Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I cannot believe your wife would not allow it if she no longer has an interest in sex.

If my husband gained 50 pounds and had no interest in sex I would definitely look for an AP. No interest in leaving the marriage itself.

Same here, another DW. I cannot have sex with a obese person, I did not marry an obese person. I imagine it's even harder for a man, I mean, maybe he cannot get aroused anymore.

What makes you think they are obese? You can gain 50 pounds and not be obese, especially since if it's a tall man.

OP's wife is a woman, and a 50 lbs weight gain would make her obese. You can't force attraction.

Not necessarily.

I went from 138 to 188 pounds. I am 5' 8" and currently wear a size 10 in most clothing, size 12 in a few. I am overweight but not obese. And I was a size 2 at 138 on my wedding day.
You need to see the woman to make this call.
I am not saying I look the same, but a size 2 at 40 would be ridiculous for me. My rib cage was protruding back then. I look great at 170 pounds. So 18 pounds to lose, not 50.

Anyway, interesting that it is the wife not sleeping with him and not the other way round. I'd say she is the one not attracted to him, won't you?

I'm 47 y/o, 5'7 and 125 lbs and look great, I don't have any bones sticking out but I'm also very small boned - my wrist is 5.5 inches. Gisele is 5'11 and around 130 lbs and looks amazing. I've been married for 20 years, and I think it's a reasonable request and expectation in a relationship to have intimacy and stay in shape. A marriage is a romantic relationship, not a roommate situation.

Good for you.

I couldn't be 125 pounds. I definitely look better at 188 than 125. That's for sure.

I am not Giselle, and don't want to be. And where is her DH? Mine is here with me...

Giselle and Brady have essentially limitless options. It was Giselle who chose to leave. I am guessing you and your husband's options are much more limited, especially when you are overweight.

She chose to leave because her husband chose football over their family. All the options in the world to end up with a man who loves football more than he loves you and your kids. What good are those options?

She loves her children so much she's embarked on a campaign of child alienation against Mr. Brady.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Start with marriage counseling with your wife. Try to reconnect. Work at it. If you listen to hear and are open to changing things on your end, and her answer is still celibacy, tell her that you're not going to do that so she can make a choice. And if the answer is that you're opening up your marriage, you will have an easier and less risky time trying to meet someone.

Would you honestly still be sexually attracted to someone that is 50 pounds heavier than you first met?

I’ve gained 40, and my husband still seems pretty attracted to me. We have a fun and adventurous sex life and have throughout our marriage. It’s kind of an escape from day to day for the both of us.

+1

DH was previously engaged to a woman before we met( she broke it off to take a job abroad). She looked bigger than I do now ( from a pic I saw) throughout the entire time they dated. So I know my size does not bother him.

My weight bothers me some, but not to the extent of being too self conscious to enjoy our sex life. I am working to lose some weight just like I am working on other aspects of my life. But DH and I are enjoying the ride ( no pun intended).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Start with marriage counseling with your wife. Try to reconnect. Work at it. If you listen to hear and are open to changing things on your end, and her answer is still celibacy, tell her that you're not going to do that so she can make a choice. And if the answer is that you're opening up your marriage, you will have an easier and less risky time trying to meet someone.

Would you honestly still be sexually attracted to someone that is 50 pounds heavier than you first met?

I’ve gained 40, and my husband still seems pretty attracted to me. We have a fun and adventurous sex life and have throughout our marriage. It’s kind of an escape from day to day for the both of us.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I cannot believe your wife would not allow it if she no longer has an interest in sex.

If my husband gained 50 pounds and had no interest in sex I would definitely look for an AP. No interest in leaving the marriage itself.

Same here, another DW. I cannot have sex with a obese person, I did not marry an obese person. I imagine it's even harder for a man, I mean, maybe he cannot get aroused anymore.

What makes you think they are obese? You can gain 50 pounds and not be obese, especially since if it's a tall man.

OP's wife is a woman, and a 50 lbs weight gain would make her obese. You can't force attraction.

Not necessarily.

I went from 138 to 188 pounds. I am 5' 8" and currently wear a size 10 in most clothing, size 12 in a few. I am overweight but not obese. And I was a size 2 at 138 on my wedding day.
You need to see the woman to make this call.
I am not saying I look the same, but a size 2 at 40 would be ridiculous for me. My rib cage was protruding back then. I look great at 170 pounds. So 18 pounds to lose, not 50.

Anyway, interesting that it is the wife not sleeping with him and not the other way round. I'd say she is the one not attracted to him, won't you?

PP, unless you are like 5’9” that is obese. And unless you are like 6’5” you are very very overweight.

Did you create your own BMI calculator? It's not obese.

Technically true -- it's overweight and right on the cusp of obese according to the official government BMI standard. But the government doesn't have a monopoly on the definition of obese.

Lol, it’s these kind of silly games that keep our obesity epidemic going. Imagine believing the actual BMI calculator is lying to you to be mean or whatever.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I cannot believe your wife would not allow it if she no longer has an interest in sex.

If my husband gained 50 pounds and had no interest in sex I would definitely look for an AP. No interest in leaving the marriage itself.

Same here, another DW. I cannot have sex with a obese person, I did not marry an obese person. I imagine it's even harder for a man, I mean, maybe he cannot get aroused anymore.

What makes you think they are obese? You can gain 50 pounds and not be obese, especially since if it's a tall man.

OP's wife is a woman, and a 50 lbs weight gain would make her obese. You can't force attraction.

Not necessarily.

I went from 138 to 188 pounds. I am 5' 8" and currently wear a size 10 in most clothing, size 12 in a few. I am overweight but not obese. And I was a size 2 at 138 on my wedding day.
You need to see the woman to make this call.
I am not saying I look the same, but a size 2 at 40 would be ridiculous for me. My rib cage was protruding back then. I look great at 170 pounds. So 18 pounds to lose, not 50.

Anyway, interesting that it is the wife not sleeping with him and not the other way round. I'd say she is the one not attracted to him, won't you?

PP, unless you are like 5’9” that is obese. And unless you are like 6’5” you are very very overweight.

Did you create your own BMI calculator? It's not obese.

Technically true -- it's overweight and right on the cusp of obese according to the official government BMI standard. But the government doesn't have a monopoly on the definition of obese.

Lets extend your reasoning here. By your reasoning a BMI of 19.5 is right at the cusp of being underweight. Does it work in this direction too?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I cannot believe your wife would not allow it if she no longer has an interest in sex.

If my husband gained 50 pounds and had no interest in sex I would definitely look for an AP. No interest in leaving the marriage itself.

Same here, another DW. I cannot have sex with a obese person, I did not marry an obese person. I imagine it's even harder for a man, I mean, maybe he cannot get aroused anymore.

What makes you think they are obese? You can gain 50 pounds and not be obese, especially since if it's a tall man.

OP's wife is a woman, and a 50 lbs weight gain would make her obese. You can't force attraction.

Not necessarily.

I went from 138 to 188 pounds. I am 5' 8" and currently wear a size 10 in most clothing, size 12 in a few. I am overweight but not obese. And I was a size 2 at 138 on my wedding day.
You need to see the woman to make this call.
I am not saying I look the same, but a size 2 at 40 would be ridiculous for me. My rib cage was protruding back then. I look great at 170 pounds. So 18 pounds to lose, not 50.

Anyway, interesting that it is the wife not sleeping with him and not the other way round. I'd say she is the one not attracted to him, won't you?

I'm 47 y/o, 5'7 and 125 lbs and look great, I don't have any bones sticking out but I'm also very small boned - my wrist is 5.5 inches. Gisele is 5'11 and around 130 lbs and looks amazing. I've been married for 20 years, and I think it's a reasonable request and expectation in a relationship to have intimacy and stay in shape. A marriage is a romantic relationship, not a roommate situation.

Good for you.

I couldn't be 125 pounds. I definitely look better at 188 than 125. That's for sure.

I am not Giselle, and don't want to be. And where is her DH? Mine is here with me...

Giselle and Brady have essentially limitless options. It was Giselle who chose to leave. I am guessing you and your husband's options are much more limited, especially when you are overweight.

She chose to leave because her husband chose football over their family. All the options in the world to end up with a man who loves football more than he loves you and your kids. What good are those options?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I cannot believe your wife would not allow it if she no longer has an interest in sex.

If my husband gained 50 pounds and had no interest in sex I would definitely look for an AP. No interest in leaving the marriage itself.

Same here, another DW. I cannot have sex with a obese person, I did not marry an obese person. I imagine it's even harder for a man, I mean, maybe he cannot get aroused anymore.

What makes you think they are obese? You can gain 50 pounds and not be obese, especially since if it's a tall man.

OP's wife is a woman, and a 50 lbs weight gain would make her obese. You can't force attraction.

Not necessarily.

I went from 138 to 188 pounds. I am 5' 8" and currently wear a size 10 in most clothing, size 12 in a few. I am overweight but not obese. And I was a size 2 at 138 on my wedding day.
You need to see the woman to make this call.
I am not saying I look the same, but a size 2 at 40 would be ridiculous for me. My rib cage was protruding back then. I look great at 170 pounds. So 18 pounds to lose, not 50.

Anyway, interesting that it is the wife not sleeping with him and not the other way round. I'd say she is the one not attracted to him, won't you?

PP, unless you are like 5’9” that is obese. And unless you are like 6’5” you are very very overweight.

Yeah, going from a size 2 to a size 10-12 is a drastic body change for any woman. To try to spin it otherwise is pretty wild.

I think you are creating your own arguments here. It's not obese. Like I said, 170 is a good weight for me. IMHO most women in their late 40s who are a size 2 have hard faces ( and they look nothing like Giselle), but to each his/ her own. Size 4-8 looks best at that age. That's what I am shooting for.

I was 176 at a wedding 2 years ago and I looked absolutely amazing. I wore a Calvin Klein size 8 jumpsuit to the pre wedding dinner, and got so many compliments. DH liked a lot. He thought I was too skinny at 138.

I will get back to 170, so not justifying being 188. But a 50 pound weight gain does not necessarily mean you are obese or you need to lose 50 pounds. You may need to lose 20, which is not that difficult to lose. You can gain some weight as you age and look great.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I cannot believe your wife would not allow it if she no longer has an interest in sex.

If my husband gained 50 pounds and had no interest in sex I would definitely look for an AP. No interest in leaving the marriage itself.

Same here, another DW. I cannot have sex with a obese person, I did not marry an obese person. I imagine it's even harder for a man, I mean, maybe he cannot get aroused anymore.

What makes you think they are obese? You can gain 50 pounds and not be obese, especially since if it's a tall man.

OP's wife is a woman, and a 50 lbs weight gain would make her obese. You can't force attraction.

Not necessarily.

I went from 138 to 188 pounds. I am 5' 8" and currently wear a size 10 in most clothing, size 12 in a few. I am overweight but not obese. And I was a size 2 at 138 on my wedding day.
You need to see the woman to make this call.
I am not saying I look the same, but a size 2 at 40 would be ridiculous for me. My rib cage was protruding back then. I look great at 170 pounds. So 18 pounds to lose, not 50.

Anyway, interesting that it is the wife not sleeping with him and not the other way round. I'd say she is the one not attracted to him, won't you?

I'm 47 y/o, 5'7 and 125 lbs and look great, I don't have any bones sticking out but I'm also very small boned - my wrist is 5.5 inches. Gisele is 5'11 and around 130 lbs and looks amazing. I've been married for 20 years, and I think it's a reasonable request and expectation in a relationship to have intimacy and stay in shape. A marriage is a romantic relationship, not a roommate situation.

Good for you.

I couldn't be 125 pounds. I definitely look better at 188 than 125. That's for sure.

I am not Giselle, and don't want to be. And where is her DH? Mine is here with me...

Giselle and Brady have essentially limitless options. It was Giselle who chose to leave. I am guessing you and your husband's options are much more limited, especially when you are overweight.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I cannot believe your wife would not allow it if she no longer has an interest in sex.

If my husband gained 50 pounds and had no interest in sex I would definitely look for an AP. No interest in leaving the marriage itself.

Same here, another DW. I cannot have sex with a obese person, I did not marry an obese person. I imagine it's even harder for a man, I mean, maybe he cannot get aroused anymore.

What makes you think they are obese? You can gain 50 pounds and not be obese, especially since if it's a tall man.

OP's wife is a woman, and a 50 lbs weight gain would make her obese. You can't force attraction.

Not necessarily.

I went from 138 to 188 pounds. I am 5' 8" and currently wear a size 10 in most clothing, size 12 in a few. I am overweight but not obese. And I was a size 2 at 138 on my wedding day.
You need to see the woman to make this call.
I am not saying I look the same, but a size 2 at 40 would be ridiculous for me. My rib cage was protruding back then. I look great at 170 pounds. So 18 pounds to lose, not 50.

Anyway, interesting that it is the wife not sleeping with him and not the other way round. I'd say she is the one not attracted to him, won't you?

PP, unless you are like 5’9” that is obese. And unless you are like 6’5” you are very very overweight.

Did you create your own BMI calculator? It's not obese.

Technically true -- it's overweight and right on the cusp of obese according to the official government BMI standard. But the government doesn't have a monopoly on the definition of obese.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I cannot believe your wife would not allow it if she no longer has an interest in sex.

If my husband gained 50 pounds and had no interest in sex I would definitely look for an AP. No interest in leaving the marriage itself.

Same here, another DW. I cannot have sex with a obese person, I did not marry an obese person. I imagine it's even harder for a man, I mean, maybe he cannot get aroused anymore.

What makes you think they are obese? You can gain 50 pounds and not be obese, especially since if it's a tall man.

OP's wife is a woman, and a 50 lbs weight gain would make her obese. You can't force attraction.

Not necessarily.

I went from 138 to 188 pounds. I am 5' 8" and currently wear a size 10 in most clothing, size 12 in a few. I am overweight but not obese. And I was a size 2 at 138 on my wedding day.
You need to see the woman to make this call.
I am not saying I look the same, but a size 2 at 40 would be ridiculous for me. My rib cage was protruding back then. I look great at 170 pounds. So 18 pounds to lose, not 50.

Anyway, interesting that it is the wife not sleeping with him and not the other way round. I'd say she is the one not attracted to him, won't you?

PP, unless you are like 5’9” that is obese. And unless you are like 6’5” you are very very overweight.

Did you create your own BMI calculator? It's not obese.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I cannot believe your wife would not allow it if she no longer has an interest in sex.

If my husband gained 50 pounds and had no interest in sex I would definitely look for an AP. No interest in leaving the marriage itself.

Same here, another DW. I cannot have sex with a obese person, I did not marry an obese person. I imagine it's even harder for a man, I mean, maybe he cannot get aroused anymore.

What makes you think they are obese? You can gain 50 pounds and not be obese, especially since if it's a tall man.

OP's wife is a woman, and a 50 lbs weight gain would make her obese. You can't force attraction.

Not necessarily.

I went from 138 to 188 pounds. I am 5' 8" and currently wear a size 10 in most clothing, size 12 in a few. I am overweight but not obese. And I was a size 2 at 138 on my wedding day.
You need to see the woman to make this call.
I am not saying I look the same, but a size 2 at 40 would be ridiculous for me. My rib cage was protruding back then. I look great at 170 pounds. So 18 pounds to lose, not 50.

Anyway, interesting that it is the wife not sleeping with him and not the other way round. I'd say she is the one not attracted to him, won't you?

I'm 47 y/o, 5'7 and 125 lbs and look great, I don't have any bones sticking out but I'm also very small boned - my wrist is 5.5 inches. Gisele is 5'11 and around 130 lbs and looks amazing. I've been married for 20 years, and I think it's a reasonable request and expectation in a relationship to have intimacy and stay in shape. A marriage is a romantic relationship, not a roommate situation.

Good for you.

I couldn't be 125 pounds. I definitely look better at 188 than 125. That's for sure.

I am not Giselle, and don't want to be. And where is her DH? Mine is here with me...

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I cannot believe your wife would not allow it if she no longer has an interest in sex.

If my husband gained 50 pounds and had no interest in sex I would definitely look for an AP. No interest in leaving the marriage itself.

Same here, another DW. I cannot have sex with a obese person, I did not marry an obese person. I imagine it's even harder for a man, I mean, maybe he cannot get aroused anymore.

What makes you think they are obese? You can gain 50 pounds and not be obese, especially since if it's a tall man.

OP's wife is a woman, and a 50 lbs weight gain would make her obese. You can't force attraction.

Not necessarily.

I went from 138 to 188 pounds. I am 5' 8" and currently wear a size 10 in most clothing, size 12 in a few. I am overweight but not obese. And I was a size 2 at 138 on my wedding day.
You need to see the woman to make this call.
I am not saying I look the same, but a size 2 at 40 would be ridiculous for me. My rib cage was protruding back then. I look great at 170 pounds. So 18 pounds to lose, not 50.

Anyway, interesting that it is the wife not sleeping with him and not the other way round. I'd say she is the one not attracted to him, won't you?

PP, unless you are like 5’9” that is obese. And unless you are like 6’5” you are very very overweight.

Yeah, going from a size 2 to a size 10-12 is a drastic body change for any woman. To try to spin it otherwise is pretty wild.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I cannot believe your wife would not allow it if she no longer has an interest in sex.

If my husband gained 50 pounds and had no interest in sex I would definitely look for an AP. No interest in leaving the marriage itself.

Same here, another DW. I cannot have sex with a obese person, I did not marry an obese person. I imagine it's even harder for a man, I mean, maybe he cannot get aroused anymore.

What makes you think they are obese? You can gain 50 pounds and not be obese, especially since if it's a tall man.

OP's wife is a woman, and a 50 lbs weight gain would make her obese. You can't force attraction.

Not necessarily.

I went from 138 to 188 pounds. I am 5' 8" and currently wear a size 10 in most clothing, size 12 in a few. I am overweight but not obese. And I was a size 2 at 138 on my wedding day.
You need to see the woman to make this call.
I am not saying I look the same, but a size 2 at 40 would be ridiculous for me. My rib cage was protruding back then. I look great at 170 pounds. So 18 pounds to lose, not 50.

Anyway, interesting that it is the wife not sleeping with him and not the other way round. I'd say she is the one not attracted to him, won't you?

PP, unless you are like 5’9” that is obese. And unless you are like 6’5” you are very very overweight.

Anonymous wrote:I’m a firm believer that every DW would have enthusiastic and frequent relations with any DH who turns her on and gives her consistent, reliable “happy endings.”

There’s the rub. Monogamy is a desire killer.

I’m a firm believer that every DW would have enthusiastic and frequent relations with any DH who turns her on and gives her consistent, reliable “happy endings.”