Anonymous wrote:

We don't know for sure what was said but no idea why OP would lie about it.

We only know what the OP says she said to him. He's not lying about what she said, but that doesn't mean that she wasn't lying to him about what she said.

Anonymous wrote:

So when I am talking to a guy at my kids school and he asks if i would mind a playdate (this has happenend many times), I should assume he wants to sleep with me and decline?
Before you all ask, YES i have had playdates with a MAN and his child and GASP.................nothing romantic happened. One was even a single dad and spent the entire time talking about home renovations.

I've been on playdates with women and their kids and GASP we did not get jiggy in the playground mulch with the kids watching but GASP we did meet at a hotel on different days before picking the kids up.

Of course, I've been on plenty of other playdates with women where nothing happened at any time.

What's really funny was the time when my kid and her kid didn't actually like each other much but the mom kept suggesting playdates 'cause she liked me and my son was like "why are you making me play with that kid again?"

I've been in every one of these situations:
- I'm not attracted to the mom, so we talk about banal house and kid stuff during the playdate
- I'm attracted to the mom but not getting any signals she's attracted to me, so again we talk about house and kid stuff
- I'm attracted to the mom and she's signaling interest, so I crank up the witty banter
- I'm not attracted to the mom and she's signaling interest and I'm trying to figure out how to eject from this playdate as fast as I can

We don't know for sure what was said but no idea why OP would lie about it.

So when I am talking to a guy at my kids school and he asks if i would mind a playdate (this has happenend many times), I should assume he wants to sleep with me and decline?
Before you all ask, YES i have had playdates with a MAN and his child and GASP.................nothing romantic happened. One was even a single dad and spent the entire time talking about home renovations.

Anonymous wrote:I would let it go, but if she went out with him again...you know something is up.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The people defending the girlfriend's behavior are laughable. Why couldn't the girlfriend just say the following from the very beginning on the phone "look I'm in a relationship so this won't work, but you could join a larger social gathering that's happening at xyz location and I can introduce you to some friends." There is really no excuse for her to go through all of that effort to meet with him. She already has limited time as a divorced mom anyway. Are people really going on "no dates" all the time with people so the guy doesn't get angry? Give me a break. She was either interested or is a flirt who likes the attention. Trust me, people who are really in love with each other or dating seriously don't play these types of games. They simply wouldn't put themselves in a situation that would make the other person uncomfortable. She is just not the one. Be glad you figured this one out now because I'm sure there would have been other boundary testing behaviors in the future.

OMG clearly you are not a woman. This is a situation that happens all the time.

Guy says, hey, I need some advice about xyz, would you be willing to talk to me about it?
Woman: sure, but I'm in a relationship.
Guy: WTF is wrong with you, I'm not asking you out, why do you think you're so hot? Proceeds to badmouth woman all over the office (playground) as being so ridiculously full of herself to assume everyone is asking her out.

so maybe the guy IS asking her out, but if he's not going to be completely honest, he's setting her up where she can't be completely upfront either without being made to look like a fool.

I'm sorry you don't know how to deal with aggressive men. There's no good reason she had to go out with him no matter how you try to spin it.

Unless she WANTS a friend. And thinks he could be one.
I am friends with guys who initially wanted to date me, but you know what? We are fine as friends. they have married other women. It is called being an adult and not a sleeze.

You don’t seem to understand that the not a date guy here is definitely a sleeze. I’m a guy and see this a million miles away. So she’s seeking out a friendship with a sleeze. Is that ok?

Nice. so YOUR ability to judge someone you never met is better than a WOMANS ability to judge someone they HAVE met?
Is that right?
She felt that it was ok to go talk with him but brought a friend. She felt ok enough to actually meet with the guy but make it clear it would be nothing more. She did nothing wrong except make her controlling BF upset here.

No we have OPs word that there was interest there from the man making him a sleeze. OP is interested too and y’all are making up elaborate justifications. I know women like this and they are all deceitful, conniving and sneaky. DTMF ASAP

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The people defending the girlfriend's behavior are laughable. Why couldn't the girlfriend just say the following from the very beginning on the phone "look I'm in a relationship so this won't work, but you could join a larger social gathering that's happening at xyz location and I can introduce you to some friends." There is really no excuse for her to go through all of that effort to meet with him. She already has limited time as a divorced mom anyway. Are people really going on "no dates" all the time with people so the guy doesn't get angry? Give me a break. She was either interested or is a flirt who likes the attention. Trust me, people who are really in love with each other or dating seriously don't play these types of games. They simply wouldn't put themselves in a situation that would make the other person uncomfortable. She is just not the one. Be glad you figured this one out now because I'm sure there would have been other boundary testing behaviors in the future.

OMG clearly you are not a woman. This is a situation that happens all the time.

Guy says, hey, I need some advice about xyz, would you be willing to talk to me about it?
Woman: sure, but I'm in a relationship.
Guy: WTF is wrong with you, I'm not asking you out, why do you think you're so hot? Proceeds to badmouth woman all over the office (playground) as being so ridiculously full of herself to assume everyone is asking her out.

so maybe the guy IS asking her out, but if he's not going to be completely honest, he's setting her up where she can't be completely upfront either without being made to look like a fool.

I'm sorry you don't know how to deal with aggressive men. There's no good reason she had to go out with him no matter how you try to spin it.

Unless she WANTS a friend. And thinks he could be one.
I am friends with guys who initially wanted to date me, but you know what? We are fine as friends. they have married other women. It is called being an adult and not a sleeze.

You don’t seem to understand that the not a date guy here is definitely a sleeze. I’m a guy and see this a million miles away. So she’s seeking out a friendship with a sleeze. Is that ok?

Nice. so YOUR ability to judge someone you never met is better than a WOMANS ability to judge someone they HAVE met?
Is that right?
She felt that it was ok to go talk with him but brought a friend. She felt ok enough to actually meet with the guy but make it clear it would be nothing more. She did nothing wrong except make her controlling BF upset here.

Anonymous wrote:

She took steps to make it a NON DATE even if the guy wanted it to be more. She made it clear it is not.

The GF seems to have been aware of this possibility, too--guys do this ALL THE TIME, so most woman know this move--and took very reasonable steps to make clear to him that she is taken and not interested in romance with him.

We only have her word to OP for any of this, and what else was she going to say to the OP? Who knows how the supposed non-date actually played out.

I myself have been on supposed "non dates" where the women could have told their boyfriends or husbands completely honestly afterward that "nothing happened we just had drinks and chatted" but oh darn somehow we later ended up in the sack. I knew we were meeting so she could evaluate me. All I had to do was not screw it up. Obviously I passed the test.

"I'm not interested in you and I have a boyfriend but yes I'll go to dinner with you" has never happened to me, and frankly I don't find it very plausible.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The people defending the girlfriend's behavior are laughable. Why couldn't the girlfriend just say the following from the very beginning on the phone "look I'm in a relationship so this won't work, but you could join a larger social gathering that's happening at xyz location and I can introduce you to some friends." There is really no excuse for her to go through all of that effort to meet with him. She already has limited time as a divorced mom anyway. Are people really going on "no dates" all the time with people so the guy doesn't get angry? Give me a break. She was either interested or is a flirt who likes the attention. Trust me, people who are really in love with each other or dating seriously don't play these types of games. They simply wouldn't put themselves in a situation that would make the other person uncomfortable. She is just not the one. Be glad you figured this one out now because I'm sure there would have been other boundary testing behaviors in the future.

OMG clearly you are not a woman. This is a situation that happens all the time.

Guy says, hey, I need some advice about xyz, would you be willing to talk to me about it?
Woman: sure, but I'm in a relationship.
Guy: WTF is wrong with you, I'm not asking you out, why do you think you're so hot? Proceeds to badmouth woman all over the office (playground) as being so ridiculously full of herself to assume everyone is asking her out.

so maybe the guy IS asking her out, but if he's not going to be completely honest, he's setting her up where she can't be completely upfront either without being made to look like a fool.

I'm sorry you don't know how to deal with aggressive men. There's no good reason she had to go out with him no matter how you try to spin it.

Unless she WANTS a friend. And thinks he could be one.
I am friends with guys who initially wanted to date me, but you know what? We are fine as friends. they have married other women. It is called being an adult and not a sleeze.

You don’t seem to understand that the not a date guy here is definitely a sleeze. I’m a guy and see this a million miles away. So she’s seeking out a friendship with a sleeze. Is that ok?

She took steps to make it a NON DATE even if the guy wanted it to be more. She made it clear it is not.

The GF seems to have been aware of this possibility, too--guys do this ALL THE TIME, so most woman know this move--and took very reasonable steps to make clear to him that she is taken and not interested in romance with him.