Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Man gets a new job and has a coworker who is so beautiful, he asks her out immediately. She declines because she has a boyfriend. He continues to ask for 2 years. She eventually says yes, and they marry within 6 months. They are celebrating their 35th anniversary this year.

These stories are never cute.

These stories illustrate the fine line of courtship and honestly how the extreme positions on both sides are harmful. A perfect illustration of the badness of extremes.

I am positive the woman in the story above would be offended to have two judgmental women tell her that she shouldn't be happy about her own story. Women are different, men are different. Some women enjoy being pursued, some men enjoy pursuit and the opposite on both ends.

Relentlessly pursuing someone who is showing no interest and doing so in a way that invades their personal and professional space is gross/wrong/sexual harassment. But showing no interest in anyone because you are afraid of offending will leave you alone and lonely. And in some cases, turn off a whole lot of women!

Who are you and PP to say this relationship that has lasted more than three decades is 'gross' and not cute. These things always come down to the specifics of the people involved. While I don't think we need to overly romanticize the idea of a man continuing to pursue after being rejected as an overall trope, I would never say that a real couple's love story is wrong/distasteful/whatever.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know two people that were both self described whores. Male had slept with over 400 woman, female had slept with over 100. They hooked up a couple times then ended up spending a week trapped in a city during a snow storm. Day 3 they looked at each other and said you want to give this a go? 15 years later they are a very happy very monogamous married couple.

Haha! Classic rule of 3 with those numbers

The rule of 3 is right. I often read DateLab in WaPo, and it frustrates me to no end how many people rate the date as a 4/5 but don't want a second date because they "didn't feel a connection" immediately. No wonder they're still looking for a partner.

A good conversation or a few things in common is worth exploring, single people!

Anonymous wrote:Man gets a new job and has a coworker who is so beautiful, he asks her out immediately. She declines because she has a boyfriend. He continues to ask for 2 years. She eventually says yes, and they marry within 6 months. They are celebrating their 35th anniversary this year.

These stories are never cute.

My cousin and his wife met in elementary school. BFF, crush, puppy love - whatever you call it at that stage, they have been inseparable since. Got married at 28, after both finished their doctorates. Now in their 40s, with three kids and still going strong.

My spouse and I went to college together - we were BF. she was interested in more, but I thought she was really nice....FF a few years, still BF, but feelings growing. Everyone thought we were dating but us - we were scared to move into that realm officially. We knew that for us to start dating it meant we would either get married or eventually end our friendship....there was no middle ground.

over thirty years later, three wonderful kids, two dogs....have been some bumps in the road but I still love her.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Man gets a new job and has a coworker who is so beautiful, he asks her out immediately. She declines because she has a boyfriend. He continues to ask for 2 years. She eventually says yes, and they marry within 6 months. They are celebrating their 35th anniversary this year.

Ummmm..this isn't at all appealing to me as cute, based on your description. He starts hitting on someone ("immediately") at work? That's inappropriate and shows a lack of self-control. And also, it was only because of her looks?
Then the man continues to ask for 2 years? Does not accept the woman's refusal for 2 years? Also creepy/smothering.
She finally says yes...and they live happily ever after? I don't begrudge them their 35 years of marriage, but being married for 35 years doesn't necessarily mean it's been romantic enough to offset the weird 2-year beginning.
PP, is this your own 'love story'? If so, you need to work on your delivery. The man in question doesn't sound at all appealing enough for a 'cute love story.' Maybe there are a lot more layers (e.g. 'after two years, they had worked through so many tough times at their organization that she saw how adversity brought out his strong traits; and by then they had uncovered so many common interests that she saw him as her soul mate"). But that's not what you wrote, so ...it doesn't come across so well.

Looks like someone doesn’t have their own cute love story and needs to make a thing out of it??

PP here - I also know a woman whose divorced dad offered to hold a baby on a flight so the mom could use the bathroom. They started chatting and eventually married one another.

My grandparents played mixed doubles against each other. He was impressed she got along so well with her brother / tennis partner. The award trophy was a plate and she said, “Why don’t we have dinner of this sometime?” It was the 1920s.

My cousin had a college classmate who always had a bit of a crush on her. They were friends and he asked her out repeatedly over a few years, but she didn't date (traditional family and very focused on getting into med school) and always said no. Finally when they were in their senior year, she realized she had feelings for him. He asked her out again, but she mentioned that her mother wouldn't approve unless they got married. So he asked her to marry him, I think on their first real date, and 25 years and two kids later, they're still happily ever after.

I know a couple that won a contest for their meet cute story. They married quickly (second marriage for the woman) and got divorced. The wife had a meet cute with the third husband as well.

I met my now husband, who went to another high school in my state, when we were 14 and competed in the same (coed) activity. I thought he was cute and nice and wrote that in my journal at the time. I then never saw him again until we coincidentally ended up at the same college four years later. He recognized me and we ended up having lunch on the very first day together. We’ve now been married for 26 years.

I married my 12 step program sponsor's son. She "happened" to have him stop by when we were together, and he was so hot.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Man gets a new job and has a coworker who is so beautiful, he asks her out immediately. She declines because she has a boyfriend. He continues to ask for 2 years. She eventually says yes, and they marry within 6 months. They are celebrating their 35th anniversary this year.

Ummmm..this isn't at all appealing to me as cute, based on your description. He starts hitting on someone ("immediately") at work? That's inappropriate and shows a lack of self-control. And also, it was only because of her looks?
Then the man continues to ask for 2 years? Does not accept the woman's refusal for 2 years? Also creepy/smothering.
She finally says yes...and they live happily ever after? I don't begrudge them their 35 years of marriage, but being married for 35 years doesn't necessarily mean it's been romantic enough to offset the weird 2-year beginning.
PP, is this your own 'love story'? If so, you need to work on your delivery. The man in question doesn't sound at all appealing enough for a 'cute love story.' Maybe there are a lot more layers (e.g. 'after two years, they had worked through so many tough times at their organization that she saw how adversity brought out his strong traits; and by then they had uncovered so many common interests that she saw him as her soul mate"). But that's not what you wrote, so ...it doesn't come across so well.

It does follow rom com protocol however.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know two people that were both self described whores. Male had slept with over 400 woman, female had slept with over 100. They hooked up a couple times then ended up spending a week trapped in a city during a snow storm. Day 3 they looked at each other and said you want to give this a go? 15 years later they are a very happy very monogamous married couple.

Haha! Classic rule of 3 with those numbers

Numbers aren’t inflated. I know his actual number and lowers it significantly because I didn’t want people saying it was BS.He is good friends with DH and we have been on vacation with him where he would hook up with 2-3 woman a day.

I believe it, have friends like this.

Anonymous wrote:Man gets a new job and has a coworker who is so beautiful, he asks her out immediately. She declines because she has a boyfriend. He continues to ask for 2 years. She eventually says yes, and they marry within 6 months. They are celebrating their 35th anniversary this year.

Ummmm..this isn't at all appealing to me as cute, based on your description. He starts hitting on someone ("immediately") at work? That's inappropriate and shows a lack of self-control. And also, it was only because of her looks?
Then the man continues to ask for 2 years? Does not accept the woman's refusal for 2 years? Also creepy/smothering.
She finally says yes...and they live happily ever after? I don't begrudge them their 35 years of marriage, but being married for 35 years doesn't necessarily mean it's been romantic enough to offset the weird 2-year beginning.
PP, is this your own 'love story'? If so, you need to work on your delivery. The man in question doesn't sound at all appealing enough for a 'cute love story.' Maybe there are a lot more layers (e.g. 'after two years, they had worked through so many tough times at their organization that she saw how adversity brought out his strong traits; and by then they had uncovered so many common interests that she saw him as her soul mate"). But that's not what you wrote, so ...it doesn't come across so well.