Anonymous
03/19/2026 11:48
Subject: Best private schools in NYC?
They also have a lot of complaints about the girls themselves and the other parents. Weird and off-putting would be the G-Rated version of what they have to say. They are not happy, and at this point have been unhappy for long enough that they are seeking exit. The place seems like a bit of a mess these days.
Anonymous
03/19/2026 11:44
Subject: Best private schools in NYC?
Brearley's academics are all over the map these days. It did a total revamp of its entire curriculum after 2020 and has a completely different set of objectives and priors than it used to. Unclear what this means as far as student outcomes, etc. People I know who were there before 2020 have a lot of complaints about the shift in direction.
Anonymous
03/17/2026 15:48
Subject: Best private schools in NYC?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Yep, humility and self-awareness are also under-appreciated traits. Any parent who starts a sentence with “my extremely bright kid” can probably improve on both counts.
This was to forestall any 'sour grapes' type accusations, but she would never describe herself that way.
And I haven't met any of these kids, all I know is that my daughter doesn't want to go to school with them. I'm sharing that in case anybody finds that a useful data point. If your kid goes to Brearley and you're affronted that my kid has a bad impression of the school then sorry but you're not the intended audience here.
When we did tours many private schools were upfront that if you went public for elementary the child can end up tanking their admission later on. The formative years is where you have an opportunity to guide your child and select an environment you feel will be best for them.
Your child opinion can say more about your child’s comfort level than it does about others.
I was just laughing w my own kid who just got an internship she wanted that the most valuable line in her cover letter was probably about attending title 1 grade school and private high school - re ability to thrive in a wide variety of environments.
she did local schools k-8 (which were kinda mediocre but great peers), TT high school, and T5 college.
Anonymous
03/17/2026 10:17
Subject: Best private schools in NYC?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I love that you guys’ answer to “Brearley girls are weird and off-putting” is not “no they’re not” but rather “ha look at this loser thinking their kid is smart.”
That’s because one person’s really bright kid saying they felt brearley girls were weird after taking a couple afternoon classes with them proves exactly nothing about brearley girls and it’s a bit silly to think otherwise.
OK but the end result is that the original claim went un-challenged until long past the point where somebody stumbling on it would also see a rebuttal.
NP - I found the original claim to be generic and not adding much value. The person afterwards was divisive and received the attention of others.
Anonymous
03/17/2026 09:46
Subject: Best private schools in NYC?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I love that you guys’ answer to “Brearley girls are weird and off-putting” is not “no they’re not” but rather “ha look at this loser thinking their kid is smart.”
That’s because one person’s really bright kid saying they felt brearley girls were weird after taking a couple afternoon classes with them proves exactly nothing about brearley girls and it’s a bit silly to think otherwise.
OK but the end result is that the original claim went un-challenged until long past the point where somebody stumbling on it would also see a rebuttal.
Anonymous
03/17/2026 09:25
Subject: Best private schools in NYC?
Anonymous wrote:I love that you guys’ answer to “Brearley girls are weird and off-putting” is not “no they’re not” but rather “ha look at this loser thinking their kid is smart.”
That’s because one person’s really bright kid saying they felt brearley girls were weird after taking a couple afternoon classes with them proves exactly nothing about brearley girls and it’s a bit silly to think otherwise.
Anonymous
03/17/2026 09:15
Subject: Best private schools in NYC?
I love that you guys’ answer to “Brearley girls are weird and off-putting” is not “no they’re not” but rather “ha look at this loser thinking their kid is smart.”
Anonymous
03/17/2026 08:47
Subject: Best private schools in NYC?
Anonymous wrote:Yep, humility and self-awareness are also under-appreciated traits. Any parent who starts a sentence with “my extremely bright kid” can probably improve on both counts.
ngl, this made me chuckle.
Anonymous
03/16/2026 17:03
Subject: Best private schools in NYC?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Yep, humility and self-awareness are also under-appreciated traits. Any parent who starts a sentence with “my extremely bright kid” can probably improve on both counts.
This was to forestall any 'sour grapes' type accusations, but she would never describe herself that way.
And I haven't met any of these kids, all I know is that my daughter doesn't want to go to school with them. I'm sharing that in case anybody finds that a useful data point. If your kid goes to Brearley and you're affronted that my kid has a bad impression of the school then sorry but you're not the intended audience here.
When we did tours many private schools were upfront that if you went public for elementary the child can end up tanking their admission later on. The formative years is where you have an opportunity to guide your child and select an environment you feel will be best for them.
Your child opinion can say more about your child’s comfort level than it does about others.
You have had a deep swig of that private school kool aid. Red or Purple?
Hugs and kisses,
A parent whose kids have done both private and public
Anonymous
03/16/2026 12:48
Subject: Best private schools in NYC?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Yep, humility and self-awareness are also under-appreciated traits. Any parent who starts a sentence with “my extremely bright kid” can probably improve on both counts.
This was to forestall any 'sour grapes' type accusations, but she would never describe herself that way.
And I haven't met any of these kids, all I know is that my daughter doesn't want to go to school with them. I'm sharing that in case anybody finds that a useful data point. If your kid goes to Brearley and you're affronted that my kid has a bad impression of the school then sorry but you're not the intended audience here.
When we did tours many private schools were upfront that if you went public for elementary the child can end up tanking their admission later on. The formative years is where you have an opportunity to guide your child and select an environment you feel will be best for them.
Your child opinion can say more about your child’s comfort level than it does about others.
Most of the private schools take in a significant number of DCs from public and other private schools in 9th grade. You aren't "tanking" anything by not signing on in kindergarten, and doing so also will not guarantee that your chosen school will continue to be the best fit for your child through 12th grade.
Anonymous
03/16/2026 12:45
Subject: Best private schools in NYC?
Anonymous wrote:Yep, humility and self-awareness are also under-appreciated traits. Any parent who starts a sentence with “my extremely bright kid” can probably improve on both counts.
Lol, this. Very ironic.
Anonymous
03/16/2026 12:35
Subject: Re:Best private schools in NYC?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Yep, humility and self-awareness are also under-appreciated traits. Any parent who starts a sentence with “my extremely bright kid” can probably improve on both counts.
This was to forestall any 'sour grapes' type accusations, but she would never describe herself that way.
And I haven't met any of these kids, all I know is that my daughter doesn't want to go to school with them. I'm sharing that in case anybody finds that a useful data point. If your kid goes to Brearley and you're affronted that my kid has a bad impression of the school then sorry but you're not the intended audience here.
When we did tours many private schools were upfront that if you went public for elementary the child can end up tanking their admission later on. The formative years is where you have an opportunity to guide your child and select an environment you feel will be best for them.
Your child opinion can say more about your child’s comfort level than it does about others.
Private schools admit lots of ringers from public schools for 9th grade, so this sounds like somebody who was trying to sell you on the idea of a $70k/year kindergarten you don't need.
And this wasn't a comment about the school environment, it was about the kids. Not that it matters, but she got into a different TT SS school for middle but chose to go to a public middle instead; she has subsequently gotten to know girls from those schools better and feels confident in that decision, and is particularly scathing about Brearley.
Anonymous
03/16/2026 11:56
Subject: Best private schools in NYC?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Yep, humility and self-awareness are also under-appreciated traits. Any parent who starts a sentence with “my extremely bright kid” can probably improve on both counts.
This was to forestall any 'sour grapes' type accusations, but she would never describe herself that way.
And I haven't met any of these kids, all I know is that my daughter doesn't want to go to school with them. I'm sharing that in case anybody finds that a useful data point. If your kid goes to Brearley and you're affronted that my kid has a bad impression of the school then sorry but you're not the intended audience here.
When we did tours many private schools were upfront that if you went public for elementary the child can end up tanking their admission later on. The formative years is where you have an opportunity to guide your child and select an environment you feel will be best for them.
Your child opinion can say more about your child’s comfort level than it does about others.
Anonymous
03/16/2026 11:28
Subject: Best private schools in NYC?
Anonymous wrote:Still… I do not think drawing conclusions about a school based on hearsay is particularly helpful.
I mean that's fair but it's not like we have a whole lot of other things to go on here - college matriculation numbers are equally unhelpful since it's impossible to separate the school from the family in terms of its impact on those.
As a more general point I can say that she has learned a *lot* about private schools - both good and bad - from going to after-school classes with private school kids, and that if you have a middle schooler starting to think about high school who's socially outgoing enough to strike up conversations about school with kids they don't know, it might be worth your time to try to find a few classes / camps / etc that attract lots of private school kids.
Anonymous
03/16/2026 11:24
Subject: Re:Best private schools in NYC?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It seems that a lot of folks don’t know or understand Allen-Stevenson. For k-8 it is an exceptional school that offers a great balance between academics, fantastic extracurriculars and an outstanding music program. As someone with kids in multiple private schools, it is literally the best school for boys that want or excel at multiple activities, bar none.
We had admissions in Bernard’s and collegiate and picked AS and would pick it again over those two. My Son excelled in academics, got time to play intramural sports at varsity middle school
(and AS wins most except wrestling where Buckley rules), played a musical instrument, played in an orchestra and and was a
student government leader. AS produces multiple boys like that who immediately excel when they join 7-9th at any TT high school.
Even my son’s exmissions led to pick of choices (all hills schools) and dalton. The TT k-12 schools at high school level have very well defined environments for a certain type of children and they are pretty upfront about it. So kindergarten parents as your kids grow, make your the school is the right fit for them. If your son wants to excel in multiple activities and then find a school like Allen Stevenson, St Davids or Riverdale that supports that.
AS wins most athletics? I watched them lose a soccer game 7-0 this fall and a basketball game at home by a large margin. The other boys schools seemed much sportier. Maybe I just saw a couple bad games?
I think it’s pretty widely known that NYC private schools are laughably horrible at sports. Sometimes they produce stellar athletes, many of whom compete outside the school teams. But, broadly speaking, they are horrible. Anecdote: my best friend growing up was an excellent lacrosse player. When we were starting high school - we were at trin - she decided she wanted to pursue it for college. Through her mom, she was able to meet the dartmouth girls lacrosse coach, who straight up told her to transfer if she wanted to get recruited. My friend didn’t want to go away to school, so she stayed freshman year, but we were so bad that she finally said, screw it, and transferred to choate.
Generally true though there are plenty of exceptions. I know of kids in recent years who have gone to various Ivies for baseball and basketball (including at least one from Trinity). Plenty go D3. Harrison Bader (major league baseball player) went to Horace Mann.
Like you mentioned, there are also quite a few who have gone to boarding school or elsewhere if they really thought they had a future.
My HM senior is a top 10 SLAC sports recruit. We didn’t get tons of support in that part of the process from HM, but there are athletes there that go on to play varsity sports in college. I don’t think DS’s prospects would have been different at any other high school.