Anonymous
12/03/2025 13:54
Subject: Can I be honest? I don’t care much about my friends kids college announcements
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I love seeing them. This is so weird. I have two in college about to graduate and I still love seeing where kids land.
Why? Why do you care? Why do you think it matters at all? Especially if it's not your kid? I'm genuinely curious.
This is pretty sad. How can the idea of pleasure over your friends achievements be such a foreign concept?
DP.
Here’s the thing. Pleasure is great but you’re being dishonest if you don’t admit that there’s a huge element of narcissistic bragging at play for many parents, and I think that’s what irks some of us. As example, my friends son struggled in high school and when he got into college, I was overjoyed for him. Same with another friend’s dc who worked his butt off in high school, juggling academics and sports, and was recruited at a D1. Same for a friends son who got into Yale who she worried about socially as a kid. These are otherwise humble families. But in contrast, I know some people who have really taken to SM to brag about vacations, other ‘cool’ things they’re doing, their parties, their husbands love letter to them, their new pricey car, etc and yes, those people irk me. I stopped following them on SM ages ago, but those are the same ones who make announcements in other ways to ensure no one missed their latest brag.
Ok, for real, you are exactly the type of poster I am curious to get an answer from. I'm trying not to judge but I honestly can't understand why so many people have this view, and yet are on social media. Most of social media seems to be about sharing the (mostly good) things in your life. If posts about vacations, parties, new cars, college acceptances etc. all bother you as "narcissistic bragging," then what exactly do you like to see on your social media feed from your friends and acquaintances? Is it only acceptable to share about your struggles, and if you have enough struggles, then it is okay to share good news now and then?
Social media = bragging and stoking other people’s envy.
Are their people out there who still don’t understand that fact?
I missed that memo.
I’m on social media to stay connected to people I like, to appreciate the good stuff (kids, travel, pets, gardens etc.), and to the extent people want to share it, be aware of the hard stuff (illness, divorce, death in the family/friend group etc.) in order to be supportive as appropriate to the person and our connection.
If seeing a particular person’s posts regularly annoys me or triggers some other negative feeling on a repeated basis, I hide them from my feed. Because life is too short for that BS.
Anonymous
12/03/2025 13:49
Subject: Can I be honest? I don’t care much about my friends kids college announcements
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I love seeing them. This is so weird. I have two in college about to graduate and I still love seeing where kids land.
Why? Why do you care? Why do you think it matters at all? Especially if it's not your kid? I'm genuinely curious.
I’m genuinely curious if you actually have good friends? Like you only care about what happens to your kids and no one else’s. It makes me wonder if some of you only have relationships based on what you can get from people. Purely transactional. It makes so much sense based on some of these comments.
Oh please. How many "good friends" do you have who have kids going to college? You might have one or two, sure, and with those friends you don't have to rely on social media or a group text to know where they're "landing." They'll tell you over dinner or a beer.
If you're only learning from social media where the kids are going to college, the parents aren't your "good friends."
Get off your high horse.
I think you can still be happy for people even if they are not close friends. Like “oh cool, good for so and so.” I don’t post anything on social media but I think it’s the whole point…to share and connect with people you might not see everyday? I rather see happy news than 99% of the crap that’s on Facebook or whatever.
Anonymous
12/03/2025 13:45
Subject: Can I be honest? I don’t care much about my friends kids college announcements
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I love seeing them. This is so weird. I have two in college about to graduate and I still love seeing where kids land.
Same! I’m curious & enjoy seeing where people land. My friend network is pretty down to earth though.
I can only deduce two things by the responses -
a. People on DCUM are surrounded by insufferable people and they’re over it. Or,
b. People on DCUM are petty and insecure, and have a difficult time being happy for others.
This pretty much nails it. I can’t understand why OP and others have such a visceral reaction to people sharing good news.
Anonymous
12/03/2025 13:45
Subject: Can I be honest? I don’t care much about my friends kids college announcements
I'm an old auntie and I love it. I especially love connecting people who have schools / programs in common. scholarships, internships, mentors can be obtained that way. Also, I will send $$.
Anonymous
12/03/2025 13:35
Subject: Can I be honest? I don’t care much about my friends kids college announcements
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I love seeing them. This is so weird. I have two in college about to graduate and I still love seeing where kids land.
Why? Why do you care? Why do you think it matters at all? Especially if it's not your kid? I'm genuinely curious.
I’m genuinely curious if you actually have good friends? Like you only care about what happens to your kids and no one else’s. It makes me wonder if some of you only have relationships based on what you can get from people. Purely transactional. It makes so much sense based on some of these comments.
Oh please. How many "good friends" do you have who have kids going to college? You might have one or two, sure, and with those friends you don't have to rely on social media or a group text to know where they're "landing." They'll tell you over dinner or a beer.
If you're only learning from social media where the kids are going to college, the parents aren't your "good friends."
Get off your high horse.
Anonymous
12/03/2025 13:12
Subject: Can I be honest? I don’t care much about my friends kids college announcements
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I love seeing them. This is so weird. I have two in college about to graduate and I still love seeing where kids land.
Why? Why do you care? Why do you think it matters at all? Especially if it's not your kid? I'm genuinely curious.
I’m genuinely curious if you actually have good friends? Like you only care about what happens to your kids and no one else’s. It makes me wonder if some of you only have relationships based on what you can get from people. Purely transactional. It makes so much sense based on some of these comments.
Anonymous
12/03/2025 13:11
Subject: Can I be honest? I don’t care much about my friends kids college announcements
Some of these reactions are so odd and bitter. Love seeing my photos of my friends kids and where they are going. Most of my friends post one photo, usually a baby photo with caption of where they are going to college. It is a big milestone and I think having a post about it is completely fine. It's also exciting for my friends (not just their kids) bc they will presumably be visiting the school and city it is in several times during the next few years. Of course multiple over the top posts would be different.
Anonymous
12/03/2025 13:09
Subject: Can I be honest? I don’t care much about my friends kids college announcements
Anonymous wrote:Nothing amuses me more than some parents’ ineluctable enthusiasm while revealing their kids’ admission to Northeastern or Tulane.
Who cares? You guys just come off as more insecure than the people doing the posting.
Anonymous
12/03/2025 13:07
Subject: Can I be honest? I don’t care much about my friends kids college announcements
I would be so mad if my good friends didn't text me with this news!!
Anonymous
12/03/2025 13:06
Subject: Can I be honest? I don’t care much about my friends kids college announcements
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I love seeing them. This is so weird. I have two in college about to graduate and I still love seeing where kids land.
Why? Why do you care? Why do you think it matters at all? Especially if it's not your kid? I'm genuinely curious.
This is pretty sad. How can the idea of pleasure over your friends achievements be such a foreign concept?
DP.
Here’s the thing. Pleasure is great but you’re being dishonest if you don’t admit that there’s a huge element of narcissistic bragging at play for many parents, and I think that’s what irks some of us. As example, my friends son struggled in high school and when he got into college, I was overjoyed for him. Same with another friend’s dc who worked his butt off in high school, juggling academics and sports, and was recruited at a D1. Same for a friends son who got into Yale who she worried about socially as a kid. These are otherwise humble families. But in contrast, I know some people who have really taken to SM to brag about vacations, other ‘cool’ things they’re doing, their parties, their husbands love letter to them, their new pricey car, etc and yes, those people irk me. I stopped following them on SM ages ago, but those are the same ones who make announcements in other ways to ensure no one missed their latest brag.
Ok, for real, you are exactly the type of poster I am curious to get an answer from. I'm trying not to judge but I honestly can't understand why so many people have this view, and yet are on social media. Most of social media seems to be about sharing the (mostly good) things in your life. If posts about vacations, parties, new cars, college acceptances etc. all bother you as "narcissistic bragging," then what exactly do you like to see on your social media feed from your friends and acquaintances? Is it only acceptable to share about your struggles, and if you have enough struggles, then it is okay to share good news now and then?
Social media = bragging and stoking other people’s envy.
Are their people out there who still don’t understand that fact?
Anonymous
12/03/2025 13:05
Subject: Can I be honest? I don’t care much about my friends kids college announcements
It doesn’t seem like a big deal? Parents who post every little thing are annoying but college is a big deal. Let them be excited and proud!
Anonymous
12/03/2025 12:54
Subject: Can I be honest? I don’t care much about my friends kids college announcements
I remember being happy for my friends and their kids because junior year on is stressful. I don't get the anger, but you do you, OP.
Anonymous
12/03/2025 12:46
Subject: Can I be honest? I don’t care much about my friends kids college announcements
Dang... I must have missed the rule book on this. Thank you, random anonymous person.
Anonymous wrote:Only the kids should be announcing their schools, if they must be announced—not the parents.
Anonymous
12/03/2025 12:42
Subject: Can I be honest? I don’t care much about my friends kids college announcements
Only the kids should be announcing their schools, if they must be announced—not the parents.
Anonymous
12/03/2025 12:34
Subject: Can I be honest? I don’t care much about my friends kids college announcements
Anonymous wrote:No one is jealous (that is not the right world tho) of a teen or their family. "Good for you." But people who don't care for such posts should continue scrolling on or not go on social media to begin with because that's pretty much what's on social media --updates, photos, videos and reactions to those photos updates and videos.
Word