Anonymous wrote:It’s so creepy that you would even remember who she said was there the first time.

Do you have a massive brain injury such as CTE or something like that?

Of course he would remember if she'd said her her ex was there and she didn't until now.

It's probably nothing but remembering and asking about it on this forum is not creepy or being jealous.

The problem lies in her not telling you beforehand. If it wasn't a big deal she would have told you about the guys joining before she even went out and got drunk. Yes, she likely engaged in something inappropriate. Her casually mentioning it now is a form of gaslighting. What you do with it depends on what your end goal is..
I personally wouldn't make a big deal about it, but keep a watchful eye.

It’s so creepy that you would even remember who she said was there the first time.

Anonymous wrote:If you changed the genders, DCUM would be advising you to file for divorce first thing next week.

But since the woman is the potential "suspect" this time, then they are making up all kinds of excuses for her, as usual.

If you're a MGTOW, why are you here? I know your type has a weird masochistic streak but can't you get your fix somewhere else?

It was 5 years ago. Could be something but more likely nothing. She did not want you to freak out. And here you are freaking out 5 years later when whatever it was or was not has no impact on your marriage.

Dude, it was 5 years ago. Let it go.

If you changed the genders, DCUM would be advising you to file for divorce first thing next week.

But since the woman is the potential "suspect" this time, then they are making up all kinds of excuses for her, as usual.

Nothing happened and she didn't tell you because look what you're doing now.

Anonymous wrote:1. They hooked up.
2. Nothing happened, but she thinks you're weird guys being around her, so she didn't want to tell you.
3. Nothing happened, but she wanted to feel young/flirty again.

My gut says it's #3.

4. Fingercuffs with Scott and Tom.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nothing happened. If it did you bet EVERYONE there would remember to never mention he was there.

This. If she slept w/ him no way she’d mention it … even 5 yrs later.

+1

If she slept with him, you would have never known he was there. She didn’t say anything because she knew you would be weird about it.

+1000 You are not going to casually mention someone you cheated on your spouse with in front of them. The fact she mentioned him now means she didn't want to tell you at the time (most likely because she knew you would be jealous) and forgot that she had not told you. It may demonstrate that your relationship has matured in the past 5 years.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nothing happened. If it did you bet EVERYONE there would remember to never mention he was there.

This. If she slept w/ him no way she’d mention it … even 5 yrs later.

+1

If she slept with him, you would have never known he was there. She didn’t say anything because she knew you would be weird about it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe she didn’t mention it bc you are weird and jealous?

If he's anything like my husband, that's the answer. I would never ever cheat, just something I know about myself, but when I used to have a social life in the first 10 years of marriage, I would rarely mention if a guy was around when out my sisters or girl friends.

I think it's this too. If anything had happened they wouldn't be casually talking about it now, Tom would be a "he who shall not be named." She probably knows you're the jealous type and didn't want to deal with your lack of trust and making something out of nothing, so just didn't mention it. And here you are, 5 years later making a big deal out of something most likely innocuous, so seems she was right about that part.

Anonymous wrote:Maybe she didn’t mention it bc you are weird and jealous?

If he's anything like my husband, that's the answer. I would never ever cheat, just something I know about myself, but when I used to have a social life in the first 10 years of marriage, I would rarely mention if a guy was around when out my sisters or girl friends.

Maybe she didn’t mention it bc you are weird and jealous?

Anonymous wrote:Nothing happened. If it did you bet EVERYONE there would remember to never mention he was there.

This. If she slept w/ him no way she’d mention it … even 5 yrs later.