Anonymous
Post 06/27/2022 22:20     Subject: DH embarrassed by my outfit for bbq
It looks more like mustard, but I can see why he asked you to change.
Anonymous
Post 06/27/2022 22:13     Subject: Re:DH embarrassed by my outfit for bbq
Anonymous wrote:OP here. Just to clarify for those saying I looked ridiculous and like Big Bird, below is a link to the actual shirt, and I wore it with blue denim jeans, NOT anything black.

https://poshmark.com/listing/NWT-Jcrew-Cotton-Off-The-Shoulder-Top-F2059-Shirt-Blouse-61996a67bcdb2f044ca41ebb?utm_source=gdm&utm_campaign=9886005321&campaign_id=9886005321&ad_partner=google&gskid=pla-1187535741595&gcid=431634791276&ggid=103371076954&gdid=c&g_network=g&enable_guest_buy_flow=true&gclid=CjwKCAjwquWVBhBrEiwAt1KmwobhcGqGiw9ZD7MhMiLF_sRhiMDK-bSDxdPxH0Krh6o7HCWqyOAMCBoCthEQAvD_BwE


Was really hoping that was going to be a link to a full on big bird costume. That would have been a hilarious end to the thread.

Alas, your husband is just a basic controlling jerk. I hope he steps up his game and is willing to work through his issues in therapy or something. If not, don’t let him gaslight you into second guessing your self worth and leave him if his behavior continues. You don’t need your sons growing up to believe this is ok.
Anonymous
Post 06/27/2022 20:49     Subject: Re:DH embarrassed by my outfit for bbq
OP here. Just to clarify for those saying I looked ridiculous and like Big Bird, below is a link to the actual shirt, and I wore it with blue denim jeans, NOT anything black.

https://poshmark.com/listing/NWT-Jcrew-Cotton-Off-The-Shoulder-Top-F2059-Shirt-Blouse-61996a67bcdb2f044ca41ebb?utm_source=gdm&utm_campaign=9886005321&campaign_id=9886005321&ad_partner=google&gskid=pla-1187535741595&gcid=431634791276&ggid=103371076954&gdid=c&g_network=g&enable_guest_buy_flow=true&gclid=CjwKCAjwquWVBhBrEiwAt1KmwobhcGqGiw9ZD7MhMiLF_sRhiMDK-bSDxdPxH0Krh6o7HCWqyOAMCBoCthEQAvD_BwE
Anonymous
Post 06/27/2022 17:40     Subject: DH embarrassed by my outfit for bbq
Genuinely concerned that there is a back and forth about this.

It is not ok to sincerely demand your partner change out of a shirt you don’t like and threaten to leave without them if they don’t comply. It’s not ok to make fun of your partner in ways that genuinely hurt or embarrass them. It is not ok to leave with the kids in the middle of a very petty fight to prove a point.

Anonymous
Post 06/27/2022 17:30     Subject: DH embarrassed by my outfit for bbq
Time to get your ducks in line, OP. It's likely going to get worse.
Anonymous
Post 06/27/2022 17:29     Subject: DH embarrassed by my outfit for bbq
My DH has never, not once, in more than 20 years of marriage, criticized what I'm wearing. Not once.
Anonymous
Post 06/27/2022 17:21     Subject: Re:DH embarrassed by my outfit for bbq
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:The only thing OP said her DH did was make fun of her outfit. It's not clear if he refused to let her come to the party unless she changed, or if OP was pissed off at his bumblebee comment and refused to go to the party. The first scenario is abuse. The second scenario is super immaturity on OP's part.

I am surprised so many people are calling him abusive when OP's original facts are so lacking.

OP - we need more info.



Enough of your trolling!

There's absolutely nothing that can justify OP's husband mocking her outfit , having their children movk her outfit. Getting upset when she didn't change and then taking their kids and leaving because he didn't get his way.
That's abusive behavior period.

We don't excuse abusive behavior on DCUM so I suggest you go troll elsewhere.


If my DH's outfit looks absurd, like shirt too short and pants too low, I tell him I won't be seen with him, and our daughter mocks him too until he changes. Its because we care that he not embarass himself.

I just don't understand the double standard here. If you are a true feminist like me (I am a 3rd generation college educated mother, financially independent, and the bread winner of my home), well then it goes both ways. If I look like a bumble bee, I want to know too.


Women can be abusers too. You are not a feminist, you are a bully.
Anonymous
Post 06/27/2022 17:12     Subject: DH embarrassed by my outfit for bbq
You could be my friend. Her husband is an awful controlling narcissist. More demanding then a toddler. Overall uninvolved raising the kids. But divorcing the big breadwinner in a high COL area with small kids is a huge decision and it may be easier to put up with the issues. My friend would love to divorce her husband. But she stays home in their 3mm house. It would be a huge downgrade in terms of lifestyle to then be miserable working a job for 80k to get by in expensive DC.
Anonymous
Post 06/27/2022 17:05     Subject: DH embarrassed by my outfit for bbq
Sounds like he made up any reason for you not to go to the BBQ. You could have come downstairs in red and had the same outcome. He doesn't like you.
Anonymous
Post 06/27/2022 15:44     Subject: Re:DH embarrassed by my outfit for bbq
Anonymous wrote:So let me see if I got this right. You dressed up as a bee. Your husband got mad, made fun of you, and took the kids to a BBQ. You came to post on DCUM.

In reality: Your husband wanted some honey from his bumblebee and you denied him. He threw a tantrum and went to his friends BBQ with the kids. You came to post on DCUM.



What a freakin' moronic post. #fail
Anonymous
Post 06/27/2022 15:36     Subject: Re:DH embarrassed by my outfit for bbq
Anonymous wrote:So let me see if I got this right. You dressed up as a bee. Your husband got mad, made fun of you, and took the kids to a BBQ. You came to post on DCUM.

In reality: Your husband wanted some honey from his bumblebee and you denied him. He threw a tantrum and went to his friends BBQ with the kids. You came to post on DCUM.


Gaslighting at its finest. Or just a pathetic troll. Buzz off.
Anonymous
Post 06/27/2022 15:33     Subject: Re:DH embarrassed by my outfit for bbq
So let me see if I got this right. You dressed up as a bee. Your husband got mad, made fun of you, and took the kids to a BBQ. You came to post on DCUM.

In reality: Your husband wanted some honey from his bumblebee and you denied him. He threw a tantrum and went to his friends BBQ with the kids. You came to post on DCUM.

Anonymous
Post 06/27/2022 15:22     Subject: DH embarrassed by my outfit for bbq
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Not everyone wants to attend a BBQ with Big Bird.


+1

My DH had an outfit that reminded me of an all blue, shiney head to toe Grimace (McDonalds), and it made me die laughing whenever he put it on. I'd say omg, you look like Grimace, I can't let you go out like that!!!!


Hopefully, you can see how what you wrote is very different from what happened to OP.


Both people looked stupid, neither wanted to be seen with the other.
Anonymous
Post 06/27/2022 15:20     Subject: DH embarrassed by my outfit for bbq
If you look ridiculous you should laugh it off or change, whining on dcum seems like a poor alternative.
Anonymous
Post 06/27/2022 15:19     Subject: DH embarrassed by my outfit for bbq
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Not everyone wants to attend a BBQ with Big Bird.


+1

My DH had an outfit that reminded me of an all blue, shiney head to toe Grimace (McDonalds), and it made me die laughing whenever he put it on. I'd say omg, you look like Grimace, I can't let you go out like that!!!!


Hopefully, you can see how what you wrote is very different from what happened to OP.