No child should be allowed to terrorize other children. Why does any parent tolerate that??

Anonymous wrote:I feel like I shouldn’t have to shell out 12k a semester for my kid to get a descent education. We live in a nice school district. We pay taxes.

Why is my 8-year-old coming home everyday telling me what the same kid did today in their class?

I truly feel for this kid. Maybe he has a mental illness. Maybe he has a bad home life? But now my kid is anxious to go to school because of this kids outburst and behaviors.

This year alone he’s;

- threatened to kill several peers
- flipped his desk almost weekly
- grabbed a stapler and threatened another kid with it
- had daily loud, disruptive and scary meltdowns
- threatened to kill the teacher
- refused to participate in any class activity
- drew a sexually graphic picture on paperwork

Numerous other classmates and the classroom parent have confirmed these issues.

He’s sent to the office and then comes back. Nothing is done. How is this ok???

Outrageous. Start voting R school board if you seriously want change.

I didn't read the thread, but I'm sure plenty of people have pointed out by now that it's not teachers, but administrators who allow this. Teachers would love to get these kids out of the classroom.

I agree with the long PP that the poster complaining that we’re not spending more billions “accommodating” her kid just sounds like a bad parent who would be far better off taking responsibility and actually raising her kid properly rather than complaining that we’re not spending even more money on them.

Most special needs kids are not violent and don’t cause learning disruptions for the other kids. We need to change the laws to get the bad ones out of the classrooms and let the others actually learn.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is a child who will, in later years, likely have interactions with the carceral system, whereas your child will be privileged. As equity is our most important value, the privileged need to face more struggle, and the future oppressed need to be able to have more enjoyment in their lives.

NP and a teacher. I recognize this is a troll post, but you're right about one thing. The kids who are acting out like this are likely to end up incarcerated, especially if they're not taught that inappropriate behavior has negative consequences. In most cases it's a parenting issue and the lax discipline policies in schools are doing them no favors. There are also kids with attentive parents who have serious mental health issues and need a lot more support than a public school system can provide.

Thank you for being honest that worthless parenting is a big contributor to this problem. It is.

I agree strongly with the teacher. It’s a parenting problem. The problematic children aren’t special needs.They’re hyper, unfocused and don’t get enough parent attention. Focus is a learned skill, so is not talking out of turn.

Part of the problem also is that schools can’t discipline or remove kids, and of course their parents don’t either.

All of them? How do you know? My kid had multiple head injuries, plus preexisting special needs. You’d have no idea if your child was in class with him. No professional who’s heard our story has anything negative to say about my patenting, but believe me, they walk in the door wondering. Are there many kids whose behavior stems from parenting problems? Possible. But not ALL. That’s so insulting. Look up Phineas Gage if you think my child’s misbehavior was my fault.

You’re arguing to assume zebras not horses when you hear galloping animals. It’s just absurd. Every kid who is misbehaving is not Phineas Gage. Do you care about the well-behaved, determined students in nightmare rooms because of poorly behaving kids? Are each of them as special as yours, or does the fact that you’ve spent a lot of time interacting with ‘professionals’ plural reenacting the Good Will Hunting ‘it’s not your fault’ scene sum you up?

Come on. Get over yourself.

+1 I'm so tired of hearing that we either want kids like this to be warehoused or kicked out. No...we just think that OUR kids have just as much right to an education and safety as the disruptive kids. So if their behavior is disruptive, their parents need to take responsiblitiiy and figure it out. No one should have to sit in a classroom like we've seen described here. Our kids are special too. One child causing damage to 24 other kids, and no one thinks that makes no sense? Selfish selfish selfish.

Except the rest of your post says you want them kicked out.

If you actually wanted to address the problem, you'd be advocating for additional resources in public schools to provide for a combination of supports and services in general
education classrooms and self-contained special programs.

But you obviously don't want to have to pay for that. So instead you want to expel them
from public schools. You're not going to win that battle.

You're to have to decide if you're more interested in pushing for changes that would make things better for all students or (futilely) continuing to push for policies that would make things worse for kids with special needs.

DP. You keep threatening that we’re not going to “win” against you so shouldn’t bother trying. I really don’t know why you keep saying that. I think people have had enough. We have finite resources and we already pay FAR more per student than any other country for education. You’re not going to “win” getting much more money out of us. (At least you correctly acknowledge that in many ways this is a battle and it’s you versus the rest of us.) At some point the burden has to go back on parents - if they want “more” (expensive) for their child than a “special school” (that you seem to call warehouse) then they need to find a way to fit the bill for that themselves. Just like if there were any other problem with their child. Taxpayers can provide a BASIC level of support but your child is ultimately your problem to handle, not mine. I’m sorry. My kids have issues too that are expensive to handle in the way we prefer to handle them, but we don’t expect taxpayers to foot the bill for it. Is it utopia? No. But it’s the real world.

But you're wrong about that. We do expect public institutions to accomodate people wirh disabilities even when those accomodations have significant costs. This isn't even unique to schools.

So assuming you agree there's problem that should be solved, ignoring the need to special education services is unproductive. If instead you just to complain and don't actually want to see (and pay for) change, then stick on your current track.

Where in the hell do you get off telling parents of children who can handle gen ed without ever engaging in fits or outbursts or violence that they are the problem because they’re not on the steps of Congress advocating for you to get more of a spend for your kid? You’re a complete POS. You haunt these boards like it’s your job, your writing errors and style are distinctive. Your energy could have been put into getting whatever dream placement you feel entitled to - the sense of entitlement is yours, not that of parents who don’t want their child in a classroom with a violent kid. Instead you hang out here all the MFing time, pretending your hands are tied. I’m sure you’re sooooo busy right supermama?! Right.

It’s ableist as hell to insist as you do that the violence or poor behaviors are because of failure to accommodate a disability, by the way. It’s not comorbid with spectrum disorders to engage in violence or cruelty - you’re the one blending that. My DC is very close with 2 kids in speech therapy, with someone else with dyslexia, with different students with dyscalculia. All different children. None are violent. None use opportune moments like transitions or gym class or recess to attack or bully or freak — the kids who engage in those behaviors may not actually have IEPs or learning disabilities and certainly have no visible physical limitations, and I write this as a parent to a child who was in EI for gross motor delays, and for whom we paid for years of PT when they did not deem our kid qualified for OT or services at school. It was on us to make it work and we did.

You are the ultimate dark joke of bad parenting. You pretend to be high-minded when you’re just lazy and cheap. You are truly representative of a parent who has given up, who thinks everyone else has it so damned easy, and that your child is a curse with ODD and anger and zero empathy, that you just tried so, so, so hard and nothing worked - when you retreated in the face of a challenge and utterly failed to parent, give boundaries, and ever put yourself in someone else’s shoes. You’re the parent that sees the negative impact of their child on literally dozens of others year in and year out in a classroom, and do nothing about it. The other parents get to try and refi their lives to afford a private or homeschool. You are an absolute pig in sh!t on this board. Maybe try a new shtick.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is a child who will, in later years, likely have interactions with the carceral system, whereas your child will be privileged. As equity is our most important value, the privileged need to face more struggle, and the future oppressed need to be able to have more enjoyment in their lives.

NP and a teacher. I recognize this is a troll post, but you're right about one thing. The kids who are acting out like this are likely to end up incarcerated, especially if they're not taught that inappropriate behavior has negative consequences. In most cases it's a parenting issue and the lax discipline policies in schools are doing them no favors. There are also kids with attentive parents who have serious mental health issues and need a lot more support than a public school system can provide.

Thank you for being honest that worthless parenting is a big contributor to this problem. It is.

I agree strongly with the teacher. It’s a parenting problem. The problematic children aren’t special needs.They’re hyper, unfocused and don’t get enough parent attention. Focus is a learned skill, so is not talking out of turn.

Part of the problem also is that schools can’t discipline or remove kids, and of course their parents don’t either.

All of them? How do you know? My kid had multiple head injuries, plus preexisting special needs. You’d have no idea if your child was in class with him. No professional who’s heard our story has anything negative to say about my patenting, but believe me, they walk in the door wondering. Are there many kids whose behavior stems from parenting problems? Possible. But not ALL. That’s so insulting. Look up Phineas Gage if you think my child’s misbehavior was my fault.

You’re arguing to assume zebras not horses when you hear galloping animals. It’s just absurd. Every kid who is misbehaving is not Phineas Gage. Do you care about the well-behaved, determined students in nightmare rooms because of poorly behaving kids? Are each of them as special as yours, or does the fact that you’ve spent a lot of time interacting with ‘professionals’ plural reenacting the Good Will Hunting ‘it’s not your fault’ scene sum you up?

Come on. Get over yourself.

+1 I'm so tired of hearing that we either want kids like this to be warehoused or kicked out. No...we just think that OUR kids have just as much right to an education and safety as the disruptive kids. So if their behavior is disruptive, their parents need to take responsiblitiiy and figure it out. No one should have to sit in a classroom like we've seen described here. Our kids are special too. One child causing damage to 24 other kids, and no one thinks that makes no sense? Selfish selfish selfish.

Except the rest of your post says you want them kicked out.

If you actually wanted to address the problem, you'd be advocating for additional resources in public schools to provide for a combination of supports and services in general
education classrooms and self-contained special programs.

But you obviously don't want to have to pay for that. So instead you want to expel them
from public schools. You're not going to win that battle.

You're to have to decide if you're more interested in pushing for changes that would make things better for all students or (futilely) continuing to push for policies that would make things worse for kids with special needs.

DP. You keep threatening that we’re not going to “win” against you so shouldn’t bother trying. I really don’t know why you keep saying that. I think people have had enough. We have finite resources and we already pay FAR more per student than any other country for education. You’re not going to “win” getting much more money out of us. (At least you correctly acknowledge that in many ways this is a battle and it’s you versus the rest of us.) At some point the burden has to go back on parents - if they want “more” (expensive) for their child than a “special school” (that you seem to call warehouse) then they need to find a way to fit the bill for that themselves. Just like if there were any other problem with their child. Taxpayers can provide a BASIC level of support but your child is ultimately your problem to handle, not mine. I’m sorry. My kids have issues too that are expensive to handle in the way we prefer to handle them, but we don’t expect taxpayers to foot the bill for it. Is it utopia? No. But it’s the real world.

But you're wrong about that. We do expect public institutions to accomodate people wirh disabilities even when those accomodations have significant costs. This isn't even unique to schools.

So assuming you agree there's problem that should be solved, ignoring the need to special education services is unproductive. If instead you just to complain and don't actually want to see (and pay for) change, then stick on your current track.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is a child who will, in later years, likely have interactions with the carceral system, whereas your child will be privileged. As equity is our most important value, the privileged need to face more struggle, and the future oppressed need to be able to have more enjoyment in their lives.

NP and a teacher. I recognize this is a troll post, but you're right about one thing. The kids who are acting out like this are likely to end up incarcerated, especially if they're not taught that inappropriate behavior has negative consequences. In most cases it's a parenting issue and the lax discipline policies in schools are doing them no favors. There are also kids with attentive parents who have serious mental health issues and need a lot more support than a public school system can provide.

Thank you for being honest that worthless parenting is a big contributor to this problem. It is.

I agree strongly with the teacher. It’s a parenting problem. The problematic children aren’t special needs.They’re hyper, unfocused and don’t get enough parent attention. Focus is a learned skill, so is not talking out of turn.

Part of the problem also is that schools can’t discipline or remove kids, and of course their parents don’t either.

All of them? How do you know? My kid had multiple head injuries, plus preexisting special needs. You’d have no idea if your child was in class with him. No professional who’s heard our story has anything negative to say about my patenting, but believe me, they walk in the door wondering. Are there many kids whose behavior stems from parenting problems? Possible. But not ALL. That’s so insulting. Look up Phineas Gage if you think my child’s misbehavior was my fault.

You’re arguing to assume zebras not horses when you hear galloping animals. It’s just absurd. Every kid who is misbehaving is not Phineas Gage. Do you care about the well-behaved, determined students in nightmare rooms because of poorly behaving kids? Are each of them as special as yours, or does the fact that you’ve spent a lot of time interacting with ‘professionals’ plural reenacting the Good Will Hunting ‘it’s not your fault’ scene sum you up?

Come on. Get over yourself.

+1 I'm so tired of hearing that we either want kids like this to be warehoused or kicked out. No...we just think that OUR kids have just as much right to an education and safety as the disruptive kids. So if their behavior is disruptive, their parents need to take responsiblitiiy and figure it out. No one should have to sit in a classroom like we've seen described here. Our kids are special too. One child causing damage to 24 other kids, and no one thinks that makes no sense? Selfish selfish selfish.

Except the rest of your post says you want them kicked out.

If you actually wanted to address the problem, you'd be advocating for additional resources in public schools to provide for a combination of supports and services in general
education classrooms and self-contained special programs.

But you obviously don't want to have to pay for that. So instead you want to expel them
from public schools. You're not going to win that battle.

You're to have to decide if you're more interested in pushing for changes that would make things better for all students or (futilely) continuing to push for policies that would make things worse for kids with special needs.

DP. You keep threatening that we’re not going to “win” against you so shouldn’t bother trying. I really don’t know why you keep saying that. I think people have had enough. We have finite resources and we already pay FAR more per student than any other country for education. You’re not going to “win” getting much more money out of us. (At least you correctly acknowledge that in many ways this is a battle and it’s you versus the rest of us.) At some point the burden has to go back on parents - if they want “more” (expensive) for their child than a “special school” (that you seem to call warehouse) then they need to find a way to fit the bill for that themselves. Just like if there were any other problem with their child. Taxpayers can provide a BASIC level of support but your child is ultimately your problem to handle, not mine. I’m sorry. My kids have issues too that are expensive to handle in the way we prefer to handle them, but we don’t expect taxpayers to foot the bill for it. Is it utopia? No. But it’s the real world.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is a child who will, in later years, likely have interactions with the carceral system, whereas your child will be privileged. As equity is our most important value, the privileged need to face more struggle, and the future oppressed need to be able to have more enjoyment in their lives.

NP and a teacher. I recognize this is a troll post, but you're right about one thing. The kids who are acting out like this are likely to end up incarcerated, especially if they're not taught that inappropriate behavior has negative consequences. In most cases it's a parenting issue and the lax discipline policies in schools are doing them no favors. There are also kids with attentive parents who have serious mental health issues and need a lot more support than a public school system can provide.

Thank you for being honest that worthless parenting is a big contributor to this problem. It is.

I agree strongly with the teacher. It’s a parenting problem. The problematic children aren’t special needs.They’re hyper, unfocused and don’t get enough parent attention. Focus is a learned skill, so is not talking out of turn.

Part of the problem also is that schools can’t discipline or remove kids, and of course their parents don’t either.

All of them? How do you know? My kid had multiple head injuries, plus preexisting special needs. You’d have no idea if your child was in class with him. No professional who’s heard our story has anything negative to say about my patenting, but believe me, they walk in the door wondering. Are there many kids whose behavior stems from parenting problems? Possible. But not ALL. That’s so insulting. Look up Phineas Gage if you think my child’s misbehavior was my fault.

You’re arguing to assume zebras not horses when you hear galloping animals. It’s just absurd. Every kid who is misbehaving is not Phineas Gage. Do you care about the well-behaved, determined students in nightmare rooms because of poorly behaving kids? Are each of them as special as yours, or does the fact that you’ve spent a lot of time interacting with ‘professionals’ plural reenacting the Good Will Hunting ‘it’s not your fault’ scene sum you up?

Come on. Get over yourself.

+1 I'm so tired of hearing that we either want kids like this to be warehoused or kicked out. No...we just think that OUR kids have just as much right to an education and safety as the disruptive kids. So if their behavior is disruptive, their parents need to take responsiblitiiy and figure it out. No one should have to sit in a classroom like we've seen described here. Our kids are special too. One child causing damage to 24 other kids, and no one thinks that makes no sense? Selfish selfish selfish.

Except the rest of your post says you want them kicked out.

If you actually wanted to address the problem, you'd be advocating for additional resources in public schools to provide for a combination of supports and services in general
education classrooms and self-contained special programs.

But you obviously don't want to have to pay for that. So instead you want to expel them
from public schools. You're not going to win that battle.

You're to have to decide if you're more interested in pushing for changes that would make things better for all students or (futilely) continuing to push for policies that would make things worse for kids with special needs.

Anonymous wrote:What’s a disgrace is that ALL students don’t have a legal right to FAPE. That law needs to change.

Agreed.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is a child who will, in later years, likely have interactions with the carceral system, whereas your child will be privileged. As equity is our most important value, the privileged need to face more struggle, and the future oppressed need to be able to have more enjoyment in their lives.

NP and a teacher. I recognize this is a troll post, but you're right about one thing. The kids who are acting out like this are likely to end up incarcerated, especially if they're not taught that inappropriate behavior has negative consequences. In most cases it's a parenting issue and the lax discipline policies in schools are doing them no favors. There are also kids with attentive parents who have serious mental health issues and need a lot more support than a public school system can provide.

Thank you for being honest that worthless parenting is a big contributor to this problem. It is.

I agree strongly with the teacher. It’s a parenting problem. The problematic children aren’t special needs.They’re hyper, unfocused and don’t get enough parent attention. Focus is a learned skill, so is not talking out of turn.

Part of the problem also is that schools can’t discipline or remove kids, and of course their parents don’t either.

All of them? How do you know? My kid had multiple head injuries, plus preexisting special needs. You’d have no idea if your child was in class with him. No professional who’s heard our story has anything negative to say about my patenting, but believe me, they walk in the door wondering. Are there many kids whose behavior stems from parenting problems? Possible. But not ALL. That’s so insulting. Look up Phineas Gage if you think my child’s misbehavior was my fault.

You’re arguing to assume zebras not horses when you hear galloping animals. It’s just absurd. Every kid who is misbehaving is not Phineas Gage. Do you care about the well-behaved, determined students in nightmare rooms because of poorly behaving kids? Are each of them as special as yours, or does the fact that you’ve spent a lot of time interacting with ‘professionals’ plural reenacting the Good Will Hunting ‘it’s not your fault’ scene sum you up?

Come on. Get over yourself.

+1 I'm so tired of hearing that we either want kids like this to be warehoused or kicked out. No...we just think that OUR kids have just as much right to an education and safety as the disruptive kids. So if their behavior is disruptive, their parents need to take responsiblitiiy and figure it out. No one should have to sit in a classroom like we've seen described here. Our kids are special too. One child causing damage to 24 other kids, and no one thinks that makes no sense? Selfish selfish selfish.

It's not just special ed kids. There's so much inertia, entitlement and disrespect from all kids and their parents, and the administrations in each school are utterly useless. This despite having counselors, behavior specialists, etc.

There are plenty of kids who make an effort, plenty of lovely well-mannered parents, but it literally just takes 1 kid (usually there's a lot more, but for the sake of argument, let's say 1)to turn a class upside down.

And...the phones have got to go.

Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand why the powerful teachers union(s) don’t do more to support teachers. They should have their contracts include class size and protection from unsafe students.

They aren’t that powerful. If they were, teachers wouldn’t be working in such crappy conditions. My building is full of mold, mice, insects, non-potable water, heat/air conditioning that doesn’t work, etc.

Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand why the powerful teachers union(s) don’t do more to support teachers. They should have their contracts include class size and protection from unsafe students.

Union contracts can't override state and federal laws that protect students' rights to an education.

I don’t understand why the powerful teachers union(s) don’t do more to support teachers. They should have their contracts include class size and protection from unsafe students.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is a child who will, in later years, likely have interactions with the carceral system, whereas your child will be privileged. As equity is our most important value, the privileged need to face more struggle, and the future oppressed need to be able to have more enjoyment in their lives.

NP and a teacher. I recognize this is a troll post, but you're right about one thing. The kids who are acting out like this are likely to end up incarcerated, especially if they're not taught that inappropriate behavior has negative consequences. In most cases it's a parenting issue and the lax discipline policies in schools are doing them no favors. There are also kids with attentive parents who have serious mental health issues and need a lot more support than a public school system can provide.

Thank you for being honest that worthless parenting is a big contributor to this problem. It is.

I agree strongly with the teacher. It’s a parenting problem. The problematic children aren’t special needs.They’re hyper, unfocused and don’t get enough parent attention. Focus is a learned skill, so is not talking out of turn.

Part of the problem also is that schools can’t discipline or remove kids, and of course their parents don’t either.

All of them? How do you know? My kid had multiple head injuries, plus preexisting special needs. You’d have no idea if your child was in class with him. No professional who’s heard our story has anything negative to say about my patenting, but believe me, they walk in the door wondering. Are there many kids whose behavior stems from parenting problems? Possible. But not ALL. That’s so insulting. Look up Phineas Gage if you think my child’s misbehavior was my fault.

You’re arguing to assume zebras not horses when you hear galloping animals. It’s just absurd. Every kid who is misbehaving is not Phineas Gage. Do you care about the well-behaved, determined students in nightmare rooms because of poorly behaving kids? Are each of them as special as yours, or does the fact that you’ve spent a lot of time interacting with ‘professionals’ plural reenacting the Good Will Hunting ‘it’s not your fault’ scene sum you up?

Come on. Get over yourself.

Why yes, it would be easier and cheaper to just forget about kids with special needs. But that's why we have laws protecting them.