Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m really confused by this notion that grandparents owe it to their grandkids to pay for private if they can? Am I missing something?

My parents are well off and paid for my college, helped with our first house, and contribute heavily to grandkids’ 529s. I feel like that’s a lot. I would *never* dare request that they help make private school happen on top of that, although I suppose they could technically. Are the people grumbling about stingy grandparents mad that they didn’t pay for private school specifically? Did they help in other ways?

My parents pay for our kids private school, our kids go to the same school their grandfather attended and they offered to help before the kids started preschool. We are civil servants and couldn’t afford private pm just our salaries but I imagine when we inherit money later in life we could also pay for our own grandchildren to attend private schools and college.

No legacy college admission advantages for your kids anymore. Hahahahahaha

Why do you say that? Legacy is not going anywhere at most schools.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m really confused by this notion that grandparents owe it to their grandkids to pay for private if they can? Am I missing something?

My parents are well off and paid for my college, helped with our first house, and contribute heavily to grandkids’ 529s. I feel like that’s a lot. I would *never* dare request that they help make private school happen on top of that, although I suppose they could technically. Are the people grumbling about stingy grandparents mad that they didn’t pay for private school specifically? Did they help in other ways?

My parents pay for our kids private school, our kids go to the same school their grandfather attended and they offered to help before the kids started preschool. We are civil servants and couldn’t afford private pm just our salaries but I imagine when we inherit money later in life we could also pay for our own grandchildren to attend private schools and college.

No legacy college admission advantages for your kids anymore. Hahahahahaha

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Please let this thread die. How do people afford anything??? Some people have tons of money duh. Such a silly question.

It’s actually not. There are some that aren’t extremely rich or extremely poor at these schools and it’s a legitimate question how a middle class family can do it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m really confused by this notion that grandparents owe it to their grandkids to pay for private if they can? Am I missing something?

My parents are well off and paid for my college, helped with our first house, and contribute heavily to grandkids’ 529s. I feel like that’s a lot. I would *never* dare request that they help make private school happen on top of that, although I suppose they could technically. Are the people grumbling about stingy grandparents mad that they didn’t pay for private school specifically? Did they help in other ways?

My parents pay for our kids private school, our kids go to the same school their grandfather attended and they offered to help before the kids started preschool. We are civil servants and couldn’t afford private pm just our salaries but I imagine when we inherit money later in life we could also pay for our own grandchildren to attend private schools and college.

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Anonymous wrote:Our oldest and their spouse make the same as OP and sent their kid to public elementary school EOTP. After concluding reluctantly that the local middle and high schools weren’t viable options, they started playing the lottery and applying to privates. It was the last thing they wanted to do because they really didn’t want their kids going to school with a bunch of rich kids, plus they honestly didn’t want to put such a huge dent in their lifestyle. There are lots of things that can be done with kids with that kind of money that can benefit their growth just as much as private education.

Long story short, their kid got into several well known privates in DC but with virtually no financial aid. One very good school upped their offer to $10k in the end, but that still left a price tag of $40k plus and would only go up and they didn’t want to pay it. In the end, they sweated through the lottery and landed at a good option.

We have a lot more money than they do and we are very close with our grandkids. They never asked us to help and we never considered it. I think they knew we shared their philosophical revulsion at the idea of elite private schooling and also knew that we knew it was their choice entirely to live in the school district where they do.

Move along…

NP. It’s philosophically revolting yes. And if I were a parent who had to rely on my parents to pay my child’s private school tuition I’d be embarrassed.

I'm amused at calling private schools philosophically revolting while refusing to send your kids to the locally zoned schools and fishing around for a lottery and lucking out.

Err.... at least I'm not a hypocrite.

Except you missed the part about me being the grandparent. I didn’t do any fishing, and I didn’t write any checks either. No hypocrite here.

As for my kid, it doesn’t make one a hypocrite to look for alternatives to bleak public schools that don’t include rich kid schools. There’s a middle ground after all.

You are the hypocrite for talking about "philosophically revolting" when it comes to some people's decisions while justifying your own family's decision, which to others, could be "philosophically revolting" because your family is still choosing to say those kids aren't good enough for my kids, no matter how much they spin it. It's like people with BLM signs and "Be the Change" signs in front of their houses while living in all white neighborhoods and freaking out about having children in majority black schools.

Has nothing to do with skin color. Our grandkids are white and attended a Title I public school where the overwhelmingly majority of the students are black. My grandson watched a classic Disney movie with me the other day and asked “why are there so many white faces?” The charter school they are moving less than 15 percent white.

The schools their parents are avoiding are extremely low performing. That, and that alone, is why they’re avoiding them.

You're still a hypocrite because no matter what story you're telling us (cool story, grandma! your grandkid spotted all the nasty white faces! how enlightened!) your family is still going out of their way to avoid another school which they are zoned for. That is it in a nutshell. As long as they do it, you have no business decrying people's decisions to go to private schools without coming across as a massive hypocrite of the worst kind. Which you are.

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:We make less than that and make it work. We simply prioritize education and cut expenses in other areas. No fancy Xmas ski vacations, no fancy cars, no cable TV, lower speed Internet, keep our cars for 20 years (and no leasing), live in an older house without fancy appliances, etc.

It is possible. It is all about priorities and choices.

This is what my parents did. TBH, it sucked being the “poor” kid.

And think about all the sacrifices your parents did for you… how ungrateful you are. They should have not cared and sent you to public.

Because people who send their kids to public do not care.

Unless they believe public to be the better option or they invest the same amount of money on their kids for other rlenriching activities, they clearly don’t.

If mom uses that money to get a boob job or if dad buys a new car every other year and send their kids to crappy public (FOR THEIR KIDS), yes, they clearly don’t value education.

If parents sacrifice everything (no cable or low speed internet for example), they clearly value private education and sacrifice A LOT for their kids.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Please let this thread die. How do people afford anything??? Some people have tons of money duh. Such a silly question.

It’s actually not. There are some that aren’t extremely rich or extremely poor at these schools and it’s a legitimate question how a middle class family can do it.

Anonymous wrote:Like many people, the cost of private school is insignificant for us. That is who should be attending these schools.

Anonymous wrote:There are some that aren’t extremely rich or extremely poor at these schools and it’s a legitimate question how a middle class family can do it.

Anonymous wrote:Please let this thread die. How do people afford anything??? Some people have tons of money duh. Such a silly question.