Anonymous wrote:

Explain to your kid what categories of workers are "tipped employees" whose salary is lower by law because the restaurant lobby convinced the DOL long ago that they make a ton in tips, effectively passing the obligation to pay the employee to the customer directly and enabling the worker to evade taxes more easily.

This is not entirely true. Waiters and other tipped employees must make at least the minimum wage in combined base pay plus tips. If the tips received are not enough to cover this, the employer must make up the difference.

Not that this is an excuse for not tipping, but it is important to understand that no waiter (even the worst one) is actually making $2.something/hour.

Not sure where everyone is getting 20% as a standard tip, though. 15% is standard in the US for average service. 20% for good service. And complain to the manager for bad service.

Counter service is generally not tipped, but I might do it if extra effort is involved in packaging my order or something similar.

Emily Post has a good discussion on tipping on her web site.

And, yes, adolescents should tip the same way as their parents.

"Not that this is an excuse for not tipping, but it is important to understand that no waiter (even the worst one) is actually making $2.something/hour."

Sorry to laugh, but no one enforces this. Typically it doesn't happen often, but people most definitely walk away with less than minimum wage. And it's SOP for managers to require servers to do pre- and post-serving work while on the clock at $2.13.

What happens more frequently is that you get a shift with few and poor tippers, and you technically make $9/hr at a restaurant with $25 entrees, where you'd expect to make more, and you still need to pay your rent.

Sorry, it's weird to think "no big deal if people don't tip according to custom, they'll still get minimum wage!" Imagine if you did a great job, your boss was like eh, I know you usually get a bonus based on sales, but I'm not feeling it today. But don't worry, I'll still pay you $7.25/hr." That's just not the job. It's harder to get a serving job than most minimum wage jobs because it's not supposed to be a minimum wage job.

I'm not talking about awful service or whether tipped workers should have a higher wage, or how we should just be like Europe or whatever. I'm talking about the situation here and now for competent service.

Anonymous wrote:^^ 15% might have been okay 30+ years ago, but not today. The wait staff salary has not changed in that time, and yours has. Trust me they need it more than you. If you're eating out, and have good service, you should tip 20%.

Then their employer should pay them more, not my problem to solve. After all, food prices have gone up significantly, so their 15-20% tip amount has proportionally increased.

Anonymous wrote:Do you tell your kids to tip on the total or on the pre-tax amount?

I use the total. Does anyone even look at the pretax amount?

Do you tell your kids to tip on the total or on the pre-tax amount?

Always round up and if you can't afford to tip then you can't afford to eat there.

Anonymous wrote:^^ 15% might have been okay 30+ years ago, but not today. The wait staff salary has not changed in that time, and yours has. Trust me they need it more than you. If you're eating out, and have good service, you should tip 20%.

Ten-percent was 30-35 years ago. I know because I lived through it. Then the standard became 15, followed by 18. Twenty to twenty-five percent is for gray service today.

Anonymous wrote:Explain to your kid what categories of workers are "tipped employees" whose salary is lower by law because the restaurant lobby convinced the DOL long ago that they make a ton in tips, effectively passing the obligation to pay the employee to the customer directly and enabling the worker to evade taxes more easily. In those cases, you the customer are the difference between that employee's kid having dinner tonight, or not, because the employer doesn't care, so tip well. For all others, the tip is gravy on top of the normal hourly wage, so you can feel free to tip emotionally, and not out of obligation.

Oh please. Like everything else in life, people make choices. If people don't like the uncertain income that comes with being a server who relies on tips, choose a different job where you are guaranteed a certain hourly wage.

Anonymous wrote:For me, restaurants are easy - I always tip 20% unless service was horrible. If it was outstanding I'll bump it up. I struggle with cafes and coffee shops where they have tipping options at the counter. Never sure how much to tip at places like that.

20 percent.

20% always and round up.

^^ 15% might have been okay 30+ years ago, but not today. The wait staff salary has not changed in that time, and yours has. Trust me they need it more than you. If you're eating out, and have good service, you should tip 20%.

Explain to your kid what categories of workers are "tipped employees" whose salary is lower by law because the restaurant lobby convinced the DOL long ago that they make a ton in tips, effectively passing the obligation to pay the employee to the customer directly and enabling the worker to evade taxes more easily.

This is not entirely true. Waiters and other tipped employees must make at least the minimum wage in combined base pay plus tips. If the tips received are not enough to cover this, the employer must make up the difference.

Not that this is an excuse for not tipping, but it is important to understand that no waiter (even the worst one) is actually making $2.something/hour.

Not sure where everyone is getting 20% as a standard tip, though. 15% is standard in the US for average service. 20% for good service. And complain to the manager for bad service.

Counter service is generally not tipped, but I might do it if extra effort is involved in packaging my order or something similar.

Emily Post has a good discussion on tipping on her web site.

And, yes, adolescents should tip the same way as their parents.

Anonymous wrote:20% for great service, 15% for average, 10% for poor service

Same here.

I'm not sure why I would teach my teen anything other than how I would tip?

Anonymous wrote:Explain to your kid what categories of workers are "tipped employees" whose salary is lower by law because the restaurant lobby convinced the DOL long ago that they make a ton in tips, effectively passing the obligation to pay the employee to the customer directly and enabling the worker to evade taxes more easily. In those cases, you the customer are the difference between that employee's kid having dinner tonight, or not, because the employer doesn't care, so tip well. For all others, the tip is gravy on top of the normal hourly wage, so you can feel free to tip emotionally, and not out of obligation.

OP here. Thank you - this does a good job of explaining what I would like to communicate.

Explain to your kid what categories of workers are "tipped employees" whose salary is lower by law because the restaurant lobby convinced the DOL long ago that they make a ton in tips, effectively passing the obligation to pay the employee to the customer directly and enabling the worker to evade taxes more easily. In those cases, you the customer are the difference between that employee's kid having dinner tonight, or not, because the employer doesn't care, so tip well. For all others, the tip is gravy on top of the normal hourly wage, so you can feel free to tip emotionally, and not out of obligation.

Anonymous wrote:How do you advise your teens/tweens about how to tip? Is your advice the same as how. you tip, or is it different?

Why would it possibly be different?