Anonymous
Post 05/17/2014 17:31     Subject: Depressed over lifestyle
This thread is why I find this forum so utterly FASCINATING. It accurately reflects the psyche of the metro DC female.
Anonymous
Post 05/16/2014 13:50     Subject: Re:Depressed over lifestyle
Anonymous wrote:I find the logic that people can't "afford" kids to be strange.

Even people who make $300K a year make choices about what to do with their money. No one can have it all. Some people choose to spend their money on kids. Some choose to spend their money on a McMansion. Some choose to not work. And on and on...

If you want a family, you make the choices that make that possible--EVEN if you make $50K a year and EVEN if you live in the DC-area.


I find the fact that you can't read between the lines strange...

When people say this, they of course mean they can't afford to provide their kids a lifestyle that the believe and desire for them to have.

Anonymous
Post 05/15/2014 20:19     Subject: Re:Depressed over lifestyle
I find the logic that people can't "afford" kids to be strange.

Even people who make $300K a year make choices about what to do with their money. No one can have it all. Some people choose to spend their money on kids. Some choose to spend their money on a McMansion. Some choose to not work. And on and on...

If you want a family, you make the choices that make that possible--EVEN if you make $50K a year and EVEN if you live in the DC-area.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2014 12:14     Subject: Depressed over lifestyle
Anonymous wrote:We are HHI of $130k (two teachers)

we have three kids (all in daycare) plus a mortgage.

I don't get the "can only have one kid" argument. We are doing just fine. We can't go out to eat or take weekend vacations, but I would rather have more than one kid than do that anyway.


That's because some people feel they have to keep with the joneses, or are just materialistic and want the latest and greatest. It's all about what YOU think is important.

If a person has a decent house that is not falling apart, in a decent school district and neighborhood, a little bit of savings, enough food to eat, and no health issues in the family, I think you have it pretty made compared to the majority of Americans. Anything more is gravy. It's all relative.

Unless you are consistently on Forbes #1 Richest in the world, there will always be people with more than you.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2014 12:05     Subject: Depressed over lifestyle
We are HHI of $130k (two teachers)

we have three kids (all in daycare) plus a mortgage.

I don't get the "can only have one kid" argument. We are doing just fine. We can't go out to eat or take weekend vacations, but I would rather have more than one kid than do that anyway.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2014 12:03     Subject: Depressed over lifestyle
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If it makes you feel better, at least you have the husband! I don't, so I'm trying to raise my daughter in an expensive area on less than $100K salary. And no time/money to date since I have primary (most days) custody.) Most of my friends are either married with kids and pretty well-off or single and child-free and pretty well-off. I don't get to do much either.

Feel better? It could be worse. And this could be temporary. Try to see it as a phase on the way to better things.


These "my life is worse than yours" posts are so annoying. Have some empathy and let OP be sad or move along.


Oh whoa! OP posts a whiny lament, dripping in self-pity, incapable of doing anything to solve her own problems (like go and earn your own money if you're dissatisifed with your HHI). Seems like OP would benefit from a little perspective.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2014 07:34     Subject: Depressed over lifestyle
Anonymous wrote:If it makes you feel better, at least you have the husband! I don't, so I'm trying to raise my daughter in an expensive area on less than $100K salary. And no time/money to date since I have primary (most days) custody.) Most of my friends are either married with kids and pretty well-off or single and child-free and pretty well-off. I don't get to do much either.

Feel better? It could be worse. And this could be temporary. Try to see it as a phase on the way to better things.


These "my life is worse than yours" posts are so annoying. Have some empathy and let OP be sad or move along.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2014 06:21     Subject: Depressed over lifestyle
I don't feel sorry for you, OP.

My dad was a millionaire a few times over when I was growing up. And that's when $1m meant something.

His health took a nose dive, and so did their savings. Mom is healthy and living modestly. Her house is paid for, which is a blessing.

By comparison, my husband and I have a modest HHI. So how I once lived is nothing compared to how I live now.

Such is life.

Get over it.
Anonymous
Post 05/11/2014 20:18     Subject: Depressed over lifestyle
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:$150K is pretty modest in D.C. Not elsewhere.

I feel for the OP - I was raised in the 70s and 80s by a SAHM who never had to think about how to pay the bills. When she worked, it was for fun, not to bolster the family's income. My husband and I have friends with family money, they recently bought a new multimillion-dollar home without needing to sell their old one first. Aware as I am that I enjoy so much good fortune, it's hard to not feel envious of people who never have to worry about money. They want something, they buy it. They need something, they're covered.

My husband is building assets but not bringing in a lot of cash. I'm not proud to admit that I feel sour about it. Our first baby is on the way and it saddens me to think that we might not be able to give it everything we hope to - like a sibling, or summer camp, or a full ride to college.


And what are you doing to improve your family finances?


I take on freelance work whenever I can. I spend very little. I drive an 18-year-old car. I consistently move bits of extra money into savings. He is also thrifty, and he works very hard. His work will start paying off in a few years, things are just tight for us now.


Get a full-time job, or stop complaining. God, the entitlement of some women...


+1. Very retro group of ladies posting on this thread. Real women make their own bank when they need to.


+1

You want money? Go make some money!
Anonymous
Post 05/11/2014 20:16     Subject: Depressed over lifestyle
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:$150K is pretty modest in D.C. Not elsewhere.

I feel for the OP - I was raised in the 70s and 80s by a SAHM who never had to think about how to pay the bills. When she worked, it was for fun, not to bolster the family's income. My husband and I have friends with family money, they recently bought a new multimillion-dollar home without needing to sell their old one first. Aware as I am that I enjoy so much good fortune, it's hard to not feel envious of people who never have to worry about money. They want something, they buy it. They need something, they're covered.

My husband is building assets but not bringing in a lot of cash. I'm not proud to admit that I feel sour about it. Our first baby is on the way and it saddens me to think that we might not be able to give it everything we hope to - like a sibling, or summer camp, or a full ride to college.


And what are you doing to improve your family finances?


I take on freelance work whenever I can. I spend very little. I drive an 18-year-old car. I consistently move bits of extra money into savings. He is also thrifty, and he works very hard. His work will start paying off in a few years, things are just tight for us now.


Get a full-time job, or stop complaining. God, the entitlement of some women...


Sorry, judgmental jerks, maybe I wasn't clear: I work full time AND freelance after hours whenever I can. I am pregnant and will continue to work full time after a short maternity leave.


You feel "sour" about your DH not bringing in much cash, but it sounds like you don't make much yourself. Why direct your sour feelings at him?
Anonymous
Post 05/11/2014 20:16     Subject: Depressed over lifestyle
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:$150K is pretty modest in D.C. Not elsewhere.

I feel for the OP - I was raised in the 70s and 80s by a SAHM who never had to think about how to pay the bills. When she worked, it was for fun, not to bolster the family's income. My husband and I have friends with family money, they recently bought a new multimillion-dollar home without needing to sell their old one first. Aware as I am that I enjoy so much good fortune, it's hard to not feel envious of people who never have to worry about money. They want something, they buy it. They need something, they're covered.

My husband is building assets but not bringing in a lot of cash. I'm not proud to admit that I feel sour about it. Our first baby is on the way and it saddens me to think that we might not be able to give it everything we hope to - like a sibling, or summer camp, or a full ride to college.


And what are you doing to improve your family finances?


I take on freelance work whenever I can. I spend very little. I drive an 18-year-old car. I consistently move bits of extra money into savings. He is also thrifty, and he works very hard. His work will start paying off in a few years, things are just tight for us now.


You feel "sour" about your DH not bringing in much cash, but it sounds like you don't make much yourself. Why direct your sour feelings at him?

Get a full-time job, or stop complaining. God, the entitlement of some women...


Sorry, judgmental jerks, maybe I wasn't clear: I work full time AND freelance after hours whenever I can. I am pregnant and will continue to work full time after a short maternity leave.
Anonymous
Post 05/11/2014 15:41     Subject: Depressed over lifestyle

Sorry, judgmental jerks, maybe I wasn't clear: I work full time AND freelance after hours whenever I can. I am pregnant and will continue to work full time after a short maternity leave.



Dear Poster, not site if you are op or in a similar position, but I did the same thing for two pregnancies and worked 70hrs a wk the following year. I just have a bunch of health issues now and am no better off. I didn't earn as much as I thought I would after taxes and haven't gotten to spend any time with my kids. I wanted to help is buy another house. Isn't working out. am now considering divorce but know that would cost even more money. The DC area is a hellhole and not worth living in.
Anonymous
Post 05/10/2014 22:16     Subject: Depressed over lifestyle
Chill out or you may lose your family and your $ through divorce.
Anonymous
Post 05/10/2014 10:37     Subject: Depressed over lifestyle
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:$150K is pretty modest in D.C. Not elsewhere.

I feel for the OP - I was raised in the 70s and 80s by a SAHM who never had to think about how to pay the bills. When she worked, it was for fun, not to bolster the family's income. My husband and I have friends with family money, they recently bought a new multimillion-dollar home without needing to sell their old one first. Aware as I am that I enjoy so much good fortune, it's hard to not feel envious of people who never have to worry about money. They want something, they buy it. They need something, they're covered.

My husband is building assets but not bringing in a lot of cash. I'm not proud to admit that I feel sour about it. Our first baby is on the way and it saddens me to think that we might not be able to give it everything we hope to - like a sibling, or summer camp, or a full ride to college.


And what are you doing to improve your family finances?


I take on freelance work whenever I can. I spend very little. I drive an 18-year-old car. I consistently move bits of extra money into savings. He is also thrifty, and he works very hard. His work will start paying off in a few years, things are just tight for us now.


Get a full-time job, or stop complaining. God, the entitlement of some women...


Sorry, judgmental jerks, maybe I wasn't clear: I work full time AND freelance after hours whenever I can. I am pregnant and will continue to work full time after a short maternity leave.


No, you weren't clear. And you were focused on your husband's inability to bring in enough money to satisfy you, without mentioning that apparently you can't manage it either.
Anonymous
Post 05/10/2014 10:05     Subject: Depressed over lifestyle
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:$150K is pretty modest in D.C. Not elsewhere.

I feel for the OP - I was raised in the 70s and 80s by a SAHM who never had to think about how to pay the bills. When she worked, it was for fun, not to bolster the family's income. My husband and I have friends with family money, they recently bought a new multimillion-dollar home without needing to sell their old one first. Aware as I am that I enjoy so much good fortune, it's hard to not feel envious of people who never have to worry about money. They want something, they buy it. They need something, they're covered.

My husband is building assets but not bringing in a lot of cash. I'm not proud to admit that I feel sour about it. Our first baby is on the way and it saddens me to think that we might not be able to give it everything we hope to - like a sibling, or summer camp, or a full ride to college.


And what are you doing to improve your family finances?


I take on freelance work whenever I can. I spend very little. I drive an 18-year-old car. I consistently move bits of extra money into savings. He is also thrifty, and he works very hard. His work will start paying off in a few years, things are just tight for us now.


Get a full-time job, or stop complaining. God, the entitlement of some women...


Sorry, judgmental jerks, maybe I wasn't clear: I work full time AND freelance after hours whenever I can. I am pregnant and will continue to work full time after a short maternity leave.