don't whine, but its clear that -- for physical attraction, at least -- women are looking more for Christian Grey than for Steve Martin.

Steve Martin is nerd hot ...
http://www.askmen.com/top_10/entertainment/top-10-saturday-night-live-sketches_7.html

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That DH's high school friend/ex short term gf is nice and all but that I think her twice yearly 'pleasant emails' are, in part, to keep her foot in the door in case I screw up or die or whatever and it's just kind of obvious. That I remember him telling me that her husband sucks in bed and has a lot of hang ups and, well, he doesn't so it's like she's a vulture circling...

Wow. That's exactly what she's doing. Not being sarcastic.

She's such a nit-wit....?

She's such a nit-wit ... No question mark there that was definitely a typo.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That DH's high school friend/ex short term gf is nice and all but that I think her twice yearly 'pleasant emails' are, in part, to keep her foot in the door in case I screw up or die or whatever and it's just kind of obvious. That I remember him telling me that her husband sucks in bed and has a lot of hang ups and, well, he doesn't so it's like she's a vulture circling...

Wow. That's exactly what she's doing. Not being sarcastic.

She's such a nit-wit....?

Anonymous wrote:That DH's high school friend/ex short term gf is nice and all but that I think her twice yearly 'pleasant emails' are, in part, to keep her foot in the door in case I screw up or die or whatever and it's just kind of obvious. That I remember him telling me that her husband sucks in bed and has a lot of hang ups and, well, he doesn't so it's like she's a vulture circling...

Wow. That's exactly what she's doing. Not being sarcastic.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have lied about my number of sexual partners for almost 20 years. Told the lie once and never found a way to tell the truth. And he is totally one that will be hurt by the dishonesty even 20 years later. Wish that I was mature enough to go with the "none of your business" line at the time.

I am convinced that when I am old and forgetful that I will let it slip.

What did you tell him vs. the true number?

Told him 2, real number is 7.

Um, you're wasting a whole lot of angst over 5 partners?

Goes to honesty. My DW told me two then a few years later let slip that there was a third. Why would she have lied about him to begin with? I have to assume that there were more than that.

This goes to your being crazy!! That's her personal life BEFORE you, you have no right to know anything about it and a decent man wouldn't ask.

What's crazy is that I never asked about her number, she volunteered the information and then volunteered a different number some years later. Same as finding out about how endowed one of those guys was compared to me. I didn't ask because it's something I absolutely did not want to know. She volunteered that information as well. She tends to speak without thinking. A lot.

Funny....

That DH's high school friend/ex short term gf is nice and all but that I think her twice yearly 'pleasant emails' are, in part, to keep her foot in the door in case I screw up or die or whatever and it's just kind of obvious. That I remember him telling me that her husband sucks in bed and has a lot of hang ups and, well, he doesn't so it's like she's a vulture circling...

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a DW and would like to tell him that I'm open to FMF threesomes BUT I'm scared that if we actually go through with it he might like the other woman more than me.

So divorce him and marry me. I promise I won't like her more than you. I promise. Pinky promise. Even if its FFFMFFF, you'll still be on top.

Haha I like you

Anonymous wrote:I'm a DW and would like to tell him that I'm open to FMF threesomes BUT I'm scared that if we actually go through with it he might like the other woman more than me.

So divorce him and marry me. I promise I won't like her more than you. I promise. Pinky promise. Even if its FFFMFFF, you'll still be on top.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have lied about my number of sexual partners for almost 20 years. Told the lie once and never found a way to tell the truth. And he is totally one that will be hurt by the dishonesty even 20 years later. Wish that I was mature enough to go with the "none of your business" line at the time.

I am convinced that when I am old and forgetful that I will let it slip.

What did you tell him vs. the true number?

Told him 2, real number is 7.

Um, you're wasting a whole lot of angst over 5 partners?

Goes to honesty. My DW told me two then a few years later let slip that there was a third. Why would she have lied about him to begin with? I have to assume that there were more than that.

Lol, then I'm glad I honestly told my now-DH the number (17) at the start. But it has never come up since.

I'm a DW and would like to tell him that I'm open to FMF threesomes BUT I'm scared that if we actually go through with it he might like the other woman more than me.