Anonymous
Post 08/13/2021 09:15     Subject: It's funny how so many are quick to tell a woman not to be picky about looks
Anonymous wrote:When in reality it's not women who are picky. If a woman posts about dating struggles one of the first things she's told is she should be open to dating guys shorter than her and who aren't conventionally attractive, she should change her standards of what she's attracted to because clearly, she's asking too much.

These same women are then told to conform to the average beauty standard to attract the less than average guys.



Guys are never told this. They are never told to go for the woman who might be a little chubby, or not super curvy, or who isn't into manicures, makeup, and blowouts every day etc. Their standards are never too high.


And the tired excuse that's given is well men are visual ( as if women don't care), and attraction can grow, and you can fix him up to your standards.

Total garbage, but I find it funny.


This is just comes off as whiny. Men are expected to ask the woman out. If you are asking someone out, you will pick someone who you find attractive. Most of your complaining seems to be in response to what other women find attractive about women.

Men’s ideal of attractiveness is not what women find attractive. Men do ask out, date and marry chubby or non- curvy women. Men do not care about manicures, makeup and blowouts. Those are things women judge other women on.

Instead of complaining how unfair it is. Start asking out guys you find attractive. That means you have to risk rejection just like men do but when a guys says yes you can not complained that you had to settle.
Anonymous
Post 08/13/2021 09:10     Subject: It's funny how so many are quick to tell a woman not to be picky about looks
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My husband freely admits he was looking for someone attractive and I freely admit that I was looking for someone with the potential to make a good income. We also just truly enjoy one another and want the same things out of life. Together 20 years and married for 17. What’s the issue?


The issue is that you are both superficial and most people don’t aspire to that but I’m glad you found each other and it works out.


NP here but I don't view that outlook as superficial. Everyone has standards for looks, class/income etc. The pp just set hers a little higher. These are just baseline standards in addition to being compatible in other ways. Nothing wrong with that.
Anonymous
Post 08/13/2021 08:58     Subject: It's funny how so many are quick to tell a woman not to be picky about looks
Anonymous wrote:Incels aside, most men are willing to compromise on looks/weight because reliable access to sex is a higher priority than waiting around for a model.

Women are more likely to be okay with being single unless/until they find someone who ticks all the boxes.


Hate to admit it, but I agree.
Anonymous
Post 08/13/2021 08:43     Subject: It's funny how so many are quick to tell a woman not to be picky about looks
Anonymous wrote:Women area also wrongfully told:

Let it go;
Outsource more;
Lower your expectations again;
Just focus on the kids, let the house go;
Go out with your friends more;
Just focus on the income he brings;
Maybe if he had a less intense job...;
Don't let the kids know


Most of those things aren't wrong, and can be good advice depending on the situation.
Anonymous
Post 08/13/2021 08:37     Subject: It's funny how so many are quick to tell a woman not to be picky about looks
Women area also wrongfully told:

Let it go;
Outsource more;
Lower your expectations again;
Just focus on the kids, let the house go;
Go out with your friends more;
Just focus on the income he brings;
Maybe if he had a less intense job...;
Don't let the kids know
Anonymous
Post 08/13/2021 08:12     Subject: It's funny how so many are quick to tell a woman not to be picky about looks
Incels aside, most men are willing to compromise on looks/weight because reliable access to sex is a higher priority than waiting around for a model.

Women are more likely to be okay with being single unless/until they find someone who ticks all the boxes.
Anonymous
Post 08/13/2021 08:08     Subject: It's funny how so many are quick to tell a woman not to be picky about looks
I definitely wanted a good-looking guy. I got a good-looking guy. We have beautiful children, as adults. In reality, good-looking people have it easier.
Anonymous
Post 08/13/2021 08:00     Subject: It's funny how so many are quick to tell a woman not to be picky about looks
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I think OP makes a good point. I don’t think that men are never told to settle on looks but if they are it’s very subtle (just general “make sure you’re going for women in their league) and it happens way more to women. “Lose weight” is the very first thing a lot of people say.




Or get contacts, straighter your hair, wear such and such outfit. She's also told, go out with the nerdy guy, with the glasses, who may be a little short, or a little overweight, and bald with balls stle, but he's super sweet and will make a great husband and father.


Meanwhile when was the last time you heard a guy being told to date the super tall girl, or the flat-chested girl, or the chubby nerdy girl with thinning, or curly frizzy hair and glasses with bad style because she has a good heart and will make an awesome wife and mother?


Yep. I have never seen somebody tell a guy guy he should be open dating to the chubby girl with frizzy hair.


Have you never gone out and public and looked at the couple out there? Open your eyes and you’ll see that men don’t need to be told that.
Anonymous
Post 08/13/2021 07:42     Subject: It's funny how so many are quick to tell a woman not to be picky about looks
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I think OP makes a good point. I don’t think that men are never told to settle on looks but if they are it’s very subtle (just general “make sure you’re going for women in their league) and it happens way more to women. “Lose weight” is the very first thing a lot of people say.




Or get contacts, straighter your hair, wear such and such outfit. She's also told, go out with the nerdy guy, with the glasses, who may be a little short, or a little overweight, and bald with balls stle, but he's super sweet and will make a great husband and father.


Meanwhile when was the last time you heard a guy being told to date the super tall girl, or the flat-chested girl, or the chubby nerdy girl with thinning, or curly frizzy hair and glasses with bad style because she has a good heart and will make an awesome wife and mother?


Yep. I have never seen somebody tell a guy guy he should be open dating to the chubby girl with frizzy hair.
Anonymous
Post 08/13/2021 07:41     Subject: It's funny how so many are quick to tell a woman not to be picky about looks
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I think OP makes a good point. I don’t think that men are never told to settle on looks but if they are it’s very subtle (just general “make sure you’re going for women in their league) and it happens way more to women. “Lose weight” is the very first thing a lot of people say.



Losing weight is an easy, surefire dunker of a way for many women to get more interest from men. You and I may not like this truth, but it doesn’t negate it.
m


It is the truth but for men not being as picky about looks opens up an equal number of options. Yet people are less likely to say it.
Anonymous
Post 08/13/2021 07:40     Subject: Re:It's funny how so many are quick to tell a woman not to be picky about looks
Anonymous wrote:This is just so inaccurate. People of both genders who want to be in relationships and have been single for a long time are told to be open to different things. IRL at least. Agree those single guys are not complaining on DCUM, so they're not getting that advice here.



And you are lying through your teeth.
Anonymous
Post 08/13/2021 07:39     Subject: It's funny how so many are quick to tell a woman not to be picky about looks
Anonymous wrote:I think OP makes a good point. I don’t think that men are never told to settle on looks but if they are it’s very subtle (just general “make sure you’re going for women in their league) and it happens way more to women. “Lose weight” is the very first thing a lot of people say.




Or get contacts, straighter your hair, wear such and such outfit. She's also told, go out with the nerdy guy, with the glasses, who may be a little short, or a little overweight, and bald with balls stle, but he's super sweet and will make a great husband and father.


Meanwhile when was the last time you heard a guy being told to date the super tall girl, or the flat-chested girl, or the chubby nerdy girl with thinning, or curly frizzy hair and glasses with bad style because she has a good heart and will make an awesome wife and mother?
Anonymous
Post 08/13/2021 07:37     Subject: Re:It's funny how so many are quick to tell a woman not to be picky about looks
This is just so inaccurate. People of both genders who want to be in relationships and have been single for a long time are told to be open to different things. IRL at least. Agree those single guys are not complaining on DCUM, so they're not getting that advice here.
Anonymous
Post 08/13/2021 07:36     Subject: It's funny how so many are quick to tell a woman not to be picky about looks
Anonymous wrote:I think OP makes a good point. I don’t think that men are never told to settle on looks but if they are it’s very subtle (just general “make sure you’re going for women in their league) and it happens way more to women. “Lose weight” is the very first thing a lot of people say.



Losing weight is an easy, surefire dunker of a way for many women to get more interest from men. You and I may not like this truth, but it doesn’t negate it.
Anonymous
Post 08/13/2021 07:35     Subject: Re:It's funny how so many are quick to tell a woman not to be picky about looks
Anonymous wrote:
Guys are never told this. They are never told to go for the woman who might be a little chubby, or not super curvy, or who isn't into manicures, makeup, and blowouts


Who gives a crap about your manicure? And what’s a blowout?


NP. You don’t know what a blowout is?