Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Seems like a lot of you are taking this op-Ed personally! He’s not wrong, although I do take issue with the timing and singling out moms - because there have to be a few examples of dads doing this too even if it’s not as frequent. It could’ve been more balanced.

The point is that we are doing our kids a huge disservice by not stepping back and encouraging independence.

The editorial is a strong indicator that Purdue’s administrators are sexist. I would not want to send a smart girl there, based on this.

Lol, ok. Read into it whatever you want. And don’t send your DD there based on an op-Ed written by one person. But does he have a valid point or not? You can agree with the message even if you take issue with the delivery.

One person? The president and former governor of the state, writing in the Washington Post? No one is in a better position to speak for the school?
Just sit back and enjoy.

I am very familiar with who Mitch Daniels is, probably more so than most people on here. I agree the article is tone deaf and unfairly singled out moms. The timing is atrocious. There are much better ways to make the point that parents of college students need to let go. But he’s right in that point. You know he is. That’s why you’re ignoring the message and making sweeping generalizations about the import of this on the university.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This was shared in a post about crazy moms on college parents Facebook page making outlandish requests of the college. The page is highly left leaning and none of the respondents are against the tone of the message at all. They took the context for what it represents. This is a nothing burger and certainly zero bad intentions.

People engaging in a Facebook post about "crazy moms" liked this article? Shocking.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If he were a true academic, he would have written something deeper to ask good questions about how we got to this place, about the role that society seeks of mothers, of why parents can't let go, why college is seen as such a make or break situation, etc. Instead he took a smarmy, look how clever and superior I am approach.

Don't be naive. It's an op-ed that the WaPo chose to run because it would garner a lot of clicks. You don't think that this college president, who was a politician, understands the difference? College presidents are first and foremost rain makers.

He won't be rainmaking for long.

+1. I’m filing this under “f—k around and find out”.

+2. After the smug tone of his editorial, I can’t wait until he loses his job in disgrace. Hopefully it’s a slow news day, so that gets the amount of press coverage he richly deserves.

Oh, I don't think his job will be in danger at all. But I sense a big wake up call that we really need to check out these schools, their admin, and the states they're in, especially for our daughters. Purdue will continue to wonder why it falls behind in the M/F balance and its failure to get women into engineering.

Please click and scroll down to the paragraph, "Where are all the men?" He doesn't want women in engineering. He is quite proud that Purdue has maintained its male majority.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If he were a true academic, he would have written something deeper to ask good questions about how we got to this place, about the role that society seeks of mothers, of why parents can't let go, why college is seen as such a make or break situation, etc. Instead he took a smarmy, look how clever and superior I am approach.

Don't be naive. It's an op-ed that the WaPo chose to run because it would garner a lot of clicks. You don't think that this college president, who was a politician, understands the difference? College presidents are first and foremost rain makers.

He won't be rainmaking for long.

+1. I’m filing this under “f—k around and find out”.

+2. After the smug tone of his editorial, I can’t wait until he loses his job in disgrace. Hopefully it’s a slow news day, so that gets the amount of press coverage he richly deserves.

Oh, I don't think his job will be in danger at all. But I sense a big wake up call that we really need to check out these schools, their admin, and the states they're in, especially for our daughters. Purdue will continue to wonder why it falls behind in the M/F balance and its failure to get women into engineering.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: I know one who turned down an endowed chair which would have offered a higher income in a lower COL area because she got this vibe from there.

-100

Yeah sure you do!

Yes, I do. They have tried to a do a lot of attracting female faculty from other institutions. I don't know how successful they are broadly, but they weren't with her. Her case was about 4 or 5 years ago.

And another -100.

For everyone all upset over Daniels generalizing the minority of moms in his op-Ed, here you go generalizing based on 1 woman you allegedly know. Thanks for making his point.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: I know one who turned down an endowed chair which would have offered a higher income in a lower COL area because she got this vibe from there.

-100

Yeah sure you do!

Yes, I do. They have tried to a do a lot of attracting female faculty from other institutions. I don't know how successful they are broadly, but they weren't with her. Her case was about 4 or 5 years ago.

And another -100.

For everyone all upset over Daniels generalizing the minority of moms in his op-Ed, here you go generalizing based on 1 woman you allegedly know. Thanks for making his point.

Anonymous wrote:This was shared in a post about crazy moms on college parents Facebook page making outlandish requests of the college. The page is highly left leaning and none of the respondents are against the tone of the message at all. They took the context for what it represents. This is a nothing burger and certainly zero bad intentions.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: I know one who turned down an endowed chair which would have offered a higher income in a lower COL area because she got this vibe from there.

-100

Yeah sure you do!

Yes, I do. They have tried to a do a lot of attracting female faculty from other institutions. I don't know how successful they are broadly, but they weren't with her. Her case was about 4 or 5 years ago.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: I know one who turned down an endowed chair which would have offered a higher income in a lower COL area because she got this vibe from there.

-100

Yeah sure you do!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s an important read for many on DCUM — don’t be like the moms he references. Let your college kids figure stuff out on their own!

https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/2022/05/06/mothers-day-helicopter-parenting/

OP, are you a woman? You shoud be ashamed of yourself if you are. We have got to take the country and our lives back from these sexist, mysoginist pigs. What a hateful, horrible

man. If my kid were at Purdue (he's not, he's at a top 10 university, t thankfully), I would not pay another dime of tuition until this man releases a apology. Shameful.

OP here. Yes, I am a woman. Do you think the actual requests and commands that he mentions are appropriate? I hear this type of thing over and over from people who work in colleges and even at workplaces. The infantalizing of our adult children has to stop.

But not a single mention of men. It's mean-spirited at best but more accurately a reflection of the diretion this country is headed. We are no longer moving forward as women. I feel it in my life everyday. Being belittled and looked down on by men. So some moms can't let go. Of course I believe that. But so the hell what? Why do I care? I don't do that. What I do see everyday is my husband leaving every single aspect of parenting to me. Treating me as if I'm the hire help, even as I hold down a full-time, WOH job, and he doesn't. This guy is a sexist and is joining the whilte men chorus in taking women back down. Wake up.

Did you read the op-ed? He does mention men and fathers and says they do not submit anywhere near the number of questions as mothers.

Well, duh, they have their wives doing it for them. Did they stop their wives from doing it? Did they step in and say, "son, your mother shouldn't be doing this for you, time to adult?" No. No, they didn't; but who complains about them for their failure to raise independent competent kids who can find their own roommate? Much easier to blame the mom.

So you are okay with the moms submitting these concerns to a college?

I think for every mom who oversteps, there are 99 making sure the tuition bill is paid on time. He paints the minority as typical, while taking the financial and logistical support of the majority for granted.

+1
I work in higher ed. People love to talk trash about helicopter moms but the reality is that more than 99% don't do this. They just make sure their kids are there, the tuition is paid, their health insurance is figured out etc. I hear though lots of repeating about the handful of 'crazy moms' we have out of our tens of thousands of students.

Thanks for confirming this. That's what makes his "Happy Mother's Day" roast so infuriating. He takes up "tribute to mom" space by repeating his most egregious & entertaining & embellished cocktail party stories over that past 30 years and paints mothers with the stroke of cray cray. What's more, except for the most egregious examples (that we'd all agree cross the line), many of these start as legitimate concerns -- where parents absolutely have every right and should step in to ask about (depression, sickness, mold, safe living conditions, etc). Maybe those moms took it too far or maybe he's just full of shit.

yes

DP. I think the point is that the kids should be handling most of these issues themselves. Why is mom stepping in at all? Do moms have a right to call up a child’s employer to discuss workplace conditions?

It’s one thing if the student has raised serious issues with the school and gets ignored. But for most of the examples given, there’s no reason the mom should be the one leading the charge.

Anonymous wrote: I know one who turned down an endowed chair which would have offered a higher income in a lower COL area because she got this vibe from there.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If he were a true academic, he would have written something deeper to ask good questions about how we got to this place, about the role that society seeks of mothers, of why parents can't let go, why college is seen as such a make or break situation, etc. Instead he took a smarmy, look how clever and superior I am approach.

Don't be naive. It's an op-ed that the WaPo chose to run because it would garner a lot of clicks. You don't think that this college president, who was a politician, understands the difference? College presidents are first and foremost rain makers.

He won't be rainmaking for long.

+1. I’m filing this under “f—k around and find out”.

+2. After the smug tone of his editorial, I can’t wait until he loses his job in disgrace. Hopefully it’s a slow news day, so that gets the amount of press coverage he richly deserves.

With a stacked deck, this former Bush II appointee will be around for awhile:

Daniels was selected by the Trustees of the Board of Purdue University, all of whom he appointed or re-appointed while Governor,[8] to become the university president after his term as governor ended on January 14, 2013. (Wikipedia)

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If he were a true academic, he would have written something deeper to ask good questions about how we got to this place, about the role that society seeks of mothers, of why parents can't let go, why college is seen as such a make or break situation, etc. Instead he took a smarmy, look how clever and superior I am approach.

Don't be naive. It's an op-ed that the WaPo chose to run because it would garner a lot of clicks. You don't think that this college president, who was a politician, understands the difference? College presidents are first and foremost rain makers.

He won't be rainmaking for long.

+1. I’m filing this under “f—k around and find out”.

+2. After the smug tone of his editorial, I can’t wait until he loses his job in disgrace. Hopefully it’s a slow news day, so that gets the amount of press coverage he richly deserves.