Anonymous wrote:OP I think you just need to live a little. You have 15k in net income/month and 9k in fixed costs; so presumably you have 6k leftover for cars, utilities, food, and a lot of savings. And you say drive Hondas so you don't have huge car payments - if any.

So I imagine you are saving no less than 2-4k/month. You really can't forego saving for 1.5 months, gather up 5k and take a vacation someplace nice? You don't have to do it 5 times a yr, but your outlook on life may be different and you may feel less deprived if you do this once every 12-18 months.

Obviously if OP saves all her disposable income, she is going to feel like she has no luxuries. This is one of the dumbest threads I have read on here. OP, live a little. You come home by 3, picked one of the lowest paid medical specialties. Your DH left big law for a lower paid fed job. At minimum, he should be able to flex his schedule.

OP I think you just need to live a little. You have 15k in net income/month and 9k in fixed costs; so presumably you have 6k leftover for cars, utilities, food, and a lot of savings. And you say drive Hondas so you don't have huge car payments - if any.

So I imagine you are saving no less than 2-4k/month. You really can't forego saving for 1.5 months, gather up 5k and take a vacation someplace nice? You don't have to do it 5 times a yr, but your outlook on life may be different and you may feel less deprived if you do this once every 12-18 months.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How old are you, OP?

You should live a little. Go on a few vacations. No sympathy here. Sorry.

When we were 30, we had a HHI of about 300. We now have a $1 million and we are late 30's. We traveled when earned 300k.

OP here. We both are 35. Hhi will not go up much. I am a public health doc and my husband is a lawyer-quit biglaw as a senior associate because our lives were terrible. Now he has gov job and we get to see each other (and enjoy it). Our incomes may increase another 50k or so but that is it.

I know how you feel OP. With all that education, training, and hard work, it does feel like you should be earning more and/or living a more luxurious lifestyle. We have a HHI of 600k and a much lower mortgage (2800), and though we don't have a hard life, by any means, it's certainly not luxurious. We enjoy small luxuries here and there like a yearly vacation (around 10k), a couple of designer clothes items a year, and multiple activities for the kids, but we don't do private school, no nanny/household help, aside from biweekly cleaning lady, and we don't feel like we can afford a 3rd kid, although we'd like to have a 3rd. As a PP had mentioned before though, that's how life is and we never assumed that we would be rich. Our HHI today probably affords us the same lifestyle that 150k did 20 years ago, which puts us solidly in middle/maybe upper middle class. It feels like we're on a hamster wheel though, because we will probably never catch up to the rich, who, mostly through luck, are set for life in terms of wealth, and continue to grow their wealth and political power.

You're a ridiculous human being if you think $600k puts you solidly middle class. It's objectively wealthy.

PP who makes $600K and feels like she is UMC-- please start your own thread! What are you spending your money on that you feel like you are on a hamster wheel??

Plus, $10K on one vacation?!

OP- you made choices that allow you to have a great lifestyle (house, home by 3pm, lots of family time, etc). For most folks, you don't get to have BOTH great quality of life/family time AND $$$$$ to go on pricey vacations, luxury cars, etc. For example, you could have been a specialist with on call hours, and make a lot more $$; your husband could have stayed in big law. You made choices that give you better quality of life, but you traded the big money for that.

Anonymous wrote:K. Now I'm thinking op is messing with us. Explain how 3750 is a monthly payment on a mortgage less than $417k (jumbo). Maybe a 15 year? And she put down 25%, making total value of the house not more than about $550k. Where in north arlington can you get a house for $550k, unless it was years ago. In which case she's almost done paying off that 15 yr mortgage.

Jumbo in dc area was 625 a few years ago.

Anonymous wrote:DH and I have one toddler and live in N. Arlington. Our HHi is a bit over 300K, far more than we had ever thought we would make. We save, pay student loans, and childcare. We have a nice house but it is not anything spectacular (4 bedrooms on a small lot). We are not struggling but we also do not toss around a ton of cash like our friends and neighbors, who we know earn less than we do. They always do insane vacations, huge house renovations, etc.

Not sure if we are being to conservative or what. But it sure feels like 300k is peanuts.

There you have it.

You don't know what poor feels like. Do you have to wonder where the next meal will come from? Pay half a bill so you can buy a few days worth of food? Or DON'T pay a bill, again, so you can buy food?

What you're feeling is jealous of those who have more than you do.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How old are you, OP?

You should live a little. Go on a few vacations. No sympathy here. Sorry.

When we were 30, we had a HHI of about 300. We now have a $1 million and we are late 30's. We traveled when earned 300k.

OP here. We both are 35. Hhi will not go up much. I am a public health doc and my husband is a lawyer-quit biglaw as a senior associate because our lives were terrible. Now he has gov job and we get to see each other (and enjoy it). Our incomes may increase another 50k or so but that is it.

I know how you feel OP. With all that education, training, and hard work, it does feel like you should be earning more and/or living a more luxurious lifestyle. We have a HHI of 600k and a much lower mortgage (2800), and though we don't have a hard life, by any means, it's certainly not luxurious. We enjoy small luxuries here and there like a yearly vacation (around 10k), a couple of designer clothes items a year, and multiple activities for the kids, but we don't do private school, no nanny/household help, aside from biweekly cleaning lady, and we don't feel like we can afford a 3rd kid, although we'd like to have a 3rd. As a PP had mentioned before though, that's how life is and we never assumed that we would be rich. Our HHI today probably affords us the same lifestyle that 150k did 20 years ago, which puts us solidly in middle/maybe upper middle class. It feels like we're on a hamster wheel though, because we will probably never catch up to the rich, who, mostly through luck, are set for life in terms of wealth, and continue to grow their wealth and political power.

Oh dear God.

FYI, $150,000 in 1996 Dollars = $237,000 in 2016 Dollars.

http://www.dollartimes.com/inflation/inflation.php?amount=600000&year=1995

You and OP make me sick. Do you have any idea how fortunate you are? Any at all?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How old are you, OP?

You should live a little. Go on a few vacations. No sympathy here. Sorry.

When we were 30, we had a HHI of about 300. We now have a $1 million and we are late 30's. We traveled when earned 300k.

OP here. We both are 35. Hhi will not go up much. I am a public health doc and my husband is a lawyer-quit biglaw as a senior associate because our lives were terrible. Now he has gov job and we get to see each other (and enjoy it). Our incomes may increase another 50k or so but that is it.

I know how you feel OP. With all that education, training, and hard work, it does feel like you should be earning more and/or living a more luxurious lifestyle. We have a HHI of 600k and a much lower mortgage (2800), and though we don't have a hard life, by any means, it's certainly not luxurious. We enjoy small luxuries here and there like a yearly vacation (around 10k), a couple of designer clothes items a year, and multiple activities for the kids, but we don't do private school, no nanny/household help, aside from biweekly cleaning lady, and we don't feel like we can afford a 3rd kid, although we'd like to have a 3rd. As a PP had mentioned before though, that's how life is and we never assumed that we would be rich. Our HHI today probably affords us the same lifestyle that 150k did 20 years ago, which puts us solidly in middle/maybe upper middle class. It feels like we're on a hamster wheel though, because we will probably never catch up to the rich, who, mostly through luck, are set for life in terms of wealth, and continue to grow their wealth and political power.

You're a ridiculous human being if you think $600k puts you solidly middle class. It's objectively wealthy.

This thread..... lmao. And 600K still being called middle class? Hahahahah!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How old are you, OP?

You should live a little. Go on a few vacations. No sympathy here. Sorry.

When we were 30, we had a HHI of about 300. We now have a $1 million and we are late 30's. We traveled when earned 300k.

OP here. We both are 35. Hhi will not go up much. I am a public health doc and my husband is a lawyer-quit biglaw as a senior associate because our lives were terrible. Now he has gov job and we get to see each other (and enjoy it). Our incomes may increase another 50k or so but that is it.

I know how you feel OP. With all that education, training, and hard work, it does feel like you should be earning more and/or living a more luxurious lifestyle. We have a HHI of 600k and a much lower mortgage (2800), and though we don't have a hard life, by any means, it's certainly not luxurious. We enjoy small luxuries here and there like a yearly vacation (around 10k), a couple of designer clothes items a year, and multiple activities for the kids, but we don't do private school, no nanny/household help, aside from biweekly cleaning lady, and we don't feel like we can afford a 3rd kid, although we'd like to have a 3rd. As a PP had mentioned before though, that's how life is and we never assumed that we would be rich. Our HHI today probably affords us the same lifestyle that 150k did 20 years ago, which puts us solidly in middle/maybe upper middle class. It feels like we're on a hamster wheel though, because we will probably never catch up to the rich, who, mostly through luck, are set for life in terms of wealth, and continue to grow their wealth and political power.

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Many good comments (and a few nasty assumptions). To be clear, we are not in debt and we more than manage to break even each year. We save and, in addition to our 401ks, have about 150k in mutual funds and savings. Would like to get that to about 200k. We also put about $500/month into a college savings account for our two year old (neither of us had parents who saved for our education, hence the student loans). We usually go to the Delaware beach for a few days in the summer but that is the extent of our vacations.

As for our home, I wish that it was a lower mortgage. We had saved for about 12 years before buying so we could put down 25% (and stay under jumbo loan territory).

And for the person who said we work all the time-that isn't exactly true. The problem is that DH and I have very early work schedules due to the unique nature of our jobs. We have to be out the door by 6 am, before daycares open (and before our kid is awake). On the plus side, we are home by 3 pm and have five hours of uninterrupted family time, which is amazing.

1. You have a mortgage and student loans. These are debts.

2. Those are robust savings.

3. With that HHI, expenses and savings, you could take decent vacations if you wanted to.

4. Your DH's work schedule is a choice, not a constraint. If you changed that, you could get rid of the nanny.

I have zero sympathy for you, OP. You are in the catbird's seat.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How old are you, OP?

You should live a little. Go on a few vacations. No sympathy here. Sorry.

When we were 30, we had a HHI of about 300. We now have a $1 million and we are late 30's. We traveled when earned 300k.

OP here. We both are 35. Hhi will not go up much. I am a public health doc and my husband is a lawyer-quit biglaw as a senior associate because our lives were terrible. Now he has gov job and we get to see each other (and enjoy it). Our incomes may increase another 50k or so but that is it.

Cry me a river.

Seriously?

Anonymous wrote:How old are you, OP?

You should live a little. Go on a few vacations. No sympathy here. Sorry.

When we were 30, we had a HHI of about 300. We now have a $1 million and we are late 30's. We traveled when earned 300k.

+1

When we were 30, our HHI was about $100K combined. We traveled and took vacations, including vacations abroad.

Anonymous wrote:Plus husband works for the government (presumably Feds) do I do not see any reason why he could not change his work schedule to do morning routine and daycare dropoff. They would save a ton that way, though they would lose the "everyone home by 3" thing.

OP, sounds like you have a great life and should go on vacation once in a while.

OP has a lot of excuses. She should just own her decisions. Feds should be able to easily do daycare drop off. Both parents don't need to be home by 3. All other Feds we know flex their schedules to cover childcare gaps.

Plus husband works for the government (presumably Feds) do I do not see any reason why he could not change his work schedule to do morning routine and daycare dropoff. They would save a ton that way, though they would lose the "everyone home by 3" thing.

OP, sounds like you have a great life and should go on vacation once in a while.