Anonymous wrote:I'm new to my husband's family. First time staying at the in-laws. The main bathroom in the hallway does not have a doorknob. This is where I'm to shower and get ready with two other families.

I asked my husband if we could check into a hotel but he said it would hurt his moms feelings.

If you’re newly married and your husband is prioritizing his mother’s feelings over your comfort it’s probably a bad sign

Anonymous wrote:I'm new to my husband's family. First time staying at the in-laws. The main bathroom in the hallway does not have a doorknob. This is where I'm to shower and get ready with two other families.

I asked my husband if we could check into a hotel but he said it would hurt his moms feelings.

Stuff a hand towel in to the hole?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a twist on this thread. How about clueless house guests? I’m hosting SIL and she arrived over the weekend for an 8 day stay. We have had numerous discussions and conflicts in the past about how disruptive her visits are to the kids sleep. Both kids have sleep disorders and my biggest stressor in life is getting my youngest to sleep and ensuring she gets the maximum sleep possible. My husband and I were looking forward to sleeping in Saturday morning (only day for the next week) and was woken up at 6:40am to giggling and screaming laughter from SIL and daughter together in the next room. SIL seemed confused when husband went in and asked them to be quiet and asking why daughter was awake. My son woke up moments later. I couldn’t fall asleep after that. Daughter was up almost 2 hours earlier than a normal Saturday. And his family wonders why visits are so exhausting!

How old are your kids that you expect them to sleep until 9am or later? 6:40 is a typical waking time for young kids and it sounds like they were staying in their room. I’d be interested to hear your SILs take on this visit.

All three of my kids are professional sleepers at 5, 7, 9. If we let them they'll sleep until 10 every morning.

Then you do not provide age appropriate bedtimes. This does make your poor children good sleepers. It makes them chronically exhausted. Good sleepers sleep 7/8pm to 7/8am.

Anonymous wrote:I'm new to my husband's family. First time staying at the in-laws. The main bathroom in the hallway does not have a doorknob. This is where I'm to shower and get ready with two other families.

I asked my husband if we could check into a hotel but he said it would hurt his moms feelings.

Go buy a doorknob and install it ffs.

I have my MIL coming with her ex husband, and SIL/BIL’ s family. It’s not a huge group but SIL and MIL are adamant that they HAVE to bring something…which will be from Costco picked up the day before, left out overnight and sat in a car for hours. So we will all have diarrhea the next day from the cheesecake or whatever they didn’t keep at a safe temp. I think it’s actually part of their weight management strategy.

MIL has been told that none of her siblings are allowed to drop by as they are all fighting over their mother’s estate. MIL and one of her siblings is driving over to confront another sibling who is squatting in their mother’s house. One bingo card that we get a call from the police to pick her up as they all get in physical altercations. One bingo card that she comes back with a car full of crap that her and her sibling got out of the house. One bingo card that yet another sibling shows up at our house to hear the tale. These are UMC boomers.

SIL has made all these suggestions on foods to have and what is the best, just the best to add into whatever. I will oblige and I guarantee that she and her family will have eaten right before coming over.

I'm new to my husband's family. First time staying at the in-laws. The main bathroom in the hallway does not have a doorknob. This is where I'm to shower and get ready with two other families.

I asked my husband if we could check into a hotel but he said it would hurt his moms feelings.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m from Canada. My parents turn it to 55 over night, everyone has great bedding. I don’t do that in my own home but it doesn’t bother me.

I'm from Germany. Windows are opened every night, year 'round. The down comforters everyone sleeps with ensure you stay warm. Drives my husband nuts when it snows onto the window sills.

How cold does it get at night in Germany? All the windows?

We did this in college and in my apartments in my 20s even when temps were in the teens. It's the only way to deal with older radiators and shared piping, especially if you're in a multi-family place.

We live in Maine and do this. It's awesome. ❄️

Keep them coming this thread is so funny.

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Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hey, we are in Florida for Thanksgiving, no one is cold, house is nice, no need to worry about the meals BUT...MIL invited her nieces and nephews who DH cannot stand and she forgot to tell him about that. Until last night. Until we were already in the house. He is beyond livid. Yes the house is pretty big for everyone but he doesn't want to be in the same room with them. He insists we get another place to stay and just show up for dinner. I am having so much fun with this drama.

We need to know why DH hates his cousins. 🍿

Former addicts (meth, alcohol, you name it - they've done in). Apparently they are on the road to recovery, AA, rehabs. According to MIL, "they didn't have an easy life". According to DH, "that's such BS". Doesn't want our kids to be near them.

I’m sorry, that sounds awful.

It is awful. I already told MIL "what were you thinking about inviting a bunch of addicts to a house with young children?" She responded with "you can't pick your family." They are her sister's kids, she somehow feels responsible for them. They are all in their 30s and 40s, how much responsibility can a 76-yo woman possibly take upon herself? Once an addict, always an addict.

Are they actively using during the meal, stealing the tv or talking about drugs?
If they are in recovery what is the issue?
I understand not enabling addiction, or being the victim of one but WTF with hating someone because they are an addict?!

Call me a snob, but I don't want my family to be surrounded by addicts, holidays or not. I don't condone it. They claim they are in recovery but had many stints in rehab. No, I don't want them around my young , vulnerable children. I've interacted with them before, they are not pleasant people to be around.

Then the issue is that they are crappy people, not that they are addicts. Quit painting all recovering addicts with the same brush. You sound awful.

yes, 100%

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hey, we are in Florida for Thanksgiving, no one is cold, house is nice, no need to worry about the meals BUT...MIL invited her nieces and nephews who DH cannot stand and she forgot to tell him about that. Until last night. Until we were already in the house. He is beyond livid. Yes the house is pretty big for everyone but he doesn't want to be in the same room with them. He insists we get another place to stay and just show up for dinner. I am having so much fun with this drama.

We need to know why DH hates his cousins. 🍿

Former addicts (meth, alcohol, you name it - they've done in). Apparently they are on the road to recovery, AA, rehabs. According to MIL, "they didn't have an easy life". According to DH, "that's such BS". Doesn't want our kids to be near them.

I’m sorry, that sounds awful.

It is awful. I already told MIL "what were you thinking about inviting a bunch of addicts to a house with young children?" She responded with "you can't pick your family." They are her sister's kids, she somehow feels responsible for them. They are all in their 30s and 40s, how much responsibility can a 76-yo woman possibly take upon herself? Once an addict, always an addict.

Wait- former addicts, recovered? Or active?

Based on her other replies in the thread, she doesn't believe there is a difference.

Anonymous wrote:I have a twist on this thread. How about clueless house guests? I’m hosting SIL and she arrived over the weekend for an 8 day stay. We have had numerous discussions and conflicts in the past about how disruptive her visits are to the kids sleep. Both kids have sleep disorders and my biggest stressor in life is getting my youngest to sleep and ensuring she gets the maximum sleep possible. My husband and I were looking forward to sleeping in Saturday morning (only day for the next week) and was woken up at 6:40am to giggling and screaming laughter from SIL and daughter together in the next room. SIL seemed confused when husband went in and asked them to be quiet and asking why daughter was awake. My son woke up moments later. I couldn’t fall asleep after that. Daughter was up almost 2 hours earlier than a normal Saturday. And his family wonders why visits are so exhausting!

OMG, too long.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hey, we are in Florida for Thanksgiving, no one is cold, house is nice, no need to worry about the meals BUT...MIL invited her nieces and nephews who DH cannot stand and she forgot to tell him about that. Until last night. Until we were already in the house. He is beyond livid. Yes the house is pretty big for everyone but he doesn't want to be in the same room with them. He insists we get another place to stay and just show up for dinner. I am having so much fun with this drama.

We need to know why DH hates his cousins. 🍿

Former addicts (meth, alcohol, you name it - they've done in). Apparently they are on the road to recovery, AA, rehabs. According to MIL, "they didn't have an easy life". According to DH, "that's such BS". Doesn't want our kids to be near them.

I’m sorry, that sounds awful.

It is awful. I already told MIL "what were you thinking about inviting a bunch of addicts to a house with young children?" She responded with "you can't pick your family." They are her sister's kids, she somehow feels responsible for them. They are all in their 30s and 40s, how much responsibility can a 76-yo woman possibly take upon herself? Once an addict, always an addict.

Are they actively using during the meal, stealing the tv or talking about drugs?
If they are in recovery what is the issue?
I understand not enabling addiction, or being the victim of one but WTF with hating someone because they are an addict?!

Call me a snob, but I don't want my family to be surrounded by addicts, holidays or not. I don't condone it. They claim they are in recovery but had many stints in rehab. No, I don't want them around my young , vulnerable children. I've interacted with them before, they are not pleasant people to be around.

Then the issue is that they are crappy people, not that they are addicts. Quit painting all recovering addicts with the same brush. You sound awful.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hey, we are in Florida for Thanksgiving, no one is cold, house is nice, no need to worry about the meals BUT...MIL invited her nieces and nephews who DH cannot stand and she forgot to tell him about that. Until last night. Until we were already in the house. He is beyond livid. Yes the house is pretty big for everyone but he doesn't want to be in the same room with them. He insists we get another place to stay and just show up for dinner. I am having so much fun with this drama.

We need to know why DH hates his cousins. 🍿

Former addicts (meth, alcohol, you name it - they've done in). Apparently they are on the road to recovery, AA, rehabs. According to MIL, "they didn't have an easy life". According to DH, "that's such BS". Doesn't want our kids to be near them.

I’m sorry, that sounds awful.

It is awful. I already told MIL "what were you thinking about inviting a bunch of addicts to a house with young children?" She responded with "you can't pick your family." They are her sister's kids, she somehow feels responsible for them. They are all in their 30s and 40s, how much responsibility can a 76-yo woman possibly take upon herself? Once an addict, always an addict.

Wait- former addicts, recovered? Or active?

Anonymous wrote:PP: What’s in the red container in the basement freezer?

+1 Inquiring minds want to know.

For confusing guests we had my SIL and BIL. After Thanksgiving dinner last year we had coffee (they are coffee lovers and drink it constantly), and SIL asked for almond milk. I didn't have any, and felt like a terrible host - had I forgotten they drink almond milk? She declined to have any coffee with her pie.

So Friday morning I woke up at the crack of dawn to run out and get almond milk. What did she do? She drank the 2%.