Anonymous
Post 07/23/2022 21:34     Subject: If you were lmc but snagged someone "old money"
Anonymous wrote:I fell on hard times and worked in child care; he was dark, moody, and handsome. He fell in love with my plain looks and strong moral character. We were about to say our vows when I learned he was already married — and kept his wife in the attic. I was distraught and fled. Later, after coming into an unexpected inheritance, I returned, and it turned out a fire had conveniently burned down his house — and his wife too. Reader, I married him.


Someone already did that one.
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2022 21:34     Subject: If you were lmc but snagged someone "old money"
I was a single mom working as a maid in Manhattan, in a fancy hotel. My butt was large and amazingly beautiful, especially in my uniform. I tried on someone's designer coat, and a rich guy mistook me for a rich girl. He also helped my son with his homework. We fell in love and had a marvelous affair. I got fired but that's okay because he's still my boyfriend and also all my friends got management jobs.
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2022 21:31     Subject: If you were lmc but snagged someone "old money"
I fell on hard times and worked in child care; he was dark, moody, and handsome. He fell in love with my plain looks and strong moral character. We were about to say our vows when I learned he was already married — and kept his wife in the attic. I was distraught and fled. Later, after coming into an unexpected inheritance, I returned, and it turned out a fire had conveniently burned down his house — and his wife too. Reader, I married him.
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2022 21:30     Subject: If you were lmc but snagged someone "old money"
She was living in an uptown world, and I was a backstreet guy. When she knew what she wanted from her time, she woke up and she made up her mind. I still can't afford to buy her pearls, but whatever.
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2022 21:23     Subject: Re:If you were lmc but snagged someone "old money"
Anonymous wrote:I was whisked away to live with my mother in London when war broke out on the European continent. Managed to get a degree at Cambridge, where I cultivated my skills as as the perfect dinner guest, qualifying me to secure a spot as lapdog to an oil magnate. That positioned me to meet DW, an American utility heiress. Not sure why she took to me; her previous DH was a prince. She did ask me to add a "Von" to my name to make me seem an aristocrat, and of course I obliged.

She was forgiving over my minor affairs here and there and that small matter of my father's collaboration with the Nazis. And I was forgiving of her propensity to experiment with prescription drugs. I am just waiting for the unpleasantness of her last indulgence in her hobby to blow over and resume my life as the perfect dinner guest.


What movie is this?
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2022 21:11     Subject: If you were lmc but snagged someone "old money"
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I lived in Virginia and was a surveyor making a county employee salary , then I became an army officer. Typical NoVA but I managed to marry the wealthiest widow in America and the rest, as they say, is history.


I will add that despite all that money, we had to live down (gasp) Route 1 in the Fairfax county part of Alexandria.


However, you have a nice little mansion on a hill overlooking the Potomac.
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2022 20:33     Subject: If you were lmc but snagged someone "old money"
I met him through my sister. She told me he was bad news, but I didn't listen. He told me his wife didn't understand him, but I didn't listen to that either. I wasn't willing to be just another AP; I held out until he got through a very messy divorce and then accepted his proposal. How could I not? This man moved heaven and earth for me.

Sadly, in the end I lost my head over him after all. After the separation, his serial monogamy streak continued. Second verse, same as the first...
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2022 20:20     Subject: If you were lmc but snagged someone "old money"
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I married rich, and my life was pretty perfect, sailing around the world on the family yacht. My spouse was kind of high maintenance, but luckily for me, she fell overboard in some coastal podunk town in oregon and got amnesia, so I was able to abandon her in the small town hospital. Now I sail the world with a bunch of hot babes in 80s bikinis. Life has never been better!


Interesting because my spouse had amnesia when we got together but we built a mini golf course together and then eventually she recovered her memory and it turned out she was rich!


Oh sir pretty sure you were aware of the amnesia and were hoping she would pay off a debt to you
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2022 19:32     Subject: If you were lmc but snagged someone "old money"
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I lived in Virginia and was a surveyor making a county employee salary , then I became an army officer. Typical NoVA but I managed to marry the wealthiest widow in America and the rest, as they say, is history.


I will add that despite all that money, we had to live down (gasp) Route 1 in the Fairfax county part of Alexandria.


Even though you ended up in the Mount Vernon pyramid, it was okay because you and your wife never had any children
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2022 19:11     Subject: Re:If you were lmc but snagged someone "old money"
Anonymous wrote:This thread is amazing. And I love that OP complained to Jeff because it is off topic and Jeff agreed that it is off topic but too funny to lock!!


Quickly getting inducted into the DCUM Hall of Fame!
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2022 19:11     Subject: If you were lmc but snagged someone "old money"
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I lived in Virginia and was a surveyor making a county employee salary , then I became an army officer. Typical NoVA but I managed to marry the wealthiest widow in America and the rest, as they say, is history.


I will add that despite all that money, we had to live down (gasp) Route 1 in the Fairfax county part of Alexandria.


Bonus points for the history angle! Well done!
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2022 19:09     Subject: Re:If you were lmc but snagged someone "old money"
Anonymous wrote:Someone rich thought I went to Princeton and knew his wayward son there, so I went with it and agreed to go to Europe and convince my “friend” to return to the states. I fell in love with the friend and his wife and their whole life, and they fell for my scam, so I killed my friend, took over his identity, and faked a will so I inherited his money. Got away with murder. Fooled almost everyone except a preppy fat dude who looked like Philip Seymour Hoffman, so I killed him too.


Twister. Classic.
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2022 19:06     Subject: If you were lmc but snagged someone "old money"
I bewitched him, body and soul, with my fine eyes and pert opinions.
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2022 19:04     Subject: If you were lmc but snagged someone "old money"
Anonymous wrote:I did Snow White and no one caught it 😢, I should have added a reference to dwarves I guess, but that would have gotten weird.


I got it - thought it was excellent working in the passed out kiss. And the apple martini. Nicely done.
Anonymous
Post 07/23/2022 18:58     Subject: If you were lmc but snagged someone "old money"
Anonymous wrote:I lived in Virginia and was a surveyor making a county employee salary , then I became an army officer. Typical NoVA but I managed to marry the wealthiest widow in America and the rest, as they say, is history.


I will add that despite all that money, we had to live down (gasp) Route 1 in the Fairfax county part of Alexandria.