He's your EX. Why do you care? Why are you even still thinking about him??

Anonymous wrote:I know this is an old thread, but maybe some of the hammers in the Relationships forum should take a read and realize what their future might look like if they keep up the nagging and bitterness and never show their husbands any appreciation or tenderness.

lol. that's what you get from this thread?

I know this is an old thread, but maybe some of the hammers in the Relationships forum should take a read and realize what their future might look like if they keep up the nagging and bitterness and never show their husbands any appreciation or tenderness.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Take heart that you will always be their mother. They will love you no matter what.

Not if the step mom is happier, more loving, and nicer to be around!

Totally untrue. My MIL is by all accounts a difficult person to be around (although she has many good qualities). My S-MIL is totally different: warm, empathetic, funny, engaging ... her polar opposite. But although we do love S-MIL, there's no question who is the real mom and the real grandma.

Anonymous wrote:Take heart that you will always be their mother. They will love you no matter what.

Not if the step mom is happier, more loving, and nicer to be around!

OP - I hope you can realize that although being a super homemaker may not be your cup of tea, that is not what makes a great mom. Figure out what makes you, "you" and nurture and celebrate that. You can be a fantastic mom without having to compete with your kids' stepmom. Celebrate what she does well and celebrate what you do well and create your own memories with your kids (without instant photo books of what you do!)

OP?! Any update?

OP, how is it going?

You said yourself that you are opposite ends of a spectrum. It’s okay to feel pangs of jealousy as long as you keep perspective and not let that jealousy get you to make comparisons. You are inherently not alike. An apple cannot be an orange ever. The best thing you can do is face whatever feelings in yourself that the jealousy is bringing up. THOSE are what is holding you back, not her. If her lifestyle shows you that you have an unreasonable temper, level of cleanliness, disregard for something, whatever - and that is bothering you, then work on making changes to benefit your own life. It’s okay if she is different. Different isn't necessarily better unless you recognize it as such and WANT to be different. Your kids are benefiting in the long run from having both of you.

I'll admit I didn't read the entire thread. OP, we are in a VERY similar situation. I am so undescribably grateful to the stepmom. She is an amazing person and has really enhanced everyone's life. I'd be so so mad if my ex messed things up with her.

Anonymous wrote:You are all posting in a troll thread.

OP had me until she added a detail about the fictional stepmom giving her a photobook of what the kids did on the Pacific Northwest trip as soon as they returned from the trip. At what point in that clearly busy and full trip did the stepmom have the opportunity to sort through photos of the entire two weeks, choose the good ones, print them, and organize them into a photo book?

Good job trolling, OP. It's the little details that get us every time, but you did try hard.

Good catch. Definitely a troll. I always wonder why someone makes up a whole thread.

Oh, you are a doctor! Well, that's impressive! If he was home with the kids and you are a dr out working all the time, that explains a lot. Someone has to be a breadwinner, while someone else stays home with the kids.

She may seem to be a better wife and mother, but you put all that time and effort into becoming a Doctor which isn't easy!

I have been a wonderful wife and mother, but I don't have a medical degree! Not many people do!