Anonymous
04/01/2020 06:08
Subject: So overwhelmed by parenting + working FT from home
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I’m so sick of people saying this can all be fixed with a schedule. I can’t do a schedule because I’m working!!! Today I have calls/zooms from 12 noon to 3 pm and then another at 4:30. Tomorrow they start at 9:30 am and go to 11:30 am then back again at 2:30 pm. I am supposed to have my calendar available to my clients. There is no routine because I’m trying to fit my kids around my and my DH’s (crazier) work schedule.
I agree about the schedules, but it also sounds like your and your husband's employers are being unreasonable. We have days like that, too, but we've also really pushed back on expectations.
Why should an employer change routine conference calls and deadlines just because of parents with kids? All the other individuals get really pissed about that because they don't feel that they should have to accommodate our children. DH and I are unhappy, we try to have the kids on a schedule, but when we both have a call at the same time, we rely on screen time. We're doing what we can to manage.
We do the same thing, but you also can’t possibly be serious. Why should an employer change because of a catastrophic, once in a generation situation? Because it’s a catastrophic, once in a generation situation. People who can be flexible should be flexible to accommodate those with less flexibility. I don’t give a damn if people with flexibility get annoyed because... they have flexibility? We live in a society and we need to accommodate each other, *including* children. JFC.
Anonymous
03/31/2020 21:01
Subject: So overwhelmed by parenting + working FT from home
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:This was going around Facebook a couple days ago. I have to say I agree and it is unsustainable. I was *already* part time and am finding it unmanageable with a 9yo (w severe ADHD) and a 6 yo. I am requesting at least a few weeks off starting next week, and consider myself VERY lucky that it's an option and shouldn't totally bomb my career.
--
CHILDCARE IS WORK. PEOPLE SPECIALIZE IN IT!
TEACHING IS WORK. PEOPLE SPECIALIZE IN IT!
THEY ARE BOTH FULL TIME JOBS IN THEIR OWN RIGHT.
EXPECTING PARENTS TO WORK FULL TIME AT FULL PRODUCTIVITY RIGHT NOW IS ASKING THEM TO WORK TWO FULL TIME JOBS (SIMULTANEOUSLY!!) OR NEGLECT THEIR CHILDREN.
IT IS ASKING THEM TO DO THIS WHILE THEY ARE UNDER THE SAME SOCIETAL STRESSORS AS EVERYONE ELSE - NAMELY HEIGHTENED ANXIETY, SCHEDULE DISRUPTION, AND STRUCTURAL DISRUPTION.
IT IS UNREASONABLE CAPITALIST VIOLENCE TO HOLD THE SAME EXPECTATIONS THAT WE DID BEFORE FOR PARENTS WHO WORK RIGHT NOW AND WE SHOULD NOT TOLERATE IT.
IT ALSO DEVALUES THE WORK OF TEACHERS AND CAREGIVERS AND UPHOLDS DAMAGING SOCIETAL MYTHS THAT THIS LABOR IS NOT WORK, AND WE SHOULD NOT TOLERATE THAT EITHER.
NO I WILL NOT STOP SHOUTING.
This is great.
Yup. Oh, and stay healthy while doing it.
Anonymous
03/31/2020 19:50
Subject: So overwhelmed by parenting + working FT from home
Seeing several of the last posts including the note on Facebook makes me feel better in that I know I'm not alone in the struggle. However I don't wish this on anyone.
Anonymous
03/31/2020 19:01
Subject: Re:So overwhelmed by parenting + working FT from home
Regarding the kids--who is sick of all the activities being dreamed up for kids? I am flooded with emails right now about how to keep my kids occupied. This is in addition to school emails--I am getting multiple email regarding my PRE-schooler's Zoom schedule and then there's my school age kid who has learning disabilities. We are lucky in that his school has done a great job transitioning to distance learning but he now has his own Zoom schedule and a parent has to be with him the entire time to help. I SAH but DH is working from home full-time and is not very available to help with both kids. I've basically ditched all the preschooler stuff (but the school is acting like it's important) in favor of the school aged kid's activities. Hello? We are not bored! We are super busy. I have no idea how families with two WAH parents are managing the school Zooms.