Anonymous
Post 08/27/2021 21:07     Subject: Anytime DH and I Fight He Goes on Strike
Anonymous wrote:Does he ever, at any level, acknowledge this is an incredibly immature and passive-aggressive way to approach things?


Does OP ever, at any level, acknowledge she must be contributing to this as well?
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2021 21:01     Subject: Anytime DH and I Fight He Goes on Strike
It’s relatively new probably because he is finally sick and tired of you. This is one way how marriages start to disintegrate. Whatever is going on, you’re not helping resolve it. He is escalating and letting you know how he feels through his actions and you seem dumbfounded. Maybe take a look at how your contributing to this.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2021 17:02     Subject: Anytime DH and I Fight He Goes on Strike
Anonymous wrote:Honey, I've noticed you go on strike whenever we fight. Examples, (list examples). From now on when this happens, after you are done being on strike, I will be leaving for a hotel for the same number of days.

If he goes on strike say, forever, get a divorce and then when he has visitation he'll have to do it all.


Sure.And I'll tell the kids that you're leaving because you don't love them.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2021 13:44     Subject: Anytime DH and I Fight He Goes on Strike
Honey, I've noticed you go on strike whenever we fight. Examples, (list examples). From now on when this happens, after you are done being on strike, I will be leaving for a hotel for the same number of days.

If he goes on strike say, forever, get a divorce and then when he has visitation he'll have to do it all.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2021 13:43     Subject: Anytime DH and I Fight He Goes on Strike
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Sounds like he does what many women do, or are encouraged to do when they are not feeling appreciated by their husbands in hopes they realize how much they do.


Does he ignore the kids completely? Like does he not talk to or engage with them at all ?


I'm curious what these fights are about. Are you telling him he doesn't do enough?


Was going to say the same thing. You see this being advocated here all the time...

"Just stop doing house stuff..."

"Just stop sex... "


With that said, it is bad behavior no matter who does it. It is a pressure tactic and that isn't how a relationship should work.



Curtailing sex is completely different than stopping being an adult keeping a household with three kids running!
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2021 13:41     Subject: Anytime DH and I Fight He Goes on Strike
Anonymous wrote:Relatively new behavior within the last two years.

He stops doing anything related to runnnig a household with kids. Doesn't load or unload dishwasher, doesnt grocery shop, doesnt do pick ups or drop off, won't cut the grass, won't take ut the trash, doesn't fix any meals etc.

We are married for 16 years and have 3 kids (8, 9, 13).


How many of these arguments are you expressing an opinion about HOW he does these tasks?
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2021 13:20     Subject: Anytime DH and I Fight He Goes on Strike
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Why don't you stop doing what's causing this behavior?


Couples should be able to fight without someone behaving like a pouty teen.


Wrong, MATURE couples should be able to fight without someone behaving like a teenager.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2021 13:19     Subject: Anytime DH and I Fight He Goes on Strike
Anonymous wrote:Escalate. Head out to a hotel for the weekend and leave him with the kids


Abandonment. Nice suggestion idiot.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2021 13:17     Subject: Anytime DH and I Fight He Goes on Strike
Anonymous wrote:Does he ever, at any level, acknowledge this is an incredibly immature and passive-aggressive way to approach things?


Do you, OP, respond by withholding sex? You did not mention that part.

Sounds like marriage counseling is in order.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2021 09:15     Subject: Anytime DH and I Fight He Goes on Strike
Anonymous wrote:Why don't you stop doing what's causing this behavior?


Couples should be able to fight without someone behaving like a pouty teen.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2021 09:14     Subject: Anytime DH and I Fight He Goes on Strike
Anonymous wrote:I mean, does he still eat meals and wear clothes? Because I for sure would not be serving this manchild dinner or doing his laundry...

The pickups and drop offs are weird, does he just leave the kid at daycare until they call CPS?


Yeah this is the part that got me. 100% not okay
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2021 08:59     Subject: Anytime DH and I Fight He Goes on Strike
Why don't you stop doing what's causing this behavior?
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2021 08:38     Subject: Anytime DH and I Fight He Goes on Strike
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Sounds like he does what many women do, or are encouraged to do when they are not feeling appreciated by their husbands in hopes they realize how much they do.


Does he ignore the kids completely? Like does he not talk to or engage with them at all ?


I'm curious what these fights are about. Are you telling him he doesn't do enough?


Was going to say the same thing. You see this being advocated here all the time...

"Just stop doing house stuff..."

"Just stop sex... "


With that said, it is bad behavior no matter who does it. It is a pressure tactic and that isn't how a relationship should work.






I agree it's not the most helpful or healthy approach for a relationship. I just found it interesting to see the genders reversed.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2021 08:28     Subject: Re:Anytime DH and I Fight He Goes on Strike
I am impressed at how much your husband is doing and I now think mine has to step up!
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2021 08:09     Subject: Anytime DH and I Fight He Goes on Strike
I mean, does he still eat meals and wear clothes? Because I for sure would not be serving this manchild dinner or doing his laundry...

The pickups and drop offs are weird, does he just leave the kid at daycare until they call CPS?