Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When women wonder why they face discrimination, I point to this. It's women doing it to each other. You want to fire a woman just because she is more attractive than you. Cray cray.

Who needs the patriarchy

Patriarchy has always required the support and assistance of women to succeed. We have people blaming the wife, the friend, the nanny, too many are reluctant to hold the husband accountable. We've got people bragging about how the fire or don't hire attractive women at their jobs. The real kicker is I bet most of these posters consider themselves feminist and were out protesting in pink hats against Trump and freaking out about their rights when RGB died. Fwminism and confronting misogyny happens in real-time, in the smaller moments of our lives, folks

Agree with all of this, except there is nothing the man did that was wrong. He merely commented that his nanny was hot to a friend. Not to the nanny. He didn't create a hostile work environment. This whole scenario is just women tearing each other down for their looks

He should have kept it to himself or just his wife because now it's been spread around the community creating a very awkward situation for the nanny. Self-control is a hallmark of adulthood, as adults, we know we don't have to verbalize every thought that crosses our mind. Raise your standards for men.

+1

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When women wonder why they face discrimination, I point to this. It's women doing it to each other. You want to fire a woman just because she is more attractive than you. Cray cray.

Who needs the patriarchy

Patriarchy has always required the support and assistance of women to succeed. We have people blaming the wife, the friend, the nanny, too many are reluctant to hold the husband accountable. We've got people bragging about how the fire or don't hire attractive women at their jobs. The real kicker is I bet most of these posters consider themselves feminist and were out protesting in pink hats against Trump and freaking out about their rights when RGB died. Fwminism and confronting misogyny happens in real-time, in the smaller moments of our lives, folks

Agree with all of this, except there is nothing the man did that was wrong. He merely commented that his nanny was hot to a friend. Not to the nanny. He didn't create a hostile work environment. This whole scenario is just women tearing each other down for their looks

If he did make that comment, why was it necessary to say that to his friend? They can’t have a bonding moment without talking about the hotness of employees that work in their home? I do agree that the DH is the one that should be accountable for what he says and I disagree that it is too much to expect that he use common sense. You shouldn’t never tell someone that you think someone else’s baby is ugly, don’t talk about how your nanny/manny is hot and, never ask a women how far along she is if she hasn’t said that she is pregnant.

Anonymous wrote:None of the above examples apply. The dad hasn't said or done anything to cause the nanny to be uncomfortable. And if you were a hot nanny, I promise you the dad fantasized about you all the time. It's just human nature.

Not all men are creeps turned on by the barely legal.

Anonymous wrote:I’d be careful. The recent story of Christopher Plummer’s death reminds me men go for younger women. Captain von Trapp ditches the Baroness who is wealthy, stylish and sophisticated for Maria who is just kind of annoying.

You would love this, then: https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/i-regret-to-inform-you-that-my-wedding-to-captain-von-trapp-has-been-canceled

None of the above examples apply. The dad hasn't said or done anything to cause the nanny to be uncomfortable. And if you were a hot nanny, I promise you the dad fantasized about you all the time. It's just human nature.

Anonymous wrote:I was a "hot nanny" and now I'm kind of seeing why I've only ever worked for "alpha women". The first woman I worked for was divorced, was pretty hot herself, and put in 12 hour days working in finance. The second family I worked for had a mom who was a VP of a company you've heard of and her husband was a SAHD/artist.

I don't think it'd work out if I had to work for a pervy dad who brags to his friends about me and an insecure woman. That's just trouble.

I was a pretty hot nanny too and I only worked for one family for a couple of years. Both parents were very successful but they were both very family focused and crazy about each other. I came from a broken family so it was a pleasure to live with this family. I was so lucky to never feel I was being leered at by some horny older guy. I’m still in touch with them over 20 years later and I really see them as role models for the life I now have.

I was a "hot nanny" and now I'm kind of seeing why I've only ever worked for "alpha women". The first woman I worked for was divorced, was pretty hot herself, and put in 12 hour days working in finance. The second family I worked for had a mom who was a VP of a company you've heard of and her husband was a SAHD/artist.

I don't think it'd work out if I had to work for a pervy dad who brags to his friends about me and an insecure woman. That's just trouble.

When I was 39 and DH was 40 we had a 22 year old nanny for three years who was very hot but she was such a good nanny that her hotness was never a concern. I wasn’t too shabby myself and I’ve never had insecurities about my relationship with my husband. Some of my GF’s were “surprised” I had hired such a pretty nanny but her looks were never a consideration. I’m sure my husband thought she was hot but he was almost old enough to be her father and she could better than that! He was also smart enough to keep his mouth shut! We hated to see her go back to school. Our next nanny was the opposite of hot and a poor nanny so she only lasted a month.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the responses here would be different if the topic were "A doctor at work called a nurse hot" or "Our CEO called me hot". It's weird the way people treat nannies.

You're an employer. Act like one.

Because he didn’t “treat” her poorly. He made a comment to his friend. Have you ever made a comment about a co-worker ever to anyone outside of work? This is NBD

He made a comment that got back to her place of work and based on the "get a new nanny" comments may have a detrimental effect on her employment. So no, I've never said anything about an employee that caused them potential harm. I also don't make comments about employees to people who will tell my coworker's friend what was said.

It's really not hard to act professionally. Even when your employee is in your home you still owe a level of professionalism.

+1 It really isn't. I mean we expet our kids not to say everything that pops into their head. Come on people, think it, don't say it!

I don't even know what OP's problem is. Sounds like a control freak.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the responses here would be different if the topic were "A doctor at work called a nurse hot" or "Our CEO called me hot". It's weird the way people treat nannies.

You're an employer. Act like one.

Because he didn’t “treat” her poorly. He made a comment to his friend. Have you ever made a comment about a co-worker ever to anyone outside of work? This is NBD

He made a comment that got back to her place of work and based on the "get a new nanny" comments may have a detrimental effect on her employment. So no, I've never said anything about an employee that caused them potential harm. I also don't make comments about employees to people who will tell my coworker's friend what was said.

It's really not hard to act professionally. Even when your employee is in your home you still owe a level of professionalism.

Anonymous wrote:I think the responses here would be different if the topic were "A doctor at work called a nurse hot" or "Our CEO called me hot". It's weird the way people treat nannies.

You're an employer. Act like one.

Because he didn’t “treat” her poorly. He made a comment to his friend. Have you ever made a comment about a co-worker ever to anyone outside of work? This is NBD

I’m not gonna lie, I would get a new nanny.

I think the responses here would be different if the topic were "A doctor at work called a nurse hot" or "Our CEO called me hot". It's weird the way people treat nannies.

You're an employer. Act like one.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There’s a great bit in one of Ali Wong’s Netflix specials on why she hired an old nanny. It’s damn funny...and practical advice! Don’t hire a hot nanny.

That didn't work for Maria Shriver.

Exactly what I was thinking.

When I was a kid, a handsome married man in our community had an affair with a funny looking (but friendly) married woman. I commented to my father that the pairing shocked me. His response: "She probably has skills of which you are unaware."

I didn't understand his comment at the time.