My friends and I all drink 1 drink a week, usually a glass fo wine or beer on friday night. The reality about FAS is that its caused by large amounts of alcohol, not responsible drinking. The problem is its very well documented that 1-2 drinks usually leads to 3-4 and ppl always understate how much they have.

My best friend for 20+ years is now an OBGYN who specializes in maternal fetal medicine (I am lucky in my pregnancy that I have her). She says bc of the issues described above doctors feel like the ONLY safe thing to recommend is zero. Small amounts of alcohol have not been proven to negatively affect the baby; practically they have been proven to be safe but no one will frame it that way.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP HERE looks like some people missed my update so hopefully that gets their attention. I found out I was pregnant at 3w6d and have drank no more than 5-6 times since then. I am in my second trimester. When I drank it was 7oz of wine MAX. Sometimes just 3 oz. One time it was a beer. DH recently started antidepressants. He knows he needs to be very careful about drinking now that he's taking them. Thanks for the concern though. I have other relaxation strategies, drinking was one of the not so healthy ones.

OP you stated that you self-medicate with alcohol for anxiety and that you husband is on antidepressants...are you ready to be parents? I don't ask think to be mean or judgmental but it seems like things that you would want to both work on prior to conceiving or at least spend the 9 months trying to better but if you're continuing to drink as a relaxation strategy (your words) and your husband wants a drinking buddy even while on antidepressants (your words) then you really need to consider the life you are creating for your child. Best of luck.

This. Parenting is hard work, and environmental stress is severely damaging to early childhood development. Physician Gabor Mate has the research. He has some good talks on YouTube. Peace.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I drank pretty often before pregnancy. I get very emotional/stressed while pregnant, way more than usual. I only have 1-1.5 servings of alcohol at a time on a full stomach, not often, but I feel guilty still. I don't tell anyone but my husband. He encourages it because I am pretty high strung and misses having someone to drink with. Negative comments go ahead, I'll ignore. Looking for others who are doing the same.

I know someone with fetal alcohol syndrome and it is heartbreaking. He is grown and had an IQ of 70 and is now in prison for drugs and burgularly. Is this what you want for your child? You are a selfish person

Alcohol during pregnancy can have severe consequences.
Is it worth the gamble?

No.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look up Fetal Alcohol Syndrome and wrap your feeble mind around the fact that this is what you're doing to your child.

Wrap your feeble mind around this: Pre 70s, most moms smoked and drank throughout their pregnancies. As in martinis and gin and tonics. And yet, there wasn't a huge drop in kids with special needs. In fact, there's a small rise in the overall rate because of ASD.

Correlation does not equal causation. There are many other differences between the 70s and today... medicines (before and during pregnancy), birth control pills, pollution, food quality in general, etc... Also the diagnosis of ASD is much better known today than it was and parents are more aware.

And where were all the FAS kids when I was growing up? Not a one in my parents hard drinking crowd of 5 to 8 kids each.

The idea that today's moms have that drinking is this immediate birth defect sentence has never been proven.

And how do you know that? I mean did you do medical examinations on those kids? It’s just like ADHD- not a single kid “had” it when I was growing up and now it’s much more diagnosed given what we know now. Same with FAS.

There are probably a lot of undiagnosed FAS cases walking around- probably all of the adults addicted to heroin now had parents who were drinkers during pregnancy. It doesn’t take much either- just a few sips here or there is enough to condemn your kid for life.

Wow. In that case I hope you’re not planning on having any pain medication for your labor because that *mught* affect your kid too....

Anonymous wrote:I drank pretty often before pregnancy. I get very emotional/stressed while pregnant, way more than usual. I only have 1-1.5 servings of alcohol at a time on a full stomach, not often, but I feel guilty still. I don't tell anyone but my husband. He encourages it because I am pretty high strung and misses having someone to drink with. Negative comments go ahead, I'll ignore. Looking for others who are doing the same.

I know someone with fetal alcohol syndrome and it is heartbreaking. He is grown and had an IQ of 70 and is now in prison for drugs and burgularly. Is this what you want for your child? You are a selfish person

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP HERE looks like some people missed my update so hopefully that gets their attention. I found out I was pregnant at 3w6d and have drank no more than 5-6 times since then. I am in my second trimester. When I drank it was 7oz of wine MAX. Sometimes just 3 oz. One time it was a beer. DH recently started antidepressants. He knows he needs to be very careful about drinking now that he's taking them. Thanks for the concern though. I have other relaxation strategies, drinking was one of the not so healthy ones.

OP you stated that you self-medicate with alcohol for anxiety and that you husband is on antidepressants...are you ready to be parents? I don't ask think to be mean or judgmental but it seems like things that you would want to both work on prior to conceiving or at least spend the 9 months trying to better but if you're continuing to drink as a relaxation strategy (your words) and your husband wants a drinking buddy even while on antidepressants (your words) then you really need to consider the life you are creating for your child. Best of luck.

Good questions here....

Bumping inflammatory threads from months ago for no reason? Why does starting fights with strangers on the internet bring you joy?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP HERE looks like some people missed my update so hopefully that gets their attention. I found out I was pregnant at 3w6d and have drank no more than 5-6 times since then. I am in my second trimester. When I drank it was 7oz of wine MAX. Sometimes just 3 oz. One time it was a beer. DH recently started antidepressants. He knows he needs to be very careful about drinking now that he's taking them. Thanks for the concern though. I have other relaxation strategies, drinking was one of the not so healthy ones.

OP you stated that you self-medicate with alcohol for anxiety and that you husband is on antidepressants...are you ready to be parents? I don't ask think to be mean or judgmental but it seems like things that you would want to both work on prior to conceiving or at least spend the 9 months trying to better but if you're continuing to drink as a relaxation strategy (your words) and your husband wants a drinking buddy even while on antidepressants (your words) then you really need to consider the life you are creating for your child. Best of luck.

Good questions here....

Anonymous wrote: There are probably a lot of undiagnosed FAS cases walking around- probably all of the adults addicted to heroin now had parents who were drinkers during pregnancy. It doesn’t take much either- just a few sips here or there is enough to condemn your kid for life.

On what basis do you make the connection between heroin deaths and FAS? Heroin deaths increased sharply after 2010. Are you trying to say that women who got pregnant after say 1985-1990 (e.g. mothers of 20-25 year olds in 2010) drank alcohol a lot more than mothers in past years? That's funny, because fetal alcohol syndrome was first discovered only about a decade before that, in 1973, and it was only 1988 that it became required to put warnings on alcoholic drinks about drinking in pregnancy. Before that, doctors actually gave alcohol to some pregnant women to delay preterm labor. Nobody knew that alcohol could be harmful. So I'd venture to guess that during the time that people dying of heroin overdoses in recent years were conceived, their mothers were actually much less likely to drink alcohol during pregnancy than mothers who conceived just a few years before. Granted, correlation does not equal causation, but if you're going to try to say that heroin addicts ALL have FAS, I think it's fair to ask for some basis in data or science to back that up, because just looking at overall trends, it doesn't make any sense.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look up Fetal Alcohol Syndrome and wrap your feeble mind around the fact that this is what you're doing to your child.

Wrap your feeble mind around this: Pre 70s, most moms smoked and drank throughout their pregnancies. As in martinis and gin and tonics. And yet, there wasn't a huge drop in kids with special needs. In fact, there's a small rise in the overall rate because of ASD.

Correlation does not equal causation. There are many other differences between the 70s and today... medicines (before and during pregnancy), birth control pills, pollution, food quality in general, etc... Also the diagnosis of ASD is much better known today than it was and parents are more aware.

And where were all the FAS kids when I was growing up? Not a one in my parents hard drinking crowd of 5 to 8 kids each.

The idea that today's moms have that drinking is this immediate birth defect sentence has never been proven.

And how do you know that? I mean did you do medical examinations on those kids? It’s just like ADHD- not a single kid “had” it when I was growing up and now it’s much more diagnosed given what we know now. Same with FAS.

There are probably a lot of undiagnosed FAS cases walking around- probably all of the adults addicted to heroin now had parents who were drinkers during pregnancy. It doesn’t take much either- just a few sips here or there is enough to condemn your kid for life.

This is such sanctimonious unfounded bullshit. Plenty of tests have shown that "a few sips here or there" has ZERO correlation with physical or behavioral problems. If anything, most tests show light drinkers have smarter kids, but that's probably because they're smart enough not to buy into this Puritanical non scientific ruse in the first place.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look up Fetal Alcohol Syndrome and wrap your feeble mind around the fact that this is what you're doing to your child.

Wrap your feeble mind around this: Pre 70s, most moms smoked and drank throughout their pregnancies. As in martinis and gin and tonics. And yet, there wasn't a huge drop in kids with special needs. In fact, there's a small rise in the overall rate because of ASD.

Correlation does not equal causation. There are many other differences between the 70s and today... medicines (before and during pregnancy), birth control pills, pollution, food quality in general, etc... Also the diagnosis of ASD is much better known today than it was and parents are more aware.

And where were all the FAS kids when I was growing up? Not a one in my parents hard drinking crowd of 5 to 8 kids each.

The idea that today's moms have that drinking is this immediate birth defect sentence has never been proven.

And how do you know that? I mean did you do medical examinations on those kids? It’s just like ADHD- not a single kid “had” it when I was growing up and now it’s much more diagnosed given what we know now. Same with FAS.

There are probably a lot of undiagnosed FAS cases walking around- probably all of the adults addicted to heroin now had parents who were drinkers during pregnancy. It doesn’t take much either- just a few sips here or there is enough to condemn your kid for life.

Anonymous wrote:OP HERE looks like some people missed my update so hopefully that gets their attention. I found out I was pregnant at 3w6d and have drank no more than 5-6 times since then. I am in my second trimester. When I drank it was 7oz of wine MAX. Sometimes just 3 oz. One time it was a beer. DH recently started antidepressants. He knows he needs to be very careful about drinking now that he's taking them. Thanks for the concern though. I have other relaxation strategies, drinking was one of the not so healthy ones.

OP you stated that you self-medicate with alcohol for anxiety and that you husband is on antidepressants...are you ready to be parents? I don't ask think to be mean or judgmental but it seems like things that you would want to both work on prior to conceiving or at least spend the 9 months trying to better but if you're continuing to drink as a relaxation strategy (your words) and your husband wants a drinking buddy even while on antidepressants (your words) then you really need to consider the life you are creating for your child. Best of luck.