Don't do it. I've written about this before but it bears repeating--I was in exactly your position except we'd had dogs until a few years ago and while I love pets in theory, a few years off from caring for one made my life so much easier. But I gave in after all kinds of promises and assurances from my teens and my husband that I wouldn't have to do ANYTHING, that they would handle it all.

Liars, all of them. At this point I'm doing like 75% of the dog-related stuff. She's a fine dog, a little needy and medically more challenging that we had thought when we got her from the rescue, but I don't enjoy having her in the house. She's fun to play with but even that's gotten old by now for the kids, so I'm on that detail as well. If I could, I'd give her away and not look back, but that's not an option in any real sense. So here I am, stuck with a dog I didn't want for the next decade. Don't be me.

Just don't get a puppy, if you decide to get a dog. Way too much work.

Nope, don’t do it. You will get stuck with at least some and probably all of the work.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don’t lord your son’s messiness over him as a reason you can’t get a dog when it sounds like you won’t get one anyway!

I kinda agree. You don’t want a dog. It’s not the kid’s fault.

I agree 3. I never cleaned my room (but did dishes). However, by the time I was 12 was 100% on dog. I don't suggest that as it was kind of a lot and I always felt guilty because I had to go to school and such. In the end though, it's not up to the kid, it's up to you.

I you get a dog be prepared to spend at least 3 months housebreaking and being totally present. If puppy another year before it can be fully trusted in house. Then, having basically another child you have to plan for (vacation, vet, etc.).

Anonymous wrote:Don’t lord your son’s messiness over him as a reason you can’t get a dog when it sounds like you won’t get one anyway!

I kinda agree. You don’t want a dog. It’s not the kid’s fault.

Don’t lord your son’s messiness over him as a reason you can’t get a dog when it sounds like you won’t get one anyway!

I think it comes down to: is one adult willing to assume responsibility (either doing, delegating, enforcing, etc). If the answer is no, then absolutely not. If it's yes, then you can reconsider.

As for the 10-year-idea, that doesn't really make sense. There are countless older non-shedding, already housebroken dogs ready to be adopted.

But if your husband is not on board to be the primary caretaker, then it doesn't matter.

Let me save you the trouble of wondering what it will be like to have a dog. Most DHs and kids won't pick up poop if they can avoid it or clean up vomit or pee. Kids promise to walk the dog, but usually don't so mom or dad have to do it. Most of the work ends up falling on mom. Travel--even a day trip--becomes problematic when you have a dog. Leave the dogs to people who actually want them. They deserve that much.

I adore our dog, but I'm still glad I waited until I wanted a dog, since I knew I'd be the primary caregiver. My teens are very responsible kids, and they do help walk him, but my DH and I still do most of the work.

If it will make your children happy in this miserable world, get one. Maybe a beagle. there's so many you can adopt, they are sweet and laid back.

I just gave in after resisting for years and now love our new puppy. My husband takes him out first thing in the morning, which is the one thing I did not want to have to do. I don’t mind doing the rest. My kids are so happy. It is worth it to me.

Don't do it! It is really, really, ok to not want to have pets. Your kid can still have animals in his life (be dog walker, pet sitter, volunteer...etc.), and he will have the rest of his adult life to have alllll the animals he wants.

Signed,
someone who capitulated to cats and regrets it daily

Don't do it OP. Odds are that you'll end up resentful and not bond with the dog as a result.

I say this a 25-year dog owner with two dogs currently. And I have two cats, too.

ALL the adults in the household need to be genuinely enthusiastic about the dog ahead of time. Sure. There are certainly situations where the reluctant mom was won over and now the Lab is sleeping on her feet, like PP above. But the more likely scenario is mild resentment over the new workload and limits on freedom with an overlay of indifference.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
No. Dogs live at least 10 years—probably more. That’s a long time to be picking up poop and going on early morning walks when you’re not into it and your kids are in college.

OP here: DH wants dog but not if I refuse responsibility and he supports the concept that the older child has to show responsibility BEFORE dog-adoption talk starts. ANyway, this quoted poster makes an excellent point. Once the kids hit college, I'm hitting the world.

DH sounds like a pushover. How old are your children?

Anonymous wrote:
No. Dogs live at least 10 years—probably more. That’s a long time to be picking up poop and going on early morning walks when you’re not into it and your kids are in college.

OP here: DH wants dog but not if I refuse responsibility and he supports the concept that the older child has to show responsibility BEFORE dog-adoption talk starts. ANyway, this quoted poster makes an excellent point. Once the kids hit college, I'm hitting the world.