I’ve had a nice Mother’s Day, but I’ve learned I have to be very clear and direct about how I’d like the day to go. Like, I can’t just say I’d like to sleep in; I have to spell out that I also don’t want to wake up to hangry kids and no coffee. And when I say I don’t want to cook, I also don’t want to be the one buying and marinating the steaks he wants to grill.

No one did anything wrong but I spent the whole day schlepping to a travel soccer game, standing in a cold field and then driving far back. And I have a migraine. Blargh.

I have become a friend believer that if you want to have a nice mother's day then unfortunately you need to plan it yourself. This year my husband has COVID so Ive been doing everything this whole week myself. So double the work. Today he didn't make any effort at all to do anything for me beyond buying his usual photo book mother day present. Why kind of present is that anyways? I cooked all the meals, took myself and son on a picnic. No flowers from him, card, nothing, he could have had something delivered at the very least. It's extremely thoughtless.

I have become a firm believer that is you want to have a nice mother's day

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid started being violent to me just because I was not willing to eat the gluten- full carrot cake he bought for me. He knows I’m very sensitive to gluten and I’ve been avoiding sweets for medical reasons. If I eat that cake, I will have a downstream of scary symptoms.
It’s the worst Mother’s Day I ever had.
Pls help

Are you OK PP? Like are you physically safe now? It sounds awful, I'm so sorry.

Thanks for asking. I’m away from home, trying to recover from the physical and emotional attack. Headache has increased. My husband is at home, watching tv with kid, as couch potatoes. It’s the only thing they do together.
I’m not sure how my day will end when I return home from my walk along the Potomac River.

Anonymous wrote:I love excuses to shower the people I love with affection. I don't get the "it's a hallmark event" BS about boycotting an opportunity to celebrate my mom. I just learned today that a dear friend lost her husband. Life is short, people! Take every chance you've got to demonstrate your gratitude and love for the people you're lucky to have in your life.

signed, a divorced woman whose ExH refused to celebrate her for any "holidays" at all, including anniversaries, Christmas, birthdays, etc...

this

Anonymous wrote:My kid started being violent to me just because I was not willing to eat the gluten- full carrot cake he bought for me. He knows I’m very sensitive to gluten and I’ve been avoiding sweets for medical reasons. If I eat that cake, I will have a downstream of scary symptoms.
It’s the worst Mother’s Day I ever had.
Pls help

My son did this stuff when he was 13/14. Diagnosed with ASD/ADHD. He would push me to the ground and start kicking me. Tore cabinet doors off the hinges. He stopped by the time he was 15. I have three other kids that had no real issues, so it’s not entirely me and my husband.
Testosterone at that age can be crazy. Normal anger suddenly turns to insane rage.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid started being violent to me just because I was not willing to eat the gluten- full carrot cake he bought for me. He knows I’m very sensitive to gluten and I’ve been avoiding sweets for medical reasons. If I eat that cake, I will have a downstream of scary symptoms.
It’s the worst Mother’s Day I ever had.
Pls help

Are you OK PP? Like are you physically safe now? It sounds awful, I'm so sorry.

She is ok. “Gluten sensitive” is not a medical condition.

Really? I get eczema if I eat wheat but I don’t die. Seems like a medical issue to me.

DP

Anonymous wrote:Everyone just lower or eliminate your expectations right now and everything will be fine.

+1

I took a two-week vacation and returned today on Mother’s Day. When I arrived home, spouse had a simple lunch waiting for me.

You’ll be happier if you do something you enjoy and don’t expect others to plan your day for you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid started being violent to me just because I was not willing to eat the gluten- full carrot cake he bought for me. He knows I’m very sensitive to gluten and I’ve been avoiding sweets for medical reasons. If I eat that cake, I will have a downstream of scary symptoms.
It’s the worst Mother’s Day I ever had.
Pls help

Are you OK PP? Like are you physically safe now? It sounds awful, I'm so sorry.

She is ok. “Gluten sensitive” is not a medical condition.

Anonymous wrote:My kid started being violent to me just because I was not willing to eat the gluten- full carrot cake he bought for me. He knows I’m very sensitive to gluten and I’ve been avoiding sweets for medical reasons. If I eat that cake, I will have a downstream of scary symptoms.
It’s the worst Mother’s Day I ever had.
Pls help

Are you OK PP? Like are you physically safe now? It sounds awful, I'm so sorry.

I don’t think there is anything wrong with going out the day before on the same weekend. We do the same for Valentine’s Day. If he didn’t do anything, that would bother me.

I often make a back up reservation in case DH forgets or I don’t like his choice. He did fine this year and I canceled my back up brunch reservations.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My complaint is that I have a mother figure who is probably expecting something. Every year it’s agony because she doesn’t live close by, she has her own family (who are hopefully taking her out so lunch is not an option), I’ve never sent anyone flowers so I don’t know how to do this and trying to make myself research it is too much. I’ve sent her a card on Thursday. I hope it gets there on time.

Holidays are my curse because I don’t like them, I only remotely like new years but that’s it.

This is me. I don’t give a crap about mother’s day and my mom doesn’t either, but I always feel obligated to send her something (that she’s not going to like anyway).

I think if she doesn’t like it (and not just faking it) you can stop with the charade.

Thanks, actually I did this year. I called her today and we talked for an hour, and as far as I can tell she enjoyed that!

Anonymous wrote:My tween ran away today because he said I was a mean mom and hated me. I’m hoping he’ll return by the evening.

Tween? That’s awfully young. Do you know where he might be? Did you call the police?

(I'm PP) And yes, I buy lots of random gifts for people throughout the year when I see something that would be perfect for them. It could be something big or little. I don't need a formal holiday to open my pocketbook or my heart, but I also don't believe in boycotting holidays.