Anonymous
Post 02/17/2024 08:40     Subject: Sexual Assault By Uber Driver on Teen in DC

I am a parent of teens and college age kids. We use Uber on occasion to help with driving. Those of you who judge, what are you expecting working parents to do exactly?? Kids need to get to & from school, jobs and activities. That means walking, metro and getting rides from us and sometimes Uber. We don't have family or any other "village" to help with driving so we do use Uber Teen when needed. With Uber Teen all the rides are tracked by us in real time, and we are typically on the phone with our kids too.
Walk a mile in my shoes.
Anonymous
Post 02/16/2024 22:37     Subject: Sexual Assault By Uber Driver on Teen in DC

Anonymous wrote:For all the people talking about public transportation, do you really think there’s less risk of sexual assault waiting at a bus stop of walking home after getting off the bus? My teens do ride the public bus but I tell them to make sure it doesn’t look like anyone is following them off the bus. That seems to me a much higher risk. After dark, I’d rather have them take an Uber where the driver is registered, named and tracked — anyone can be on a public bus and get off with you. Same with metro.

And I would much much rather my teen take an Uber home from a party than get in a car with someone that’s been driving or using weed. My kid doesn’t drink or use pot and I have a standing “call me and I’ll pick you up” rule but if for some reason I wasn’t available, Uber is 100% a safer choice.

At the end of the day, ever choice has risks. If your kid takes an Uber to dance lessons because you can’t drive them, is it less risky for them to drop dance? They may replace that healthy activity with a much riskier way to spend their after school time.

Parenting teens is very difficult and there are very few clear answers. I felt like the answers were much more binary when they were preschoolers.




First of all, there is significant overlap between the public transportation advocates and parents who are also fine with Uber.

And second, I think there is very little risk in either scenario, because I know how to read and interpret statistics and I am not afraid of the bogeyman.

The only truly dangerous scenario that you mentioned would be getting in the car with someone who has been drinking or on drugs. And i think most responsible parents have the “call me and I will come get you” agreement in place.
Anonymous
Post 02/16/2024 22:22     Subject: Sexual Assault By Uber Driver on Teen in DC

Anonymous wrote:For all the people talking about public transportation, do you really think there’s less risk of sexual assault waiting at a bus stop of walking home after getting off the bus? My teens do ride the public bus but I tell them to make sure it doesn’t look like anyone is following them off the bus. That seems to me a much higher risk. After dark, I’d rather have them take an Uber where the driver is registered, named and tracked — anyone can be on a public bus and get off with you. Same with metro.

And I would much much rather my teen take an Uber home from a party than get in a car with someone that’s been driving or using weed. My kid doesn’t drink or use pot and I have a standing “call me and I’ll pick you up” rule but if for some reason I wasn’t available, Uber is 100% a safer choice.

At the end of the day, ever choice has risks. If your kid takes an Uber to dance lessons because you can’t drive them, is it less risky for them to drop dance? They may replace that healthy activity with a much riskier way to spend their after school time.

Parenting teens is very difficult and there are very few clear answers. I felt like the answers were much more binary when they were preschoolers.



I’m personally not feeling Uber for my kid but…Amen to this. It’s SO much harder now.
Anonymous
Post 02/16/2024 21:34     Subject: Sexual Assault By Uber Driver on Teen in DC

For all the people talking about public transportation, do you really think there’s less risk of sexual assault waiting at a bus stop of walking home after getting off the bus? My teens do ride the public bus but I tell them to make sure it doesn’t look like anyone is following them off the bus. That seems to me a much higher risk. After dark, I’d rather have them take an Uber where the driver is registered, named and tracked — anyone can be on a public bus and get off with you. Same with metro.

And I would much much rather my teen take an Uber home from a party than get in a car with someone that’s been driving or using weed. My kid doesn’t drink or use pot and I have a standing “call me and I’ll pick you up” rule but if for some reason I wasn’t available, Uber is 100% a safer choice.

At the end of the day, ever choice has risks. If your kid takes an Uber to dance lessons because you can’t drive them, is it less risky for them to drop dance? They may replace that healthy activity with a much riskier way to spend their after school time.

Parenting teens is very difficult and there are very few clear answers. I felt like the answers were much more binary when they were preschoolers.


Anonymous
Post 02/16/2024 20:26     Subject: Re:Sexual Assault By Uber Driver on Teen in DC

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Some of you (or maybe just one persistent poster, it’s hard to tell) have VERY sheltered teens. You are ultimately doing them an incredible disservice, because while it is possible for them to be assaulted in an Uber, on a bus, on a train, etc. it is statistically unlikely. It is, however, extremely likely that the excessive coddling and refusal to allow even the slightest bit of independence will negatively impact their self esteem and decision making abilities for the rest of their lives.


Sorry, I’m not taking any chances that my teen could be sexually assaulted in some quest to help make her/him independent. We can go about it in many different safer ways.


You could, but you won’t. Anyone who takes an “I’m not taking any chances” stance simply doesn’t have a firm grasp on reality. Good luck to your teen.


You have no grasp of reality if you think there are no cases of assault or it won’t happen to your child. Good luck to your teen. They are going to need it.


Dp. I don't think anyone thinks there are zero chances of being assaulted or even shot. Normap precations of course but you have to live your life

Living life requires putting children alone in car with a stranger?


I wouldn't put a 10 year old in uber but 16 plus sure

You would be irresponsible, but there are irresponsible parents as we know.


Agree to disagree

Of course, an irresponsible parent would disagree.


And you are the judge? Sorry but a 16-18 year old can certainly handle being in an uber alone. But honestly who cares whar you think.


You care obviously.
I guess the teen that the op talked about could handle the Uber and is making this up according to you.
Anonymous
Post 02/16/2024 20:23     Subject: Sexual Assault By Uber Driver on Teen in DC

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Who puts a teen in a car alone with a stranger?


Millions of people, all the time. What are you going to do? Chaperone your child to college?


Yup! My DD takes Uber/Lyft all the time at college, normally "alone". It's how you get to urgent care when ill, a doctor appt when you have a broken bone, PT when getting treatment after bone heals, to/from the airport on breaks, etc. However, my DD knows to share the ride with me unless she's with a group of people. I then screenshot the driver/car info and make her text when she gets safely to the destination.

Anonymous
Post 02/16/2024 17:19     Subject: Re:Sexual Assault By Uber Driver on Teen in DC

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Some of you (or maybe just one persistent poster, it’s hard to tell) have VERY sheltered teens. You are ultimately doing them an incredible disservice, because while it is possible for them to be assaulted in an Uber, on a bus, on a train, etc. it is statistically unlikely. It is, however, extremely likely that the excessive coddling and refusal to allow even the slightest bit of independence will negatively impact their self esteem and decision making abilities for the rest of their lives.


Sorry, I’m not taking any chances that my teen could be sexually assaulted in some quest to help make her/him independent. We can go about it in many different safer ways.


You could, but you won’t. Anyone who takes an “I’m not taking any chances” stance simply doesn’t have a firm grasp on reality. Good luck to your teen.


You have no grasp of reality if you think there are no cases of assault or it won’t happen to your child. Good luck to your teen. They are going to need it.


Dp. I don't think anyone thinks there are zero chances of being assaulted or even shot. Normap precations of course but you have to live your life

Living life requires putting children alone in car with a stranger?


I wouldn't put a 10 year old in uber but 16 plus sure

You would be irresponsible, but there are irresponsible parents as we know.


Agree to disagree

Of course, an irresponsible parent would disagree.


And you are the judge? Sorry but a 16-18 year old can certainly handle being in an uber alone. But honestly who cares whar you think.
Anonymous
Post 02/16/2024 16:08     Subject: Re:Sexual Assault By Uber Driver on Teen in DC

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Some of you (or maybe just one persistent poster, it’s hard to tell) have VERY sheltered teens. You are ultimately doing them an incredible disservice, because while it is possible for them to be assaulted in an Uber, on a bus, on a train, etc. it is statistically unlikely. It is, however, extremely likely that the excessive coddling and refusal to allow even the slightest bit of independence will negatively impact their self esteem and decision making abilities for the rest of their lives.


Sorry, I’m not taking any chances that my teen could be sexually assaulted in some quest to help make her/him independent. We can go about it in many different safer ways.


You could, but you won’t. Anyone who takes an “I’m not taking any chances” stance simply doesn’t have a firm grasp on reality. Good luck to your teen.


You have no grasp of reality if you think there are no cases of assault or it won’t happen to your child. Good luck to your teen. They are going to need it.


Dp. I don't think anyone thinks there are zero chances of being assaulted or even shot. Normap precations of course but you have to live your life

Living life requires putting children alone in car with a stranger?


I wouldn't put a 10 year old in uber but 16 plus sure

You would be irresponsible, but there are irresponsible parents as we know.


Agree to disagree

Of course, an irresponsible parent would disagree.


+1 anything to justify their kids’ use of Ubers because they are lazy and can’t figure it out.
Anonymous
Post 02/16/2024 15:16     Subject: Re:Sexual Assault By Uber Driver on Teen in DC

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Some of you (or maybe just one persistent poster, it’s hard to tell) have VERY sheltered teens. You are ultimately doing them an incredible disservice, because while it is possible for them to be assaulted in an Uber, on a bus, on a train, etc. it is statistically unlikely. It is, however, extremely likely that the excessive coddling and refusal to allow even the slightest bit of independence will negatively impact their self esteem and decision making abilities for the rest of their lives.


Sorry, I’m not taking any chances that my teen could be sexually assaulted in some quest to help make her/him independent. We can go about it in many different safer ways.


You could, but you won’t. Anyone who takes an “I’m not taking any chances” stance simply doesn’t have a firm grasp on reality. Good luck to your teen.


You have no grasp of reality if you think there are no cases of assault or it won’t happen to your child. Good luck to your teen. They are going to need it.


Dp. I don't think anyone thinks there are zero chances of being assaulted or even shot. Normap precations of course but you have to live your life

Living life requires putting children alone in car with a stranger?


I wouldn't put a 10 year old in uber but 16 plus sure

You would be irresponsible, but there are irresponsible parents as we know.


Agree to disagree

Of course, an irresponsible parent would disagree.
Anonymous
Post 02/16/2024 15:14     Subject: Sexual Assault By Uber Driver on Teen in DC

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Uber is a shitty concept. Especially for teens. I get that the convenience is a new innovation for the suburbs, but a regulated public agency is the better way to go. Cities have been doing this forever.

If you choose to live in the suburbs, then you are deciding that you are willing to drive your kids around. If you don’t want that, move to the city.


The US really is a dystopian hell-scape.


Not sure what makes you say this as a response to this post. The poster is right. How do you think people do it in other countries, did it before Uber...?


You can’t be serious. Other countries that aren’t completely and utterly beholden to the auto industry use a combination of reliable public transportation (busses, trains, subways, trams), safe walking paths, and safe biking paths. Even outside of major cities!


I'm not from the US actually which is why I posted this. Yes, large cities are well-equipped. It's not the case if you live anywhere else. As someone from a rural area outside of a small town, I went nowhere as a teen unless my parents could take me. The small town only had buses (as most small towns do) and those required such long waits walking was better. But then again I had to be driven to that small town, or walk 1.5 hour to get there.


Fair enough, but allow me to point out that US suburbs are DECIDEDLY NOT “rural”, particularly suburbs of major cities such as anything in the Washington DC area. There is zero reason why we can’t have infrastructure for people (including teens and kids) to get around efficiently without using cars.


I’m the PP who made the suburban/city comparison. I’m not sure we are in agreement on the outcome (pro or anti Uber) but I do agree with what you said here. I suppose we can have more public infrastructure to be less car dependent here (though everyone moving here knew what they were getting: a totally car dependent lifestyle.) But it needs to be a tightly regulated public agency and NOT a private corporation.

My kid is not getting in a Uber alone. And I grew up taking cabs along with other modes of public transportation. The point being: cabs were regulated public transportation.
Anonymous
Post 02/16/2024 14:41     Subject: Re:Sexual Assault By Uber Driver on Teen in DC

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Some of you (or maybe just one persistent poster, it’s hard to tell) have VERY sheltered teens. You are ultimately doing them an incredible disservice, because while it is possible for them to be assaulted in an Uber, on a bus, on a train, etc. it is statistically unlikely. It is, however, extremely likely that the excessive coddling and refusal to allow even the slightest bit of independence will negatively impact their self esteem and decision making abilities for the rest of their lives.


Sorry, I’m not taking any chances that my teen could be sexually assaulted in some quest to help make her/him independent. We can go about it in many different safer ways.


You could, but you won’t. Anyone who takes an “I’m not taking any chances” stance simply doesn’t have a firm grasp on reality. Good luck to your teen.


You have no grasp of reality if you think there are no cases of assault or it won’t happen to your child. Good luck to your teen. They are going to need it.


Dp. I don't think anyone thinks there are zero chances of being assaulted or even shot. Normap precations of course but you have to live your life

Living life requires putting children alone in car with a stranger?


I wouldn't put a 10 year old in uber but 16 plus sure

You would be irresponsible, but there are irresponsible parents as we know.


Agree to disagree
Anonymous
Post 02/16/2024 14:27     Subject: Sexual Assault By Uber Driver on Teen in DC

Anonymous wrote:Is it safer for your teen to drive or take an Uber?

https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/products/databriefs/db37.htm#leadingcauses


My parents' choice to keep me from having a car as a teen looks more and more rational the older I get.
Anonymous
Post 02/16/2024 12:26     Subject: Sexual Assault By Uber Driver on Teen in DC

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Uber is a shitty concept. Especially for teens. I get that the convenience is a new innovation for the suburbs, but a regulated public agency is the better way to go. Cities have been doing this forever.

If you choose to live in the suburbs, then you are deciding that you are willing to drive your kids around. If you don’t want that, move to the city.


The US really is a dystopian hell-scape.


Not sure what makes you say this as a response to this post. The poster is right. How do you think people do it in other countries, did it before Uber...?


You can’t be serious. Other countries that aren’t completely and utterly beholden to the auto industry use a combination of reliable public transportation (busses, trains, subways, trams), safe walking paths, and safe biking paths. Even outside of major cities!


I'm not from the US actually which is why I posted this. Yes, large cities are well-equipped. It's not the case if you live anywhere else. As someone from a rural area outside of a small town, I went nowhere as a teen unless my parents could take me. The small town only had buses (as most small towns do) and those required such long waits walking was better. But then again I had to be driven to that small town, or walk 1.5 hour to get there.


Fair enough, but allow me to point out that US suburbs are DECIDEDLY NOT “rural”, particularly suburbs of major cities such as anything in the Washington DC area. There is zero reason why we can’t have infrastructure for people (including teens and kids) to get around efficiently without using cars.
Anonymous
Post 02/16/2024 11:58     Subject: Sexual Assault By Uber Driver on Teen in DC

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:How is a 16 year old male more vulnerable to sexual assault by someone driving a car than a 50 year old female? Spell it out for me.

Interesting how no one responded to this question.


Because it is a stupid question.
Anonymous
Post 02/16/2024 11:54     Subject: Sexual Assault By Uber Driver on Teen in DC

Anonymous wrote:How is a 16 year old male more vulnerable to sexual assault by someone driving a car than a 50 year old female? Spell it out for me.

Interesting how no one responded to this question.