Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:While not in this age group but I recently came in contact with a woman who says that she's 29 and she's never had a boyfriend and she's never had her first kiss yet either

I'm almost 47 and have never had a boyfriend and I've been kissed on the lips twice. Once was sexual harassment* and once was an unfortunate greeting by a senior citizen uncle. *When I reported the kiss to my boss the next day his response was "Why would he do that? I mean, why would he do that to YOU?" I was like wow I guess not only do men not like me but they can't even fathom ANYONE liking me.

A part of me likes to think that cases like this for women are more common than we think as is well the theme of this thread or just the topic of discussion of this thread it's just that women just choose not to disclose their case or situation as much as men do

Anonymous wrote:Maybe some of us don't want to settle for mediocre men who we will have to take care of?

Maybe some of us are perfectly happy buying our own houses, traveling by ourselves and just comfortable ALONE. Why is that so hard to understand?

And yes, I am so GLAD I do not have CHILDREN!

^^^ this post is a good example of how sometimes women (and men) who make it that long without a relationship can be brittle, inflexible, uncharismatic people to be around.

On another note, pretty women may be “single”, but unless it’s because of religion, they are almost always having s*x with someone lurking in the background.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Very pretty" women are almost never single. They must not be pretty.

Untrue. There are many very pretty single women.

They must still be in their 20s.

A "very pretty" woman would be fending off suitors. There are always exceptions, but in 95% of the cases, a really pretty woman would be scooped up real quick.

In the dmv? Where you need a car to get anywhere? Where might these suitors be for a work from home person? At the chicfila? The costco where men keep their gaze to the ceiling and many are with kids? And no dog parks for me after a pit attacked my pup.

Good example of a woman who has social skills problems and might be single for a while.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Very pretty" women are almost never single. They must not be pretty.

This is untrue. A lot of the prettiest women I know are single while some of the dumpiest women are paired up.

Plus 1 !!!

I feel like the women I know in these situations often share these traits:

Very much into spending time with their parents, siblings and friends

Generally independent and into working a lot

Have super high standards for guys or not that interested

Appear to not have high sexual drives

Inflexible and set in their ways

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:While not in this age group but I recently came in contact with a woman who says that she's 29 and she's never had a boyfriend and she's never had her first kiss yet either

I'm almost 47 and have never had a boyfriend and I've been kissed on the lips twice. Once was sexual harassment* and once was an unfortunate greeting by a senior citizen uncle. *When I reported the kiss to my boss the next day his response was "Why would he do that? I mean, why would he do that to YOU?" I was like wow I guess not only do men not like me but they can't even fathom ANYONE liking me.

Are you of a different culture? Do you drive? Curious why you never had a boyfriend

A different culture from what? What does driving have to do with anything? I have a driver's license and know how to drive. I haven't owned a car in almost 20 years.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:While not in this age group but I recently came in contact with a woman who says that she's 29 and she's never had a boyfriend and she's never had her first kiss yet either

I'm almost 47 and have never had a boyfriend and I've been kissed on the lips twice. Once was sexual harassment* and once was an unfortunate greeting by a senior citizen uncle. *When I reported the kiss to my boss the next day his response was "Why would he do that? I mean, why would he do that to YOU?" I was like wow I guess not only do men not like me but they can't even fathom ANYONE liking me.

Are you of a different culture? Do you drive? Curious why you never had a boyfriend

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Very pretty" women are almost never single. They must not be pretty.

This is untrue. A lot of the prettiest women I know are single while some of the dumpiest women are paired up.

I sometimes think this is due to high standards - physical ones. I’m one of those pretty girls and although married now, it took me longer to find a good partner than my friends and many acquaintances. In addition to what other women look for (kind, smart, funny, etc), I also wanted a tall and handsome partner (I’m also tall), and a lot of handsome men can be “players” or full of themselves and lack other key qualities like kindness. This is of course an oversimplification. If I lowered my physical standards, I could have found a great partner earlier and I tried settling in the looks or height department but I just didn’t feel enough attraction to date any long term. Looks fade so it’s a shame when you don’t overlook those things.

Maybe some of us don't want to settle for mediocre men who we will have to take care of?

Maybe some of us are perfectly happy buying our own houses, traveling by ourselves and just comfortable ALONE. Why is that so hard to understand?

And yes, I am so GLAD I do not have CHILDREN!

Anonymous wrote:While not in this age group but I recently came in contact with a woman who says that she's 29 and she's never had a boyfriend and she's never had her first kiss yet either

I'm almost 47 and have never had a boyfriend and I've been kissed on the lips twice. Once was sexual harassment* and once was an unfortunate greeting by a senior citizen uncle. *When I reported the kiss to my boss the next day his response was "Why would he do that? I mean, why would he do that to YOU?" I was like wow I guess not only do men not like me but they can't even fathom ANYONE liking me.

My guess is these people are not sexual. Terrible person to choose for a marriage partner.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Upbringing. A friend is/was very devout. It took her years/decades to understand and accept she would not meet her husband at church. She’s in her first LTR, and we are in are mid-40s.

There are A LOT of Black women in this situation.

this was my problem, too, and I am not black. I met my DH at work, and he's an atheist. I do think religion can make things harder.

Another +1 for religious upbringing. It took me years to get past it never having even kissed until my late 20s. I wanted to get married and have kids and just searching within my group was not working out. I finally met my DH at work and got married at 35.

While not in this age group but I recently came in contact with a woman who says that she's 29 and she's never had a boyfriend and she's never had her first kiss yet either

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well I found a case of a woman in an article from this past February and another unexpected case:
https://www.yourtango.com/heartbreak/40-never-had-boyfriend?fbclid=IwAR3Vv8IZgtjy3BM_AZZ5L_N0mutaiUfym1mxeKLX_HPc2PojrKxVspzSEy4

But yeah there's no denying the fact that men are still normally expected to make the first move and ask the woman out and be the initiators and take the lead all the time.

I know I'm not the only guy in the world that has always hated and resented that gender dynamic

None of my relationships were I was equally vested as a man at courting stage worked. Men quickly loose interest if the woman texts, calls and invites him out at par with himself. She instantly devalues herself and he moves to a “higher” target

Yep you're just like the typical woman or like the majority of women out there who is stubborn and adamant that a woman should never ask a guy out or never be the one to initiate with a man

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

My theory about these women who have avoided relationships entirely is that they paid close attention and opted out.

highly doubt that . But whatever the reasons may be, it's a HUGE red flag. It is often said here for any man 35+ who has never been in a [serious] relationship, the reasoning of why are not important - just the fact.

Yeah it's always a bigger red flag if a man has not been in a relationship by a certain age than it is for a woman